Reading Reviews for Mother Dearest
  
7 Reviews Found

Review #1, by toomanycurls Helena Ravenclaw

1st December 2013:
RRT time!!

I really love how eerie this is from the beginning. Your banner and summary gave me the chills. I love the dissolusionment Helena has just in the first paragraph. It stirs up images of realizing that parents are flawed, her mother isn't just there to coddle her, and that yes - parents lie.

Using old english is such a brialliant move for the dialogue in this story. You've managed it quite well too!

Helena definitely gives off the defiant teenager vibe in this story. Her thrill at upseting Rowena is perfect for her age and spoiled nature.

Her glee at stealing from Rowena and anticipation while doing so dramatic. It was quite thrilling to read.

I can't believe she waited in the castle just to hear her mother's scream! Such a gutsy move.

I really enjoyed this. The story of the lost diadem has intrigued me since DH and you put a quite believable tale behind it.

-Rose

Author's Response: Hey, you're back! I always get really nervous whenever I see that someone has read and reviewed this because I'm always worried that they're going to hate it.

The chills vibe was what I was kind of aiming for with the summary and the banner so woohoo for me on that front!

Thank you very much on my use of Olde English, I figured it would fit the story considering the time period and I tried my best with it so it's good to see that the effort didn't go to waste!

I'm picturing Helena throwing a modern teenager fit but I;m not exactly sure what her tantrum would be like. All I picture is, "God mum, I'm going upstairs to brush my hair!"

I tried to put as much description when Helena was stealing the Diadem simply because it's one of those scenes where you need a lot of description so you can get sucked in.

Thank you so much for your wonderful review!


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Review #2, by Luna Helena Ravenclaw

18th August 2013:
I greatly enjoyed this! I've always loved Ravenclaw house and i think that this view on Rowena and helena is brilliant! She snuck into her room and took the diadem! If I had any feedback it would be that you started out using lots of thous and thees, but by the end they became less and less. Anyway great work!

Author's Response: It's a relief to hear that you did. I was so nervous putting this out there because I thought everyone would hate it but the feedback has been great on it so far.

It took me a long time (by my standards at least) to write this because I was thinking about what lead up to Ravenclaw stealing the diadem and running away and how she would do it and where the diadem itself would be.

The medieval talk seems to be one of the things that people really like about this and that was also a huge relief because I didn't know if it would work. The reason that it's all there though is because everyone in that time period spoke Olde English and as much as I wanted to write in Olde English, I couldn't because it's like a whole other language and this was the closest that I could get to it.

Anyway, thanks for reviewing!


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Review #3, by blackballet Helena Ravenclaw

5th August 2013:
I really liked this! I think it was interesting when Helena said her mother could be quite daft. It was her arrogance that brought her down in the end. Great job! There were a few very small errors, but those can be fixed by just reading it over again.

Author's Response: I'm glad that you liked it! You are very right, Helena's arrogance was what ended her life in the end. I spent so long writing this and I must've looked over it more than five times but I guess I must've missed some things, I'll go back and see if I can find the mistakes and fix them.

Thanks for reviewing!


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Review #4, by StellaRose Helena Ravenclaw

4th August 2013:
Sorry, my first review must not have gotten posted yesterday :/

Anyway, I really like this--well done! I remember reading about Helena in the HP books and thinking that she sounded full of regret. I can't imagine being a ghost and having to spend eternity with the knowledge that a simple act of vengeance caused such a sinister chain of actions.

The only thing I would add is more description to the characters and their surroundings. Since it's an older era, you could have fun describing their clothes and what their home looks like--just an idea!

All in all though, great job! I look forward to reading more of your pieces :)

Author's Response: Thank you, I tried very hard on it because I wanted it to be as historically correct as possible. It would be horrible having to spend eternity and to constantly be reminded of what you did.

I didn't actually focus on the clothes too much, that completely slipped my mind. I was more focused on getting the actions, dialogue and thought processes right and I completely forgot about it. I think I will go back and add in some more description on that.

Thank you so much for reviewing and for your feedback, it was very appreciated!


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Review #5, by magnolia_magic Helena Ravenclaw

15th July 2013:
Wow, this was so powerful! I love finding good Founders fics, and this is a gem. Wonderful job!

You're the first person I've ever seen attempt Old English in a fic, and I'm really impressed with the effort. Normally it does kind of turn me off because it takes me a while to decipher it, and that takes away from the mood. But your guide at the beginning was very helpful, and you wrote the dialogue in a way that got the message across regardless of the difficult words. And overall, I think it added to the medieval feel. Nice job with that!

Oh, Helena. I can see how slighted she feels by her mother, and how much it hurts her. But I can't help but feel like maybe she's mistaken about her mother's feelings toward her? Rowena doesn't seem like a neglectful mother, really, and all Helena's talk of "lies" seems a little...off. Something's been twisted in her mind, I think. That just makes the ending of this fic pack even more of a punch :/

This was a very striking, powerful, well-written oneshot! I am so glad I got a chance to read it!

--Maggie

Author's Response: Thank you! It took me a while to write this because I'm not really that good writing this type of era and I wanted to keep it as historically accurate as possible.

Really? I always assumed that people used some form of Old English in a Founder's fic so I thought I'd just blend in with using that type of language. Writing with Old English was difficult because I kept having to check to make sure that I was using the proper words and what the words meant and that they fit. The language was the most difficult part of writing this, I knew what I wanted to happen, I just needed to get it across to the reader properly.

Something is definitely off with Helena. She didn't really get as much attention paid to her as a child as other children probably did so she came to the conclusion that her mother didn't love her and that she was lying.

Thank you so much for your kind words, it really means a lot to me. Thanks so much for reviewing!


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Review #6, by luvinpadfoot Helena Ravenclaw

14th July 2013:
This was great! I haven't read many stories that focused on Helena Ravenclaw and this was very realistic. I loved her response to her mother, the knowledge that her mother lied, and her desire to ruin her mother's life, even if she never explicitly stated that.

It was cruel for her to take the diadem, but at the same time it seemed so justified. Rowena was an awful mother, not evil, but realistically awful which I think made it that much worse for Helena. I really felt for her.

And the end was so perfect. You couldn't have written it any better. The last line held so much power in it alone. And the assumption that Helena has left her mother forever.

This was truly a wonderful story and you are incredibly talented! I loved it!

Author's Response: Why thank you, I tried to make it realistic. I'm glad that I made you feel something for Helena, that's always something that I try to achieve and I'm glad that I managed to do it here.

I'm very proud of the ending so I'm glad that you enjoyed it. I was trying to come up with an ending that was good and it took me a while but I finally did it. I'm very happy to see that everyone is responding so well to it.

Thank you so much for your feedback and your compliments, I'm incredibly flattered that you think I'm talented and thank you so much for reading and reviewing this!


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Review #7, by HollyStone73 Helena Ravenclaw

5th July 2013:
This was incredibly well written. You captured Helena's feelings brilliantly and I could easily visualize her sneaking into her mother's room. I found myself torn between feeling sorry for Helena or angry at her for seeming like such a spoiled little child. LOL! But I guess knowing what the very near future had in store for her ultimately just made me want to call out to her to stop and reconsider what she was doing. Great job. It was very fun to read!

Author's Response: Thank you, this was one of the most difficult things to write for me because the way I had to write wasn't supposed to be modern. It seems that I've managed to make description work for me very well at least once in my writing!

Thank you so much for the feedback and thanks for reviewing!


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