Reading Reviews for the futurist.
  
8 Reviews Found

Review #1, by theblacksisters the futurist.

23rd November 2013:
I'm not quite clear on one thing: is Lucius' death related in any way to what happened at the start of the story?

Author's Response: Hey! I hope I can answer this review well, but the answer isn't really a yes or a no (I love making things difficult for myself). Really, this story was a character exploration into the grey of a man that other's usually see as 'black and white'. Every scene highlights the good points and bad points of Lucius - in particular, the introduction, where it talks about redemption. Lucius didn't seek redemption - a problem, really, because he *should* have. He killed people. He tortured them, for no other reason than they had different blood and someone (Voldemort) told him to. Really, he should have attoned for his mistakes, after both the first war and the second, but he didn't. Though, in saying this, he wasn't a bad person, and in the other scenes I tried to highlight this. Everything he did was for his family - does that really make him bad? That though he did not seek redemption, he worked hard at trying to keep his family safe? (which obviously didn't work very well).
I think a lot of the time, there is a stigma around seeking forgiveness and redemption when a bad act is committed, but I really don't think that Lucius would have done this even if he knew he was in the wrong, mainly due to his pride. So, how I've highlighted his acceptance that he did something wrong, and his realisation that he did something wrong, was by viewing it through the lengths he went to to make sure that Draco and Narcissa were safe, even after his death.
So the beginning does play a part in the end. Redemption, through Lucius's mind, was achieved through loving his son - protecting his son. It was his ultimate goal - one that Rodolphus did not understand. He let those other Death Eaters die for his family - because in the end, war and a fight about bloodline is not nearly as important to him as the ones he loves. And though others are quick to label him as 'bad' because he did not seek forgivness, his son knows better, and that is why when he goes to see his father's grave, he sees that Lucius is redeemed - in his own eye (the only eye that mattered to Lucius).

Thank you for reviewing! I really hope that rambling answered your question okay :) - Mahalia


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Review #2, by love2read the futurist.

6th October 2013:
Incredible writing.this was one of the best depictions of lucius I've read.10/10

Author's Response: I'm happy you enjoyed it! Thank you very much for leaving a review.

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Review #3, by quixotic the futurist.

22nd August 2013:
Hi! I'm here to review your entry for the Death Eater Challenge!

First of all, apologies for the long delay, real life tends to get in the way of everything :(

Lucius is a complicated character. While he is one of Voldemort's most loyal followers, he is also one of the only family men among the Death Eaters. He has to often play a dual role- one as a murderer and the other as a role model for Draco. Reading the Harry Potter books, I realized that it was easy to mix these two roles up a bit, which is exactly what Lucius did.

Getting to your story, I liked how you used a range of time periods to describe Lucius. It portrayed Lucius from all angles. His selfishness, cowardliness as well as his quick thinking skills, loyalty and his love for the ones he held close. Everything flowed really well. Great Job :)

Your description is beautiful, especially during the battle between the Death Eaters and the Aurors. It made the situation come alive :)

Overall, this story was a pleasure to read and review. Thank you so much for participating in my challenge!

Author's Response: Hey there! It's really okay about the late review - I'm so sorry about the late response! Time just slips away sometimes, so I completely understand :)
I'm glad you recognised that Lucius is different from the other Death Eaters - being a family member, plus feeling love. I think it makes him a pretty special character, however I found that I had to take a fair bit into consideration when writing him - I wanted to make sure that all aspects of his personality were included, so we could see that he wasn't completely bad, but he wasn't at all good. I'm so glad it came across for you as a reader, and read well to boot! It means a lot to hear that, especially from the challenge creator! It was a lot of fun to do, so thank you for getting my brain working and leaving such a lovely review - it means a lot :) Thank you so much!


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Review #4, by adluvshp the futurist.

13th August 2013:
Hey! Here for Slytherin review tag xD

This was such an amazing story. Your descriptions
were so powerful and I was completely engrossed
while reading. I love Lucius Malfoy as a character and
I think you've portrayed him beautifully here. His
personality shows through clearly in line with canon in
all these snippets that were never included in canon
and I love that. I also liked your incorporation of
Draco in the story. I liked the way you portrayed him,
especially the light you showed him in at the end.

A great piece of writing!
10/10
Cheers
AD
(AditiDraco95)

Author's Response: Hello, thanks for stopping by! I'm really happy to hear that you liked this one-shot. I love Lucius as a character myself, and I've always felt like there was a lot more to him than what was portrayed in the books. As for Draco ... Well, I don't think I could ever write a story without him, haha. Anyway, I'm really, really happy to hear that you liked it, and thank you for leaving such a lovely review :)
- Mahalia


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Review #5, by marauderfan the futurist.

4th August 2013:
Oh, I'm glad you requested a review on this, it's nice to see what I'm competing against in the DE writing challenge hehe.

Well. This was amazing! Your descriptions are truly beautiful, and I love your writing style. It flows very well. You've structured the story reall well too, I think the bit in the beginning adds a lot, and I think it really sets the tone.

Your characterisation is really good too. I'm not the biggest fan of Lucius Malfoy but I love the way you've written him here. As a person he's not any more likable than he is in the books, but you've made me care about him in this piece, which says something! And, going back to that first paragraph, I find it very believable that Lucius didn't want redemption, that he didn't think he was wrong. His family mattered the most to him, but I think he still believed he had been on the right side in the war - he just gave up on the war at the end.

Draco was really well written too. I can see him as someone who wanted redemption. I liked the way you wrote the scene when he wanted information from his father, why he was leaving - the dialogue between Lucius and Draco was spot on as well.

The ending is lovely! I thought it was Lucius at first who was visiting the graveyard - I love that you kept me guessing until the last part. It was a very fitting ending, I think.

As for CC: There was one passage that wasn't very clear to me...

Lucius's head snaps up, just in time to watch as the man who called him fall rigid on the floor, spell hitting him square in the chest. He swallows heavily as he sees a witch run up to the body, grabbing his hand and pressing her fingers into his wrist. She is still for the moment, until she shakes her head sadly and drops his hand. She doesn't move from his cover, crouching by the dead man and wiping away her tears.
It is only then that Lucius realises they look exactly alike.
The twin's agony is enough to pull him out of his melancholy, and Lucius straightens himself up.


For most of that scene, the vagueness in the battle is good, but I can't tell what's happening in this particular segment. At first they seem like other DE's, because they were addressing Lucius, but then it seems like Lucius is just noticing a family resemblance between the two, that the fallen man and the woman are twins (?) - like he doesn't know them. So it's a little unclear in that passage, maybe you'll want to consider identifying who's who better, or at least mention that they're Death Eaters.

Also, active voice is usually much stronger than passive voice, so the place where you said "His lungs are filling with the putrid air" I think you could improve it by saying "His lungs fill with the putrid air".

Overall this was really lovely, great job!

Author's Response: Whoa! Has anybody told you you're a lovely reviewer? This was filled with just so much to get my brain thinking again and motivation going. Thank you so, so much! Your compliments had me blushing!
To hear that you felt for Lucius - just, wow. I wrote this as a piece as a kind of experiment, I suppose. I read a lot of stories on here that are real quick to throw the 'evil' label on Lucius, and I just don't really see him as an evil guy (that said, I don't think the movies helped much. He is quite chilling up until the fifth movie). I wanted to make sure that my readers knew that he didn't care for others, but his family meant the whole world to him. I'm glad to see it worked, too! I actually wrote that Lucius/Draco scene over and over, deleting nearly 1000 words at a time and re-writing it again. It was hard to write such a 'delicate' (in the eyes of fandom) relationship, while also making sure that readers knew that they had a strong father/son bond (I hope that made sense). When you read the second book, when Harry is trapped in Borgin and Burkes, and Lucius and Draco enter the shop, you can see that Draco has no real fear of his father, or questioning him. There's a fair bit of bantar and fathering, but it reading it again really had me thinking about how I could write their relationship realistically. I'm so, so happy to hear it worked!
I see what you mean about vagueness ... I will re-read that a few times and try to fix it up (maybe even just cut it out, altogether). And the voice! Active voice and passive voice are my worst enemies! Thank you so much for pointing it out, I'll be sure to get on that.
And thank you (again. And again. And a million times again) for leaving such a thoughtful, constructive review. It really means a lot! I'll be sure to check out your challenge entry too!
- Mahalia


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Review #6, by Dani the futurist.

1st August 2013:
this was a great one-shot. you write so well, and i actually came to like lucius (he's probably one of my least favourite characters). but you explained his actions well and your believability was high. 10/10

Author's Response: Wow, thanks for this lovely review. I'm glad you were able to understand and like Lucius by the end. Thank you!

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Review #7, by nott theodore the futurist.

31st July 2013:
Hello! Here for review tag!

I really enjoyed reading this story. Your portrayal of Lucius Malfoy was interesting and I've never actually seen a similar characterisation of him in any of the stories I've read on here before. There was real depth and complexity to his personality and I found it very compelling to read.

One of the things I enjoyed the most was the fact that you portrayed two very different sides to his character. On the one hand he seems very dedicated to Voldemort and has no thoughts or cares about killing in his name. I was actually surprised by how much I liked reading about him that way; I think because we know that the Malfoys get let off at the end, it's easy to think that they're all sorry for what they did and tried to become better people... but life isn't like that. Since Lucius joined up of his own free will and continued with the Dark Arts even when Voldemort had disappeared, I find it quite believable that he never regretted anything he did.

The other side of his personality really conflicted with his support for the Dark Arts and Voldemort. It is clear in the books that he truly loved Narcissa and Draco and cared about them, so it makes sense that they were the cause of him trying to avoid Azkaban and have more care for his safety. The thoughts that he had about Narcissa when he hadn't said goodbye to her were particularly poignant. I liked the fact that he tried to keep her in the dark as much as he could - he'd made his choice but tried to stop it from affecting his family and causing them to worry. It makes me quite sad to think that he failed miserably. But I thought this side of his character was realistic as well, and seems like a good explanation for his actions at the end of the battle.

I thought that you wrote the speech very well. The dialogue seemed natural and consistent with the characters we see in canon at the same time, so well done with that. I liked the ending; the fact that you hid the identity of the man walking in the graveyard until the end left me guessing, and I felt satisfied with the conclusion that Draco seemed to arrive at.

I just noticed one typo in this piece:
"there is nothing Narcissa loves to do more than to threat about his safety." -- I think you mean 'fret' rather than 'threat'

Overall, this was a really enjoyable story. Your writing style is very readable and I found it interesting and realistic - well done!

Sian :)

Author's Response: My goodness, this review ... I am at a loss for words.This was wonderful to come home to, thank you so, so, so much! I'm really glad to hear you liked the story.
I am beyond happy to see that my attepmt at writing - and even simply understanding - Lucius Malfoy came across. You said everything I wanted my readers to understand. Lucius to me had always been an incredibly interesting character - I always saw him as the man that Voldemort wanted to be (when he first started the Death Eaters). His bloodline is the most pure of all wizard families, he came from a lovely home, he was extremely proficient at the Dark Arts, and beyond clever - and, along with his blood, he also had something else Voldemort could never have - love. Yet that wasn't really discovered by Voldemort until the forth and fifth book, and his attitude towards Lucius grew sour. I felt sorry for Lucius, really - he was a man who signed up to the Death Eaters when he was young and ready for anything, only to regret his decision later. That said, I find that the Malfoy's are quite romanticised. They had everything, and made sure everyone knew they had everything - in their eyes, they were immortal (the mere name, Malfoy, was immortal) - and yet, by the end of the books they were mortal, and in mortal danger, because of Lucius' brash and arrogant past. But I don't think he has the forsight to look back and regret - he always struck me as a man too proud, and I'm glad you see that too.
I'm glad you said that it explained his actions - this makes me very happy. He did fail with everything he tried to achieve, but in the end, Lucius was a great father and husband. That's really it, but I have no doubt his love for Draco would have rivalled Lily's love for Harry.
Oh, and I will definately fix that error - I knew that sentence sounded weird ...
Thank you so much again for your review. I'm afraid this response doesn't even do it justice. Thank you a million times over!
- Mahalia


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Review #8, by EmmaGranger the futurist.

29th July 2013:
Got a bit teary at the end. Good job. You don't read much about Lucius but I found this really explained his viewpoint well. Topic of redemption was well placed.
How do you feel about Lucius? I got mixed feelings of your opinion in here. You talked of him never being redeemed, yet he redeemed himself in Draco's eyes? Or for Draco?
Just curious ^-^

Author's Response: First off - thank you for the review. It was a hard story to write, as Lucius is a pretty difficult character to master, so I'm glad to see you liked it.
I'm really torn by your questions, but I'm going to answer them as best I can. Personally, I'm a bit of a Lucius fan-girl (maybe I should say Malfoy fan-girl, haha). I've very torn about how I see Lucius as a person, though. He is a strong character, and a loving father, but he was driven by greed and power - that was what brought him to the Death Eaters in the first place. Ultimately, these ambitions drove him (and he loved them), but really, beneath it all, no matter how he was towards people, he was driven by his family. I feel like he signed the Death Eater contract wanting nothing more than power, and then bam! family happened. Whoops. So his viewpoint changed - but it was too late. He sowed those seeds, and he had to watch them grow.
In the end, I don't think Lucius should have ever been redeemed. I found it surprising that JK said that Harry pardoned him - obviously she loved the Malfoy's as characters, and couldn't lock the protagonist away (I should say she grew to love the Malfoy's. The change from Lucius in book 2 to 5 is remarkable - his ambitions and personality alter slightly, and we meet a deeper character of Lucius in book 5). I feel like that if he was every redeemed, it would have been for his future family, and not himself. He was not a coward like Draco - at all. People confuse his cunning with cowardice, but Lucius never shied away from his responsibilities. So, no, I don't think he would have sought redemption.
Okay, wow, that came out way longer than I intended, haha. Thank you very much for the review and your questions - I enjoyed answering them!
Mahalia


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