Reading Reviews for Traitorous Hearts
  
109 Reviews Found

Review #1, by marauderfan The Lady of Greengrass Hall

19th December 2014:
WHOOO LAST PAPER! I'm here to offer you encouragement in the form of a review :D

Okay, I know I shouldn't be supporting her choices of loyalty but I just want to say how much I love that Lavinia Greengrass was a spy for the Death Eaters. It's nice to see that the group was not only men and Bellatrix - I like to see some balance between the sexes! :D Which you have done wonderfully here by pointing out that Bellatrix was not the only female Death Eater. And I love that she was there really for her own glory and couldn't really be bothered about Voldemort. That said... I don't support Death Eaterness, but I like that you added another female to the group. Ahaha, this probably makes me sound ridiculous. Moving on. Also I like the name Lavinia.

I love the back story on Astoria and the way you've written her character - her motives are understandable given her background. She sounds like she's on her own side, and I really like that. She also seems like she's not the sort of person who can easily be swayed to one side or the other. I am curious what it was Lavinia found out! And who killed her? And what has Astoria done? Aah, you've set up this wonderful mystery and it's so captivating.

Love your character set up - your Astoria is wonderfully clever and manipulative, and the brief glimpse we got of Malfoy is spot on as well - and I look forward to finding out more! Great chapter! And good luck on your essay!! :D

 Report Review

Review #2, by aidanlynchrox Behind the Bleeding Walls

29th November 2014:
As always I'm so excited to see what happens next, I adore the way that you've portrayed Astoria and can't wait to read more!! Keep up the hard work :)

Author's Response: Hi! I'm so excited that you're excited! Thank you so much--I love writing Astoria and can't wait to *write* more (if I can just get through these pesky exams, right?).

Thank you so much for reviewing!

--Penny


 Report Review

Review #3, by Ohpl Behind the Bleeding Walls

28th November 2014:
You have a real gift for writing.Your characters are strong and clear . I am looking forward to reading the rest of your story very much.

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I really appreciate that, and I hope you enjoy the rest! Thanks (again) for taking the time to review! It's so encouraging :D

--Penny


 Report Review

Review #4, by Gabriella Hunter A Changing Tide

11th October 2014:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums stopping by with your review and it's so good to be back, evil twin! I was wondering what was going on with this story and was just about to sneak on over here without a request. Hehehee.

So, a lot happened in this chapter! I'm not sure if I'll even begin to touch on everything that I loved about it, sadly. Astoria of course is the strongest female character that I've read in a long time, I really love how determined and fierce she is. The beginning of this chapter though had me really tense, I wasn't sure who was playing who and what Draco would do next. Astoria sly and very cunning in her ability to read others but I think that she wasn't counting on Draco to actually outwit her. Or at least, baffle her somewhat.

Draco was calm, collected and arrogant but I knew that he had no intention of really hurting her. There was an undercurrent of attraction in this chapter that just had me at the edge of my seat, it was the first time that it was acknowledged on both sides. That was a dangerous move for both of them, becoming distracted by one another like that but I loved how smoothly you worked it in. I felt that they each had something to gain from the other but right then, I was worried that Astoria's life was going to be cut short.

The moment when she realizes that it was all for nothing anyway though was hard to read. Astoria was willing to lie to save her family and it didn't even matter! I like that brief moment of hysterics you gave her though, I'm not sure if she'll ever allow herself to be weakened like that again but it was a softer side to her that we hadn't seen yet.

Draco's POV was lovely to read as well, I liked that you shamelessly write how much of a coward he is on one hand but show that he still has a heart on the other. The powerful need to do something for himself but to also just have a bit more time with Astoria just spoke volumes. Also, gorgeous writing! >:)

Now, I wasn't expecting these things:

Astoria to attack Draco with a fireplace poker.

Greyback

Draco DEFENDING Astoria and committing treason!

Like...what?! The second half of this chapter was so brilliantly written that I didn't even dare to take a breath. I was terrified for Astoria, amazed by Draco's strength and a bit frightened by what's going to happen next. I think that you packed everything into this chapter, giving me no chance at all to ever forget about it. Hahaha.

Totally loved it, obviously and thanks for the read! Also, I noticed more of our evil twin mind melds. In A Force of Wills, Blaise Zabini smells similar to the way you describe Draco and your Astoria is just as feisty as mine. Of course, I had my Astoria smack Draco in the face with a Transfiguration textbook but hey, our girls get the point across, eh? Hahahahah.

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Gabbie! I'm so sorry for not responding to this absolutely crazy wonderful review earlier! RL attacked me, bashed me over the head, and I've only just now managed a bit of an escape.

Yay! It warms my heart so much to see that you find Astoria to be a strong female character, because that's exactly what I was going for. Flawed, but strong and clever. And you're right about her underestimating Draco. They both have been sort of reminding themselves that they need to pay attention to each other; Draco is sharper than Astoria expected, and Astoria is far better at this "game" than Draco had anticipated. They spend the whole time *trying* not to underestimate each other, but they both definitely do it. Astoria definitely did not think Draco would turn the tables on her like that.

And Draco. Well, there's a lot that he didn't see coming ;)

I'm SO EXCITED that you really felt the tension! You have no idea how happy that makes me. There's definitely an attraction on both sides, and these two very controlled people aren't exactly certain how best to handle that. It is not convenient (especially for Draco). Draco didn't really want to think about his intentions. Does he hurt people sometimes? Yes. More often he is instructed to stand by and witness the destruction. He calls the hounds, so to speak. You're right, though: he didn't really want to do that, even from the beginning, with Astoria. He certainly never intended to lay a hand on her, himself. But he knew he was just the first wave, and that those behind him absolutely would.

I'm glad you liked Astoria's break down. You're totally right--it's not a side of her we're not likely to see often. It's a tucked away corner of her personality, brought on by absolute desperation. And it was important, because we saw what's absolutely at Astoria's core: she would do just about anything to protect her family. Even sacrifice her pride, which, for her, was the only thing she had left. She would give up everything for them.

THANK YOU EVIL TWIN! I can't tell you how happy I am that you liked Draco's section. I didn't want to sugarcoat him. He *has* been a coward. But I think that he could want to be more than that.

SURPRISE ATTACK! :) Muahaha. I wanted to show early on that Astoria is not as dependent on her magic as some people. As she's previously mentioned, she depends on her mind. And I also wanted to show her determination and willingness to use any tools available to her. She's resourceful and determined.

Greyback! Well, of course we needed a Big Bad. I had always wanted for it not to be something Draco could simply choose not to do. He was never the man with the axe in his hands--that was too easy. There had to be someone else in the mix; someone he had to stop. I wanted Draco to step up. It showed more courage to stand up to someone, especially someone who both terrified and disgusted him. And, of course, he gained multiple advantages from it: not only did he save Astoria and her family, but he became more powerful by refusing to be walked over. Which is nice, because it muddies his intentions and confuses him even more. Even he can't totally distinguish his intentions (especially since he's used to expecting the worst from himself).

Poor Draco. So confused. I'm so mean. Haha!

And thank you! That compliment really means so much to me.

Great minds write alike! Hooray for feisty Astorias, who don't back down and who hit people with things when it's necessary. That's our girl!

Much love back atcha! You're the best evil twin a girl could ask for.

--Penny




 Report Review

Review #5, by GingeredTea The Lady of Greengrass Hall

7th October 2014:
Alright, so you had me with the last chapter, but now you really have me here.

Did you come up with the name " Lavinia"?

"Lavinia Greengrass became a spy." And I just became really really intrigued!

You write Astoria with exquisite care and I can just see how alive she is as a character for you. Your descriptions lend rather than retract from your story, and I can see it all play out in my mind.

"Draco Malfoy didnt realise just how right he was. At least, she hoped he did not." EEE - I nearly bit my finger nails. Don't discover her!

Then you switch back in time and we get another small glimpse into the true beginnings of this story.

I'm starting to suspect you have a talent for memorable one-liners. "It appeared that Lavinia Greengrass had perhaps, in the end, learned one secret too many. " - loved this one!

This revealed a lot - mainly how Astoria came to be the young adult she is. I am well and hooked and will see you over ---> in a couple!

Author's Response: Hey! I'm so sorry for taking forever (and ever) to answer this review! Real life just totally overwhelmed me, and I haven't been around HPFF as much lately. But school's wrapping up, so I should be able to be more active. Hooray!

Firstly, thank you for this lovely review! I'm so glad that you found this chapter to be a good hook.

I did come up with the name Lavinia (although it turns out it's also a character on Downton Abbey, but I had not seen DA when I wrote that chapter). I mean, it was already a name, out there--I didn't invent it. But I also didn't draw it from anything else. I took the name from a scene I had written for a class, and I must have done research to name *that* character, who came from a similar background as this Lavinia does. To me, the name sounds kind of old and high class, which was what I was going for :)

Heehee. Lavinia IS a rather intriguing character. At least in my opinion. But then, I do have a bit of a bias.

Awww, thank you! Astoria is definitely a very "alive" character to me. I like the way you describe that--it's just right. And I'm so glad you like the descriptions, since I do work really hard on them :D

Muahaha--I can reveal nothing!

And thank you again! I love getting to know what lines made an impression on people, and I was really fond of that one.

Thank you so much for this absolutely lovely review! I hope you do continue to read and enjoy the story!

--Penny


 Report Review

Review #6, by Chazzie The Writing On the Wall

1st October 2014:
Hey Penny!
You know, this is a thing, I read it.


.. Okay, I wasn't that funny. Sorry. I have a weird sense of humour. Anyway, story. I really love this so far. Your Astoria is simply perfect, she is very sarcastic and relatable to the reader (or to me at least) which leaves a lasting impression.
I was very disappointed when my internet cut out, because I simply couldn't stop reading. It was full of turns and twists, sweet moments like the part with her father in the library, and suspenseful ones such as Draco using legetimency. You quite simply stole my breath away with your language. I don't remember quite the wording, but Ginny's hair being like a banner of red? That imaging worked really well. I also loved the fact that we saw the Gryffindors in a biase way, like Slytherins in most stories. Brilliant job here, thank you for the operation it's to read it!
Lottie

Author's Response: Hey Lottie!

It is, indeed, a thing. And you have, indeed, read it! Thanks so much for that! ;)

First of all, it means SO much to me that you read all the way through. That is, like, the most exciting thing ever!

And Astoria love! It makes me so happy to hear that you love my baby--my snarky, morally questionable baby! And the language. Like, oh my gracious, thank you. This review is making me smile so big. You should see the smile, because it has eclipsed my entire face and I am now nothing but an enormous grin :D

THANK YOU SO MUCH!

--Penny


 Report Review

Review #7, by AdinaPuff An Unwelcome Visitor

30th September 2014:
Hi, Penny!

I can't say I've ever read anything that is based in Hogwarts Era through the eyes of Astoria. Especially her perspective on the war. I love the feel of this story so far. It's extremely impressive and all around suspenseful in every way. It makes me wonder what is going to happen to the Greengrasses. We all know Astoria ends up with Draco (unless this is an AU) but I still would love to know how this plays out. I'll be reading on!

Thanks for the swap! :)

-Leigh

Author's Response: Hey Leigh!

Thanks! It's lovely to hear that you enjoyed the feel of the story. Atmosphere is super important to me, so that means a lot! I will reveal nothing about who ends up with whom, because then where would the suspense be, but I do hope you read on!

Thanks for swapping with me!

--Penny


 Report Review

Review #8, by maraudertimes The Writing On the Wall

28th September 2014:
Penny! I'm back! For our review swap a while ago that neither of us kinda fulfilled, but that's okay, I'm here now!

Okay, I loved this chapter. We're finally somewhere other than that blasted room for an entire chapter (!!!) and Ginny's there (!!!) and there's girly talk, if that's what that could be called (!!!), and there's laughing at Harry bits (!!!). Needless to say, I loved this chapter!

Okay, so first, I absolutely adored how you managed to weasel in the fact about Ginny being possessed by dear old Voldie in first year and Astoria remembering Ginny's handwriting (or at least, it was familiar to her) because I thought it lent so much to the story arch and canon plot and it was just something I've never really seen mentioned before.

Then Ginny's reaction and her reasoning for it was beautiful and exactly what Ginny Weasley would say. You really do have two strong characters in this scene, but the way you've written them is flawless and both have equal say and each matter to the scene.

The part with Peeves was perfect, especially when Astoria said to always have a backup plan. That's just perfect and I really liked ho wit was Astoria "saving the day" instead of Ginny who (like a Gryffindor) didn't really think things through, she just did something impulsively. It really says something about each girls' personalities and their houses, which is really cool to see.

I also love that Astoria kind of has a friendship/connection to Ginny, because I do think (at least with the girls in your story), that after the war if both were still alive, they could bery well be great friends.

Anyways, I absolutely adored this chapter and I'm so excited for the next! Get it up soon, yeah?

Oh and I just checked the forums and you responded to my review swap for today! Hooray!

And also I loved this. Don't know if I said that yet!
Lo :)

Author's Response: Hello!

Ha, at least we got around to the swap eventually ; )

I know! We left the parlor. For a *whole* chapter! Let freedom ring! And if it was Astoria's least-favorite room *before*...

We can totally call it girly talk. Ah, the laughing at Harry bits were so fun to write! So far, the story hasn't leant itself to much humor, aside from, like, irony. I enjoyed getting to break that up a little, and I'm *so* glad that you liked it, too!

Thank you! I'm glad you liked the cannon details. I think that the Voldie-related trauma probably *was* a huge factor for Ginny's development. I also think it would have really impacted her decisions in books 5-7, so it was cool to explore how that might have applied to her involvement with the D.A.

Thanks! Aw, that means a lot. I really wanted them to balance, so I tried really hard to get that right.

Yay! That is exactly what I was trying to do there! You got it! (*cue happy dance*) I really wanted to highlight the different houses and how they relate to one another. Astoria and Ginny very much belong in their respective houses, and that creates an interesting dynamic. And hey, Slytherin characteristics can be useful sometimes! Like you said, it's Astoria who saves the day!

They definitely could be! But we shall have to see...

You did say that, and thank you so much for it. This was such a lovely and encouraging review! Made my day!

--Penny



 Report Review

Review #9, by whisper in the wind The Writing On the Wall

27th September 2014:
Im taking back my life. Were taking back this school. Im not eleven years old anymore. This time, He doesnt get to control me. This time, Im going to fight. --> GINNY IS EVERYTHING.

That line...I felt Ginny's soul in that line. It was the same Ginny that JKR wrote and you just took her and you let her bloom in this story and I love that. We get to see her and understand her complexities. You show us that Ginny is strong and she's brave and loyal...but it's not only because she's a Gryffindor. It's because she suffered trauma at a young age and she's not going to sit there and be a victim for the rest of her life. She's going to make her own choice.

Thank you, thank you, thank you for doing Astoria and Ginny so much justice in this chapter. I was really looking forward to it. You didn't sacrifice either of their personalities for the sake of the other. You've really written some amazing and REAL female characters and I appreciate that so much. For example, since the story is written from Astoria's perspective, we only get to see in Ginny what Astoria sees. And yes, Ginny is brave and strong, but you show us that she is also vulnerable, and obviously so. There's nothing wrong with a woman who can kick butt and think about her complicated relationship with a boy.

Seriously, amazing job with your characterization. Keep up the fantastic work!

And the snippet for the next chapter has me screaming internally. Can't wait! xx

Author's Response: Whisper! Yay! I'm so excited that you liked this chapter!!!

Ginny IS everything. I'm so glad that we're on the same page about that :D

It means a lot to me that you think I got Ginny's character right. That's been a big goal for me in this story. I really want to keep the characters true to who they are in the books, but still be able to show different sides to them/expand on the details given to us in the series. So I really can't even tell you how much that compliment means to me. Thank you.

And also, you GET IT! That's exactly what I wanted to get across. Ginny's story is so much more than being the only Weasley girl, or being shy and becoming outgoing. She underwent a really horrific experience and came out of it so much stronger. I think she's such an an awesome character!

I loved writing this chapter. It was so fun to write a longer scene for the two of them. It isn't always easy, though, and I was really worried about making sure Astoria and Ginny were evenly matched. I also wanted to be true to the trajectory of their characters. I knew they couldn't be friendly in that first conversation in chapter 3--neither of them are naive or overly trusting--but I like seeing them kind of tiptoe around it, until this point, when we really see the possibility of a real friendship start to blossom.

Seriously, this is one of the best reviews I've gotten, ever. Ever ever. I'm just...I can't even! Thank you so, so, SO much!

--Penny


 Report Review

Review #10, by Gabriella Hunter The Stolen Truth

26th September 2014:
HELLO!

This is Gabbie here with our swap and I'd been meaning to sneak on over here and see how your Astoria was doing. I hope that I didn't skip a chapter but I'm pretty sure that I didn't...

So, the battle of minds is still going on with Astoria and Draco. I really like how his thoughts twist and turn, you really get a sense of how much he's changed since the previous year. There's a sort of weary patience about him that I find really interesting, I think he's so sly that you don't pick up on his own fear though, which can prove dangerous. His knowledge of the Greengrass's and their past was a good little peek into his mind as well, the Death Eaters have far too much knowledge and I feel like Astoria is being pushed into a position she won't be able to talk herself out of.

It's obvious that what she had revealed to Ginny is coming back to bite her. The Weasley family is under careful observation but I think I cursed really, really loudly when Draco pulled out those Extendable Ears. I wasn't expecting that but oh, he just seemed so smug about it all, didn't he? What I did like about that entire scene was that he was able to sense that Astoria was an opponent that wasn't at all like her sister or anyone else he had encountered. They're an interesting pair, I think, they counter one another with enough wit and secrets to keep me reading, I never know what might happen next.

What I was worried about though was that little bit with Felix. What did he really hear coming from the Department of Mysteries? Is he just a bit mad with grief? Hm...

I'm really worried though about what Draco might have seen in her mind or what might be revealed. I didn't expect him to use that against her but then again, that was why it was such a shock! I am so worried about Astoria right now though and plus, we have that ever pressing feeling of someone arriving and that might not bode well.

This was a good chapter, I can't wait to see you again! :D

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Whoo-oo-oo-ooo-hoo! Answerin' reviews! Reviews for which the answers are so very overdue-oo!

*grins sheepishly*

You didn't skip a chapter : )
--Did I have a weird transition or something, that made it seem like that might be the case? Let me know. I definitely want to clean things up if they're unclear!

"Weary patience". I like it! It's a good way to describe Draco at this point. He's been pretty miserable for the better part of 2 years, and at this point he's just kind of numb, waiting it out. That's part of why Astoria so intrigues him. She makes him sit up and pay attention for the first time in a while.

You're so good at spotting danger--great self-preservation instincts. You're certain you're not a Slytherin?

That knowledge certainly is not a good thing for Astoria. Draco's had some aces tucked away, and we get to see some of that in this chapter. Like with the Ears. Ohmygosh, I love that the moment he throws that out got such a strong response! Muahahaha!

Draco definitely *sees* Astoria. On the one hand, it's kind of bad, since she definitely prefers to be unseen and, currently, she has a lot to hide. But that is exactly the thing that makes them such great foils for one another. They're both observant, Astoria because she's been trained to be, Draco because he's *had* to be (people are very curse-happy in DeathEaterville. It's a place where you can afford a lot of mistakes).

And I'm so glad that you think they are an interesting pair. I do like to keep people on the edge of their seats (Have I already used up my evil laugh quota? No? Muahahahaha!)

Oh, Felix. Did he hear something? Is he mad?
--Why not both?

Oh, good, worry! You should be worried. Worry is a highly appropriate response ; )

A shock, you say? I...don't think I'm going to be able to resist...nope, here it comes...

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Thanks so much for the review, chicadee!

--Penny


 Report Review

Review #11, by Ohpl The Writing On the Wall

25th September 2014:
Wow.Great chapter.Loved the humor in the Ginny /Astoria conversations.Looking forward to more.

Author's Response: Thanks so much for saying so! I really appreciate it. And thank you for reading. I'm really glad that you enjoyed it!

--Penny


 Report Review

Review #12, by Gabriella Hunter The Malediction Perfidious

24th September 2014:
HELLO!

This is Gabbie with our swap and I'm really glad to be back, I'd been intending on stopping by really soon. I was wondering how your Astoria was doing and this is really getting good! I am seriously going to start pulling out my hair if I don't find out what happens next. :D

So, I like that you started this chapter from Draco's POV. I wasn't expecting it at all and I think that you worked his own fears in really well, he's not nearly as cocky and unbearable here. He seems very grounded and with all the horrible things happening to him at home, he's more vigilant than ever. I noticed that he was paying very close attention to Astoria and he's not nearly as easy to fool as she might believe. I think she's going to have to be careful about how the rest of this interview goes and with someone on the way...I've got myself tensed for the next chapter.

The surprise for me in this chapter of course was the attack on Astoria. I was really concerned and worried that she was in some major danger but what happened after was just...it was written so well that my jaw dropped. Astoria is capable and strong but to see her weakened like that and unable to figure out a reason was really painful. I thought that maybe the Carrows had attacked her but the truth was even more horrifying! I can't believe her mother did that to her but bravo for twisting up the Unbreakable Vow, I wasn't expecting that either. It was wonderfully written as well and I'm wondering if Astoria will have some explaining once she's out of the hospital. I'm sure that her father had no idea but if he finds out, he's not going to be happy and it might open up more wounds for the family. I like that we got to see Daphne in this chapter as well and she seemed rather empty headed to me, I hope we get a bit more from her character.

But what a twist! You really took me for a loop with this chapter and I'm seriously blown away by this. It's probably my favorite chapter so far, I can't wait to see what happens next!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hey chicadee!

Sorry. I don't think I've ever been this slow at responding to reviews. Real life is intent on snatching up all my time.

Please don't pull your hair out, because that sounds painful, but I'm excited that this chapter has apparently caused Strong Emotion!

Oh, whew! I am really pleased that you liked the POV switch. I was hoping people would, even though it was throwing something a little different in there, for sure. But, to me, it felt necessary. Draco's a good liar, too, so understanding his character would be difficult if you didn't get to hear his thoughts.

Thanks! I always thought that Draco would be a lot less cocky on the inside than he projected when he was around Harry. Because Draco wanted to be big man on campus, and Harry was his greatest threat, so of course he'd puff up his feathers when the competition was nearby. Besides, while he did genuinely think he was hot stuff back at Hogwarts, by now he's seen a lot. DeathEaterville is not a happy place. And I think that would have a big effect on Draco, who, by all appearances, had always had things fairly easy until Half-Blood Prince. He's had to step up his focus (CONSTANT VIGILANCE!) to survive among Voldemort's ranks, especially since, when he was drafted into the job, Lucius had just failed massively and the Malfoy name wasn't worth so very much.

Astoria definitely needs to be careful with him. Very, very careful.

I'm so glad that you enjoyed that twist! It was definitely something painful for Astoria. She really idolized her mother--was willing to go to some pretty extreme lengths to avenge her death, only to find out that Lavinia betrayed her. It's unlikely to help her trust issues, for sure. In fact, it's lucky that Ginny got in there before Astoria slammed her emotional doors completely shut. If she hadn't shown up to check on her and give her some good news, I think Astoria might have been a lot worse off, in the long run.

I cannot reveal too much about Daphne or their father, but you will see more of both of them. I'll let you draw your own conclusions about how Felix might react to that kind of information. You'll meet him in a few chapters and he is...an interesting fellow.

I'm so, so, SO excited that this was your favorite chapter! Thank you! It was a real challenge, and I really wanted to get it just right, so I am just so glad you enjoyed reading it!

Thank you so much for this absolutely lovely review, Gabbie! You're the best evil twin a girl could ask for ; )

--Penny


 Report Review

Review #13, by maraudertimes A Family Affair

23rd September 2014:
Review swap! Again! I really love how I'm finally able to continue reading and reviewing this. I really like this story!

Okay, so the start was really sad, especially seeing Astoria, who is so strong and fierce, go through such extensive hardships after the incidents. The part with Tilly made me a little happier though because it always makes me feel better when families treat their house elves properly.

Meeting Felix Greengrass was a little different to say the least. I think he's a smart man but he seems to have some really bad memory problems, so I hope that gets better. I liked his comments on muggles. Although it's probably dangerous for him to think like that, I respect him a lot (even if he doesn't know that voicing those opinions could get him killed).

The final ending with Astoria and her ancestor/portrait was really touching. It showed how much she cared for her father to have Tilly hide the books instead of getting rid of them, all in order to please her father but also protect him.

I really liked this chapter and I'm still really loving the concept and characters you've created. It's really awesome and I know the next chapter will be just as awesome!
Lo :)

Author's Response: Hello hello!

It *is* sad. Astoria has a lot on her plate. Like you say, she's a very strong person, and I think it's not till you see the burdens she's shouldering--besides interviews with Death Eaters--that you get to see just how strong she really is.

Felix is certainly intelligent, but he's not all there in the head. The stress of losing his wife made him really retreat into himself, and now his brain has just kind of re-wired around the things it can't cope with. He's a bit mad, but he's still a lovely person. Felix probably has the best heart of any of the Greengrasses.

I'd definitely respect Felix for what he says, and I'm happy that you do, too. Even if he hasn't grasped the dangers of the current political climate, his views would not be popular among his peers. He's brave to believe differently from them, and to be willing to voice his opinions. I'd say he isn't perfect; he's still a bit patronizing toward Muggles, though he does recognize that the innovations they've made to survive in spite of their lack of magic are quite spectacular. But still, his views are far and away better than those held by most of Pureblood society.

I'm glad you liked that part! It's a moment of growth for Astoria. Her instinct is usually to eliminate threats. This is the second time that she has been willing to deviate from that pattern for the sake of someone she cares about.

Thank you so much. I'm really happy that you're enjoying it, and a appreciate your confidence. Hopefully the next chapter *will* be just as enjoyable. I'll keep my fingers crossed.

Thanks again for the swap!

--Penny


 Report Review

Review #14, by maraudertimes A Changing Tide

22nd September 2014:
Hiya, here for the review swap!

Ohmigoodness, I think Draco likes Astoria! ;) It was really cool to see that he didn't attack her straight away after she pulled the poker on him, especially since his wand was right there. He's intrigued by her and obviously wants to learn more about her and her situation.

I just absolutely love Astoria. She's such a great character. She's feisty and hard, but also so emotional and I just absolutely love this story. Ugh it's been so long since I've read it.

The end with Greyback was probably my least favourite part just because of Greyback, but I loved how Draco handled it. It just shows the power he can command because of his blood status and his position in Voldemort's (oops!) ranks. And just the fact that he lied for her and saved her from Greyback? *squee* It's a weird thing to want and a weird thing to think cute or desirable but it is. :)

And yay! Finally leaving the parlour. I'm so excited for the next one! This one was so jam-packed and hopefully I can continue reading this because I really like it! I'm always just so amazed and in awe of your writing skills. Keep it up because this is awesome!

Lo :)

Author's Response: Hey!

Ohmygoodness, I think he might ;)

Thank you so much! Like, so, SO much. That really means a lot.

Ick. Greyback. I understand the sentiment. And it's nice to see Draco putting all that arrogance to good use for once, isn't it?

Bahaha. Oops is right. I'm just gonna go hide over here, and if the Snatchers come, you never saw me, right?

It *is* a weird thing to find cute or desirable, but I'm totally on the same page. "Oh, Draco, the way you boss werewolves around is sooo dreamy. *swoons*"
...Look, some girls appreciate flowers. Some like chocolates. And some prefer to be rescued from certain death. But that's fine. It's apples and oranges, really.

Thank you so much for your kind words, Lo! I'm so glad you're enjoying the story!

--Penny


 Report Review

Review #15, by nott theodore A Changing Tide

21st September 2014:
Hi Penny! I'm here for our review swap - it's been far too long since I got to read some more of this lovely story!

Wow, this was a really eventful chapter to come back to! I loved the way that you opened it, with just that one word - 'Darkness'. It had such an impact and instantly had me worrying about what was going to happen to Astoria now that she's been found out as a traitor by Draco. She's in a really perilous position now, and although I know that she must get out of this in some way because she goes on to marry Draco in the future, I was still really worried about her!

I have to say once again that I loved your description throughout this chapter! You have a lovely writing style and it was great to see all the unusual comparisons and descriptions that you included which evoked such vivid pictures in my mind.

I thought Astoria managed to get out of her predicament really well at the beginning of the chapter - at least showing she's got guts, and that she's not just going to stand back and let things happen to her. Even if a poker might not be the best weapon against a wand :P I admit though, I was surprised that Draco had his wand all along and didn't even try to defend himself against her attack, because he could so easily have done so.

I think that my favourite thing about this chapter was the development that seems to have been made in it. They're only just leaving the parlour here and yet there's so much obvious development in their characters and their strange sort of relationship as well, and I find it absolutely fascinating that there's so much progress been made already.

It was so intriguing to see Draco make sure that she didn't say the name Voldemort - such a change, and I'm sure that he didn't even realise why he'd done it in the first place. I found the way that you wrote that part very convincing, as I think there are sparks and the definite potential for some romance to develop in the future between them from what we've seen already.

It was so scary when Draco realised that the others were already coming to try and take Astoria, even though I did believe him when he said he hadn't called them and told them that she was a traitor. I also found the explanation about why they're investigating 'traitors' in the way that they are really interesting - I can imagine it being very plausible, that they would need money to pay the Snatchers and the others who are working for Voldemort primarily for the monetary gain.

It was really touching to read about how much Astoria cares for her family, too. I felt so sorry for her as she was begging and pleading for Draco to spare her father at least - even if she doesn't like them that much, or get on very well with them, she still loves them deep down and is driven by that to some extent too. She'll protect them as long as she can, and I can see that in the character I imagine as Scorpius's mother and Draco's wife. I feel sorry for her to have so much responsibility laid on her shoulders when she's only young - the youngest in her family, in fact.

Fenrir Greyback... ugh, he was so creepy. You wrote him really well, though, and gave me goosebumps reading about his attitude to Astoria and wanting to be able to have his way and it was just so horrible to read but really well written since Fenrir Greyback is an awful character!

I'm so glad that Draco managed to convince Fenrir Greyback that she's innocent and actually stood up to him! It's so brave really and it's taken a lot for him to do that - as he said, he's now a traitor for having done it. I just hope that he'll be alright because of it, since he can't actually say why he's done it yet. In the future, though, I'm sure that it's going to be something that'll bring the two of them together.

I'm really intrigued by what's coming next, too! I'm pleased that Astoria's safe for now and that there's been so much progress and so much happening between them in this chapter, all with great writing. I'll try to get back soon to carry on reading!

Sian :)

Author's Response: Sian! You leave such fabulous reviews. I'm so sorry for the delay in answering them.

Thank you so much! I really spend a lot of time looking for the right analogies and rhythms, so that compliment means a lot to me. I'm so glad that you enjoy the style!

I think that if Draco had really felt endangered, he would have used his wand. But he knew that he had the advantage. As far as he knows, Astoria doesn't have a wand on her at all, and though Draco has no intention of underestimating her, he's pretty confident in his dueling skills. And, with that in mind, he could afford to be intrigued. He's seen a lot while doing this job in the past year, but no one has ever reacted quite like Astoria, and that fascinated him. He wanted to see what else she would do.

I am *delighted* that you think the development is going well. That's important to me, since obviously there's a lot of room for these two to grow. I certainly don't want to rush things, so feel free to let me know if you ever feel that someone's growth/choices strike you unrealistic.

Yeah, that was a fun part. Before, I think you can tell that they are well-matched as opponents, but I think that's the moment when you first really get to see the sparks, the possibility ; )

I'm glad you found the premise plausible. It was one just an idea that struck me: people are greedy, and Voldemort is employing some of the lowest, greediest types of people. Fanatical devotion is all very well for people like Bellatrix, but most of his followers aren't really the "devotion" type. They're out for what they can get. So I thought Voldemort would need ways of providing for his forces, and ways to pay back his "investors". Killing Muggles/the Muggle families of Muggle-borns can't bring in much money, since what they had would all be in Muggle currency. The ones who really have cash are the Purebloods themselves. So I thought they'd be knocking people off--whoever wasn't useful. The Greengrasses could easily find themselves on that list, now that Lavinia is gone. She was useful, but Felix is a shut-in, and he's gone a bit mad, so he's not worth much to the Death Eaters.
Now, the Greengrass' money outweighs their possible contributions.

Draco was curious about whether she was guilty or not, but all along, he knew it didn't really matter. However, if everyone he and his team interviewed was killed, then the Purebloods would catch on to what was happening, and they would be angry, so theoretically, he does have some say in who gets killed and who gets a reprieve. It's just that normally it comes down to whether or not Greyback is out for blood that day. This is the first time that Draco has actually asserted his authority when they showed up without Draco calling them.

Thank you. Fenrus was fun to write, but it creeped me out, too. Like, serious shivers. Ick.

It was brave of Draco! Someone give that boy a round of applause--positive reinforcement is key. I thought it made sense in his character arc, especially in light of the next chapter.

Thank you so very much for your LOVELY review. I am always glad to get your thoughts and opinions! Sending you a huge hug of thanks!

--Penny



 Report Review

Review #16, by Gabriella Hunter A Dangerous Revelation

21st September 2014:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums with your review and it feels so good to be back. It hasn't been that long since I read the last chapter but I've been really eager about continuing and I love what you've done here. Our Astoria's continue to be the same but yours is so cunning and a bit ruthless when she needs to be! I adore it.

I'm a bit worried about the conversation that she's having with Draco at the moment. THere's something about him that's making me uneasy, it's probably just because he's so calm about everything, he's not rushing for information or making any idle threats. Also, the thought of him in glasses makes me giggle. That had nothing at all to do with anything but I feel like Draco is the one probing for information and playing Astoria, I wonder what will happen next.

Astoria really shocked me in this chapter, I never expected her to actually take this kind of risk. I liked all the canon that you included in this chapter as well but it felt very dangerous while I was reading and I thought of Hogwarts as more of a prison. It certainly added to the feel of the chapter too and by the time she was talking to Ginny, I was really tense. The back and forth between the two of them was really well-written, I got enough of Ginny's character and Astoria's acting was really amazing. I liked that she saw how genuine Ginny was though and told her about what happened to her mother, I wonder if she'll regret that decision later but from the way this chapter ended, I'm more worried about the information that she gave away.

Can't wait for the next one!

Thanks so much for the read!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hey Gabbie! I'™m so glad you're back, too!

You probably *should* be worried ;)

Do you think I should cut the glasses thing? It's just how the scene popped into my head, but you're not the first to mention it, and I don't want it to pull people out of the flow of the story. Or do you think it'™s good to let them have a bit of a chuckle there?

I think that, for the people who were back at Hogwarts while Harry, Ron, and Hermione were gallivanting through the country side on the Camping Trip of Doom, Hogwarts probably did feel like a prison. I'm glad that feeling came through.

In some ways, Astoria shocked herself in this chapter. Her self-preservation instincts are strong, but maybe the one thing that can override them is her devotion to her family. The Death Eaters betrayed her mother, and I imagine that Purebloods are very big on things like "the family honor" and avenging the dead. I think of them like the de Medicis in Italy. They don't play. According to the dictates by which she was raised, Astoria had to do *something* once she found out that Lavinia was killed by a Death Eater curse. Her father is in no state to avenge his wife, and her sister is pretty useless. So Astoria does what she always does--she handles it.

Thank you so much! It makes me so happy that you liked that exchange. It was fun to write--tricky, but fun.

Probably you should be worried about that, too. Just worry about Astoria, in general ; )

Thank YOU so much for the review!

--Penny


 Report Review

Review #17, by GingeredTea An Unwelcome Visitor

20th September 2014:
This was a really intriguing first chapter and certainly compelling enough to make me want to keep reading. I loved the beginning scene. The way you introduced Draco into the story and went onto describe him, fit the mood of the story perfectly. Everything was fantastically constructed in this chapter. :) Can't wait to read more.

Author's Response: Thank you! I really appreciate the positive feedback, and I'd love for you to read more. If you ever want to do another swap or anything, just let me know!

--Penny


 Report Review

Review #18, by whisper in the wind A Family Affair

20th September 2014:
You paint lovely pictures. I could see everything clearly in my head. 10 points to Slytherin for that! Speaking of which, I'm also a Slytherin! Small world, eh?

I love the mother/son relationship between Draco and Narcissa. Even in such a bleak world as theirs, they still have that loving bond. I wish he would run away, but I think he is doing the noble thing by staying for his family's sake. But I do hope he never shoots to kill. I want his soul to stay intact.

I can't wait to see more Ginny! I think all the pieces in this story are coming together nicely.

Author's Response: Thank you! I really appreciate that.

I didn't know you were a Slytherin! Go snakes!

I love that, too. I really wanted to explore Slytherin qualities in this, so one thing that's huge is loyalty. Gryffindors are loyal in a far-reaching way, but Slytherins are intensely loyal to a select few, often their families. So that definitely plays a big role in this story. In the Malfoys' case, it's one of their biggest redeeming qualities.

I always felt particularly bad for Draco, because even though he was unpleasant, what happens to him in the end isn't entirely his fault. He's brainwashed all his life by people he trusts, who tell him that being a Death Eater is awesome. Then, he gets assigned to kill Dumbledore, and it is *not awesome*. I think it's pretty clear that he doesn't want to do it. But he's being used to punish Lucius, who is already on thin ice with Voldemort, so he can't really risk disobeying. That scene where Dumbledore offers him the opportunity to turn around is so tragic, because the scene is cut short. He never really gets that chance to choose. (I'm not sure he could have put his trust in the Order--it would have been hard--but I do believe that if Dumbledore'd had a few more minutes to talk it over with him, it COULD have changed everything). Really, so much of what Draco wanted to do was just to protect his family, because that was *always* Goal #1 for the Malfoys. It doesn't excuse all his bullying, but I think he's still a tragic figure, nonetheless.

Heeheehee. Seriously, I'm refreshing constantly. I'm really eager to see the next chapter come up, and to see how people like the increased Ginny presence.

Thanks so much! It means a lot that you think so. And thank you SO much for reviewing!

--Penny





 Report Review

Review #19, by Gabriella Hunter The Lady of Greengrass Hall

19th September 2014:
HellO!

This is Gabbie from the forums with your review and I'm hoping that I'm not that late with this! I was trying to get rid of a cold and it was honestly kicking my butt last night and I was forced to just go to sleep and dream of cartoons and Percy Weasley.

*Ahem*

So, I really loved what you've done with this chapter. It's just as interesting as the first but maybe a bit more because of the fact that we learn more about Lavinia and what resulted in a very suspicious death. I like that when you started out this chapter, you gave more details on her backstory and I was able to get a real understanding of her motivations and her character. She seemed like a very proud, intelligent woman and I felt a bit miffed that she was never allowed to really follow her passion. It brought your world into clearer focus and is, once again, making it plain that the Wizarding world is set in a time that has passed the rest of the world by.

The back and forth that you give with the flashbacks also gave me a clearer understanding of Astoria's position. Knowing about her mother's secret life of course made her far more aware of her surroundings and the actions of others, though it makes me wonder if she would be in some sort of danger as well. If the people who murdered her mother find out about her, Astoria might be targeted next. Or at the very least, her family.

I think that Astoria is very clever but Draco is far more perceptive than she thinks. I'm certain that he's catching on to her but I want to know what she did to backstab the Death Eaters and what that would mean for the future. I hope you go into more detail in the next few chapters because I'm really curious

Astoria's thoughts on Muggles was very well-written and didn't come off as biased at all. I could understand that her reasoning was based off of what she had experienced and seen and while she doesn't care much for Muggles or Muggle-borns, it's obvious that she sees just how evil Voldemort is. She lost a mother and now she's out for revenge. I don't know how perfect that is but it's going to make for a wonderful story so I hope you request soon!

I didn't spot any CC's either so good job!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hey Gabbie! This is not late. This was extremely quick! I'm super impressed. I hope you're feeling better! Percy, hmm? Now that's an interesting choice. Why Percy, in particular?

I'm glad that chapter 2 is at least as interesting as chapter 1! And I'm glad that you thought the peek at Lavinia's backstory worked well. Astoria was very much her mother's protege, so I thought it was vital to understand Lavinia if one wanted to understand Astoria's upbringing. Plus, I really wanted to explore morally grey characters and, as you'll see, on the grey scale Lavinia is pretty much charcoal. But I'm really happy that you felt upset on her behalf! She may not be good, exactly, but she is interesting, and I think at least some of her motivations are pretty understandable. Some...maybe less so.

You're clever to pick up that Astoria might be in danger from multiple sides. As ever, I make no promises. But it's a good thought.

I'm really enjoying the way you're reading these two, but I won't tell you if you're right or wrong. I'll leave that up to your interpretation of the next few chapters! I *can* promise you that you'll find more detail about the backstabbing, and what that might mean if Draco were to figure things out.

I'm really glad that Astoria's views came off well! I didn't think it was reasonable that, as a Slytherin Pureblood and the daughter of a Death Eater, she'd be outraged at the way Muggles/Muggleborns were treated. After all, she's primarily out for herself and her family. However, Astoria is an unusually clear-sighted individual, so I thought she'd be able to plainly see that there were very good witches and wizards whose blood was far from pure. She isn't perfect, and I didn't want her to be. Astoria doesn't think she's a particularly good person. Maybe she isn't. But she definitely has some admirable qualities, and plenty of room for growth.


Thank you so much for your very thoughtful review! I'll definitely be re-requesting!

Thanks again, evil twin!

--Penny



 Report Review

Review #20, by whisper in the wind A Changing Tide

18th September 2014:
GROSS UGLY SOBBING ON THE TRAIN!!!

I just read this chapter on my phone in basically 2 point font. All of the emotions going through me right now...I just cannot deal. From the beginning, I had no idea where this chapter could have gone so that Astoria would end up living. The last thing I expected was for Draco to lie for her! I'm so happy you don't even understand!!!

This story is everything to me.

Author's Response: Bahaha! I'm so honored, first of all, that you'd suffer through 2 point font to read my story. And to have caused such emotional turmoil (can you tell I'm a Slytherin?)!

I am so happy that YOU are happy. That was a killer chapter to write. Draco is conflicted. At this point, even *he's* confused about why he did it. But yes. Plot twist!

I really cannot even form the words to express how delighted I am that you liked it. This review has made my...well, not just day. Possibly my week. Maybe longer! You don't even know.

Thank you so much! And thank you for review bombing me. It's the absolute best!

--Penny


 Report Review

Review #21, by whisper in the wind The Stolen Truth

18th September 2014:
OMG WHAT NO! what? what!? I don't understand what could possibly happen after this besides a quick avada kedavra. I'm freaking out here! I'm in class trying not to show any emotion (Astoria style) but inside I'm screaming lol.

Again, you're amazing! Honestly, I can't stress enough how talented you are. The back and forth between Astoria and Draco flows really well and it shows just how much chemistry they have. She intrigues him because he hasn't come across anyone like her before. I like it.

Oh, and I loved the line: "Perhaps they were discussing the remarkable freshness of their lawn!"

Author's Response: This review is the *best* thing about actually having people read your writing. I love getting to read emotional responses to the story!

Astoria would be so proud of you right now!

Thank you. A lot. I enjoy reading your stuff so much. It means a lot to get praise from someone that I think is totally awesome! I've been addicted to Tangled Web ever since I came across it.

I love their chemistry. They really challenge each other. I don't think Astoria's ever met a boy as opaque as Draco, and she's certainly a far cry from the types he's been dealing with, as you say. There's a lot of posturing and poking at the chinks in the armor, which is fun to do, but those to are definitely well-matched combatants. ; )

Hahaha! Yay! I always loved that line, but I wasn't sure that anyone else would find it funny. I'm so glad that you do!

--Penny


 Report Review

Review #22, by whisper in the wind The Malediction Perfidious

18th September 2014:
Ahh!!! It's been a long time since I've read words that actually satisfied me. I cannot get over your talent in writing. You weave the words together perfectly. I'm enjoying this story so much for the content, so it is definitely an added bonus that it's written so well.

Ginny + Astoria give me life. I've never read a story with them together before. It's intriguing. I want them to be superheros together. Or best friends. Something!!!

I'm interested in seeing what Draco intends to do with all of this information. He seems to be on the fence about this whole death eater thing.

On to the next chapter! :)

Author's Response: Oh my goodness, thank you! That really means so, so much.

Ginny + Astoria is everything. I love writing scenes with the two of them, and I am SO happy that you love them, too. In my earliest drafts, when I was still getting a feel for things, they weren't really a factor. Then I was like, "Who do you go to in order to contact the OoP?" and Ginny seemed like the obvious choice. So I put them in a room together and BOOM! They just played off each other so well that I knew there had to be more. :D

This whole "Death Eater" thing has not been good to Draco. He made a decent garden variety bully (you know, if your garden includes venomous tentacula and such), but actually killing and torturing and all the horrible things that Voldemort's followers do? Draco's a bit delicate for that. This is a boy whose how-to-deal repertoire was, "My father will hear about this!", and Lucius is no longer a playable card. He's had to do a lot of growing up in a very short time. He doesn't love being a Death Eater like he always thought he would, but he wants to live and to protect his family, and following Voldemort seems like the best way to meet those ends to him.

Thank you so much for your review!!! It really made me smile.

--Penny


 Report Review

Review #23, by whisper in the wind A Dangerous Revelation

18th September 2014:
hello! Okay, so I am constantly on the edge of my seat with every sentence. Astoria's character reminds me of Ginny's in so many ways. I love Ginny, by the way. She's my favorite character in the books, hands down. I love how Astoria is so guarded compared to the people around her and that being raised by a spy has really impacted her life in such a prominent way. I think she's going to do great things with the information that she has, and it's so believable that she would go to Ginny for all of this. They're both such strong personalities and although Astoria has chosen to trust Ginny, Ginny has to consciously make that decision. She's given Ginny quite the responsibility now and I really hope she makes the right choice.

Honestly, your writing style flows like poetry. The flashback was well placed and I could see time warping like a pensieve. I am absolutely loving all of these characters. Even your portrayal of Draco is astounding. I can sense his typical frigidness and the exhaustion from the situation of the war. He seems like he's over all this investigating for the death eaters.

I'm so glad I finally have a break from my school work to really, finally, get into this story. You are an amazing author.

Author's Response: Oh hi! Yay for surprise reviews. And I'm always excited to hear from one of my favorite writers!

I adore Ginny. She doesn't get near enough credit, because she doesn't have a huge amount of spoken lines in the books. But she's very strong, she has a sense of humor, and she won't take...ahem..."nonsense" from anyone. I admire that.

Astoria and Ginny make good foils for each other in this story, I think, because of their similarities AND because of their differences. Astoria is also strong. She wouldn't laugh at the gag stuff that Ginny learned to, growing up with 6 brothers, but they both appreciate dark, dry humor. And Astoria will put up with people's nonsense if she must, but she'll always be looking for a way to turn it back on them.

The biggest differences between Ginny and Astoria are that they have different values. Ginny values bravery and outspokenness. Astoria values cleverness and knowing when to hold your tongue. Astoria sees things less in black and white--it's all shades of grey to her--and she doesn't see herself as a particularly good person. And, of course, Astoria *is* a bit of a snob, while Ginny is pretty down to earth. I love writing scenes with the two of them because they really balance one another out nicely.

Thank you so much! Oh, I love that description. Thanks. And I'm so glad you like the portrayal of Draco. I hope you continue to like it in later chapters (although always feel free to tell me if there's something I should change)! He's a bit tricky, because I want to show character growth and such, but we are in the Deathly Hallows time period, so I can't depart too much from what's in the books. Always a tightrope act. So am DELIGHTED that you think it's going well. :D

Thank you for reading and reviewing, and for all your kind words! I hope you continue to enjoy the story.

P.S. Chapter 8 is in the queue and, if you love Ginny (and if I wrote it right), that might be a chapter you'd particularly enjoy.

--Penny


 Report Review

Review #24, by Gabriella Hunter An Unwelcome Visitor

17th September 2014:
Hello!

This is Gabbie from the forums with our swap! I am really delighted to actually have stopped by because I don't come across many Astoria Greengrass stories on the archives. I feel like she never gets much love but that might be because we don't really know much about her, other than the fact that she's Draco's wife later on.

Now, I think that we need to stop swapping brains as well because there are a lot of similarities between your Astoria and mine. Its actually pretty scary! I was really intrigued by the weight of secrets and the way you talked about her family, its almost the same as the way I've written mine. There are some differences but I think this is going to be a fun story for me to read, I like having random mind melds with other authors with the same characters! :D

Now, from the very beginning I think that I got the sense that Astoria was a very capable girl. The beginning with her mother had me a bit unsettled though, parents have a way of bending their children and scaring them with lies. Its interesting because that comes into play later and I thought that that was a smooth transition for the rest of the chapter.

I wasnt' sure what was happening at first when Astoria was putting on her act, I honestly thought that she was about to be forced into a marriage but thank goodness, that didn't happen. I was really curious to see Draco but also a bit worried, I had a feeling that the visit wasn't going to be a pleasant one. I was half right of course and Astoria's wavering loyalties can be a dangerous thing and I hope that she manages to pull things off. Draco is withdrawn and depressed here and I'm curious to know more about what he's been going through, I also like the comparisons you've made with how different he was back at Hogwarts and now. It makes his decline all the more noticeable.

I didn't spot any CC's or anything and I think you've started off really well for this story. Your story is mysterious, your characters are unique and I think that you've got some great skill. :D

Thanks for the swap!

Much love,

Gabbie

Author's Response: Hey Gabbie! Okay, I was super excited as soon as I clicked on your link, too, because I was like, "Oh, another Astoria story. Cool!" Like you say, they aren't exactly abundant and, as far as I know, I'd never run across yours before.

And then I started reading, and I was like, "Another dark, mysterious Astoria story? Even awesomer."

I, too, was a little weirded out when I read your summary. The Twilight Zone music started playing in my head. I was like...have I found my authorly doppelgänger? Isn't that supposed to be a sign of my impending doom? Am I going to die?

However, I felt like my life was probably safe once I got further in ; ) There are differences. Still, I'll totally agree with the mind-meld thing. Secrets and family issues are definitely major themes for both! It was really fun to read your take, and see all the differences and similarities!

What? Unsettling? Early childhood indoctrination? What could be worrisome about that? ;)

Oh, gosh. I think if there was an arranged marriage on top of all this we'd have to fetch the smelling salts! (Not for Astoria. For me. There are enough plot twists to keep track of as it is. Phew.) You were totally right--this isn't a pleasant social call. There will definitely be information revealed on what Draco's been through in this time. Poor morally-compromised lamb. He's been through a lot.

Thanks so much! I'm glad you think so, and I really appreciate your thoughts. Thanks for the swap!

--Penny



 Report Review

Review #25, by daliha An Unwelcome Visitor

17th September 2014:
Chilling chapter, I wonder what was the secret Lavinia Greengrass spoke of in the begin? How did she die? Why are the Greengrasses under investigation by the Dark Lord? besides my questions I loved this chapter the description was very well done, and you nailed Draco Malofy's personality, and I loved Astoria as well. this story most definitely deserve more reviews than what it has.

Author's Response: So glad to have chilled you! Thanks.

Those are all good questions. Astoria certainly wants to know the answers. Perhaps she'll find out ;)

I am so excited that you think I nailed Draco's personality! Thank you! I tried really hard to capture his voice and describe him the right way, and I'm so glad that you think that it worked!

Thank you! Hopefully more people will stumble across it with time (that's always the hope, isn't it?) I'm really glad you think so, and I'm super grateful to everyone who has read and reviewed so far!

Thanks so much for swapping with me! It was fun!

--Penny





 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login

<Previous Page  Jump:     Next Page>