Reading Reviews for Weasley's in Egypt
  
19 Reviews Found

Review #1, by bellatrixlestrange123 Welcome to Egypt

10th February 2014:
Who doesn't love the Weasley's?! This was adorable to read! Bless Ron and his above suspicion attitude at times, it was so entertaining to read!

You have such a wide range of ability in the characters and plots you can write and you do all of them wonderfully! I loved the light hearted and family tone about this whole one shot, well done!

Author's Response: Finally getting to the last of your reviews!

I definitely agree, what sane person doesn't love the Weasley's?! They are by far one of the funniest, warmest and most welcoming people that I've ever come across! I'm so very glad to hear that you enjoyed the one-shot so much!

Thank you so much, I'm trying to expand my writing horizons so that I can have some experience and idea of how to write in other genres and other characters.

Thank you so much for the wonderful review!


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Review #2, by blackballet Welcome to Egypt

8th August 2013:
This was so cute! I think, if anything, the end was a bit disjointed, but still fun! I liked your interpretation of Percy, and the description of Egypt. I felt bad for Ginny, but I think she would have been a bit more adamant to go in!

It was fun to read, and definitely something new.

Author's Response: Hey there again! I see you're slowly working your way through my stories! I agree with you there, I do feel like the end is a bit disjointed but I've stared at it for so long that every time I think about re-writing it I move on to think about what else I would have to change and pretty soon I'm planning an entirely new one-shot.

I'm glad that you enjoyed it and thanks so much for reviewing!


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Review #3, by Erised Welcome to Egypt

14th July 2013:
Hi there, I'm here to return your lovely review for the HC!

Firstly, WEASLEYS! I love them, haha, and I have always wondered about their family trip when JKR first wrote about it but never really went into detail, so I definitely appreciate a story which shows an interpretation of their POV.

I thought that you nailed all the characters perfectly considering they're so well established - I especially loved Fred and George and their interactions with Percy! Mrs Weasley was so good too with her mothering ways. Your descriptions of the tombs and the horrible skeletons was also really good and made me giggle a bit. Those magic Egyptians eh?

The dynamics between all of the characters were really great but I thought that a little more description would have made this piece really amazing just so I could imagine more the setting and feel as if I were there. On the whole though, great work!

Author's Response: I've been answering reviews from you all day! Anyway, moving on.

Thank you, I was worried that I'd make the characters OOC and everyone would be pointing it out. That or I worried that they didn't sound witty enough or something like that.

Ron did mention that the skeletons in the last tomb were all deformed and stuff so I figured I might as well go with it!

I was worried about the description, I didn't feel like there was really enough. Thanks for the feedback and the criticism though!


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Review #4, by HollyStone73 Welcome to Egypt

13th July 2013:
This was cute! I always wished that there had been more details about the Weasley trip in the books because I absolutely love Egyptian history. I felt bad for poor Ginny not being able to visit the pyramid, but love how Fred and George tried to lock Percy up. I always feel bag for Molly for having to try to keep on her toes with the twins, but am impressed at how well she does it! LOL! Overall I think this was well-written and was a pleasure to read!

Author's Response: I figured I would take this opportunity to go into more detail about traveling details that where already mentioned in the books but hadn't really been gone into detail. I also feel bad for Ginny for not being able to go in the last tomb but I don't blame her if the things in there were worse than that mummy with the spider's coming out of it's eyes and mouth.

There's no one like Molly Weasley to keep children in line. Thanks so much for reviewing!


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Review #5, by PolyJuice_ Welcome to Egypt

13th July 2013:
This was such a cool fic, I loved how even though it was canon it was sometime that we've not seen a lot of, in JKR or FF, which was neat. Not only that but you kept pulling bits of canon info, such as Ginny being made to stay outside.

Loved the way you did the twins, they were absolutely hilarious and I laughed my way through this fic. (In a good way, I assure you)

I totally loved the actual writing in this story itself, and am finding myself saying yet again how grateful I am to the HC for making me review and read these stories, because I've started poking around your author page and I like what I see! :3 I'll be heading over there once the livestream is over and reading a bit!

Liz

House Cup ~ 2013 ~ Slytherin

Author's Response: Thank you, I tried to stay as cannon to what happened in the book as I could, I had Prisoner of Azkaban next to me as I was writing this so that I could make references.

I'm happy to hear that you laughed your way through the fic, I was aiming for that but I wasn't really sure if I had actually achieved that so it's nice to hear that I've made someone laugh.

Aw shucks, thank you so much and if you ever do read anything else besides this entry, I hope you enjoy it! Thanks so much for reviewing and for the positive feedback!


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Review #6, by ScarletEye158 Welcome to Egypt

13th July 2013:
Hey there! This was a really nice one-shot :D

I really liked how you used the Weasley's vacation to Egypt for your story because I love reading about other people's views on things from the series when there really isn't much story behind it. I mean, JK Rowling obviously gave you some things to work with (Locking Percy in a tomb, the mummies, the Sneakoschope) but it was cool to see you add your own bits to it to make it yours :)

Your characterization of the Weasley family was really nice and I think you were dead on with all of their personalities! I really liked Ginny and Percy because I think those two changed the most (Especially in Next Gen stories) but you still gave them their characteristics from the 2nd/3rd books and it was really cool to read :)

I did notice a few typos, but I'm sure you will go back and edit them when you can! I can understand why you wanted to get this out fast for the House Cup :) The main typos that I noticed were with the character names, actually. Percy was once "Pert" and Fred was once "Free". Those are the ones that stuck out to me the most :P

Anyways, I really liked your one-shot and I'm glad I got to read about the Weasley's vacation! It was always something that was kind of mentioned once and then forgot about and reading this brought back memories of me reading POA for the first time :)

-Amanda

Author's Response: Hello there!

Originally, I was going to stick with just what J. K. Rowling gave me to work with but I decided that there wasn't enough mentioned to keep it interesting so I added some small things.

I was worried that the characters would be OOC, that was my biggest fear so it's nice to know that someone else found the characterization to be dead on.

Yeah, I was in a bit of a hurry to get something out for the House Cup and I was trying to type as fast possible so there were quite a few typos. I've gone back and edited them out so hopefully the one-shot is better.


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Review #7, by ginerva_molly_weasley Welcome to Egypt

13th July 2013:
Haha this is one of the best House Cup entries I've read as its such an iconic part in the Weasley's life because its their first vacation as a family in the books however its not often written about. Also your banner drew me to the story so whoever the artist was did a very good job here!

The different aspect of this story were good and I liked how they were broken down. You had the flying carpet ride which I would have loved to hear more on. The Weasley's obviously hadn't been on one before as they were banned so I would have imagined that there would have been some chatter among the Weasley family about how fantastic or scary it was.

Then we had the scene where they first went to the tombs. I liked the fact that they had visited the tomb that they were to lock Percy up in beforehand as we got to know more about the tomb but also knew how to shut it. I loved how they made Ginny wait outside as that was in keeping with the story but I also loved the gruesome description you had in there about the muggle skeletons.

The mummy tour also looked very interesting but would Ron really have asked to touch the mummys? Very unlikely in my view but you never know!

The end was more tying up loose ends for me such as talking about writing to Harry but also then on about Percy's head boy position. It seemed as if you were trying to fit everything in. The only thing I felt that was missing in the story was some transition periods such as saying 'On the next morning' between the tomb and the mummy tour as I think it got a little confusing as I didn't exactly know where I was in terms of their trip but its minor really.

I loved this story!

GinevraMollyPotter
Slytherin

Author's Response: Why thank you! That means a lot to me that you think that! I'm glad that you read this and that -by the sounds of it- you enjoyed it! All credit goes to the amazing artist Eponine @ tda for making me this amazing banner!

Yeah, I kind of skimmed over the carpet ride, didn't I? I do imagine that there would be a lot of talk about the ride among the family though. I tried to stay as cannon as possible so I'm glad to see that I've achieved my goal with that!

Ron might not have wanted to touch the mummy but in my head I pictured him doing it since he had a habit of wanting to touch or poke things that he shouldn't.

You've caught me! I was trying to fit everything in and it seems that whatever I'm thinking or feeling somehow always leaks into writing!

Thanks for reviewing and for the feedback!


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Review #8, by ohmymerlin Welcome to Egypt

13th July 2013:
Hello. :)

This was quite good! I've never read a story where the Weasley's are in Egypt, so it has now set the bar for any others. ;)

I loved the descriptions when they were going through the tombs. I've never been in an Egyptian tomb, and I hardly know anything about it (in class we did a whole Egypt section but that was 5 and 6 years ago!) but it was believable. I even got a little spooked reading it, so good work!

However, there were a few grammatical errors but you've said in your author's note you'll fix it up and the mistake just need to be read over once and you'll be able to fix them, so don't worry too much about it!

I loved how you've incorporated the tiny canon details we know, like the Sneakoscope, the beetles in Bill's soup, Fred and George trying to lock Percy in a pyramid, etc. You wrote it well, and I could totally see the Weasleys doing that!

I really liked this! Good work! :)

- Kayla. :)

Author's Response: Hello! Finally getting around to this!

Woohoo! That's the first time that I've ever heard someone say that to me! I'm sure that there are other stories about the Weasley's in Egypt but I still feel incredibly flattered that I set the bar (which I'm sure will get passed).

I don't know much about Egypt or the pyramids either except what I've read from books so that part was a bit difficult. I'm glad to hear that it was believable and that you got spooked, I thought I didn't have enough description so I was worried about that.

Yeah, the typos and everything were just not very nice to look at. I went back and fixed them though so hopefully everything is much better now.

Thanks for reviewing!


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Review #9, by missclaire17 Welcome to Egypt

13th July 2013:
Oh my gosh, I'm SO glad that you wrote a one-shot on the Weasleys' trip to Egypt! It's one of those things that I really wish was in the book, but wasn't. I think you did a brilliant job of portraying everything and including the plot points that we do know about the Weasleys' trip from the books. The bit about the Sneakoscope was hilarious. Fred and George's mischievous ways were depicted so wonderfully! Awesome job!(:

Author's Response: I couldn't help but smile at the beginning of this. I can tell that you enjoyed it and I'm happy that you did! I had fun going into detail about everything that happened! I did go back and check and double check to make sure that I'd gotten everything as close as possible. It was a while before I was sure that I'd gotten everything that happened right.

I'm glad that you enjoyed it though and thanks for reviewing!


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Review #10, by LittleLionGirl Welcome to Egypt

13th July 2013:
Quite an interesting HC choice AlexFan. I knew the trip to Egypt was talked about but it was really nice to see some sort of actual detail as well as it being made into a coherent piece about the redhead clan.
XOXOX,
LLG

Author's Response: I enjoyed going into detail about what happened, it was a lot of fun and I'm glad that you find it interesting! I'm happy to hear that you enjoyed reading this and thanks for reading and reviewing!

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Review #11, by Siriuslover177 Welcome to Egypt

12th July 2013:
This was really interesting.
You never really get to hear what the Weasley's do on their trip to Egypt, so this was very cool.
I really enjoyed the part of Fred and Gorge trying to trap Percy in the tomb, that was very funny :P
I really liked it. Nice job.

~Sarah

Author's Response: I tried to make it interesting and I'm glad that you enjoyed it! There were some vague details about what happened so I figured that I'd go into detail about them.

I'm happy to hear that you enjoyed this and the is for reviewing


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Review #12, by ShadowRose Welcome to Egypt

12th July 2013:
Hello there!

I love the "missing moments" element to this story - I think the Weasley's trip to Egypt was definitely a fun part of the series, and I like that someone decided to write about it here. :) I love that you included some of the canon things in here, like Fred and George trying to lock Percy in a tomb, and the twins putting beetles in Bill's soup.

The characterizations throughout were very well-done as well. Fred and George were their typical troublemaking selves, and they always took the chance to make fun of Percy. I loved George's line "Yeah, Ronald, how dare you make a statement." I could practically hear the sarcasm in his voice. I also loved Ron's line, "Well, you tried." That's a very Ron-like thing to say, and I definitely found myself laughing along. And then Percy was being his typical pompous self, and Ginny was trying to see everything despite being a little too young for it.

"Sort of. The Weasley's didn't really do normal." That's seriously a perfect description of their family. :)

There were a few little spelling things that I saw here. For one, I saw a "Nike" instead of "Nile." I would assume they didn't go to a sporting goods store, haha. :P The spacing changes at the ends as well.

Overall, this was a very well-written one-shot, and I'm glad I got the chance to read it!

-ShadowRose (Taylor)

Author's Response: After abandoning my original idea for the challenge, this jumped to mind and I immediately started writing it. Glad to see that everyone's taking to it so well! I tried to stay as cannon as possible, Prisoner of Azkaban did not leave my sight while I was writing.

I'm also glad to hear that I've got the characterization good. I was worried that everyone would be OOC and it would be pointed out.

Those darned typos. I've gone back and fixed them though so that probably should be gone. The spaces should be fixed as well, everything kind of derped it seems.

Thanks for reviewing and for the feedback!


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Review #13, by Roots in Water Welcome to Egypt

12th July 2013:
Hello there!

Ooooh- a "missing moment" from the series! What a great storyline to choose. I really liked how you included both the "leave-Percy-behind-in-a-pyramid" story as well as the "sneakoscope/beetle-in-the-soup" anecdote.

I think that you did a good job here with the characterizations. George and Fred were appropriately troublesome and Percy was just as pompous as ever. The only thing I was surprised by was Mrs Weasley leaving Ginny alone outside of the pyramid. I'd have thought that she'd have either told something to keep her company or kept her company herself. After all, they're in a completely different company and Ginny is only twelve years old.

Your descriptions of the insides of the tomb were creepy- I would have avoided the skeleton with the never-ending stream of spiders too! Poor Ron. He probably would have wished that he'd stayed outside with Ginny after that.

It's certainly interesting that they use magic carpets as transportation - another cultural experience for the Weasleys. What I really want to know is how they prevent people from falling off of them - probably some sort of charm. But I'm also interested in reading more about their carpet ride. I'm sure that they'd have had some interesting reactions to being so far off the ground. Perhaps Fred and George would have jokingly attempted to push Percy off of it.

One of my favourite moments from this one-shot was Ron's shoulder pat - "Well, you tried". It was such a Ron thing to say and definitely a sentiment that many kids would share about annoying siblings.

I noticed a few typos that I thought I'd point out quickly for when you return to edit it later on. To begin, I believe that in the phrase "Pert back to the tomb" "Pert" should be "Percy". As well, with "Were you tying", "tying" should be "trying" and with "was in the Nike", "Nike" should be "Nile", unless the Weasleys were also looking at the store. :P

All in all, I think that you did a good job with this one-shot. Good work! :D

Author's Response: Hello there! Finally getting around to answering reviews after being kind of lazy!

I had a lot of fun writing this and I tried to stay as cannon as possible. Prisoner of Azkaban became my short term best friend. I carried it with me until I was finished writing this.

I thought about what you mentioned about Mrs Weasley and you're right. It makes no sense for her to leave her only daughter in a cursed tomb without supervision. I went and fixed that part in when I went back and fixed some things in the one-shot. Thanks for pointing that out, I never would've spotted it otherwise.

I fixed the typos so there should be no more of those lying around. Never know though, I might've missed some but when I went back and edited I made sure to get rid of them.

Thanks so much for reviewing and for the awesome feedback! It was much appreciated


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Review #14, by LilyEPotter Welcome to Egypt

12th July 2013:
Hi! Here for the House Cup review!

This is a nice story about when the Weasleys went on their trip in Egypt. Strange how they never talked about it after that first little bit in the books, especially since Bill was still over there for awhile.

I believe I would agree about being annoyed with all the sand in my eyes and would find it difficult to stand at a river's edge for two hours to only look at it. :)

Great story!

Author's Response: Hello'

Now that I think about it, that is a little bit strange, you'd think that Harry would've wanted to know the details and that Ron would've spilled the beans on the trip. I guess Sirius Black overshadowed that and keeping safe was on everyone's mind instead.

Getting sand in your eye is the worst, you blink and blink to try and get it out but it only seems to get worse. And then you rub your eyes but that makes it worse and your eyelashes end up getting tangled. It's no fun.

Thanks for reviewing!


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Review #15, by marauderfan Welcome to Egypt

12th July 2013:
This was great! I'm really glad you decided to write about the Weasleys' trip to Egypt, because based on the few tidbits we heard about it in PoA it sounded like a blast. I'm so glad you incorporated the beetles in the soup, and locking Percy in a pyramid. I think my favourite line was when the twins told Ron they got caught trying to lock Percy in, and Ron said "At least you tried" :D Your description of that one tomb was great, especially the skeleton with the spiders (ew!) - I can see why they didn't allow 12 year old Ginny to go in. Crazy curses those ancient Egyptians had on their tombs! Nice work on this :)

Author's Response: I'm glad that I picked to write about their trip to Egypt! It seemed like a fun topic to write about (after the original idea just annoyed me).

I was worried that I hadn't done the description of the tomb justice. I felt like there should've been more so that it seemed more gruesome. As someone who isn't afraid of spiders, even I would've avoided that skeleton.

Thanks for reading and reviewing!


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Review #16, by MrsJaydeMalfoy Welcome to Egypt

12th July 2013:
I think this is really good, dear! Don't be so hard on yourself!

I think it's really great to finally get to see the Weasleys' trip to Egypt! I had completely forgotten that Bill was there working as a Curse-Breaker... *facepalm*

I think my favorite line was at the beginning, when George said "Yeah Ron, how dare you make a statement?" I could just HEAR the sarcastic tone in his voice, and it was really funny! I also loved how the twins kept right on trying to pull prank after prank! How very in-character for them!

All in all, I think this is a lovely one-shot, dear! Good job!

Author's Response: Don't worry, I forgot that when I started writing as well and then I had to go back and make sure that everything was right.

The twins were the easiest people to keep in character, it's just so easy to write them as mischievous.

I'm glad that you enjoyed it and thanks for reviewing!


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Review #17, by HeyMrsPotter Welcome to Egypt

12th July 2013:
As soon as this challenge was announced I was hoping someone would write about the Weasley's in Egypt so I'm really glad you did!

I thought that the best part of this story was how in character everyone was, you really have their voices and mannerisms perfectly.

I love that you took little details from Prisoner of Azkaban and turned them into this wonderful one-shot, like Ginny not being allowed in one of the pyramids, the twins trying to lock Percy in and the beetles in the soup. They were written in brilliantly.

I noticed a couple of typos: Georg instead of George, Rom instead of Ron, full instead of fill, Nike instead of Nile, but I think those are probably down to the excitement of writing for the HC, I know I did the exact same thing ;)

Superb one-shot, I really enjoyed reading this :)

Author's Response: It's taken me a while but I'm finally getting around to this!

Writing about the Weasley's trip was really a last minute thing, I'd planned on something different but their trip seemed to good to pass up.

I was scared that the characters wouldn't be on character enough but I'm glad to see that that's not the case!

I wanted to stay as cannon as possible so Prisoner of Azkaban was with me the entire time that I wrote this. And thanks for pointing out the typos, I've fixed them now so hopefully they're not there anymore.


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Review #18, by Courtney Dark Welcome to Egypt

10th July 2013:
Hey there!

This was a fun read - I always enjoy reading 'missing moments' from the Harry Potter books, and this definitely fit the bill!

I loved that you kept this so canon, describing some of the events that Ron told Harry about in the third book - like the fact that Fred and George tried to lock Percy in a tomb, that Ginny wasn't able to go in the last one and that the twins put beetles in Bill's soup.

There were quite a few spelling errors (most of which were probably typos) so I would definitely suggest going back and editing this!

Nice work!

Courtney:)

Author's Response: Hello!

I'm glad that you enjoyed it and I had tons of fun writing it (I'm still not happy with it). Keeping to cannon seemed the easiest thing to do, I'd already been given the material, I might as well go into detail about it!

I can imagine that there were quite a few spelling errors and I'm sorry for that, I plan on fixing this up some more as soon as my Internet is working again.

Thanks for the feedback and for reviewing!


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Review #19, by WitnesstoitAll Welcome to Egypt

8th July 2013:
Hey! Thanks for contributing to this event for Ravenclaw!! :)

This was such a fun little one-shot! I love reading 'missing moment' sorts of stories, and this one really brought the Weasleys' trip to Egypt to life. The twins trying to lock Percy in the tomb, Ron obtaining the Sneakoscope... it was all great! My only real bit of criticism is the absence of Charlie... I may be wrong but I think he met up with the rest of the Family there. All in all this was fun, entertaining read. I love the Weasleys, and you certainly did them justice.

Good work!

Author's Response: I wanted to help out my house, I'm just glad that I got this finished and in the queue before it closed (I'm still not all that happy with it and plan on editing as soon as possible).

Anyway, I'm glad that you enjoyed it and you may be right about the Charlie bit. I just never remembered him being there so I left him out. I'll look into it though!

Thank you so much for the feedback and for reviewing!


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