51 Reviews Found

Review #1, by hp124 Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

1st December 2017:
Lol;) I love this! You did awesome with this story!

Author's Response: Thank you so much!! I'm so glad you liked it! I have no idea how you found this old story but I'm so glad you did :) Thanks for your review!

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Review #2, by alicia and anne Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

22nd May 2016:
Okay I couldn't stop laughing at those first two sentences.

OMG haha he doesn't want that guy to be head boy because his eyebrows connect hahaha

And the way that he stopped the fight between james Sirius and the girls was hilarious! Thinking he can stop it by smiling and winking.

This is hilarious! I honestly couldn't stop laughing and you've captured Gilderoy beautifully! You've written him perfectly I can't imagine anything more perfect!

I love this! He's just so ridiculous! :D

Author's Response: This review was the best surprise! Thank you!!

Haha, I never would have predicted how popular those first two lines would be. Thank you, I'm really glad you liked them!

You KNOW that's what Gilderoy would consider as qualifications to be head boy :P

Bringing peace to the whole world by smiling and winking! He never changed as he grew up, either :P

Aah, thank you so much! I'm so glad you enjoyed this and that you laughed a lot! It was super fun to write and I'm just thrilled you had as much fun reading it :) Thank you so much!

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Review #3, by The Basilisk Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

30th December 2015:
What a delightfully hilarious story!

You've got Gilderoy's characterization and persssonality down to an art! So full of himssself and sure of his greatnes, it's almost painful to read!

I was honessstly expecting the hair potion to do something horrid to Bertha's hair, but I suppose that's the ONE thing Lockhart'sss good at making!

I think it was really interesssting seeing a young Gilderoy here, and how he might have wound up being as awful as he was. Quite an entertaining read!

I may have to ssslither back to your author's page sssoon!

Author's Response: Thanksss! I'm so glad you enjoyed this story and the characterization of teenage Lockhart! Haha, I'm going to take it as a compliment that it was almost painful to read, because I definitely feel like that reading about Gilderoy as an adult. :P

I think Lockhart probably had the ability to be good at things if he really wanted to. We know he was proficient at memory spells, after all his obliviating people and writing their stories as his own, so I thought it could kind of work!

So glad you liked the read, and thanks so much for your review! ♥

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Review #4, by victoria_anne Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

12th December 2015:
Let me just wipe the tears of laughter from my eyes...

I had Lockhart's snobby voice in my head the whole time, which made it even funnier! I think you captured his airy character perfectly; well done!

Author's Response: Aw haha, thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed his characterisation and that the story made you laugh :D Thanks for reading and reviewing!

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Review #5, by proud-pied April Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

5th April 2015:
So marvellous is Lockhartís gorgeous hair.
Contrasting with his tasteful lilac hat.
It shines and ripples, silken, golden, fair;
Sad Potterís locks cannot compete with that!
A glorious and incandescent smile
From Gilderoy will light the world a while

So proud-pied April, much amused, leaves here
By way of compliment, some Easter cheer

Author's Response: So marvellous is this poetic review
it was such a pleasant surprise!
Thank you thank you thank you,
whoever you are in disguise.
Gilderoy is glad you appreciate him
and his beautiful, golden hair and pearly grin.

Thanks once again, and I just want to say,
Your review surely made my day!

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Review #6, by casual_chaos Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

27th January 2015:

I've seen this recommended in the C.R. and I'm always up for a good laugh so here I am!

I love Lockhart! His character was so great in the books and now this teenage Lockhart is just as hilarious as the older one, if not even more so!

I don't know how to explain my love for this one-shot in a constructive way! He's just so stupid that you have to love him! :D And I love reading extremely unreliable narrators - especially when they things get really overboard, like they did here. :)

''I really don't understand why; he is intelligent of course, but his eyebrows connect in the middle.'' Hahaha. This is just precious.

''That's why I'm a Ravenclaw; it's the house for the brilliant people. I am also brave, kind, considerate, and humble. I have beautiful hair.''
Seriously, I don't know what to say. :D

Okay, I loved the bit with James and his legs, it really fit in with what we know of him from canon (like what he did to Harry's arm). And OMG it is so natural of him to start a conversation with someone by saying 'Guess what my favourite color is.' It's not even a question, hahah.

And this is so perfect: ''After all, lavender and lilac are quite a few shades apart.''

This reminded me of a friend I have, who is very sensitive about different shades of colour (sometimes I say 'oh, I like your green shirt' when she's actually wearing a turquoise shirt and she looks at me in the most horrified way) so I think there may actually be people who can tell lavender from lilac. :P

When he went to give James a hair potion, I actually had this crazy idea that maybe this would end up as a really weird AU in which James would use the potion, get awesome hair which would make Lily fall in love with him, which would eventually result in them getting married and Harry being born. All because of Gilderoy. That way he would literally save the Wizarding world, haha. Quite naturally, I prefer your version of the story! :D

Okay, this is a useless review. Nevertheless, I will sum it up by saying how I loved your ridiculous, self-absorbed, deluded and extremely narcissistic portrayal of young Gilderoy and thank you for making me laugh!


Author's Response: Andy! Hello ♥
I've been quite surprised with the amount of attention this old one-shot has gotten, haha! At any rate, I'm so glad you decided to check it out! :)

I'm glad you enjoyed reading about teenage Lockhart! :P He is the most ridiculous and narcissistic and clueless character that his POV was just a blast to write :D. I'm glad you love unreliable narrators too! They're so much fun!

Once I worked out that Lockhart would have gone to Hogwarts roughly the same time as Harry's parents, there was really no other way than to include some sort of spell gone wrong as a nod to Harry's arm :D I'm glad you liked that! As well as the way he starts conversations hahah.

As Lockhart's favourite colour is specifically lilac, I figured he'd be particular about hues and that sort of thing (because honestly those colours look the same to me too :P)

Ahahahaha, I should have written that AU because it sounds hilarious. Or you should write it. It's like the happily-ever-after ending that would happen if this fic were a Disney movie. Well, in his mind, he did legit save the world - Saving the world is in the eye of the beholder! Just ask Voldemort. :P

This was a lovely review! I'm thrilled that you enjoyed this insight into young Gilderoy's thoughts and that it made you laugh, I have accomplished my goal then :)

Thank you so much!!

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Review #7, by HeyMrsPotter Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

29th December 2014:
KRISTIN! So I am SUPER behind on the review hot seat but am determined to catch up :p

I know this story has lots of reviews already BUT I've seen it mentioned a few times on the forums in the past and kept telling myself that I must read it and then kept forgetting, so here I am!

I absolutely ADORE Lockhart, I feel like I'm a part of a minority in the fandom but he's just so funny. You've written him absoluitely perfect. I'm so envious! Right from the opening line, this story just screamed Gilderoy Lockhart. I loved the line about him discovering how good he looked in lilac, his reasons for Wilhelm not being right for Head Boy, the fact that he thought of himself as humble...EVERYTHING. Your ability to write humour is nothing short of amazing. TEACH ME YOUR WAYS!

Though this was a humour piece, I couldn't help but feel all mushy about the appearence of James and Sirius. The fact that James ever had the Lockhart treatment like Harry did in CoS (because this story is definitely canon to me now) is just adorable.

You have this great balance of Lockhart's ability to manipulate people and charm them (and by people I mean teenage girls) and his complete ignorance at what most people actually think of him. The fact that he keeps mistaking people shaking their heads or gawping at him for their admiration is just so him.

I just bsolutely loved this. I'm going to favourite it so that every time I feel sad, I can read it! :D


Author's Response: Dee! Ahaha I'm so glad you came to read this story - and of course I don't mind you reviewing ones that have a lot of reviews, I left it open ended so people could pick anything they wanted to read :)

I discovered that Lockhart is actually my favourite character to write. He's so obnoxious but I just had so much fun writing this! :D Ahh, thank you so much - I'm so glad to hear that you liked my writing of him, especially considering you really like him as a character anyway! The humour is all Gilderoy Lockhart and no talent of my own - in fact I have no memory of ever writing this story, I think it was Lockhart himself who wrote it. He says so in Magical Me. (ok, but seriously though, thank you SO much, you're the best! *hugs Dee* )

Once I realised that Lockhart and James and Sirius would probably have been attending Hogwarts at the same time, there was really no way I could leave something like that out as it just felt like it needed to happen! I'm so glad you liked their cameo and waaah that you see this story as canon, I'm flattered! ♥

Thank you, I'm glad you liked that balance, as well as the complete unreliability of Lockhart's narration and how he sees everything through.. lilac-tinted lenses :p

Gah, I'm thrilled that you liked the story, and thank you so much for the favourite and for this amazing review! ♥

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Review #8, by Diogenissa Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

14th December 2014:
Heyllo--Happy Hufflepuff Hotseat Review Day!

WELL NOW, you nailed him--this was just...wow! Let's just say that I about choked on my snack and my monitor would have needed my soda pop more than I did I was laughing -that- hard! This was just too awesome for words--you have quite the talent for humor and it was thoroughly enjoyable. Thank you so much for an awesome story of the ROTFLOL variety!

Karen xoxo

P.S. -- I'd say that the cauldron didn't roll too far from the classroom from then until CoS did it? :-P

Author's Response: Hi Karen! Aw, thank you so much, I really appreciate it! Ahh, I hope no computer monitors or tracheas were harmed in the reading of this story. :P I'm so glad you enjoyed reading this and got some ROTFLOL's out of it haha.

'Cauldron didn't roll too far from the classroom' -- ahaha, brilliant. I love it :D

Thanks so much for your review!!

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Review #9, by EnigmaticEyes16 Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

30th August 2014:
Wow. This was like perfect Lockhart narration. He was just so engrossed with himself and his own reflection, just like in the books, and taking credit for things he didn't do, also just like in the books, that I don't think anyone could do any better. It was quite funny, too, how he thought he could save the world with hair potions. I'm not a big fan of Lockhart but I definitely loved this one-shot about him.

Great job on this!


Author's Response: Thank you! I'm so glad you liked the way I wrote Lockhart. Yeah, it seems he didn't change much! I don't know if anyone really is a fan of Lockhart besides himself, haha :p but I'm so glad you enjoyed this silly story! Thanks so much for reading and for your review!

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Review #10, by Felpata Lupin Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

28th August 2014:
Hahaha! This was so funny!!! I'm still giggling!!!
Absolutely Gilderoy! How did you manage that?
I loved every bit of it! Seeing the world through Gilderoy's eyes is just so... I don't really have an adjective for it... Surreal?
The scene with James and Sirius was great! When he gave him flippers, I just had a deja vu of another Potter missing some bones... Just great!
I loved all the other characters, too. Bertha, Gladys, Slughorn, McGonagall. They were all perfectly portrayed, and looking at them from Gilderoy's pov was just so amusing!
I'll never tire to repeat it, Kristin, you are really an amazing writer! Can't wait to read more of your stories!
Lots of love,

Author's Response: Hi again Chiara! Haha, this story was probably my favourite one to write. I'm glad you enjoyed reading it! And yes, I was definitely going for some deja vu there. Once I figured out that they probably would have gone to Hogwarts around the same time, there was no way to leave it out! And thanks, it's great that you enjoyed the other characters through Lockhart's POV. Thanks so much for reading!
♡ ♡

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Review #11, by The_Crookshanks_Saga Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

24th August 2014:
Merlin, marauderfan, well done! This fic was so adorable, it give me a whole new appreciation of perspective. Gilderoy is such a Narcissus, isn't he. You made him exactly how I always imagined him to be, and now I'm laughing so hard my pet nargle's getting a bit worried.

And the quote about being marvelous. You may have to copyright that, I love it so much :). Definite t-shirt material, right there.

One thing to criticize: the length. I felt like you wrapped it up completely-- but at the middle of the one-shot. Maybe a bit longer? Please?

Thanks for the review swap, and sorry this is so late!


Author's Response: Thanks Meena! Haha, I'm so glad you enjoyed the story and the portrayal of Gilderoy. Hope your pet nargle got over the worry. I hear that worried nargles can be quite dangerous. :P

Haha, when I wrote it, I had no idea that line about being marvellous would end up being so popular! Thanks!

Ah yes the length... The rest of the tale is told in Gilderoy's autobiography Magical Me, which is like 75,000 words about hair potions and shiny teeth, I hear it's worth buying. 6 Galleons, a steal! :p

Thanks so much for the swap! :D

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Review #12, by Ravenclaw333 Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

15th August 2014:

This story is fantastic. It's lighthearted, witty, and perfectly in character for Lockhart - you've brought him to life here and pull off his voice, his arrogance and his absolute self-assurance brilliantly. I like the recurring theme of the hair potions - it ties everything together really well, and is of course a perfect symbol of Gilderoy himself. The introduction of Gladys Gudgeon is an awesome use of the existing canon and really well done, and I enjoyed the cameos of James and Sirius and McGonagall as well.

Regarding the unreliable narration - you really couldn't have done a better job on that front. Lockhart's voice colours the entire story and it's impossible to separate the two. His revelations and 'understandings' of the world around him are all skewed by his inflated ego and self-importance, and you've tied the narration and characterisation together here perfectly. Thanks for entering this in the challenge!

Author's Response: Eeep thank you! It's wonderful to hear that you liked Lockhart's voice and thought he was portrayed well! I love little canon things like that and couldn't resist cameos from those characters through Lockhart's lens. I'm glad you liked the hair potion theme too!

The narration and ridiculous way Gilderoy sees the world was one of the most fun parts of writing this. I'm thriled that you enjoyed the self-important and clueless narration :D Thank you so much for the review, and what a great challenge idea! Thanks!

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Review #13, by MischiefNotQuiteMannaged Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

12th July 2014:
This is Brilliant! I was laughing the whole time I read this! Oh Gilderoy, you live in your own little lilac world (For some reason I can't see McGonagall joining you)! It makes total sense that he and Bertha would be best friends! He's such a character! Is this a normal day for him? I love his thoughts on the Head boy, and why he should be Head boy! I'm sure that if the Head boy was chosen based on looks alone Gilderoy would most definitely been named head boy!
I love how you captured his vanity! So caught up in staring at his own reflection in his cauldron that he misses Gladys slipping him a note!
Gilderoy's meeting with the Marauders is funny, I can really see James appreciating a Hair potion, especially "Lily of the Valley" :P
You've given me so much insight into Gilderoy! I feel I understand him so much better. I now understand that the world revolves entirely around him :P ! I know I'm not meant to judge people before I get to know them but I'm pleasantly surprised that his Hair potions actually work! :)
I loved this so incredibly much!

House Cup 2014 Review!
Hufflepuff for House Cup!

Author's Response: Thanks! :D I'm so glad to have made you laugh! Of course, all the credit goes to Gilderoy Lockhart, who modified my memory after I wrote this and now I'm convinced that he wrote the whole thing. :P

I'm thrilled that you liked his and Bertha's friendship, and that you thought they made good friends - I really enjoyed writing them together, as well as Gilderoy's complete obliviousness as to what is happening around him due to his preoccupation with his own face. I'm so glad you liked that, thanks!

I had way too much fun writing James' interaction with Lockhart; it just seemed too perfect not to do it, considering what Lockhart did to Harry a generation later. Hehehe.

Of course the world revolves around him. He IS a star, you see. XD And well, he did have at least a little competency with spells as he Obliviated nearly a dozen people and took credit for their work in his books, so I figured maybe he was good at making hair potions as well!

Thanks so much for your review!

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Review #14, by Beeezie Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

10th July 2014:
I love a good parody, especially a good parody involving Lockhart.

This was hilarious. Both your writing style and the subject material have me cracking up. You really captured Lockhart's voice perfectly - he was just so intensely self-satisfied that it felt like I was reading CoS all over again.

I also loved how you included some of the more minor characters who might have had some contact with Lockhart - I especially enjoyed Gladys, who I've always really wondered about. How on earth did she find Lockhart to be so fascinating that she spent so much of her life writing letters to him? This definitely provides some explanation, which I really enjoyed. And I loved seeing James's reaction to him - I can totally see him reacting with such disdain and irritation.

Hilarious, and a great story.

House Cup 2014 Review - Ravenclaw

Education Decree #7 (McGonagall tells Lupin he should be wearing black, not lilac)

Author's Response: Hello! Thank you so much, I am so glad this was entertaining and that it sounds like Lockhart! I had SO much fun writing this in Lockhart's voice :D And I'm quite flattered to hear that this was like reading CoS over again!

I loved adding in those minor canon characters - Gladys, the perpetual fan from the books, seemed like an ideal friend/admirer for him at Hogwarts :D I'm glad it seemed logical! And it's wonderful to hear that you enjoyed James' cameo as well.

Thank you so much for your review and I'm really glad you enjoyed the story!! :D

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Review #15, by jessicalorewrites Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

7th July 2014:
I adore this oneshot with all my heart. I don't really know what I expected when I first clicked on to read but it definitely wasn't such a flawless piece of writing. Your Gilderoy plays the perfect part of cocky yet he does it with such an innocent nature. In a way, I actually feel sorry for him because he genuinely does believe that he's the most handsome, most talented. Bless.

And the little nod to James and Sirius made me squeal ;) OH MY GOSH, GIVING JAMES THE HAIR POTION. I'm sorry but I can just imagine little 14/15 year old James Potter being a stuck up little prat about the whole thing. It made me giggle so much.

Honestly, this is one of the most loud-out-loud funny things I've read in a while. Which maybe isn't a good thing because I was up at midnight reading this ;) hehe

Overall I positively ADORE this fic. Well done on such great characterisation!! :)


{House Cup 2014 Review - Gryffindor}

Author's Response: I adore YOU with all my heart! Thank you for this amazing review ♥ The fact that you called this 'flawless' just has me spinning around in joy. And I'm sure Lockhart would be thrilled to think that you described him as flawless :P

I'm glad you enjoyed the scene with James and Sirius too! Haha, when I reasoned that they probably would have been at Hogwarts during the same years I just HAD to include them.

I'm positively thrilled that you laughed out loud while reading this and enjoyed Lockhart's characterisation! Thank you for reading and for your wonderful review!!!

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Review #16, by awesomepotter Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

8th June 2014:
Hey there! I'm here for our review swap on the forums, and I apologise for how long it's taken for me to get around to doing this!
I love your characterization of Lockhart - he's cocky and full of himself, but it's in a rather innocent way. As a character, I get the impression that he doesn't mean to be annoying or a complete git, he just firmly believes he's the bee's knees and doesn't underdstand why not everyone seems to agree. I always think he's a bit of a 'Tim Nice-but-Dim', and you conveyed that really well to me.
I love how you managed to include James and Sirius into this; I think you characterized them really well too. So basically, big clap for characterization ;)
I do like this because, while actually not much happens plot-wise, in the case of this story I find that that's a GOOD thing. It fits with the personality of the main character. For Gilderoy, nothing really troubles him. He just keeps pottering along in his marvellous little world, and nothing really affects him. So to have a one-shot where by the end, Lockhart has basically done... well, not a lot, does fit in with the story, and I think it really does help with the characterisation all the more. Did that sound like a backhanded compliment? I didn't mean to make it sound like one, although when I read it back aminute ago it sort of seemed like one (to me, but what do I know?). I didn't mean to! Anyway, on with the review...
You've just created an excellent piece of work here. I can't think of anything else to say apart from how wonderful it is. Your characterisation is just fabulous, creating a boy whi we really, REALLY want to hate - but we can't becuase he hasn't actually done anything wrong. I really loved this story and I can only apologise for not writing more.
Well done!
awesomepotter xxx

Author's Response: Hi! Thank you, I'm so glad you like the portrayal of Lockhart. I think you've hit the nail on the head about Lockhart being innocent about his arrogance, he's just really deluded haha. I'm so glad you enjoyed the characterisation of both him and James and Sirius.

That is very true, there essentially is no plot to this fic haha! I'm glad to hear that it fit with his personality! And no it doesn't seem like a backhanded compliment, I get what you mean. :)

I suppose apart from turning James into half a mermaid, lying about it, and cheating at Potions, he really hasn't done anything wrong. But yeah exactly, he doesn't see those things as being wrong, so you're right! :p Your review was so so lovely, thank you so much for reading and I'm thrilled you enjoyed the story! ♡

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Review #17, by writeyourheartout Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

25th April 2014:
Kristin. I can't. I can't even deal with this. IT'S TOO FUNNY. (Which reminds me: CONGRATULATIONS ON WINNING THE KECKER FOR BEST QUOTE! So well-deserved! Between this story and Death Eater's Kitchen, there are so many quotable moments - many of which I'm sure to share below in a minute - that it's no surprise at all you took it! Gilderoy is not the only one who's marvelous! ;))

This particular brand of humor is just so right up my alley. I can't decide if it's a parody or not, because in most cases it would be, except for Gilderoy Lockhart is sort of a one-man parody himself, so perhaps it's just him that's so parody-like, while the writing is really just an honest portrayal of a parodical character? *head explodes*

Does any of that even matter, though? No. Because whatever the case may be, THIS STORY IS BRILLIANT.

Warning: I will try to use restraint, but it's possible that what follows will be nothing more than an onslaught of me quoting you.

OMG THIS: "Wilhelm Wigworthy is Head Boy. I really don't understand why; he is intelligent of course, but his eyebrows connect in the middle." - hahaha It's so very much who Gilderoy Lockhart is at the core of his being, to judge a persons worth by the space between their eyebrows. And what follows, with the acne cream suggestions... Omg, I can't. What I love about this is that it's so, so funny, and it's also so, so terribly true of his character! hahaha He's such a back-handed piece of work! Like, he's the type of person who can only dole out a compliment or a bit of advice if it's tacked onto something negative about that same person! "I would love to help you with your issue, because your issue is gross and I'm a nice person." hahaha What a tool... Makes for a great read, though. ;)

Love the scene with James and Sirius! Of course, Lockhart gets the spell wrong, and poor James gets turned into a half-fish! hehehe I think you were really clever, too, about how you worked in little canon details about the two of them, so that they didn't feel interchangeable with any other other pair of guys sparring in the corridor. And ZOMG, I just lerv the excuses Lockhart makes for himself as to why things don't go quite as planned, or as to why the younger kids don't respect him and call him a git, and why he's not Head Boy, etc. He's so... so... just... stupid, really! How'd someone so delusional get sorted into Ravenclaw?? LOL What's funny is that's there's something sadly charming about his naivety - almost like a lost little puppy with its head stuck in a box - you just sort of want to pet them for being so adorably dumb... hehehe

Between the winking and the smiling that goes on throughout this entire story, I just... I can't, I can't. He's so... Kristen, how did you handle writing this? hahaha He's so... ugh! There aren't words. Let's move past it. :-p


"My dearest ambition is to sell these potions someday, and while I'm promoting my hair potions I'll create peace and cooperation between all magical folk just through mutual appreciation of my hair-care potions." - Ahahaha! And it all comes together. He will save the world... through pretty hair. Brilliant.

"It must be dreadful to not have people be jealous of you all the time. I wouldn't know." - Bahaha *wipes tears* I'm doing terribly at this whole over-quoting thing, aren't I? BUT IT'S JUST SO QUOTABLE! Your sense of humor and your comedic timing and the way each joke lands so perfectly has me laughing throughout this entire story. I don't think a lot of people could write this brand of humor well, so it really speaks a lot to your level of talent in all things quirky and bizarre that you were able to craft such a fabulous fic with such an outrageous character! What goes on in that mind of yours, I ask? :-p

The way it ends... Omg. hahaha I just adore the way you're able to touch on so many aspects of his character, including his habit of stretching the truth or flat out lying to make himself seem better than he actually is! And the reference to 'Holidays with Hags' is a perfect conclusion. I love when those tiny details from canon pop up in a fanfic! ^.^

Kristen, I... just... he's just such... he's such a buffoon! LOL But YOU! You are absolutely wonderful. You wrote him phenomenally. Like, I can't even wrap my head around how fantastic this is. I can't imagine a better, funnier, or more accurate representation of Gilderoy Lockhart anywhere else. He's so spot on that it almost makes me sad that a character so out of touch with reality exists. But mostly it just makes me laugh non-stop. :-p

Brilliance, my friend. That is all.


Author's Response: Tanya! I can't even with this review. IT'S TOO NICE! I seriously don't know how to respond to it without simply fangirling about your review and about how amazing you are.

Bahhh thank you so much! I was so surprised - and congrats to you too on your Keckers awards, so well deserved!!

You know, I've never really thought of this one as a parody - I think it's more that Lockhart IS a parody. I have no idea either :P Oh no, your head can't explode, you need your head so you can write chapter 5 of Lying Josephine which I love! ;)

I love your comparison of Lockhart to a lost puppy, I find it a very apt description in fact. Honestly, I put him in Ravenclaw because he didn't fit into the other houses :p and he had to be at least mildly intelligent to invent hair potions, and use all those obliviating spells on people years later.

Gah, thank you so much! I'm so glad you like my (bizarre) sense of humour and that you think Lockhart is in character! What does go on in my mind? Well, in real life I'm extremely narcissistic and spend all day lying about myself to sound cooler, so it wasn't too much of a stretch to write this. :P Joking, but really I have no idea. I was just having fun writing something silly, and then it turned out that people liked it!

Thank you sooo sosososo much for this review, I am seriously so flattered reading your compliments!! Especially since I admire your writing a lot and then to get this review from you I kind of became a Victorian lady and had to fan myself and sit down because I was hyperventilating. :P But you really did make my day with this review! Thank you!!! ♥ ♥ ♥

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Review #18, by HEG Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

23rd March 2014:
HI I'm here for our review swap.

I really like this, it's very funny. I like the way how Lockhart is so boastful - I especially love the bit at the start when he says this is how I became marvellous then he says 'wait I was always marvellous' that made me laugh.

Keep up the good work,

HEG :)

Author's Response: Hi! Thanks, I'm so glad you enjoyed this! Haha, you know Lockhart could be no less boastful as a teenager than he was as an adult :p Thanks for the swap! :)

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Review #19, by Arianna Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

15th February 2014:
I haven't found many good stories on here, but this was truly funny and awesome!

Author's Response: Aw thank you, I'm so glad you enjoyed it!

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Review #20, by Panda Weasley  Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

10th February 2014:
Ome gosh! I love this story so much! It's awesome!

Author's Response: Thank you so much!! I am so happy you enjoyed it :D thanks for your review!

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Review #21, by Pixileanin Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

2nd February 2014:
"And it's when I first discovered how good I looked in lilac. I've always thought that those two discoveries were related."

Bwahahaha! Oh, Gilderoy Goldenlocks! You are too funny! He sounds JUST LIKE the Lockhart in the books. How on earth did you do that???

"I could write an entire book about why I'd be a much better Head Boy..." Oh? He didn't write that one?? Maybe it was an early draft that he changed into something else later on... I love that nod to his future profession. Storyteller extraordinaire. I could seriously quote almost the whole story for funny lines. I should stop now, or this review won't be coherent at all. Hahha! So funny!

Oh gosh, the way he deals with the fourth years is so hilarious, and the signature wink as well. Poor Potter's feet... not really. Okay okay. One more quote:

"My smile alone should be able to stop wars..."

How did you manage to squeeze so many funny details into one fic? Every paragraph is like gold. He is so completely full of himself, it's unreal. And accurate. I feel like he's in my face the whole time, winking, tossing his hair, showing off his pearly whites...

Oh, and how the rumor has grown! You've thought of everything here, I can't contain myself! I love that turn at the end, signifying his grand entrance into exaggerating his stories. This was such a pleasure to read! (even though I almost died of laughter - is there a warning for that?)

So so funny!!!

Author's Response: Hehehe, I wish I could favourite this review so I can come back to read it all the time. :D

Thank you! I'm so glad it sounds just like dear old Gilderoy in the books. Hm, how did I do that? Magic? Legilimency? :p

Apparently he didn't write a book about that... maybe he only wrote a short leaflet about it, full of pictures of course, which he then distributed copies among the Hogwarts students.

I can't imagine it would be pleasant to have Lockhart all in your face winking and showing off his pearly whites like that - though I would imagine that at least he probably has excellent dental hygiene. :p Anyway, I'm glad you enjoyed reading from Lockhart's ridiculous POV haha.

I am so glad you liked this story and found it so funny! Thank you for this absolutely wonderful review, it really brightened my day! ♥

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Review #22, by teh tarik Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

2nd February 2014:
right right right

oh my lord Kristin

Your humour is srsly aslkdjlnv

I feel like Lockhart himself has just leapt in front of me, swept me into a chair before proceeding to recite to me a long, dramatic saga of his magnificent deeds. And of course, he uses the most flamboyant of hand gestures, punctuated now and then with a toss of those sun-kissed luxurious locks of his.

I swear you've got every nuance of Lockart perfect, from the starting lines: This is the story of how I became marvellous. That's a joke. I was always marvellous. Oh my ghruajjvnjd just like your Barty Crouch story, which nearly killed me with the opening line, these starting sentences were absolutely wonderfully perfect and Lockhart-ish. You've captured his voice so wonderfully!

Wilhelm Wigworthy, Head Boy with the monobrow, lol. OF COURSE that would be the thing Lockhart notices. And I must say I love how Lockhart is so disinterested by gossip of any kind, because they're all to do with other people rather than himself.

And I was beside myself with glee when he transformed Potter's feet into flippers!! Let's face it, I have no great love for James Potter. :P And and and Lockhart tampering about with Potter's feet is a nice nod to canon, and I can't help giggling at the thought that in the future, he'll do something very very similar to James' own son.

And of course, the hair care potions and his obsessive hair care regimes. ♥ Well, at least we know that Lockhart wasn't totally useless at schoolwork...he was a Ravenclaw after all. That being said, I must admit he comes off as incredibly lucky rather than truly intelligent bahaha! Especially with the whole money-making scheme.

Anyway,this was a hilarious read, my dear! I'd love to see more oneshots on Lockhart written by you ahahah! (Gilderoy would be very very pleased if you wrote more about him). ♥

Thanks for asking me to read this; this was awesome!


Author's Response: Aw, thank you! (I think. I looked up 'aslkdjlbv' in the dictionary and to my utter shock there was no definition listed so I'll just interpret that word to mean 'THE BEST EVER OMG!' Or I suppose it could mean that it's terrible but you're too polite to say so. :p Anyway.. I'm meant to be responding to this review, but I am like a dog surrounded by squirrels - absurdly easily distracted.

where was I? oh yes THANK YOU! I am so glad to hear that this sounds just like Lockhart's voice and that you can see him doing wild hand motions and hair-flipping as he tells the story haha, that's perfect. It means a lot to me that you thought the characterisation was spot on! It's wonderful to know I can convincingly write an obnoxious and clueless person like him. :p

Hehe, I'm glad you enjoyed that scene wih James too! I liked the kind of situational irony as it's very similar to what happens a generation later.

Yes, I think if anything turned out the way Lockhart wanted it to, he saw it as a testament to his own intelligence rather than the far more likely possibility that he was just lucky haha.

Thanks for this wonderful review! Sorry my response probably makes no sense... I shouldn't respond to these things late at night :p I am so glad you enjoyed the story! ♥ ♥ Thank you!

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Review #23, by maraudertimes Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

14th January 2014:
I'm sorry I took so long, but I honestly stared at this line for five minutes, laughing my head off: "This is the story of how I became marvellous. That's a joke. I was always marvellous."

There is nothing in that entire thing that isn't completely 100% Gilderoy Lockhart.

This was an amazing one-shot. I loved reading through Lockhart's POV, especially considering he does such silly things! I cannot express how amazing you made him, so I'm going to take this opportunity and write down only some of the best quotes. Some because if I did all it would be about half the story...

"I'll create peace and cooperation between all magical folk just through mutual appreciation of my hair-care potions."

"I must have been distracted by the sensational face smiling back at me from the side of my cauldron."

"I haven't *actually* saved any first-years from an Acromantula, but I know there are some Acromantulas living in the Forbidden Forest and I know some first-years have gone into the forest, so it sounds quite believable."

That last one really connected me to Lockhart. It's like when I'm trying to reason to my teacher about why I didn't do the homework...

Basically, you wrote Lockhart *AMAZINGLY* well. So well in fact, that he might just come to life and take credit for all your fics!


or am I? Mwahahahahaha!

I'm sorry...

And then at the end, when he says that maybe people might believe he met hags on holiday I was like 'Oh snap! Canon reference!' This was just unbelievable! Also, the title fits magnificently!

Anyways, this is one of the best humor things I've seen. I don't know if it's because of the coffee or because it's late, or because you're just that funny, but I was stopping to laugh almost every two paragraphs!

Amazing job! Simply marvelous!
Lo :D

Author's Response: Hi there! Haha, this review just made my day. Actually I'm quite glad you ended up reading this one from all the way near the end my AP, as it's one of my favourites that I've written, such a ridiculous fic.

I'm so happy to hear you thought it seemed like an accurate portrayal of Lockhart! I can't imagine him *not* doing silly things, and he's pretty oblivious to people's reactions so that just lends itself to absurd situations.

Heheh. Well, if I log in one day and find out my username has been changed to "GilderoyLockhartfan" I'll know why. :p

I'm so glad you liked this story - it certainly was a lot of fun to write :D Your review was hilarious, too. Thanks so much!

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Review #24, by patronus_charm Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

24th December 2013:
Merry Christmas Kristin even if its not quite that in the US yet! Just to note this was written at about two am on my iPod so sorry for any craziness!

I adored this one shot it was simpy brilliant and my favourite parody one of you so far! You have Lockhart's air down perfectly it really had me cracking up. I think the best part was how he was like I'm so humble when he was bogging up his ego inte next sentence.

I never imagined him at Hogwarts so finding out James and Sirius were his juniors was a nice twist and I loved their cameo role. Lockhart was just like Percy in a way his shouting them down. I loved the inclusion of other canon characters such as Gladys and Betha as it really added another level to the one shot and had me laughing.

I really hope that Lockhart did manage to live out his dream later on his life because it sounded as if it really suited him, more so than the pretending to be a dark arts genius!

Great one shot Kristin and merry Christmas!!!


Author's Response: Kiana!!! What a wonderful surprise review ♥

Thanks so much, I'm glad you liked it and thought it captured Lockhart's air. I must admit I loved writing Lockhart's POV as he's just so ridiculous! :D

It is rather weird to think of him at Hogwarts - I imagine he'd be able to get away with a lot less as a student, haha. And yes after all the things Lockhart unintentionally did to Harry in CoS (like the arm thing), I figured it would be amusing if he'd been the same way with Harry's father! Haha, now that you mention it, yeah Lockhart does seem a bit like Percy here! Only Percy is a little less oblivious :p

I know right? What was he ever doing trying to teach defence against the dark arts? He should have stayed with hair potions. They always say stick with your instincts. Perhaps if/when he left St. Mungos he got to sell hair potions again, and then that's how the wizarding world recovered from Voldemort haha.

Thanks for such a wonderful review!! My response is a little belated in wishing you a merry Christmas, so happy birthday! ;)

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Review #25, by SkyEcho Hair-Care Potion Maker Extraordinaire

17th November 2013:
I'm so impressed with how you write humour! I actually laughed out loud while reading this - and I can't remember the last time that's happened. I think you did a perfect job with your portrayal of Lockhart. I especially liked "I fought hags when I was on holiday over the summer, and I won." I also really enjoyed seeing how oblivious he is to the reactions of others...and reality. James' reaction to Lockhart's hair potion gift was well done.

You have a wonderful writing style and I really enjoyed reading this :)

Author's Response: Hi there! I'm glad you enjoyed the story enough to laugh out loud at it! And thank you, it's great to hear that you liked the portrayal of Lockhart. He was always so oblivious to the things he did in the books, so I figured he could tell a whole story and have no idea what was happening outside of his own head, haha!

Thank you so much for your compliments on my writing style, and for your lovely review! ♥♥

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