Reading Reviews for Romacning the Serpant
25 Reviews Found

Review #1, by fairy919 A Charming Night

10th December 2006:
I like it!
Please post!

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Review #2, by Katrina A Charming Night

14th December 2005:
Hey i like your story so far,, i think you should continue, it's a brilliant idea.. email me sometime or katrina grand story!!

Author's Response: aww, you guys make me want to continue! now if only i havd the bloomin time! ok i'll try to get at it after i finsh the glitter, banner and avatar some one requested form me.. argh.. need less work, lol

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Review #3, by Rhonda º¥ºIt's a new yearº¥º

11th December 2005:
continue or ill kick u in the face

Author's Response: sorry i'm doing the best i can ;)

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Review #4, by Kimberly A Charming Night

5th October 2005:
awsome chapter

Author's Response: cool thanks

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Review #5, by Kimberly º¥ºIt's a new yearº¥º

5th October 2005:
good chapter

Author's Response: glad you liked

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Review #6, by Spartan_Justice º¥ºIt's a new yearº¥º

19th April 2005:
im liking this story so far. wms. <3

Author's Response: Well thank you for the review, and i'm certianly glad tou did review. I'll wm asap! lol

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Review #7, by Ash Black A Charming Night

13th March 2005:
>> Okay, she's having sex dreams about Draco, and the next second, she's super uncomfortable with sitting next to him, which doesn't really seem to work, if you know what I mean. I know that you are writing from her (Electra's) perspective when she's thinking about Sheela and Pansy, but I'd hate for you to offend someone. Is there a reason for the two girls being homosexual? If not, and it doesn't add to your story... but maybe it will be important later. Two more things: You spelt the title incorrectly, it should be "Romancing the Serpent," not "Romacning the Serpant," unless you wanted two typoes. And a question... who is romancing who? In the first chapter, it seemed like the romancer was Electra, but now it seems to be Draco. ??? Maybe it will become apparent later. Honestly, Electra doesn't seem to be a Slytherin. She's acting more like a Hufflepuff, or a Gryffindor. Interesting story, but asking people to review after reading isn't really necessary, and makes me want to review less. Anyways, you shouldn't ask people to READ and REVIEW at the end of the chapter, they have obviously read it already! :)

Author's Response: thanx for the review.... note: this story is just a one-shot type fic.... so it's not ment to make sence. also yeah it should be Romancing The SerpAnt. The title.. as you MAY have noticed doens't work for the story? well maybe it's both right? anywayz.. thanx for the review.

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Review #8, by Ash Black º¥ºIt's a new yearº¥º

13th March 2005:
>> Interesting story, Jessika. You seem to really write a caricature of these characters, especially Draco. I know that many people see him as a complete womanizer, but from the books... anyways, you should most definitely continue. Were you being serious when you wrote, "I am devilishly han[d]ome and witty..." or ... ? Maybe you should think about adding something at the beginning of the chapter about how Electra feels about Draco, because you just say that she wanted to sit by him, and then he's kissing her. Just something to think about. I'd also look into your character a little bit more. She seems a little bit too perfect, sort of unnatural. Everyone has faults, and I'd hate for her to turn into a Mary Sue. Thanks for reading all this, and I hope you will continue with this story!

Author's Response: Mary Sue.....?????? well yeah.. i never said she was perfect, and also this story isn;t perfect and i don;'t plan on makeing that way.. so yeah.. thanx for the review.

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Review #9, by Lovely Me A Charming Night

24th February 2005:
great story :) I like it, please update soon! :) I'm looking forward to the next chapters

Author's Response: ahhh thanx a billion i'll do that asap!

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Review #10, by MissRiddle º¥ºIt's a new yearº¥º

24th February 2005:
great story :)

Author's Response: thank yeah pally!

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Review #11, by scarlet A Charming Night

21st February 2005:
hey i like your story and i hope you make the next one as soon as possible!!

Author's Response: aight thank yah!

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Review #12, by nomikkin A Charming Night

19th February 2005:
She relaxed in her comfortable mattress. And difted… I'm guessing you meant drifted. I'm confused, when she got underneath the covers were eyes closed or open, cuz that makes all the difference in a dream sequence. please add some detail so i am able to get a better understanding, it would jelp tremendously. i just got confused with it all, you know? lol

Oh, how she long for it to be Draco, how she longed to let him do as he wish with her… did you mean "how she longed"?

Electra had been so lost in thought that she couldn’t tell weather this voice was reality another typo: "weather" should be "whether".

She removed her clothes, and quickly put on her skit, shirt, tie, sweater vest, stockings, and robe, . . . you meant "skirt, shirt, tie, etc." correct? lol.

umm, okay, i just finished everything and that was one hell of a twist and a turn. i must say i use them too, but they're much more natural. it seems like you just chucked it in there. slid it into the stories to shock the readers with anticipation, not disgust sweetie. lol more criticism: you need a lot more detail, with it in here, i was kind of lost through it all. so please, add some more for future reader.

srry if i'm being a bitch by giving you all of this harsh criticism and corrections, it's just how i do things. please take no offense by any of it, i'm just trying to help and give you some pointers. remember; the more pointers from me, the better potential your story has, which is always a good thing. lol. so, you don't have to take any of this into consideration, k? much love! ;) ~nomikkin

Author's Response: holy.. i had no idea this chappie had so many mistakes! lol, wow, u sure r a good reader to catch all that, cause i know i didn't, lol. anywayz, this is only a tiny fic, and i didn't mean for it to be long and detail, i kinda did through it together, lol, sry if it sucks. well thanx for the pointers i will surely take them into concideration. Thanx for the review!

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Review #13, by xoxxKatexoxx A Charming Night

14th February 2005:
Pansy and Sheela....ewwwww.........up, into, through, into wow....lots of turns....interesting.

Author's Response: lol yuppers thanx for the review

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Review #14, by sakura storm A Charming Night

12th February 2005:
why do u do this to me u big dumb dumby head

Author's Response: yeah yeah sissy poo poo, lol, thanx for reviewin!

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Review #15, by sakura storm º¥ºIt's a new yearº¥º

12th February 2005:
why is it so short p.s. this is hondar

Author's Response: i know it's short.... but good right???

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Review #16, by Voldemorts heiress89 º¥ºIt's a new yearº¥º

7th February 2005:
ooooooo!!!!! I think I'm gonna like this story alot. It has a great plot going on already! lol! Keep going!

Author's Response: well thank ya!

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Review #17, by RedHeadMama º¥ºIt's a new yearº¥º

6th February 2005:
Good start, I always like a good Draco fic. So far he is still begin the Draco we love and hate. I don't know why you wrote it in word pad but if possible fix the errors. I have to stop and figure out what it is suppose to say and that takes away from the story. First chapters are never easy but try to make it a little longer. Will you please reveiw me too? I just posted my first fan fic and I would really like to know what people think about it. Thanks and remember always keep writing. Practice makes perfect.

Author's Response: LOL, maybe i should check the grammer and spelling for chappie one, it would probably help i guess, lol, thanx for reviewin! and i'll look at ur story asap!

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Review #18, by nomikkin º¥ºIt's a new yearº¥º

6th February 2005:
yes, the spelling and all that threw me of a bit. do try to fix that. umm, detail, my dear, you hardly have any of it in this fic. when you decribe the young girl, you should do it well . . . subtly. don't just boldly describe her; it leave little imagination for the reader. and the build up between Draco and Electra is like one step. it just all of a sudden jumped up to them both liking each other. show how gradually over the nexy few weeks or so she starts to like him and vice versa. just some advice from a harsh and picky critic. you don't have to take any of it. much love! ;) ~nomikkin

Author's Response: well, i suppose i could work on that, i do agree that it goes quite fast though, but that's what i was going for, lol, but i'll check it out, lata! and thanx for reviewin!

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Review #19, by TheScarlettLetter º¥ºIt's a new yearº¥º

4th February 2005:
Isn't it funny how fast time gets away from you(?) *chuckling* I know probably your muse has long since wandered, but I must encourage you to see this one thru, if not for the reviews of others, for yourself =)

Author's Response: hmmmm, you know wut, i thinkl ur write. I'll do that now... it may not be very long, but it'll be going somewhere, right? thanx for reviewin!

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Review #20, by SilverCloud º¥ºIt's a new yearº¥º

23rd October 2004:
Great start, definetly continue!

Author's Response: alright, i will then! thanx for reviewing!

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Review #21, by kikistos º¥ºIt's a new yearº¥º

1st June 2004:
hey this is gr8 ri te more soon plz

Author's Response: Alright... Another review! I am convinced it's good enough, lo0l well i gotta get writing! the next chapter may be a bit short, but it WILL be longer than the first! Thanx for your review Kikistos!

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Review #22, by Mimmy º¥ºIt's a new yearº¥º

3rd May 2004:
hey this is good, but too short! Write more!

Author's Response: Ok I'll write more! Thanx for your review!

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Review #23, by Tiger_Eyez º¥ºIt's a new yearº¥º

3rd May 2004:
It's ok, but there isn't enough for me to make a serious conclusion.

Author's Response: Hmmm, I guess your right, I'll have to add more or update as soon as I can. Thanx for reviewing.

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Review #24, by boo º¥ºIt's a new yearº¥º

16th April 2004:
hey, great story, love it. my advice is try to make draco a little more in character, like being more of a snob and like ummm maybe bragging, i don't really know, but gr8 start!!!!!! :)

Author's Response: Well, I really glad you like this one. Yeah I guess I should make Draco more in character, lol, i'll do that right away. Thanx for reviewing. and again I am really glad you like this...

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Review #25, by sex_machine º¥ºIt's a new yearº¥º

16th April 2004:
Alright a Draco fic... I love DRACO! this seems like it's gonna be good. Forget about wut i said about i don't like Draco/OC fics.. at least i think i said that, anywayz, good on you, update soon! I want some good scenes.

Author's Response: YES! My first REVIEW FOR THIS STORY! Anywayz, i don't really know wut you mean by scenes, but uh ok... uh i'll try? lol, well thanx i'll updatre asap!

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