Reading Reviews for Anywhere but Here
  
13 Reviews Found

Review #1, by ReeBee Anywhere but Here

24th January 2014:
Hi!

Now, this was meant to be a congrats on becoming a validator present (not to mention, another amazing reason to procrastinate on homework and read your ever beautiful writing!)...But, time and RL got in the way :/

Anyway, this was so, so, sad, and yet calm and so so beautiful! I loved your writing in this! The emotion I could sense in the words made me want to curl up in a ball and cry :( So so good! I've always thought Lavender was an interesting character and this really explored every bit of her personality.

At the start I thought she had actually travelled to each of these places, but the twist at the end was so lovely in such a bittersweet way. I really loved it. And the reason she escapes into her own mind (because of her scars, etc.), was amazingly explained :)

And I really liked how the ending wasn't happy, because it shows us that sometimes, things will never heal. Not to mention, the war will sometimes change people forever, to a point where they can never even try to change back.

^^And that is why I don't read sad post war fics. It gets me thinking deeply, and believe me, that is something no one wants to see ;)

Anyway! Loved it! :D

-Curie :)

Author's Response: aww, thanks Curie!!

I'm sorry for writing a soppy post hogwarts angst fic. I seem to do a lot of them here. I just so interested in the reactions of students who are really too young to experience what they did and how they got through life without Voldemort hovering over them.

This turned out to be one of my favourite pieces i've written. I meant for it to be a lot brighter than how it turned out, really wanted her to be travelling and that was how she was healed, but then... well you read what happened. I got another idea while writing and then shifted my focus and I got a woman who couldn't deal with life afterwards.

I like Lavender. She's strange though because she comes off as quite frivolous in the series, but then there are moments you get that you wonder if she's more. I mean, i'm just re-reading Goblet of Fire and she's one of the very few students who stays behind to help Hagrid, Harry and Co with rounding up the Blast Ended Skewts. She stayed for the battle in the end as well. It makes me really interested in her anyway.

Yah, endings aren't always happy. Sometimes, things don't change. Sometimes they get worse, sometimes they stay the same. It isn't real if every person gets a happy ever after. Which makes me sad because i'd rather write in a happy ending where she finds the light, but so far, this isn't happening for her.

Thank you so much for your review and I appreciate all your comments. They were fabulous!

zayne


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Review #2, by teh tarik Anywhere but Here

29th July 2013:
Hello Zayne!

What a gorgeous story. It's terribly sad; there's so much melancholy in this fic and that really tugged at my heartstrings. I love Lavender fics, as long as she is portrayed with compassion and depth, and your Lavender was definitely a very rounded character. You've done a great job writing her voice, and really accentuating that hopeless vulnerability about her and the emotional and psychological scars of her life, along with the physical injuries sustained in the war. It does make sense that she would have such an overwhelming desire for escape, and the extent of her imagination and escapism is both tragic and hopeful. Somehow the scars and the war have broken her open, broken her out of her tiny contented world of lipstick and friends and new robes and thrust her into a reality that is so vast and alien. It's quite symbolic that she coops herself up in a flat full of books and at the same time dreams to be far away. There's a delicious complexity and duality to her situation, and you've done a fantastic job showing that.

Your descriptions and use of imagery were gorgeous. There was such a gorgeous sweeping view of things (pyramids, great wall of China etc.), and occasionally there would be close-ups on tiny details (the smells of perfume and curried lamb, the sand clinging to skin). How real it must have felt to LAvender, and how deeply immersed she must have been in her dreams and imaginings to be able to feel with such intensity. And at the same time, I do get the nagging sensation that she's possibly losing touch with reality, just a little.

I love the inclusion of Parvati here. She's a contrast to Lavender, being strong and whole, but supportive as well. If Lavender is going to be fine, and I like to think that she will be, then it will be partly because of Parvati's support.

A beautifully written oneshot, Zayne! I loved this :)

-teh

Author's Response: Hey Teh!

Thank you so much for this review! It was so lovely to read and so very nice. I've never really thought too much about Lavender before writing this. I've read a few stories about her and found them interesting, but I never felt the need to write about her. Until this and I realized the depth she could have. It was interesting to write this and explore her as she is definitely losing touch with reality. She's escaping it and with every book she reads the more she slips away from what is real and falls into this dream word of hers.

I hope she'll be okay one day.I hope that the support of Parvati helps her but I don't have the answer to that now. Right now she's still slipping and nothing Parvati does will help. Not now. Perhaps later though. :) Thank you so much for you wonderful review teh! It's made me squee with joy every time i read it.


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Review #3, by ohmymerlin Anywhere but Here

28th July 2013:
Hey, Zayne!

This was AMAZING! I had an inkling that it was Lavender but I couldn't imagine her travelling like she said but then it was just her imagination and just -- wow!

You wrote this so amazingly! I just loved all the descriptions of the places and Lavender's frustration at being a part of the war, it was just beautiful!

I really, really loved this one-shot, it was written so well and I didn't notice any spelling mistakes or grammatical errors, so kudos!

I also loved how you juxtaposed Parvarti and Lavender, I could really see Lavender being like that, especially after the war.

So yeah, I absolutely loved this story! I'm glad that I read it! :)

10/10

- Kayla. :D

Author's Response: Hi Kayla! Thank you so much for your lovely review! I'm really pleased you enjoyed this so much and that you could imagine this story so well. I really wanted the reader to be 'in it' alongside Lavender so it actually seems like these places were real and being travelled to. It was so vivid for Lavender that she couldn't even distinguish what was real or not and that's what I wanted for the reader as well. i'm glad you got that. Thanks lovely for the wonderful review!

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Review #4, by Faith100z Anywhere but Here

26th July 2013:
Hi!

This was just so gorgeous. I'm a sucker for anything that shows more of Lavender than what was presented in the books. I thought this was completely brilliant. The awesome description had me believing that she really had been to those places and then the part where you find out it's all in her head and her books--it makes your heart break for her. Your description was so great too. I felt like I could imagine her in those places really easily. There were so many lines throughout which were really beautiful, but obviously really sad at the same time. The whole thing was so well-written, amazing job!

Author's Response: Hiya Faith! I'm so pleased you enjoyed this! I'm definitely of the same mind when it comes to showing Lavender in a different light. I think it was a little unfortunate that we saw such a shallow look at her and although that was part of her I think there might have been more if she had the chance to develop as a character. I'm so pleased you enjoyed the description, that's the most important bit of this one-shot too as the reader needs to be in those places alongside Lavender so that the twist in the end actually comes off as a twist. So i'm really pleased that it worked for you. Thank you so much for your lovely review.

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Review #5, by HollyStone73 Anywhere but Here

13th July 2013:
This was so sad but written so well! I admit I scrolled down to the end to see who it was you were writing about before I got there. LOL! I haven't read very many Lavender stories but this one just made me wish that it wasn't so short. I found myself wanting to know more about what was going to happen with her. It was so descriptive that I had for a moment thought that she actually visited them. Very well written. I enjoyed reading it!!

Author's Response: Thank you so much Holly for choosing to read this story! I'm pleased that it seems that the twist that it's all in her mind seemed to come to a surprise to most people. I always feel like i'm being obvious when I try to keep things on the down low if you know what i mean ;). I'm been toying with turning it into something more or writing another story with Lavender in it as I really like her characterization and I think there is plenty more to be explored with her. Thanks again for the review!

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Review #6, by ginerva_molly_weasley Anywhere but Here

13th July 2013:
Oh this is so sad. I can't believe how sad you made this!

I loved the ending most of all because of Parvati and how Lavander has been affected by the war. I loved how all of Lavender's travelling was in her mind so this helped me to really connect with Lavender. She is completely destroyed by the battle as she is a war child and this is about helping her to get over her past and move on to her future.

The travelling for her was almost symbolic too as part of her healing which I genuinely loved. I loved the fact that she seemed to look to China and I also loved the interaction between Parvati and Lavender with Parvati being prepared to go with her friend on actual travelling which showed their true friendship.

Well done on this!

GinevraMollyPotter
Slytherin

Author's Response: I hope Lavender gets better. It would be so hard to get better after that as there are so many demons to fight. So many nightmares and Lavender was attacked by Fenrir. Mutilated by him and probably almost died. Those are things someone would have issues getting past and through and for Lavender her mode of survival in the real world is escaping. It's not a good way to live obviously. Not for long period of times.

I'm really pleased you enjoyed this and liked the writing and the symbolism of it. It was interesting to write and explore this moment in Lavenders life. Thank you so much for the review!


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Review #7, by Beeezie Anywhere but Here

13th July 2013:
As soon as I saw this, I knew I needed to read it. First, because you wrote it, and whatever you said in your A/N, I am typically pretty impressed with what you write. Second, because it's about Lavender, and I find fics about Lavender to be really interesting in general.

I do understand what you mean when you say it felt rushed - there are definitely points that feel a bit less polished from what I usually see from you, I agree. There were a lot of little grammatical things that I haven't seen in your more recent things that I've read (which were, admittedly, awhile ago), and there were occasionally adjectives that didn't quite fit right. I also did feel like the end was a bit rushed - I would have liked something a bit less definitive than "I was going to be fine," you know?

At the same time, I think you might be underselling yourself. Overall, your writing was lovely and the details you provided painted a very vivid picture of what Lavender was thinking about. I also liked that you leaned on them so heavily to help describe her emotional state - it definitely illustrated how helpless she felt.

Honestly, though, I think the thing that impressed me most was how you created such a strong, plausible post-war voice overall for Lavender in this story, which is something I always love to see and also always admire in a writer. She's a character with a lot of hidden depths, I think, and you really took them on and did something with them.

The friendship between Lavender and Parvati was also lovely to see, and I think you did a terrific job with it. They were clearly very close in the books, but I don't think it gets explored very often in fics because neither of them is an especially popular character. However, especially when you're talking about recovery from the sort of trauma Lavender experienced, it makes perfect sense that she would need a friend to help pull her through it.

Again, I do see what you mean, and I do think that there are a couple parts you could improve a bit, which I already noted above. Still, though, this was a lovely story, and I think you did a great job with it.

House Cup 2013 - Ravenclaw

Author's Response: Hey Branwen,

I do agree with you, i wrote this in a rush and i know it can get tightened up a bit. Especially grammatically.

I'm a little shocked that you like Lavender stories because it seems that most people don't really like her as a character. I do enjoy her and I think she acts in very normal teenagerish ways so there isn't really a base for how much some people dislike her. To be honest, many teenage girls can be a little overbearing with first boyfriends. I think i like her best post war though because there is a lot to explore. Also, if you think about it, she was part of the DA, she stayed to fight - there is a lot of depth, as you say, in her character that she doesn't get credit for.

The end, 'i was going to be fine' doesn't necessarily mean she's going to be fine. In her eyes she's going to be 'fine' but the only reason she thinks that is because she's escaping into her fantasies again. She's "in" China and not having to deal with the reality of her depression, the reality of her post war self. Her mode of survival is escaping. It's being in another place so she can live to be the person she believes she is. It's a bit of an irony that she says she'll be fine because she is anything but that and will not be fine till she learns to try to cope with reality. But I think I do understand where you are coming from with wanting something that's sort of less clear in a way.

Past all that though and the feeling of it being too rushed I'm pleased that you enjoyed the details and the writing itself. That's always such a compliment coming from you as i've always been a little in awe of how you write. I really like trying to develop a voice for my character and post war Lavender seemed perfect to get this story across. There is so much to explore with her and so many emotions that are underneath the surface that I can't imagine how hard it would be to deal with the after effects of war. The demons and the terror of thinking you could die from Fenrir.

Yah, i like how Parvati turned out in this story. She is trying to hard to be that rock for Lavender, she cares for her so much and needs Lavender to survive this. But she doesn't realize that she's a little out of her depth and that she's lost Lavender already. In a way too Parvati herself makes it hard for Lavender to grow because Parvati has seemingly gotten past the war. She still is 'perfect' in Lavender's eyes and she sees this gap between her and Parvati and instead of making her push to get better she falls even further.

Anyway, enough of my rambling. I'm really pleased that you enjoyed this and as soon as my holiday is over I'm going to go back and try to tighten this story up.

-zayne ;)


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Review #8, by marauderfan Anywhere but Here

13th July 2013:
Wow, this was really wonderful! It's so sad and haunting. At first I thought Lavender was just running from place to place because she was trying to get away from her memories from the war, and it made sense that she'd do that. But then you revealed the plot twist and it made it even sadder. The contrast between Lavender before the war, all put together with big dreams she could accomplish, and Lavender post-war falling apart and clinging to fantasies, was really well written.

Parvati was great, I felt so badly for her. All she's doing is trying to help and it must be so frustrating for her that she can't get through to her - she can tell Lavender needs help, but Lavender is only pushing her away.

This was really well written, great job!

Author's Response: Hey dear! Thank you so much for choosing this story to review! I appreciate your words and i'm pleased that you liked how this was done. I really enjoy delving into these type of stories and I was quite worried with this one that I wasn't quite getting where I wanted to go and exploring the idea of reality vs. dreams and trying to show how deep Lavenders fantasies were. To her, escaping reality was the only mode of survival to her. She has nothing else to hang onto and so she goes to places that she can still be what she thinks she is. She'll have to go through some major growth and change to be able to see the world in front of her.

Yah, Parvati cares for her and wants to be that rock that Lavender needs but she's way out of her depth and hasn't realized that she's lost Lavender already. She can't help her at the moment even though she wants to be there. She doesn't realize too that her very presence can hinder Lavender because Parvati, in Lavender's eyes, has everything that Lavender desires - the ability to move on, the ability to still be beautiful, to have people want her and Lavender has just fallen through the cracks. To an extent she doesn't even want to admit that there is an issue. As long as she has her books she thinks she's going to be alright.

Thanks for the review!!
-zayne


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Review #9, by maskedmuggle Anywhere but Here

13th July 2013:
Hey!

I thought this was such a powerful reminder of the long-lasting effects of war.. and how it completely changed many people's lives, including Lavender. Usually you'd expect it to be someone not being able to move on because someone they love is dead, but Lavender's perspective here was really refreshing and eye-opening. I really loved how you contrasted what she was like before - perfect with what she was like now - marred by scars, and the idea of how Lavender didn't feel like she was herself anymore.

I think it's a clever idea that someone would want to escape into big dreams and into places to avoid being anywhere but where she was. All of Lavender's emotions and inconsolable pain was really well conveyed.. I really felt like I could feel and understand her pain. I also loved how you portrayed Lavender and Parvati and how their friendship was still so strongly intact. A nicely written story, so well done! :)

- Charlotte/maskedmuggle
House Cup 2013 Ravenclaw

Author's Response: Hi Charlotte! Sorry it's take so long to reply! HC and RL have been so mental!

I've always been pulled in by the after affects of tragedy and war. I don't know why but i love exploring those moments when people's way of living is being ripped away from them. It's those really raw moments where we see what a person is made of. For Lavender, it destroyed her own reality. It ripped her grasp on it away because everything she's ever known is gone. She doesn't have what she used to, she has these memories she has to deal with, the knowledge that she almost died, and these scars and the only way for survival, for her, is to escape. It would be hard to move one when everything has been ripped away. Lavender hasn't been able too and it can't be easy either to see her best mate apparently move on either. To be able to put the memories behind and Lavender seems to internalize that and think that something is wrong with her if she can't get over this too. So she just hides and escapes from the world that has been so cruel to her, to chase her dreams and to really, become those dreams, because she doesn't know a better way to be anymore. It's only in these dreams she can be who she thinks she is.

Anyway thank you so much for your thoughtful and kind review! I'm really pleased you enjoyed the read and found this little story so powerful :)
-zayne


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Review #10, by DracoFerret11 Anywhere but Here

13th July 2013:
Hello there! This is DarkRose from Ravenclaw on the forums here to review for you for the House Cup 2013! :D So, let's go over things:

Plot: Wow! When I finally realized the twist (about two lines before I read it), I was so shocked! Great job working that in! This story was both very beautiful and very sad. I felt so sorry for Lavender and I think your take on her escapism is very realistic. The ending where she went back to her fantasies was so perfect. Wonderfully done.

Characterization: Lavender's character is one that I usually don't like, but I think you did a terrific job of writing for her. She was so pitiful that I WANTED to pity her and help her. Her escapism made her very realistic and sad and touching. I really liked that. I also felt bad for Parvati who really just wants to help, but actually can't yet. So sad.

Descriptions: Absolutely BEAUTIFUL descriptions of the places that Lavender "visited." Some of the best I've read this competition. I could really see them and smell them and hear them. As I mentioned, I really believed her until RIGHT before you revealed the twist. I loved that you worked in things about how she used to only care about her appearance and at first those mentions seemed so trivial and then, WHAM, the realization. Great job!

Emotions: I love that Lavender is so broken, but she isn't even handling it yet. That's very realistic. I could imagine a real person handling PTSD in a similar way. I felt sorry for her.

Interactions: I felt bad that Parvati wants to help so much but can't yet and is getting frustrated. I can really imagine that she WOULD be frustrated. The situation can seem maddening, but she wanted to be a good friend so badly. I loved how she kept trying with Lavender, even when she wasn't getting through.

You did an awesome job with this! Congratulations! I was really impressed. Good luck with the House Cup!

--Emily

Author's Response: Hey Emily!

Thank you so much for choosing this story to read and having such nice things to say about it!

I'm really pleased you liked the plot. I'm always worried that i'm blatantly obviously when i'm working a twist in and so it's shocked me that most people didn't see the book thing coming.

It must have been hard for Lavender to deal with her new life. Everything she'd relied on before, her sense of identity and her sense of what reality was was stripped away from her. She no longer has that base to stand on so the only way, to her, for survival is to escape. Escape somewhere else where there is still the beauty that she desires and the big dreams and she doesn't have to worry as much about her scars. It would be a harrowing experience to live through that and I don't think everyone would get through it fine. Like you said, something akin to PTSD.

I'm sorry for Parvati too because she does care, she wants to be there for Lavender. Wants to be that rock and anchor for her but she's way out of her depth. She's lost Lavender long ago and she doesn't even know it yet. It wouldn't be easy for Lavender either, to see her best mate get on with life. She'd be left wondering at one point why she couldn't as well. That would also lead her to just escape the world because perhaps she sees that she can't see herself doing what Parvati has done.

I'm really pleased you liked the descriptions of these places. I've only ever been to China and every other country I wrote her going I was just creating the atmosphere from pictures or from stories i've heard told about them. I had felt that they were lacking in depth though or that i was skimming over it.

Thank you for all your compliments and lovely words about this story!

-zayne


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Review #11, by Violet Gryfindor Anywhere but Here

13th July 2013:
Oh wow, what have you done here? It's one of those stories that kills a bit of one's soul (in an entirely good way, of course). I had a sneaking suspicion earlier in the story that something wasn't quite right, that Lavender's travels didn't match up with the kind of life she seemed to have at home, but even when I came to the part about the woman in Egypt on a quest, I didn't question it - I wanted it to be as real as Lavender did. It's the one thing that Pavarti can't understand - even if Lavender was to go out and travel the world, she would still be scarred, people would still stare at her, and outside of England, I doubt they would know what her scars meant. Lavender's dreams are more real to her because they allow her to escape what she is to become what she was. She still has the big dreams, but now there's only dreams.

I can't even make this review make sense, I'm floored by this story, the way that Lavender's narrative brings readers so deeply into the fantasy that we emerge not knowing what's real and what isn't. The world of Parvati feels unreal while Lavender can describe all of the places of her dreams so vividly, right down to the way each place sounds, smells, and feels. It's painful to see her struggle when she's pulled out of these dreams by people who really can't understand - even those who were present at the Battle wouldn't be able to understand Lavender's trauma. I think you even imply that she's lost her arm, or at least the ability to use it - I mean, why has she been left alone like this, the one who has fallen between the cracks, pitied and looked down upon by everyone (even Parvati to a degree). The world has turned away from her, and she turns away on both it and herself.

Her voice in this story is amazing - you capture the essence of Lavender and extend into what she could have become in the aftermath of the battle. It's terrifyingly realistic when I think back to the nature of the battle, and I can't help wondering why JKR chooses Lavender as Greyback's victim - perhaps it was because of her old vanities and silliness. There are still hints of her old manner in this story, but they're now heavily overlain by bitter sarcasm; the image of the fashionable Lavender sipping iced tea is in equally sharp contrast to the two Lavenders of this story, the adventurer and the dreamer. Although she claims that she's changed, she still desires the same things, especially bigness - not necessarily to be "big" but to experience big things and be in big places. But this desire is realized in the most horrifying of ways with the Battle of Hogwarts. Imagine having one's dream come to life like that - it would destroy one's mind, just as it does for Lavender.

Ugh, your portrayal of Lavender and her dreams is extraordinary - painful, but beautifully and cleverly executed. It's a fantastically original, though tragic approach to the travel prompt. I'm definitely going to add this to my favourites list because it's just so well-written and moving. Incredible work!

Author's Response: So, i've been so blown away by this review that i've been avoiding responding to it. I don't know why, but it was just so nice and i'm shocked that I was able to pull this whole thing off. It was such a vague idea I started with and as i wrote it grew into this .

I love how much of this one-shot you've really got. It was really interesting to dig into Lavender because she seemed so flat and shallow in the books. This is why I like fanfiction so much, it allows you to dig into the tiny corners of it.

What I loved writing about this was trying to make her fantasies real to her. they had to be otherwise this whole thing wouldn't work at all. It wouldn't work for Lavender either. She needs a place where she isn't herself and a slim hope that one day things will be fine. A place where that she won't have to worry about her scars. It doesn't matter to her that that slim hope comes with dreams and fantasies. It's only there that she has freedom. She's fallen into them so much that they truly are real to her. Far more real that her flat and the stale sense of disappointment. Whatever she has in her books, every time she enters them, she's experiencing it. It's lost the dream, she only has her reality.

She's lost the use of her arm, the scars ran so deep that it's basically useless. Another deep reminder of everything she's lost and how she was forced to look into her future and realized that she couldn't handle it. Not with the mind frame she had grown to rely on before the war anyway. So she turns to this dream because anything else would be torment. (though she's tormenting herself again and again with every dream she falls into, she just doesn't realise that). I cannot imagine what it would be to deal with the after effects of scars and war. You know? I've tried to realise it in a really horrifying manner were a person has sunk so low that they may never climb out again. It's sad that she's alone and has almost no one. Part of that is her own choice, but part of that is also just slipping through the cracks of the system. It happens to too many soldiers in RL as well and it makes me sad to think of someone having to deal with this alone. She lets Pavarti in to a very small extent, but as you said, even Pavarti can never understand and in her own way looks down on her. In my mind, Lavender never gets better. I don't think every character would have a happy ever after. Lavender is one of those that will forever be tormented. I tried to show that there that even with Pavarti she still slips back to her own reality. That reality is the only thing she'll ever know.

Thank you SO much for your review and i'm sorry for long it took me to respond. Every time i tried I didn't feel like i had to words to try and explain it. I really appreciate though you insightful review.


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Review #12, by LilyEPotter Anywhere but Here

13th July 2013:
Hi! Here for the House Cup review!

The twist in this story was done very well. It took me a bit to realize that all the traveling had been done in Lavender's mind instead of for real. You also did well in showing how easy it can be to retreat into your mind when you simply can't face reality.

Great story!

Author's Response: Yah, i'm not usually good with twists and I always feel like i'm being blatantly obviously with them but it seems like with most of the reviews i've got for this haven't really seen it coming. I'm really pleased you enjoyed this! I can't imagine what it would be like to be in a war and survive it. It's so far removed from my own experience but the effect of it I can try to see it as being harrowing. Where sometimes the only choice you have of survival is to retreat into your mind because that's the only way escape your demons. Thank you SO much for choosing this story to review, i appreciate it a lot!

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Review #13, by Athene Goodstrength Anywhere but Here

12th July 2013:
Ooh, now this one kept me on my toes! Every time I thought I had a handle on it, something new came up to challenge me. This story grew deeper and more complex with every paragraph!

The way she tells smaller stories about other people in each place confused me at first - why, if she was in all these amazing places, were we hearing about these other people? And then I thought that she wants to be a spectator, and not actually be involved in a fantastic story of her own - which makes sense, considering the trauma she's been through, and is a nice contrast with the first person narrative. I was reminded a little of The Great Gatsby at that point - having a first person narrator who's more interested in telling other people's stories!

Once I realised it was all in her mind, it struck me as really sad that even in her own fantasies, Lavender is an outsider, watching other people have adventures.

I really felt her disappointment when Parvati takes the book away - it was a shock to me! But it explained a lot. Instead of Lavender being this almost manic, wild traveller with a thirst to be constantly moving, the poor girl is deeply depressed and has lost her grip on reality. I feel pretty sorry for Parvati in all of this, to be honest! She's so supportive and loving, that in Lavender's mind she has become a strong wall... But she doesn't realise she's lost Lavender already.

I very much liked a couple of lines in this - these two stood out:

"The eyes of the people there never seemed as hard or as hollow" - this really made me think about the fact that the whole wizarding community in Britain is traumatised to some extent, just like Lavender.

And the line about a memory sticking in her mind like glass - a strong image! I really liked that line.

I did notice that there appears to be a lack of commas in many sentences, rendering some of them a little clumsy and difficult to read/understand. This story may benefit from you reading it out loud, just to see where it needs other punctuation or slightly more natural wording. Also, I noticed that you spelled Parvati's name 'Pavarti' throughout. But that's all!

I really enjoyed this - I haven't really read any Lavender stories, and this was such an interesting take on the travel theme! Well done :)

Athene xo

Author's Response: Hey Athene! Thank you so much for choosing this story to read! I really appreciate it!

I loved reading how you responded to each change in the story. How everything was challenging you on another level. I love those type of stories where the narrator isn't saying their story but fixated on the lives around them. It makes it so interesting because you learn a lot about them based on what they are observing. It's like two stories in one. Anyway, that's completely off topic!

I can't imagine what it'd be like to go through a war. To experience such turmoil and to come out scared and hurt where you can't chase the demons away that are grabbing at your wrists. It would be a harrowing experience and for some reason i've always been drawn to it. Lavender's story is especially interesting because we know so little of her. Yes, we're annoyed at her in the books for her Won-won obsession and her seemingly shallow life but she stayed and fought. She was part of the DA. Then suddenly everything in the war happened. She was attacked and suddenly she can't cope. She can't be anything because what she relied on before - her good looks, her want of big things - is gone. Her base for reality has slipped because of that because everything she relied on before she can't now. Hence why she falls into this worlds. The only places that she feels like she can live. She has these dreams and at the moment she can't even tell what's real or not anymore.

Parvati (thanks for correcting me with the name, no idea WHY I did that but i'm mortified!) was an interesting character to write. She's trying to help, she loves her friend, but she's so out of her depth. She doesn't know what her friend needs or how to give it to her. She wants so much to be the lifeboat but she won't ever be because Lavender has slipped so far from her grasp.

Thank you so much for your review and being the first person to review this story! I had begun to think that i'd actually completely messed up on this story. I'm still not massively happy with it but i'm really happy that you got it and felt that it had complexity! Thanks so much!!


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