Reading Reviews for Public Humiliation
  
2 Reviews Found

Review #1, by willow1 Glitter, Scales and Potentially Jail

21st August 2013:
I love it! The emperor's new cloths is one of my very favorite stories and I think you did a lovely job with it!

Author's Response: Thank you, I'm really glad you liked it

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Review #2, by broadwaykat Glitter, Scales and Potentially Jail

13th August 2013:
Hey, So here's my review as promised. Firstly, I'd like to say thanks for joining the challenge. It's clear you had a really good grasp of the story you had, and I enjoyed your spin on it. I'm kind of a sucker for fashion-oriented stories, and while I haven’t seen a lot of adaptations of Emperor's New Clothes, I remember it being one of my favourites, and surprisingly enough I could totally see it being more adapted, just that most people seem to forget about it in lieu of princess stories – so kudos for you with taking a shot at it!

I love particular phrases you used in the story – they really enhance some of the descriptions and moments. In particular, I think I'll be finding was to work 'flamboyant abomination' into my vocabulary. You're also particularly good with structuring dialogue – I really enjoyed the interactions between Lucy and her friends at the shop.

Now for the sake of being a critical. Overall, the spelling and writing aspect of it, I didn't seem many problems with it. I think you did really good with Britishisms, although I had to look a few up. I think the only thing that made it a little hard to understand, was that there didn't seem to be any breaks to tell us when things were moving to a different day, or weeks, or time period. You would start a conversation at one moment; next paragraph we are suddenly weeks ahead, or hours later. Sometimes that can be helped by putting in a line break – and really, that's getting nit picky.

I think we all know someone like Estella – either personally, or through media and such – and I really enjoyed the fact that you didn't back away from the nastiness. Little things in your characterisation was really good; they all seemed like real people, if not necessarily people you'd want to hang out with, in the case of Estella or her too minions. Perhaps the only character that rubbed me a bit the wrong was was Benji – don't get me wrong, love him, adorable – but out of everything he seemed to be really stereotypical; he's the quote unquote 'fem guy' who works in the fashion industry, whereas people like Lucy, or Frankie were a little more fleshed out, because we got to see their true reactions, or hear about their past with Estella. Maybe if he were to appear in future stories, a similar fleshing out could be done.

Overall, a really interesting story. A neat look at the wizarding world outside of Hogwarts, and not in the Ministry, which a lot of people don't tend to touch on, in fan fiction. Good show!

Author's Response: Thank you so much for the amazing review. I absolutely loved Emporers New Clothes as well. I'm not sure why. But I am a sucker for fashion stories as well, so maybe thats it.
I have no idea where "flamboyant abomination" came from, but it stuck, and I really like it as well.
I wasn't sure about the whole moving to the next day thing. Thats my one problem with the story. Sometimes I don't know whether line breaks look odd or something, but I will definitely remember that.
Benji is the one character that I sigh at for being a bit cliche and stereotypical. I know everyone has a fem man in fashion, and he was originally straight, but it just sorta happened, and I felt like I needed him in the end. But I know that I didn't explain much about him, which i regret. Maybe I should do a whole Novella on "The Life of Benji!".
I do wish after Hogwarts less people would go straight to Aurors or Ministry, but I guess it is hard to think of what other jobs could be, since Rowling didn't really touch down much on the other options really.
Thank you again, and I had so much fun in your story


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