Reading Reviews for RÍve Voyager
15 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Fonzzx RÍve Voyager

17th April 2014:
All the tears. Brilliant!

Author's Response: Thank you so much! ♥

 Report Review

Review #2, by magnolia_magic RÍve Voyager

27th July 2013:
Oh wow. I am so happy I read this. Haha, I'm still recovering from it, so I'll try to leave a coherent review :D

I was absolutely fascinated by the way you wrote Alice. There's just something about her that draws me to her. I love that you've left her mind basically empty, but there's all this emotion surging beneath the surface. Her wants and dreams are still there, but she doesn't know how to connect them to reality. And that connection with Frank. I just found that so beautiful. All the lines where she wanted to reach out to him but still had no idea who he just proves that love can defy reasoning sometimes, and I love that idea :)

I was just heartbroken during the scene when she wakes up from her dream and cries because she can't remember it. That was such a powerful moment, because I can't bear to even imagine what that must be like. You did such a wonderful job of painting that picture.

And the dreams themselves were very well done. I loved the glimpses of happier times, and it was a relief to know that the memories were still there. But at the same time, it was even more tragic to know that it's all right at her fingertips and she can't access it.

The only CC I can think of is related to Augusta's dialogue. There are times when she sounds a little more casual than I think she'd be (like when she calls Frank and Alice "you guys"). Maybe another look at that would be helpful?

That last line was incredibly powerful. It seems like a small thing, just saying her son's name, but for a woman who hasn't even formed words in years, it's a huge victory. How Neville must have felt when he heard that! I loved Alice's maternal instincts coming through whenever she thought of Neville, even if she didn't know who to attach them to. It made the ending so much better, a quiet triumph.

I really loved this! You did an incredible job!


Author's Response: Hey, Maggie!

haha, thank you for all your lovely comments! They really mean a lot to me, they do! :')

I think someone else already pointed that out and I will change that. Maybe in a couple of weeks (because of RL) but I will fix that up! Thanks for pointing it out, though!

Thank you so much for this amazing review! You're far too kind! ♥

- Kayla. :)

 Report Review

Review #3, by MrsJaydeMalfoy RÍve Voyager

26th July 2013:
*Sobs* Kayla!! :( / :) You've got my emotions all confused!!

When I read the first line or two, I thought this was going to go somewhere completely different. But when I read 'pale bed sheets' I remembered that you said you had written a story about Neville's parents remembering their lives, and I immediately thought to myself, "My emotions aren't ready for this!" :P

This was a really beautiful and heart-wrenching piece! I really enjoyed seeing the different adventures that Alice and Frank went on, and I think they flowed seamlessly with the rest of the story. You actually took me to those places, while still gently reminding me that we were actually sitting in the hospital, dreaming.

The way Alice kept getting frustrated with herself for not being able to remember really broke my heart, but I think it was very realistic and you portrayed it very well. And I LOVE that, even though she can't remember, she still realizes that she's got some kind of connection with Neville and Frank.

The ending was bittersweet. I was SO happy that she remembered Neville's name, but I also knew that the remembrance would be short-lived. :(

All in all, this was a beautifully written, heart-wrenching one shot, that was a very unique spin on the "travel" theme. Wonderful job!! ♥

Author's Response: haha, sorry, Jayde! I don't mean to make your emotions all confused! (Totally did but shh...) :p

I'm so glad you enjoyed it! It was so hard to write (mostly because of the time constraint and the other thousand and million things on my mind :p) so hearing that you loved it really makes me go all warm and fuzzy! :')

Thank you so much for this beautiful review, it really made my day. Thank you! ♥

 Report Review

Review #4, by HollyStone73 RÍve Voyager

13th July 2013:
This was so incredibly sad! I just wanted to cry my way through it. I love that Alice have moments of clarity and memories! I love the way you showed through her memories details about their life. I also love that Augusta came to see them before she went into hiding. The jumbled up of the dreams was a bit confusing, but I don't think it detracted from anything. I imagine that was what you were going for. Overall this was very well written and a good read. Well done!

Author's Response: Everyone seems to be saying it's sad! I guess I thought I'd be the only one who thought that so it's a bit strange for me! :p

I wanted this one-shot to be confusing, so yeah, that was intentional haha!

Anyway, thank you for the review!

 Report Review

Review #5, by Beeezie RÍve Voyager

13th July 2013:
Oh, god, this was heartbreaking.

I opened a lot of stories in my browser at once and have just been going through them one by one, so I didn't initially remember who this was about. Once I got to the mention of Neville, though, I'd figured it out, and that was a good confirmation.

You interpreted travel in a different way than I think most people did, and I'm glad, because what you made from it was really terrific. I thought that you did a great job at capturing Alice's mind from several different perspectives, and I found the fact that you almost switched her dreaming and waking selves to be really interesting. Most of the time she spent awake is clearly spent in a fog, albeit a somewhat frustrated one - she's only barely aware of her former life, when she even remembers it at all. In her dreams, however, it's a completely different story, which I found fascinating.

Similarly, I really loved the way you explored her relationship with Frank both pre- and post-St. Mungo's. That's something I've actually always kind of wondered about - they were physically together, but they were so disconnected from reality that I've never really been sure how much they actually communicated or were even really aware of the other. You showed a shadow of what they used to have, which fit perfectly with the situation, IMO.

And, of course, the ending actually brought tears to my eyes. It was so heart-warming to see her manage that one word, but it was also very clear (or at least, it seemed this way to me!) that this was not a step toward recovery, not really - it was just one moment in time where she managed to get a bit of a grip on reality. Poor Neville.

I do have a couple suggestions, though.

First, while I loved that you actually depicted the beginning of the torture that ultimately drove Alice and Frank insane - it was a bold choice, but one that fit well with this story - I felt like you could have done a bit better with the dialogue around it.

Second, I felt like your description during her memories could have been a little stronger. Because there's clearly such a disconnect between awake-Alice and asleep-Alice, it would have been nice to see that reflected not only in her dialogue but also in her perception of the world as a whole.

Overall, though, this was a lovely, if heartbreaking, story. Excellent job.

House Cup 2013 - Ravenclaw

Author's Response: Hello!

I did that as well and it took me so long to figure out some stories out so I would open ANOTHER tab and work it out haha! So many tabs! D:

I'm glad you liked my interpretation of travel! It was one of the first things that popped in my mind!

I'm glad to hear that you thought it was fascinating! I really struggled writing this story so seeing all your lovely compliments makes me so happy! :)

I love the Frank/Alice pairing, so I'm glad that I've done it justice! :D

Aw, thank you so much. I absolutely loved writing those last few lines! :D

I'll take those tips on board when I revise it after I finish school! I don't have much time at the moment, but I will have some soon so I'll change things around after! Thanks for the tips!

Thank you for this lovely review!

- Kayla. :)

 Report Review

Review #6, by purplepotter77 RÍve Voyager

13th July 2013:
Here for the HC review-a-thon!

I loved this. It was so beautiful and sad but hopeful at the same time. The part where people are talking about Neville and she doesn't know who they're talking about just makes me so sad. I also love how she feels a connection to Frank, but at the same time, she doesn't know what it is or why it's there.

I loved the little bits of Frank and Alice's life before and during the war that you inserted. Alice, Frank, and Neville before Alice and Frank get tortured are such a perfect, lovely little family, and knowing what happens to them later makes me so, so sad.

This story was so bittersweet, and I loved the part at the end where Alice finally knows who Neville is! The scene where she looks in the mirror is also very touching. The way you made all their emotions and memories come out in this story is wonderful.

It was really a pleasure to read Alice and Frank's beautiful story!

Author's Response: Hello!

Thank you so much for your compliments! They really mean a lot to me! ♥

It was a very bittersweet one-shot, I do admit. I kept getting sad and then happy again. :p

Anyway, thank you for this lovely review and I'm so sorry for taking an age to respond!

- Kayla. :)

 Report Review

Review #7, by ShadowRose RÍve Voyager

13th July 2013:
Hello there!

I'm completely blown away by this one-shot. You've taken such a simple theme, travel, and morphed it into these ongoing trips through time and space to all of these different major moments in Alice's life, all of which happen within her dreams. It has a very Inception-esque feeling to it.

I love Alice's character - she seems so down-to-earth and real, and she's struggling so much to regain contact with the outside world again, and she has no idea what's happening when she wakes up because she can't remember her dreams that explain everything, but she feels these small connections, and ugh - it's beautiful.

Frank and Alice are adorable; they make all these cute jokes between one another and are just perfect for each other - which makes their fate that much sadder.

I really like the jumping style of this - it's a little confusing at first, but it really adds to Alice's scattered thoughts and inability to comprehend what's going on. I also like how you explained the war by using the people walking on the street as a symbolic sign that the war is going on, therefore they can't be outside anymore, and everything's a little darker.

Augusta's visits are great as well, because we only see her from Neville's point-of-view and he's a little frightened by her, but we see that she's actually really proud of Neville and all that he's done.

I love the scene when Alice is talking to Neville about their trip to France - she seems like a brilliant mother, and then she starts talking about how Neville will be embarrassed by them, and it makes me so sad because they'll never get to that point.

THE ENDING. Oh my gosh you brought tears to my eyes. SHE REMEMBERED HIS NAME. This was so brilliant and sad and hopeful and I loved it so much. Great job with this one-shot!

-ShadowRose (Taylor)

Author's Response: Hello!

Wow, thank you so much! This really means a lot to me!

I've actually never watched Inception. I have the DVD (I know, GASP?! DVDS EXIST?!) but I've never actually watched it. It's on my 'To-do' list (you'd think I'd have a 'To-do' list for school but no) so I will get around to watching it one day, but so far, I have not watched Inception yet. :p

I really wanted it to be jumpy and confusing and scatterbrained just so Alice's mind could be portrayed through this. I'm glad I got it across then! :p

When Alice was talking to Neville about France, it made me feel so sad and emotional and I had to have a break from writing it. I just WANT THEM TO BE BETTER AHHH. D:

haha, I'm glad you liked the ending! I really enjoyed writing those last few lines! :D

Thank you for this absolutely lovely review, and sorry for taking ages to respond!

- Kayla. :)

 Report Review

Review #8, by ginerva_molly_weasley RÍve Voyager

13th July 2013:
This is a lovely story.

At first I was a little confused as I wasn't too sure where to place myself in the story because of the flashbacks and how quickly the story changed but I soon got to grips with it and understood what was happening.

The whole story of Frank and Alice was really sad but its interesting to wonder if they had retained any part of their memory at all and I feel you really helped answer some of the concerns even within this story. I love how this fits in exactly with canon as you would never really know whats happening in Alice's head yet you still put in the little visits from Augusta and Neville which I completely love.

I loved how she doesn't know about the baby and then the little snippets you have into their life, from them not meeting, to them dating, to them having the baby and then the torture. I thought the scene of torture was really interesting especially as it was the most traumatic experience in their life. It reminded me of the scene in the Department of Mysteries at the Ministry in OOTP so I love that you're in keeping with the death eater styles of things.

Finally when Alice says Neville's name its really sweet as it would have been something Neville had been waiting his whole life to hear. It also shows that there could be some hope of recovery for this family after the trauma which had happened. Alice's motherly thoughts were also really interesting.

Well done

Author's Response: Hello!

It was meant to be a bit confusing to read, don't worry! I wanted Alice's scatterbrained mind to shine through this fic. :p

I always try to make things as canon as possible because I'm one of those crazy nutters. :p So I'm glad you liked it!

I did envision the DoM scene in OoTP when I wrote that, so it must have shone through! :p

I'm so glad you enjoyed it, thank you for leaving a review and sorry for the long wait for the response!

- Kayla. :)

 Report Review

Review #9, by patronus_charm RÍve Voyager

13th July 2013:
Hi Kayla!

Ah this story brought tears to my eyes, it was honestly one of the saddest things I have come across in a while! I loved how we got a really broad aspect of their lives so we really got a sense of Alice and Frank before, during and after the war so we could understand and see how devastating these changes were to them.

I think my favourite parts were almost the ones after the war such as when Neville and Augusta go to visit them because theyíre just so sad due to them not being able to comprehend things and thatís what really made me tear up. Then the way Alice viewed her life with having to be helped to do things and not being able to recall anything as it shows how immobile they really are.

The memories of them being Aurors were really great too as it showed how powerful and awesome they used to be. I really found it fitting that it was with Bellatrix given what she did to them and all and it acted as an almost prelude to what happened to them later on in life. Another thing I really liked in that era was the scene with Neville and they were both talking to him. It was just so adorable and tragic because we knew what was about to happen but couldnít do a single thing to save them.

The ending of this was perfect as it gave me and Neville some hope that she may recover one day. Just saying his name was what really got to me, because it was such a simple thing yet she hadnít been able to utter it for so many years which was horrible! This was a really heart-breaking but lovely one-shot, Kayla! ♥


Author's Response: Hey, Kiana!

I'm sorry I made you cry, I don't do it on purpose! D:

I really wanted to show ALL their lifespan without dragging it on, so I'm glad that I have seemed to pull it off!

Yeah, the last line was sweet, wasn't it? :') I really loved writing that last paragraph-line-thingy. When I wrote it I just grinned and made myself feel all squishy haha!

Anyway, thank you so much for this lovely review and I'm so sorry about the ridiculous amount of time there was for this response!

- Kayla. :)

 Report Review

Review #10, by marauderfan RÍve Voyager

12th July 2013:
Wow, this was so good! I think it's really interesting that you decided to write from the POV of Alice while at St. Mungos. It gave the story a really odd feel, like it's hard to tell when things are happening or where they are, and the way I interpreted it, it was like Alice was watching her former self and Frank interact, sort of like when Harry sees things in the Pensieve. And I think that worked out perfectly considering Alice's mental condition at the time. The vagueness is really good.

I thought it was nice how she feels this strange connection to Frank but can't figure out why. It was beautiful and so sad. I wonder what he is thinking too.

I also like that you had Augusta introduce herself. I got the feeling that this was a very typical interaction and she introduced herself every time before speaking to them. Poor Augusta :(

Oh and Neville :( It was so sad to see that she didn't remember him! But it made me really happy when she at least remembered his name at the end. I imagine that would probably be so wonderful for Neville. Even though she still doesn't really know him, I'm sure he'd be thrilled when she knew his name for a moment.

You wrote a really amazing story and I wish I could give it an 11/10 because you deserve it! (Oh and GO HUFFLEPUFF)

Author's Response: Ah, thank you so much, Kristin! :D

I wanted it to be like SUPER VAGUE but I didn't want it to be so vague that no one understood it so I'm glad to hear that my vague-ness was done well. :D

I would absolutely LOVE to do a one-shot from Frank's POV but this was SO HARD TO WRITE and I have very little time so I'm not going to do it, but maybe one day I will and then I'll post it everywhere on the forums so people can read it. :p

Anyway, I'm really glad you enjoyed it! Sorry about the ridiculous lateness of this response!

So yeah, thanks for this lovely review!

- Kayla. ♥

 Report Review

Review #11, by Athene Goodstrength RÍve Voyager

12th July 2013:
Well, wow. This is a beautiful, intricate and tragic little tale, and a really creative take on the 'travel' theme. It sucked me in completely!

The missing relationship Alice has with Frank is so poignant, and really sensitively rendered. You do an excellent job of creating that sense we all get sometimes that we know something really well but just can't bring it to mind - and you show us how awful it is for someone like Alice living with that sensation for years. But the fact that you make her more than an empty shell, but a woman who still has an independent mind as she works so hard to remember, who still has this amazing but lost connection with her husband, is just so... ugh. Words just failed me. You did a lovely job with this story, basically.

The simple line, "She doesn't know him", just broke my heart completely. Oh, Neville.

I found the scene where Alice looks at her naked body in the mirror intensely sad, and incredibly moving. It's a simple image that beautifully illustrates the tragedy here... her body shows the marks of a life lived, that has now been forgotten.

Although you noted that the time-span might be hard to follow, I thought you did a good job of portraying Alice's lost sense of time. If you wanted to expand on this story after the HC, you could always add in a glimpse of the passing seasons as she looks out of the window?

I did notice a couple of issues with wording:

"She feels a connection with him, and he does too." - This sounds a little off - maybe something like "and he seems to feel it too"?

"Her and the man" - this is said a few times, and doesn't sound right. It should probably be "she and the man" or "the man and her".

Finally, there's a line in Augusta's conversation about where Frank inherited his powers which I'm sure is missing a word or two. It does sound a little odd when she calls them 'guys', as she always comes across as a very formal, staid character, but that might just be my perception!

Those little issues did not detract from this amazing story, well-written and with beautiful characterization. Well done!

Athene xo

Author's Response: Hello!

I'm going to let you in on a secret about the 'bringing things to mind' part: I used the feeling I have when I can't remember a dream, a plotline, words, where I put something. :p It was a real struggle but I'm glad to hear that I somewhat pulled it off! :)

That's a great idea about the seasons, I'm definitely going to think of changing that! I just currently have a lot of school work to do and exams to attend, so it'll probably end up being December before I finally remember to fix it. :p But thank you so much for that idea!

I did have a lot of trouble with this, and it was very rushed. So I will have a good edit and I'll fix it all up! Thank you for picking it all up! :D

I never realised that! As soon as you pointed it out, I was like, "Augusta wouldn't say that, Kayla what were you thinking?!"

So yeah, I'll go and fix it all up after school finishes, but thank you for pointing it out! :D

Thank you so much for this lovely review. Sorry for being so late in responding to it!

- Kayla. :)

 Report Review

Review #12, by Debra20 RÍve Voyager

12th July 2013:
This was...perfection. I sincerely cannot find the proper words to tell you how much it touched me. I think I cried from beginning to end because there was no other way to express my emotions.

I think I remember reading other stories that focused on Alice or Frank's life after they were tortured by the Death Eaters and lost their minds, but I can't remember one half as anguishing as this. I LOVE the Longbottoms. The story of their life and how it all ended for them is so bitter-sweet, that you can't help but feel sorry for them and love reading about them. Not only were they talented wizards, but they were amazing human beings as well. I don't think there's a single person in the books that can say anything bad about them. I'm simply fascinated with them and I jump on every opportunity I get to read about the pair.

You're very good at writing angst. The feelings were believable and the way you knitted the theme of the HC with the overall story was perfect. It felt like it belonged there. The way Alice remembers her life with Frank and Neville, her disjointed thoughts and tangled memories broke my heart. Their ending was so unfair and so tragic I still find my stomach hurting when I think about it. Not remembering who you are or your loved ones is one of the most terrible misfortunes that can befall a person.

I loved crying with this story. I think I'll add it to my favourites!

Author's Response: Aw thank you so much!

I'm so glad you liked it! It was super hard to write and I put in SO MUCH EFFORT. Glad to know that it paid off, though. :D

This review is just so lovely I want to squeeze you in a massive bear-hug! :D

Thank you so much for leaving this review, and sorry for taking like a WEEK to answer it. D:

Anyway, thanks again! ♥

 Report Review

Review #13, by RL RÍve Voyager

10th July 2013:
This story is amazing. I had never really thought about Alice or Frank, so this really sticks a good idea in my head about them. You are a great writer!

Author's Response: Wow, thank you so much!


 Report Review

Review #14, by potterfan310 RÍve Voyager

10th July 2013:
This story = so many feels!!!

There really aren't enough stories about Frank and Alice and what happens in St Mungo's.

I love the way they communicate with each other and know what the other is thinking without speaking.

I laughed at "I really didnít expect Wales to be like this. Fun honeymoon, eh?" Whoop for Wales!

Aww, by any chance are the red haired girl and greasy black haired boy Lily and Snape?

"Everyone is annoying at thirteen." This sentence speaks the absolute truth and nothing but the truth.

Alice Prewett, any relation to Molly?

Aww, baby Neville is adorable and along with Frank and Alice they make the cutest little family ♥

I feel like Augusta is usually an under loved character, so it's nice to see her and I like her characterisation and how she's boasting about Neville.

What Alice says to Neville is so adorable, but so sad because she'll never be able to tell him and Neville can't do what she thought he would and there's so many feels. Alice is so happy with her little boy, and yet she sees him growing up and hasn't really got any idea of who he is.

The ending is perfect and I've got tears, I love that Alice remembers his name and what she said back to him back when he was a baby!!!

This is beautifully written and your characterisation of Alice and Frank are spot on, especially since we don't know that much about what they get up to whilst in St Mungo's. ♥


Soph :)

Author's Response: haha I'm glad you enjoyed it! :)

There really aren't, and I've ALWAYS wanted to do a story on this pairing, so I guess I killed two birds with one stone! :p

Ooh, are you from Wales? That's cool!

Yes, they are! As I was writing the story I realised that it would be very strange to have Alice and Frank as the same age as the Marauders, Lily and Snape. So I decided to make the biggest age gap possible haha. :p

Everyone is annoying at thirteen and everyone regrets being the person they were at thirteen. *shudders*

Maybe, maybe not. I was just looking into Alice's last name and I saw the name 'Prewett' popping up a lot, and I know she was a Pureblood so it just made sense to use it. :p

haha they do make a cute family. :')

Augusta is underloved, she's a pretty badass character that needs a TON more recognition!

hehehe I know, when I wrote it I just wanted to curl up in a ball. :p I purposely did that haha. ;)

I'm so glad you loved it, sorry for making you cry! D:

Thank you so much for this amazing review! ♥

 Report Review

Review #15, by alicia and anne RÍve Voyager

9th July 2013:
This story caught my eye and I knew that I had to review it immediately!
This was just so... there's no words for how amazing this one shot was!

The way that you wrote Alice struggling to remember why she was doing certain things and then going to the flashbacks of her time with Frank and Neville was brilliant.

I loved how Augusta was trying to make her remember who Neville was and the proud way that she was talking about him.
And I loved what Alice was saying to Neville when he was a baby, about how no one would mess with him.

The ending though! Wow the ending was just wow, heart warming!
I teared up when she remembered his name! I wished we could have seen Neville's reaction to his mother speaking his name!

This was a brilliantly written one shot!

Author's Response: I was so surprised to see that you reviewed this. I thought I'd been imagining it because I was pretty sure you were the one who validated it and my eyes had just been crossing or something haha. :p

Anyway, thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it! :D

I'm glad the flashbacks were good, I struggled a little bit writing it because it was rather hard to write her dreaming/remembering. :p

I feel like Augusta is a very proud woman who wouldn't ever stop boasting about her brave grandson, so I'm glad that came across! :p

I have to admit, I loved the ending as well. I was stuck on it for AGES, I really didn't know how to end it and then that came to me and I kind of just danced around the room because I was so excited for that line! :p

Thank you so much for this amazing review! ♥

 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login