Reading Reviews for He Hopes
  
15 Reviews Found

Review #1, by caomoyl He Hopes

14th July 2013:
From the first line you had me engrossed. I didn't want to look away throughout the whole story. I love the way you used some of the smaller sentences set apart from the larger paragraphs. It gave them more effect and left an impact that worked really well.

I've never thought much about the process of Regulus leaving his house for the final time and how he got there. I had assumed that he would have just apparated but the way you wrote it makes a lot more sense since he was trying to hide and, as you mentioned, magic is tracable.

Throughout, I could really feel how hard it was for him not to be able to talk to Kreacher and how frustrating it could have been to know that Kreacher had no idea what was going on but still didn't ask questions!

Only thing I noticed that wasn't right was one missed word (I think) but you mentioned that in your AN!

Good job!

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Review #2, by Akussa He Hopes

13th July 2013:
Hi there!

This was a rather enjoyable story! I really like the way you presented Regulus. It's not a character we know much about and I think you did a great job in here because he feels real. The nuances of his character and emotions was believable and touching.

I like that Regulus chose a muggle way of travelling; it adds to the story and the dept of the character.

If I could add one small bit of constructive criticism, it would be about the format. The reading experience would be easier if you added spaces between the dialogues.

Great job though, I enjoyed it a lot!

Akussa for Gryffindor in the House Cup 2013 :)

Author's Response: Hello!

It's great to hear that you enjoyed this! I've never written Regulus before and I really enjoyed exploring him a bit for this, so I'm glad that that came across in the writing... He's such an interesting character...

Well writing about him just Apparating would've been kinda boring wouldn't it? haha. But I liked the idea of him being reduced to the level of Muggles here.

Hmmm, okay, I'll have a look at the format. I'm not entirely sure what you mean by dialogues though?

I'm glad you enjoyed this, and thankyou for leaving a review!

-Bethany


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Review #3, by starryskies55 He Hopes

13th July 2013:
I really really really really enjoyed this! It's something I have never thought about before, but something really interesting- Regulas did sacrifice everything to try to defeat the Dark Lord, but I had never thought about the stuff behind his decision, and it must have been torturous, so well done on portraying all that angst.

The muggle journey was really well written, I thought it was a great way to incorporate travel, and also it was a clever idea.

You had some wonderful turns of phrase in this as well; "dark-haired boy-man" as well as "shedding his childhood like a snake sheds its old skins? Regulus is a snake, has always been a snake. He lived as a snake, and he will die one too- playing for both sides."

That metaphor is wonderful, and its very powerful. You said you wrote this quickly, but I think its very very good!

Well done. :)

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Review #4, by FredWeasleyIsMyKing He Hopes

13th July 2013:
Hey!

I thought this was a really good one-shot and to say you got this out in such a small amount of time is awesome!

I thought the slight lack of coherence until the end was done on purpose as it seemed to fit in well with Regulus' character and what's going on with him in this. Maybe it wasn't intentional but it fit the story well.

I like how Regulus knows this is his last journey but he wants to do it as he has this greater purpose. You honestly wrote it so well!

One tiny tiny typo I did notice:

'He was a man who casually signed his life over to force too vast for him to escape' I think you need 'a force'.

This was really well written and I think a really inventive twist on the travel theme! Well done!

Lauren :)

Author's Response: Hello Lauren!

I'm so glad that you enjoyed this! Hehe I think maybe the lack of coherence was a mixture between Regulus' overwrought mind and mine?! I'd never really thought about Regulus that much before writing this, but he is such an interesting character...

Ooh thanks for pointing out the typo! I'll be sure to go and fix it.

Thank you for leaving this review; it was really lovely!

-Bethany


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Review #5, by Celtic_Dreamer7 He Hopes

13th July 2013:
This was an interesting read. I like how it seemed a bit gloomy but sprinkled with hope, you could really feel that as a character. I did have difficulty figuring out when this might have happened in the story - before he took the real locket or after - but it might just be me.

I like Regulas stories and this was one definitely in a time frame I haven't read yet. Good job. I find the most interesting things we write is when we are in a rush, lol.

Good luck to your house!

~Celtic~
Slytherin

Author's Response: Ooh I'm glad you picked up on the contrast between the despair and hope in this, I was hoping people would! I was under the impression that Regulus was killed by Inferi after he got the locket, so there wouldn't have been a return journey, but perhaps that still needs clearing up a bit...

I haven't read many Regulus stories, so I'm glad that you found it a bit original! To be honest, I don't really know where this idea came from, but I'm glad you enjoyed it, and thank you for this kind review!

-Bethany


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Review #6, by Dark Whisper He Hopes

13th July 2013:
Excellent job under such time constraints!

Your writing had such an angsty, dark tone and seemed dire. It was interesting that he didn't think himself a hero and even if no one ever knew what he did, he would know and that seemed to be enough. I think that is brilliant, considering most are extremely motivated by what others will think. But being who and what he is, that piece just doesn't matter... other than "Sirius would be proud." Wow, that speaks volumes. This one-shot goes wonderfully deep into his thoughts and his character. I think making this last journey of his incorporated into the travel theme is brilliantly different.

Again, great job on short notice.
DW

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Review #7, by KiwiOliver He Hopes

13th July 2013:
HC review-a-thon here :)

What an amazing idea for a travel themed story :)
I really like your portrayal of Regulus, he seems so real!

I like how he thinks of his brother - Sirius would be proud - I think it really adds to the authenticity :)

Some amazing imagery in this story as well :) I really like it!

Overall an awesome one-shot :)

Author's Response: Haha, it was about ten o' clock at night when I started writing this, and I was so desperate for ideas, I just started writing the first thing that came into my head! Anyway, I'm really glad that you enjoyed this, and that Regulus comes across well. I really enjoyed imagining this in my head, so it's good to hear that the imagery works too!

Thankyou for leaving a review!


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Review #8, by BluebirdBrigade He Hopes

13th July 2013:
Hello, here reviewing for the HC!

So this was a great entry for the House Cup, I really enjoyed reading it and your take on Regulus's thoughts and the fact that he knows the his death is imminent. You really captured the uncertainty of his thoughts that were meshed together with his hopes of survival. I felt really sympathetic towards Regulus and I know that he is often made out to be the cowardly, evil brother by many writers but I think he is a brave, selfless man from what I read in the HP books.

I love the way you used repetitive language throughout and kept reverting back to the fact that he hopes. It was really poignant for me and symbolised that despite his wishes, he is crashing towards fate and he knows that he will die. It was really sad and haunting to read that actually. I'm glad that he still hoped for his survival even when he believes and knows that it won't come. Hope is a pretty powerful thing.

I'm glad you talked about how Kreacher was his companion and the person he trusted above all else at this time. Kreacher is actually really devoted and faithful to his previous master so it's nice to see that the bond and the loyalty is returned. I loved the descriptions of his journey, which went along with theme of travel really nicely, and the way you used so many literary devices and made the sentences sound almost poetic. It was lovely.

I only saw a couple of grammatical mistakes, barely anything, which is a great feat considering your authors note and how you lost your previous story. This story is so well written that it seems like it was your first. I loved the way you wrote this, it was so interesting and a beautiful sad entry.

Maz x

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Review #9, by academica He Hopes

13th July 2013:
Hi there!

This was really lovely in its darkness and simplicity. I liked how you really explored all of the complicated emotions Regulus felt during this time. I can't imagine what it would be like to be taking a journey knowing that it will mark the end of your life. Regulus seems really mature here for his age, which I think is appropriate given the gravity of his situation. He's accepted that his actions have a purpose that is larger than him and ultimately necessary, and that enables him to be brave here.

Great work!

Amanda
Ravenclaw
House Cup 2013


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Review #10, by Debra20 He Hopes

13th July 2013:
Oh my dear, a Regulus story! Can you hear my squeal? Because I'm squeing right now haha

I have no idea why I love Regulus so much. He's hardly mentioned in the books, but every time I hear his name I feel the need to read something about him. Maybe it's his fabulous name or the story of his short life, but no matter the reason, I never pass up a chance to read about Regulus. Especially the moment of his life you chose as well. This is a defining time in his life and reading his thoughts, witnessing his struggle with what he once was taught to be and what he wants to be now, is pure pleasure. On this note I want to congratulate you for breathing life into this obscure character (because he is one of the minor characters of HP even if his part played in the First Wizarding War is a huge one) in such a short piece. His duality is portrayed with so much talent I'm astounded. I think my favourite line must be "Hope is Regulus' shadow". Hope is light. Hope brings joy and calm so having it compared to shadow makes for a magnificent description of how Regulus is actually feeling. He is torn between what his life has been until now, the purpose that he was taught to serve and the one he has created now. I think this single line defines him more than anything. He hopes, he is desperate to hope that a new day will come when all the wrongs he's done are forgiven and forgotten and the sun will rise for the Wizarding world again, because otherwise he is lost. And he knows it. Hope is all that remains to him.

Incredible depiction of Regulus. I loved everything about it and I'm so very happy I decided to read it!
Debra20

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Review #11, by typewriter He Hopes

13th July 2013:
I thought you hit on some amazing points with this story. I enjoyed how you delved so deeply into Regulus in his last moments before he sacrificed himself to stop a man that he had once blindly followed. I thought it was great how you highlighted his hope, but in a way that was dark and sad since we know how it all ended. My favorite aspect of the tale was how you wrote about his age. It's hard to believe he was so young when he met his fate.

Author's Response: Hey there! Thank you for reviewing!

I'm so glad that you enjoyed this! Regulus does have such a sad story, and enjoyed playing that up with his hope in the face of such a hopeless situation. His age was something that I looked up while writing this, and I shocked at it too, so I'm glad you picked up on that!


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Review #12, by AlexFan He Hopes

12th July 2013:
Well, knowing that Regulus was going to die at the end of his journey depressed me. Even though I don't know the character I still feel bad that he died but at the same time I'm so proud of Regulus and that he stood up to Voldemort.

I love go you gave a kind of brief overview of way Regulus was the way that he was. It hinted at what his childhood was like just a little bit (or maybe I'm overthinking).

Anyway, this was really good and I really enjoyed reading it!

Author's Response: Hello there!

I think Regulus has a pretty depressing life to be honest! It is sad that he had to die so young, but I tried to put a bit of a positive spin on it, in that at least he died for a good purpose. I'm glad that you liked the characterisation of him, and thank you for leaving a review!


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Review #13, by nott theodore He Hopes

12th July 2013:
Hello! I'm here reviewing for Gryffindor in the house cup :)

I haven't read many Regulus stories but I really enjoyed reading this one. He's such an interesting character and I liked your interpretation of him in this one-shot. I found myself feeling really sorry for him; his life was so short and ultimately so tragic. He never really had a chance, did he? It makes me realise how lucky Sirius was to escape the control of his parents, even though his life wasn't much better. The mention of Sirius here provided an effective contrast between the two brothers, and reminded me that Sirius never even knows how his brother died, or what he was trying to do. The tale of the two brothers (so to speak) is really devastating.

Some of the imagery you had in this one-shot was really lovely! "When did he slip from one to other, shedding his childhood like a snake sheds its old skins?" The allusions to snakes and the connection with Slytherin throughout were great, and I enjoyed your descriptions as well.

Another aspect I thought was very good was the detail you included, such as Kreacher being placed under a Disillusionment Charm to travel to the cave, and the difficulties he had paying for the train. Those sorts of things add depth to this story and really enhance it.

I thought the way you incorporated the travel theme was brilliant; the fact that Regulus had chosen to use Muggle travel on his way to do something to destroy Voldemort had a sort of defiance to it, I thought. Of course it would have been better for him to remain undetected, but the fact that he got to the cave with the aid of the people Voldemort seemed to hate the most was another act of resistance which highlighted Regulus' change of heart.

I noticed just one typo: "signed his life over to force too vast for him" -- to a force

Apart from that, you've got a really enjoyable and poignant one-shot here - well done!

Sian :)

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Review #14, by patronus_charm He Hopes

12th July 2013:
Hi Bethany! If this is what you can write while under pressure then I am blown away as I thought this was amazing! ♥

I think the thing which really made this one-shot be so awesome is the sentence structure of it. The use of short sentences sort of represented how short his life was and then having those interspersed with the longer ones every now and then really created something quite wonderful and it just flowed so brilliantly!

The moment you chose to write about is so poignant in my opinion but so brilliantly executed. Regulus seemed to be at terms with the fact that his life was about to end, there really wasnít anything which could be done to save him but the acceptance of it and the mental calm of it was really excellent. To do what he did, I would expect him to have that so your characterisation of him at this point was brilliant.

The use of travel in this one-shot was great because he was on a mission yet, again, itís almost this is the end of his life and heís about to travel to the next so you can interpret the theme in lots of ways. Kreacher was sort of his companion in bridging these two moments together and he appeared to be some sort of angel and it really was beautiful. I sort of saw him as a guardian too, and having that gave Regulus that little bit of hope of perhaps living which enabled him to do what he did.

I really loved this line ĎAnd he isnít drunk, but he is intoxicated in a way- intoxicated with the idea of conquering his fears, his foes. Intoxicated with hope.Ď ♥

The last few lines were really horrible in a brilliant way. I only say horrible due to what they made me feel but showing that it evoked such a powerful emotion in me is a really high-level of skill so donít worry about that. This conversation he had with the darkness could almost be seen as with his conscious and him battling away with the rights and wrongs of the world and it was a really clever end to the one-shot.

A brilliant piece of work, Bethany ♥

-Kiana

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Review #15, by magnolia_magic He Hopes

12th July 2013:
Hi! I'm here for the review-a-thon! And hey, you don't have anything to worry about with the way this one turned out...I thought it was fascinating! I really enjoyed reading it :)

I love your Regulus. He makes a great narrator because it's so interesting to get inside his head. He's sort of how I imagined he would be; he's got regrets about his life, but he's focused on the one thing he can still do that might start to make things right. I love that you included a few thoughts about his childhood, how he typically did what other people expected of him, and how those choices came back to haunt him at the end of his life. And I loved the line about him still feeling like a "snake." Because even though he is about to do something he feels is the right thing, he still isn't really making a public stand against Voldemort. He's still hiding. I love that you explored all that, and in so few words. Sometimes the most sparse language makes the biggest impact. Like that last line. "The darkness is saying nothing." It doesn't offer any answers or resolution, and it's a perfect melancholy note to end on :)

I really enjoyed this! You did a great job with it!

--Maggie

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