Reading Reviews for Tie That Binds
  
2 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Mnemosyne_Morrigan Prologue

7th August 2013:
Minor characters, something for me ;)

Let me start with Regulus.

For now, he's described from Lydia's point of view and it seems he's a little to perfect. Not that Lydia thinks of him as a perfect man fo her, but the way she's describing him - handsome, intelligent, charming. Of course it's stated they didn't know each other too well, so it may be only ostensible. So I can't wait for some deeper insight on Regulus.

As for Lydia, it's good she doesn't strike as a Mary Sue-like character. I would even say we got more of Regulus here then Lydia's portrayal. But her opinions and emotions regarding marriage paint quite clear picture of her.

I like that put her at this kind of crossoroads. She doesn't think of herself as adult, there's a strong longing for childhood, for freedom. And yet she knows that she must follow this road. Maybe she's not prepared for it, but definitely willing to give her best. Even if it scares her.

Great advantage of you story is... winter setting! :) I adore winter backgrounds.

I have a doubt about sneaking around midnight without being noticed. A few times in the HP series midnight walks ended up being caught (when you don't have the invisibility cloak)

The language and style you use at times seems bipolar. There are those descriptions that are almost flawles and yet there are some sentences with grammar or punctuation mistakes. Like this one:
"One of his friends was going out with one of my friends so every now and again our two groups would mix but we only engaged in conversation about four or five times and those conversations were always very short."
It's not the worst sentence I've read, but it gave me a little headache.

But other than those few ruffed sentences, the style is good. I undesrtand that you're still working on your writing and improving, so keep that up! ;)

Author's Response: Hi there! Thanks for you review.
Yes, Lydia's opinion on Regulus now will not be quite accurate. But as the story goes on, Lydia will discover some of his flaws and as you say, gain a 'deeper insight' on him.

I'm glad you seem to like Lydia's character so far! Just like Regulus, Lydia's character and background will develop as the story continues. In the next chapter you will learn a big piece on her background.

I'm glad you commented on the setting! Winter has to be one of my favourite seasons and I enjoy writing about it.

Haha, yes I can agree that that may be a little bit far-fetched. I doubt Filch would really let a student get away with that. But it is a bit of fiction after all.

Gah! Sorry about that! I'll make sure to revise it. You know how it is when you're rushing to get your story updated and you let your eyes pass over those kind of errors.

Thanks for your feedback, I really appreciate it!


 Report Review

Review #2, by MidnightBlue_x Prologue

3rd August 2013:
This story sounds so intriguing- I'm a massive Regulus fan but there aren't many stories with him at least not with romance. I can't wait to read more of your story!

x Ely

Author's Response: Thanks so much! I'm quite a big Regulus fan myself. I think he's a really important character in the series and it does suck a bit that there aren't more stories about him. Thanks again for your review!

 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login