Reading Reviews for The Brave at Heart
  
148 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Ashley A New Start

7th April 2014:
Oh dear Lord you just made my day. 'use the force Luke' honestly I shouldn't be laughing this hard

Author's Response: Your review just made my day! :D Haha I'm glad you enjoyed that part. Thanks so much for your review!!

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Review #2, by Louise Tricks and Treats, But Mostly Tricks

6th April 2014:
This story is fantastic so far! It makes me want to read on with all the exiting things that are happening and it is very well written. Hoping for a little bit more Action/Romance/Adventure in the next chapters but overall I love the characters and the story so far!

Author's Response: Wow, thank you!! I am so thrilled that you like it! All three of those elements do appear in the story, though it takes a bit of time to get going ;) Thanks so much for your review!

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Review #3, by oldnumberseven  The End of the Beginning

24th March 2014:
Omg, that's it?? I mean, of course the story ends here because they took their NEWTs and had the End of the Year Feast, but omg it's over??

Wow, what a story. As I've said over and over again, you have such a fresh perspective and thrilling OC, so bravo to you. 37 chapters is quite the commitment, but I'm so happy you had the time to write all of them out till the end - that's not an easy thing to do!

I'm more than excited for the epilogue, because this chapter has laid the groundwork for some interesting scenarios, but are you going to have a sequel or sorts? Or will the epilogue fill in the gaps?

Thank you so much for your story, it was a pleasure to read :D

Author's Response: Yeah... it seemed like an appropriate place to end it. I debated for a while about continuing a bit further, but it wouldn't really have been the same story, I think. I won't say any more here though, it will all be told in the epilogue... sort of.

That is seriously the most wonderful thing to hear, that the perspective and characters are entertaining and original, just, gahh ♥♥ THANK YOU ♥

I know, I don't think I had realised before posting this on HPFF just how long it was, the word count really surprised me! haha. And yes, it was quite a commitment - 6 years of writing :O Thanks for your commitment too in reading all of it! *hugs*

Mmm, as yet I have no plans for a sequel (although some of the characters will appear in another fic, just in minor roles). But who knows. Someday maybe, if I'm inspired...

Thank YOU so much for reading and for your wonderful reviews! :D


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Review #4, by Rumpelstiltskin What Friends Are For

21st March 2014:
Back!

Yay, presents! Oh my...Sirius and his dirty mind ;). His suggestiveness could never get old, it always makes me laugh!

Oh boy, a detention with Sirius :D, this can only go horribly wrong. Yup, Sirius is slightly annoying, then turns all broody when Regulus and his home-life is mentioned -_-. Well, I can't say I blame him, but it isn't Mel's fault...she has no idea! (She begged a little.) Aw, that was sweet, Sirius hugs :D.

Only Sirius detentions have water fights. Whoo, more detention! *Cough*

Oh thank goodness, she broke up with Luke! :D (er, probably not something I should be happy about but I am and you can't stop me!!)

Ahaha, that's a wonderful response to somebody stealing the Marauder's Map :D. I love it!

There, a bonus chapter because it took me FOREVER to come and say hi!

-Rumpel

Author's Response: Ooh, two reviews? How did I get so lucky? :D Also I just realized that in my response to your last review, I used about 30 of these :p faces.

Haha, I couldn't resist. I am secretly just really immature. :p (Ok, not so secretly. And there I go with that smiley again, I need an intervention.)

I think it wouldn't be too bad, as detentions go! Water fights are the best.

I don't blame you for being happy about that! I mean, Luke isn't all that interesting to read about. I think his spirit animal is probably a flobberworm. And besides, Mel was with him for the wrong reasons.

Glad you liked theMarauder's Map, haha. Thank you for your reviews today! :D


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Review #5, by Rumpelstiltskin New Faces and New Places

21st March 2014:
I'm very late on getting to this...and very sorry too :(!

I'm glad that she's trying to stay in touch with her Nathan; it must be difficult to believe that he may have something to do with Death Eaters, especially when he's your own brother :(.

Aha, pranks ahoy! Poor Mel; at least it was funny (for me).

It sounds like Vanessa is jealous -- but she can totally have Luke, just saying ;). Mel can get an upgrade. And that chick totally means to be rude...it's intentional. I don't like her (as a person, as a character she's fantastic, because I hate her, if that makes sense...).

And then she's being suspiciously nice. Suspicious I tell you! (You will never receive and non-rambling, completely coherent review from me and I'm sorry about that.)

Haha, the Marauders totally deserved it.

Nathan's response letter was sweet :D. Ready for my epic prediction? Okay, so Nathan's going to be a DE, Mel's joining the Order, and she's going to have to fight her brother :(! Okay, so it was more of a tragic prediction than an epic one but..

Anyway. I kind of love that there is a short explanation of why not to lean over the toaster while it's on :D. I tend to forget that witches and wizards aren't always accustomed to Muggle devices (at least when Arthur Weasley isn't in the picture).

...and then she runs off to Luke. *Sigh*

;) Great chapter, I'm sorry it took me so long...I get distracted very easily...

-Rumpel

Author's Response: Rumpel!! Hey no worries, nothing to apologise for, its not like you're paid to read fanfiction haha. I'm just glad you're still reading! :D

Yeah, Melanie and Nathan are pretty close so it's definitely worrying for her.

teehee, I'm glad. I thought the pranks were funny too, even if Mel didn't. I love April Fool's! :p

oh, Vanessa... I'm glad you love to hate her. I think that's the only thing she's good for. :p

I love rambly reviews! Plus I'm responding late at night so I'm probably not making a whole lot of sense anyway, sorry.

Ooh, predictions! Are you willing to put 20 Galleons on that? :p Heh. Only time will tell...

True fact: The leaning over the toaster thing was inspired by my own brilliant mistakes in real life - I burnt a scarf by leaning over a toaster. Dur. I don't even have the excuse of being magical. :p

Haha I don't think anyone really likes Luke, poor guy. But yeah... Melanie needs to open her eyes!

Thank you so much for reading and for this lovely review!!


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Review #6, by LightLeviosa5443 Tricks and Treats, But Mostly Tricks

11th March 2014:
Hi! I'm finally here with your requested review. This one took me even longer than last time and for that I am so so so so so terribly sorry! Now, onto the review!

I thought that the way you characterized Filch, Remus, Melanie, and Peeves was to perfection in this chapter. Filch was fantastically grumpy, and I could totally see him stomping around the castle trying to give people detention because a prank was pulled. Remus, when he was goading Melanie into a prank war, and when he was honest about what he was doing in Three Broomsticks, and really just that whole interaction. it was so sincere and so Remus that I loved it. I could completely see a young Lupin doing that. Melanie, I loved the way that she told him that they did all of the pranks, I loved that she baited him, even after he baited her. The banter the two had made me feel like it some something old friends would do, which was a nice touch and a great way to establish that friendship. And then Peeves. Peeves was just so spot on, with the teasing, and making more trouble and noise. I loved it!

This chapter flowed really well. I liked how easily you transitioned from leaving the castle, to them going to hogsmeade. The way that you really covered everything that happened in hogsmeade but not in so much detail that I was skipping over to move on. Then you enetered the castle, planted an awkward moment for Melanie, planned the prank, pulled the prank and had the post prank. It wasn't rushed at all, which is great, because I think this was a chapter that, if written differently, could feel very rushed. So, it was all really just perfect. Bravo!

One little thing, I was initially confused about the whole filch thing in the beginning of the story, but it made sense once I read on. So my only constructive criticism would be to take a peek at that first scene and maybe mention why they're all there getting their names called!

That aside, I wrote down some of my favorite scenes because I wanted to mention them to you. These are in no particular order:
-When peeves was sweeping in to make a ruckus while the girls were still working on the painting. I can only imagine how much of a nuisance that would be while you're trying to pull off a big prank that could get in you in a very big amount of trouble. The scene was so funny and well done.

- When the marauders got stuck to the wall, well really just the entire wall scene. Especially since Flitwick was stuck up there too. Nice touch, by the way.

-The Remus/Melanie Hogsmeade scene. Um. Yes. Should I start shipping them? I mean, I know the story says Sirius/oc which is why I'm curious (because Melanie is the MC). But I really did love that, even if they stay just friends or turn into more.

-When they did the actual painting of the dragon. I was literally having a mini heart-attack the whole time because I was so worried that someone was going to catch them and they'd be in loads of trouble and the marauders would win. I'm so glad the girls didn't get caught!

-The scene where everyone is seeing the prank and reacting to it. I loved the way you explained it and the imagery you gave us. It was a really great way to finish off the chapter, I think, and I really enjoyed how you described it all!

This was a really wonderful chapter, and I really am so sorry that it took me so long to get to it! I hope you re-request.

xoxo Sarah

P.S. I could never get sick of you ;)

Author's Response: Hi Sarah! Haha, really don't worry about the time, I'm in no rush and I haven't been around much myself either, so I don't blame you. Yay! *throws around a handful of rainbows*

Ahh yay! I'm glad Remus is written well and that it seems in character for him to act like that. It's wonderful to hear you liked their interaction in that scene! That was one of my favourite scenes to write in this chapter. Haha, yeah, you can ship whoever you want, I'm not standing in your way. All I'm going to say here is Maybe. Who wants to spoil the fun of guessing? :p Anyway haha. I am so happy to hear that Peeves was spot on as well, and Filch too! Thank you!

Ah great I'm glad it flowed well. Hm that part about Filch... at the end of the previous chapter I had mentioned the Hogsmeade weekend, but that's a good point maybe I should add a line in as a refresher at the beginning of this one, just in case anyone else took a long break between chapters 2 and 3!

Thank you for such a thoughtful review! I appreciate it a lot. ♥


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Review #7, by 800 words of heaven Curses and Cheers

8th March 2014:
REVIEW TAG!

It has been so long since I read this story - which always seems to be the case :( I always forget how much I missed it until I start reading it again - which is also always the case :P

And so the prank war begins! I cannot wait to see what the Marauders have up their sleeve! I found it really amusing how she refers to Remus separately from James and Sirius. And Remus had a chance to shine again by showing that he's well aware why his friends go around acting like idiots all the time.

I get the impression that no one likes Snape. I find that a little strange since Slytherins are known for looking after their own, but I guess Snape gives off vibes which mark him as belongin to no-mans-land. Will he be making an appearance throughout the story? I'm excited to see in which direction you take him.

It's wonderful how you've set up Regulus as a follower already. It's a nice way to link him to canon, where he follows what his family expects of him, and thus ends up becoming a Death Eater - and then hating it. Perhaps he'll get to show the other side of him, with all those hidden depths and deep-rooted courage by standing up to Elliot Jasper in some way later on!

It's also interesting how you've shown people of other Houses rally around her despite her being a Slytherin. I guess all bets are off when Slytherins pick on other Slytherins - you know something is definitely wrong with that picture!

The plot thickens! I hope to be back soon(er) :)

Author's Response: Haha, well I haven't been around much lately and I think this must be my first time playing review tag in like a month and a half, so no worries! But I'm glad you like the story enough to miss it, haha.

At this point she has talked to Remus a little, but James and Sirius have had no reason to bother talking with her much - so they're like a whole separate problem, haha.

Well, I don't know if it's that no one likes Snape... I wouldn't see him as really popular, but some people like him. Melanie used to be his friend - this of course is getting to the tail end of their friendship as they've stopped trusting each other now, so really it's probably her slightly biased narration that gives that impression of no one liking him!

I'm glad you liked Regulus in here, and thought it adhered to canon! You know,I kind of wish I'd included him more often than I did in this fic. I like that idea of him standing up to Jasper!

Well, she's not exactly popular, so having support from other houses was a big deal to her. Yeah, I think when there's a Slytherin versus another Slytherin, people would rally around the one that doesn't pick on them!

Thank you so much for your review!


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Review #8, by oldnumberseven  Stepping on a Serpent

8th March 2014:
Hello again :D

I want to start off by saying that you have a great attention to detail. All of the pranks mentioned in this fic are so original and funny, as are scenes like the Muggle April Fools joke and riding bikes with Balancing Charms. I love stories that have little connections to the Wizarding World/the 1970s, so bravo for making your story so realistic!

On that note, I love that all the characters are starting to think about their lives after school and what the war will do to them. It's interesting to see that Charlotte's death was a wake up call, not just for Melanie and Mandy, but for the other Slytherins as well. In all of JK's books, we see the Gryffindor perspective, but I haven't read a lot of fics that show the Slytherin side of things, especially during the First War. As I mentioned before, that's the number one thing I love about this fic - I'm a Hufflepuff myself but I love getting to know other houses by reading phenomenal fics like yours :D

Btw, I was fangirling so hard when Melanie were fighting/snogging. Gah, I love them.

Excellent chapter!

Author's Response: Eee! So great to see another review from you! Thanks, I'm glad you like the amount of detail. Sometimes I wondered if I added too much so the plot didn't move forward, haha - I love adding details like that to set the scene and the time period so it feels real, ya know? So yay thank you, I'm glad it feels realistic and original :)

I wrote this section of the story when I was beginning to wonder what on earth I was doing with ny own life, so it showed up here :p But yeah, I think for these students who are leaving school and heading into a world at war, things get a lot more intense and they have to think seriously about the future.

Thanks, I'm really happy that you like the Slytherin perspective and getting to know the house - though I'm a Hufflepuff too! :p

Hehe, I enjoyed writing that scene :D

Thanks so much for another fab review!


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Review #9, by toomanycurls Stepping on a Serpent

8th March 2014:
I'M GOING TO DIE FROM HAPPINESS!!! YOU MENTIONED ME!! Whoo. Had to get the shouts out early.

Oh dear, April Fools with a pureblood in a muggleborn house... you did a hilarious job with that. :D Not the dishes! What if they were centuries old china from someone important!?!?!

Balancing charms - I need one for my bike.

I'm happy they got Charlotte healing time. Their trip to the cemetary was a great scene.

When you said it wasn't as good as the previous Easter, I thought it might have been a dramatic holiday and I was glad to be wrong.

Yay!!! I hope Mel gets to have a lot of unspeakable fun!!!

Um, if Mandy becomes a rockstar clothes designer, that'd be rad. :D

ahaha, I love Mandy's recruitment technique for their duelling practice club. Just shout it at the CR. I love her a little. I love the line about snakes being stepped on biting back. Such a perfect way to talk about their need to defend themselves. I'm so glad that Mel and Mandy are leading the group!! They're such good teachers and *hugs story*. I want to smack Hector just wanting to look out for himself through all this. It's pretty cool that each house has their own defense group!

Um, you know what this chapter is lacking? SNOGGING!

Oh hey, there's Sirius and Remus. :)

hehe, I like that Sirius and Mel dueled a bit. Now they should snog. ;) WHOO! SNOGGING!!

O.O I need the next chapter now! This was amazing. And I have no idea why the scarecrow got an award.

-Rose

Author's Response: I had to, your consistently wonderful reviews have been one of the best things about posting this story!

Hehe, I'm glad you liked April Fools :p Melanie isn't technically a pureblood, as her granddad (who was mentioned like twice) is Muggle-born, but she definitely knows as much about electricity as your average pureblood! Well, if they were heirloom china dishes... they *were* heirloom china dishes :p

I'm really glad you liked the cemetery scene too. There was never closure before so I think they needed that.

Oh goodness, I'm just imagining the types of clothing Mandy would design and coming up with all these hilarious images in my mind. I think her sense of fashion is quite silly :p

Yay! Its great to hear that you like their defense group and the way they lead it. With Hector... it's not so much that he's only looking out for himself, more that he's a pacifist. He believes in the cause that his friends want to fight for, and he supports them, but he doesn't want anything to do with war.

hold your hippogriffs, I wouldn't leave a chapter that's dedicated to you without any snogging scenes. Next time I'll put a little disclaimer at the top of the chapter that says "Scroll to line 37 for the snogging."

I'll put up the next chapter after my entry to your Princess Bride challenge gets validated ;)

And the scarecrow won an award because he was OUTSTANDING IN HIS FIELD. Ba-dum chhh.


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Review #10, by Niharika The Long Road

7th March 2014:
Thanks for writing these :) I really enjoy reading it. I like how you put in the part about the Marauder's Map getting confiscated. Thanks for sticking to J.K.'s version of events!

Author's Response: Ooh, thank you so much! I am thrilled that you enjoy the story. I try to include as much canon stuff as I can and keep the story in JK's fantastic world, so I'm glad you liked the inclusion of the map being confiscated. Thanks so much for your review!

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Review #11, by J E P Andela Stepping on a Serpent

7th March 2014:
Oh, I've always been attached to the marauders era. It seemed like such a joyous time, especially at Hogwarts. I wish it would never end.

But as always, the lovely stories always comes to an end too quickly. I believe Hogwarts was at its biggest glory those days.

I miss Charlotte, I think she would have been proud to see the dueling clubs! and that Mel got accepted for the Department of Mysteries! That's so cool.

It was a nice touch when they went to her grave. I almost cried. Really.

I realise I'm useless at leaving reviews and I wish I could write something special, 'cause your writing keeps me coming back to this site only to read this wonderful story! You really deserves the best!!

Thank you, for sharing this with me, and everyone else that's lucky enough to find it!

Love, JP

Author's Response: I think the Marauders era would have been so much fun too! Definitely joyous for the most part, but the war was simmering in the background the whole time - so it's kind of the best and the worst of times. (...Not trying to quote Dickens there but it's an applicable statement haha)

I missed writing Charlotte too - I think she'd have enjoyed the duelling team, yeah. Aw, I'm glad that scene at the grave was touching though. And yay for Mel getting accepted at the Dept of Mysteries!

You are absolutely *not* useless at leaving reviews - all your reviews have been SO amazing and put a smile on my face every time! ♥ I appreciate it so much! I am so flattered by your compliments on my writing. Thank you so much, it is wonderful to hear that you've been enjoying the story!

Don't worry though, it's not over yet! There are still three more chapters (well, one more and then a long epilogue) ;)


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Review #12, by oldnumberseven  The Long Road

4th March 2014:
Hello there! I'm sorry that this is the only review I've written so far - because normally when I really like a story, I review every chapter - but I've been swamped with my own story, work, etc. So I apologize for not showing this fic more love, but hopefully this will sort of make up for it ;)

I adore your plot. Adore it to bits! I really only read Marauder fics these days so usually I come across the same recycled plot lines - and since I've been on this site for a number of years, I can tell you that they get old. Well, I shouldn't say that. Some cliches can be done if the writer breathes life into them ... but I'm rambling now. What I really want to say is that I love Melanie. She's fresh, original, and the main reason why I kept reading.

I love that she's a Slytherin because it adds to all the sexual tension between her and Sirius; "Omg, I like you, but you're a Slytherin so therefore I should hate you" kind of stuff. But even though she isn't your typical Slytherin because she runs away from her pureblood family - love that part by the way, love it! - she still has some "snake like" features, if you know what I mean. She's feisty! It's also so awesome that she's a prankster. And not one of those 5th Marauder types, but someone who actually enjoys the sport of it all.

So her relationship with Sirius is fabulous. They have these really tender moments, yet they are both rather stubborn and not willing to acknowledge their true feelings, so they have some dramatic ones as well. But that's why I love them together - I feel like Sirius has to end up with a strong female type who he butts heads with every so often :)

And her friends! Melanie is surrounded by some wonderful OCs! I have to admit, I wasn't very fond of Mandy in the beginning, but she's grown on me. And Charlotte, oh Charlotte. Horrible way to go, but I'm glad Melanie is trying to better herself because of it.

I have only one critique. I love/completely support Melanie running away from her family, but I was expecting a little bit more backlash. Now I admit that I'm writing this review several chapters after the event, so I could be totally forgetting a lot of stuff ... but I kept wanting someone in Slytherin to start talking down to her or pranking her behind her back. It seems that they all sort of let it go and didn't bother her at all. If someone like Charlotte died because she rejected the Dark Lord's principles, I thought something scarier was going to happen to Melanie as well. But this is only something minor, because I love that most of her Slytherin friends don't care. I just thought that maybe Snape or Lester would pick on her more.

But overall, this is a fantastic fic. Seriously, way to go - great writing!!

:D

Carly

Author's Response: Ugudjvydjdgvxdghd

Hi Carly! This is such a lovely review - of course I don't mind that you haven't reviewed every chapter because I totally understand that people have lives outside of hpff. But your amazing and thoughtful review is like a warm blanket I want to wrap myself in forever. Ok so now I'll try to respond properly rather than just gushing hehe.

It is SO great to hear that you love the plot and that Melanie is original. I'm glad you like the Slytherin aspect too - I wanted to show that rivalry in a fun way, and kind of a better side to Slytherin than is shown in the books. That said, I'm glad you see the standard snake qualities in her as well.

Heh, yeah I think Sirius needed to be with someone who challenges him sometimes - I'm glad you agree and that you like them together! :D I'm all about strong female characters.

Lol, Mandy can be shallow and frivolous but she has a good heart. I think she's grown up since the beginning. Yeah... I really hated writing that part with Charlotte, but I had to... :(

You make a good point about the rest of the Slytherins and how they'd probably react if they knew, but she didn't tell anyone but her closest friends. Over time some people probably did find out, but I don't know that the entirety of Slytherin house would be aware of the specifics, or that Melanie would be particularly bothered by Jasper's opinion of her anymore.

Gah, I can't thank you enough for this fantastic review! I appreciate it so much!! ♥


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Review #13, by Maelody A Message and a Mess

2nd March 2014:
Haha, I'm just going to go with yes on what I've PMed you! :D

Your chapters NEVER disappoint! I'm so happy with this story, and I love, simply just LOVE how you write the Marauders! They're so hard to get down, and you do a wonderful job at it! You're so creative with the pranks! I'm jealous! haha :)

Melanie has a brother? Ooh,I hope she's overreacting. A bond with your sibling is always important! Then again, maybe the bond of losing a brother to the dark side would create a bond between her and Sirius... Oh I just can't decided if I want her with Remus or Sirius yet! xD

I love Sirius here! "I understand you can't help falling for me. But you know, you could have just given the flowers to me; you didn't have to bow down at my feet." So him! So smooth, and so cheesy! xD And the fact that James gives Filch flowers everything is something I definitely see him doing. Poor guy. Those crazy kids probably made him even crazier than he was!

I like Amanda. She seems like a great friend! "Something a little more subtle, maybe," cracked me up! That's something along the lines of how my own best friend and I would banter.

To make this a little more relative to why I'm posting right this moment, I really like how Melanie and her friends are in Slytherin, but they're really not that into it. Sure, they feel their belonging (aside from Amanda), but they're not as caught up into everything as all the others seem to be. To see the Marauders befriend them in the manner that they have is interesting as well. In a time where you think they wouldn't give Slytherins the light of day, you explain very well how they've started to become friends. I love it, and you've captured the era and characters amazingly well!

Really, I've been hurrying myself through all of the speed dating entries so I could get back to this story and start catching up! I'm so glad I have, because I feel like you've nearly finished updating it on here, haven't you? You're like, 35 chapters in! That's amazing! :)

Anyway, I can't wait to read what these snakes and lions have planned for each other next! The vine trick was pretty intense, magic-wise, and the lily touch was a nice additive ;). Will Filch catch them? Or start sneezing so bad they run away without being seen? Can't wait!

~Mae

Author's Response: Gaaa! You are amazing! hfisjchfisj siriusly this review has me smiling from ear to ear.

Uh. I didn't know I had a PM, thanks for letting me know and I will read it :p

I am so glad you like the way I write the Marauders! It's pretty important to me since they are, obviously, quite important to the story haha. I love coming up with pranks for them to do XD it's probably the basis for like half the story hahaha.

Her brother was briefly mentioned in the first chapter, and yeah, there's definitely more to come concerning him.

I'm glad Melanie's friendship with Mandy reminds you of you and your best friend - that's a great compliment!

Ahh thank you! I really think Slytherin house got the short end of the stick in the books, as Harry's general interactions with them weren't that positive - and it was really just Malfoy. Slytherins obviously are not all future Death Eaters - I really enjoy writing just normal Slytherins. And thanks, I'm so glad that it seems their rivalry/friendship is progressing naturally and that I've captured the era well! I'm just going to happily bask in these compliments for a while :)

Yeah, there's only 4 chapters left to be posted here.

Thank you so so much for this wonderful review! ♥ ♥ It totally made my day!


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Review #14, by toomanycurls The Long Road

17th February 2014:
You can't just post a chapter and not sky write it for me to see on my way home from work.

I love that Melanie is hoping to make Charlotte's death mean something. Thanks for the feels - thanks for the feels. I am glad that M&M are trying to be more aware and involved. That's the best thing to be in these times. Oh their planning for figuring out how to trust people after school is cute and sad (emotionally sad, not pathetic). They're facing such adult problems and they're only 17.

I'm happy that Nathan wrote and wants to meet up but where's Admiral Akbar??! someone needs to tell her "IT'S A TRAP!" I'm glad Sirius is going with her - he has a great point about Charlotte having gone to see her brother in Hogsmeade too. IF YOU KILL MEL I'LL... well, I don't know what I'll do.

BUT, YAY! HE'S TRYING TO ESCAPE! I hope he makes it okay and that Peter doesn't rat him out after she tells all her friends where he's gone (rather who he's staying with).

I love that you wrote about them losing the map to Filch. I LOVE CANON STUFF HAPPENING!

oh man, seeing the thestrals was just another reminder that they lost Charlotte. :(

Sirius is giving Mel a lot to remember for just two weeks. ;) hehe, I got a giggle about them being the last off the train!

Love this! and i'm still reading!! ME! *jumps up and down*

-Rose

Author's Response: Rose! Aaa I'm so sorry about the monstrous delay to this fabulous review! I haven't had internet since the day I submitted it - that explains the lack of writing it across the sky. Next time I'll make sure to include it when I write my "Surrender, Dorothy" message in the sky.

Yeah, I think once Mel comes to terms with death, it's kind of a wake up call to really live, so she's beginning to get more involved and aware now. Gah I know, only 17. They had to grow up fast.

That meeting with Nathan definitely could have been a trap - I think both Mandy and Sirius tried the Admiral Ackbar advice on her though haha!

Other than Sirius, Mel isn't telling anyone about Nathan... even he doesnt know where he's going, anyway.

Yay! Thank you, I'm glad you liked that! I try to include as many subtle canon things as possible :)

Lolol. Yep there needed to be snogging in this chapter after a few chapters without. Otherwise you'd point out that there could have been snogging in that scene.

hehe, I'm glad you are still reading. I think you're the only one. No big, I'll just dedicate all future chapters to you! ;) Thanks again for your review, I appreciate it so much!


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Review #15, by Maelody Curses and Cheers

11th February 2014:
Eck, I don't like Elliot. Then again, something would be wrong if I did I guess haha.

I think it was really sweet what the students at the end were saying. It really would be a surprise back then if any Slytherin were outwardly nice.

So I'm wondering why Sirius is just always around haha. And the fact that he said he wasn't a matchmaker and that he thought Remus would choose any other girl cracked me up. Talk about a slap in the face haha. Though I'm really loving the whole process. It's been a while since I've really read a good marauder fic. :) I almost don't regret not reading it all those years ago cause now I get to enjoy it here when I really need a good laugh and story! Can't wait to move on! :D

~Mae

Author's Response: Mae! You're spoiling me haha - everytime I log in I have a new review from you, and it's so exciting that I feel like getting up and dancing.

Yeah, he's not the nicest person..

I'm glad you liked that at the end. You know, I've always felt that the Slytherin reputation got worse through time, especially after the first war, so it might not have been as bad during the Marauders' time as in Harry's. But yeah either way, I doubt they were that popular among the other houses.

I'm sure Melanie is wondering the same thing haha. I'm so glad you are liking the story so far! Lol honestly it's probably best that you waited to read it, the quality of writing wasn't as good back in 2007 when I started and it's been edited since I first posted it at CoS haha. I hope you continue to enjoy the story! Thanks for your review!!



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Review #16, by Maelody Tricks and Treats, But Mostly Tricks

11th February 2014:
That's a lot of chocolate! I'd say he must only be in it for the cards, but we all know that's a lie haha.

Ooooh, a marauder-off! How cool! You're actually really creative with your pranks, too! That's why I can't do marauder era well, because thinking if those are too hard!

I really think the dragon thing was really cool! I can just imagine it flying around the stone wall! It'd be so awesome if Filch didn't get rid of it. That'd be an awesome Hogwarts secret, and to think of the students who would come across t in later hours!

Haha, where did WoodHouse come from? A unique name indeed for a cat.

Poor cyclops statue! I hope someone thought to repair him in passing. As we all know very well, the artwork in Hogwarts have lifelike ways, too.

""In case you were wondering about it, don't paint the gargoyles." XD that in itself just explains everything. Just don't. They don't like it haha.

This was a very delightful chapter! Lots of yummy Remmy! It's cool cause you still emphasize that he's a prankster after all. He's not in this group for no reason. I think some people forget that and always use him to just tell the others "no" just to follow after then anyway.

In reality, I read this last night, so I was really really tired by the time I needed to review, so I'm sorry if I'm forgetting anything. It was a great chapter though! Excited to move on! :)

~Mae

Author's Response: Remus is always in it for the chocolate hehe.

ooh, thank you! I love coming up with their pranks, so much fun. I'm glad they are fun to read as well!

Mrs Woodhouse... well, since her successor Mrs Norris is named after a character from a Jane Austen novel (Mansfield Park, I think) I took the name for this one from Emma, another Austen novel :)

I'm sure rhe cyclops was returned to its former glory eventually, yes. And the painted gargoyle.

I think Remus could easily have been the mastermind behind a lot of them Marauders' pranks - or at least the wel thought out ones - but since he's quieter and doesn't show off as much, he can get away with more ;)

Thank you so much for reading and reviewing - I really appreciate it!


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Review #17, by Maelody Business as Usual

11th February 2014:
Hey, look at that! I'm finally back! :D I'm so so so excited to actually get to sit down and read this now! :)

Ok, so I really like how this story focuses on how even in the marauder times, not all Slytherins are bad. You don't see that in a lot of marauder fics, and I think it's great to see something new. Melanie and Mandy are a great duo! With being anti-marauders, and not the average Slytherin, they are very likable. I'm still warming up to Charlotte since there hasn't been a whole lot of her yet.

I like how subtle you are when mentioning things that happened in the books. Like the fallout between Lily and Sev. We all know what happened, but if we didn't, it's the perfect amount of information to go off of to know they fell out. And I love your marauders. Especially Remus. I don't know why specifically him, other than how I liked the part where he handed her book back. Peter was pretty cool, too actually. You do your marauders well ;).

Well, I really like it so far. This is my favorite era! So I can't wait to read on!

~Mae

Author's Response: Mae ♥ It's wonderful to see you back!

I'm really glad you like Melanie and Mandy, and the focus on the lesser explored side of Slytherin. Slytherins really don't often get shown in a great light from other POVs but of course they can't all be evil, that would be ridiculous. :p Charlotte does take some warming up to, though.

I'm glad you like the subtlety too. Harry knew a lot about everything but I don't think everyone at the time had all the details the way he did! I think there's quite a few occasions in this fic where the characters have no idea what's going on, but the reader knows. Aah I'm so happy you like my portrayal of the Marauders too! I've always seen Remus as the nicest, and most likely to be friendly to a Slytherin. And though I hate Peter for what he did later, he was their friend at this time so hecan't have been too dislikeable then :p

Thank you so so much for reading and for this lovely surprise review!


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Review #18, by Rumpelstiltskin Progression

11th February 2014:
Okay I'm here now! :D (I said, announcing myself like I'm important...)

Whoo Apparition! Aw, Melanie will be able to do it in due time. I also would like to know what twirling with more deliberation involves/means. Whatever it means, she did it!! Well, kind of... and that's enough for one day :). You have to love her train of thought.

And Luke is back. Perhaps Peeves can permanently adhere the trash bin to his head ;). I shouldn't be so hard on him, because I really have no reason to hate him...but...Sirius!

Happy Birthday, Remus! The Marauders should try to make it a point to see the girls (it's not very nice). What? Omg guys you can't just do that in the corridors? -_- Only James Potter would strap brooms to his feet and race somebody. Though, I could see Sirius and James switching places in this scenario, so I guess I should say, only James or Sirius.

Things ARE more fun when you don't feel like you're suffocating ;). Ooh, patronous! Before I read the next chapter, I'll look up the qualities behind a horse and a fox...because I'm too tired to do extra research right now. *Cough* And, of course, I have to do that or else I'll drive myself crazy. :D

Well, yeah...Sirius is obnoxious, but he's adorable so that completely makes up for it, right? *Cough* I'm still waving the anti-Luke flag!

Happy Birthday, James! See? Sirius is adorable! :D.

Happy Birthday, Mandy!

Okay, I think I covered all of the birthdays ;).

Awesome job, as always.

-Rumpel

Author's Response: *plays trumpet for the fanfare of the arrival of Rumpel*

Ha, I'm glad you enjoy Melanie's train of thought. I myself wonder what twirling with deliberation is. Apparition sounds impossible for people who get distracted easily. I'd end up splinching myself everywhere. On the bright side though, that means I could be in two places at once!

Anyway. Haha, I love reading your criticism of Luke :D

No one tells James and Sirius you can't do that. They are a bit out of control arent they. What is Hogwarts without absurd excitement in the corridors?

haha, I'm one of those people who likes symbolism too, so I can't blame you for looking it up!

There are way too many birthdays in this chapter. I should have put Mandy's at a different time! :p Oh well, a chapter of birthday festivities.

Thank you so much for your review ♥


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Review #19, by toomanycurls Echoes

9th February 2014:
DUDE!

did you have to kill her? did you have to make me cry? Now I regret all the bad thoughts I had about Charlotte. I can't believe her own brother did that. My heart is breaking and and :'(

Everything about this chapter gave me the feels. Serious, deep feels. never kill anyone again because I don't know if i could take it. You do grief too well.

I was glad that Nathan felt regret for being on Voldemort's side after seeing what it meant. At least he's not completely evil.

Mel's sadness was just overwhelming. Her sadness and apathy after Charlotte's death is just too real. I am glad that it at least caused Rachel and Alanna to rethink what it means for purebloods to be all high and mighty.

I thought I was done crying over this until you talked about Charlotte saying she'd come back as a ghost and Mel's hope - that stupid, impossible hope people get after they lose someone - that she'd be there in spirit.

Mel's return to class was quite emotional for me too - I loved Lily's quiet support and Sirius sticking by her side. I especially liked that Mel realized that people care about her and had cared about Charlotte.

YAY! SIRIUS TOLD MEL ABOUT HIS SPECIAL DOG POWA! I really needed something slightly fluffy here - thank you. I love that he brought her tea and got Mel to leave her room of sadness. yay for a ray of hope.

for the first time I'll agree with your decision to not have snogging in the chapter

-Rose

Author's Response: Gah, I'm sorry *hands over tissue* I didn't want to write this either. I was in a horrible mood after writing this chapter - it felt like it was one of my own friends who had died, rather than a fictional character.

It was an accident, although that doesn't make it any better - it was a pointless death, but I think there were probably a lot of those during the war, people who weren't involved and suffered anyway.

Thank you so much though - I am glad it was touching. It really means a lot to me that you were able to connect with it so much.

This chapter was so emotional that I thought it needed something a little lighter at the end. I'm glad you liked that part!

*hugs* because I think that's necessary after this chapter. Thanks so much for reading and for you review ♥


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Review #20, by Rumpelstiltskin About Time

7th February 2014:
:D Squeezing in swaps! Rose is a ninja ;).

Pfft, Luke. Never mind Luke, isn't there a certain grey-eyed Gryffindor that you are supposed to be having feelings for, instead? No? Well then, ignore me. (Grumble, grumble.)

See? He's all "I'm a prefect and you shouldn't buy blah, blah, blah." Melanie is a prankster! They don't work...nope. (Okay, I'll be good now. I think it's all out of my system.)

Oh yeah, I'd imagine the feeling she must have, wondering if her own brother was responsible for any of the deaths that she hears of. That has to be terrible.

Oops, she accidentally walked through Nearly-Headless Nick. Aha, I love how she asked him how he died :D, that was pretty awesome.

Sirius is horny! Erm, I of course mean in the respect that he HAS actual, physical horns. :D I so wanted to say that!

Awe, Snape in a cloud of butterflies! That will make my week! I can imagine that he's thrilled about the butterflies...and the steam. Er, I suppose he shouldn't be throwing around dark curses and whatnot. Bad Snape. Punishment by butterflies! :D

I didn't think she went for the boring prefect type with a weird nose either, Sirius. *Sigh*

Awesome chapter, aw, silly pranks make me laugh, and laugh, and laugh!

-Rumpel

Author's Response: Heheh, you're not the first reviewer to think that about Luke. I think Melanie is the only person who finds him interesting haha.

Yeah, the war has definitely put her in a confusing place at the moment.

That scene has absolutely nothing to do with anything, but I love Nearly Headless Nick and felt the need to include him in the story haha. I'm glad you enjoyed that!

:p yes I imagine that there were many jokes of that nature at the Marauders table in class.

Snape with a cloud of pretty coloured butterflies, I am glad you liked that mental image :D

Yay, I'm so happy you liked this chapter! Thanks for your lovely review!


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Review #21, by SkyEcho Beginnings

6th February 2014:
Hey!!

What a great start :) I think your beginning really captured what it is to be 11. As wonderful as Hogwarts is, sometimes it's easy to forget that these first years are 11 years old...and they're off to a boarding school. You did an excellent job showcasing all of those conflicting nervous emotions through Melanie. I already like her. What I found particularly moving was seeing her question her father's beliefs while using the term, Mudblood - it shows her strength of character and mind, while also subtly reminding us that she is 11 and innocent to a lot of the darker meanings behind what she hears at home.

Now, this may sound odd, but prior to reading this, I hadn't really given much thought to the emotions and pressures these children would be faced with prior to the sorting ceremony. So thank you for exploring an area that is making me think! lol - You've done a fantastic job of showing just how overwhelming it is to make such a big choice - especially when the Houses are so tied to representing personal traits... The anxieties and confusion and insecurities around the characters regarding where they'll be placed felt really authentic.

Your shift in time was seamless and it was wonderful to see the younger versions of the characters we all know so well. It was cute to see James trying so hard with Lily and her having none of it haha.

Melanie is interesting and likeable. I found it refreshing to see Slytherin portrayed from a different angle. I'm so happy I happened across this story because it instantly grabbed my attention and I can't wait to find out all about Melanie's adventures at Hogwarts :)

Author's Response: Eee, thank you so much for such a wonderful review!

I am so glad you like Melanie as a character so far and think she seems like a 11 year old with all her confused feelings about going off to Hogwarts for the first time and being sorted. I am so glad they al seem realistic! I'm glad you picked up on that about the Mudblood thing too, that's exactly what I was going for, openminded but a bit sheltered.

That's wonderful to hear about the time jump too, that it was seamless. Ah thank you! I'm glad you liked James and Lily in there too, they are a lot of fun to write ;)

I am thrilled that you find the POV refreshing and that you're excited to read more! I am so happy you enjoyed it. This review really made my day! Thank you so much ♥ ♥ ♥


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Review #22, by LightLeviosa5443 Business as Usual

4th February 2014:
Hi! I am so sorry that I'm so late with your review! I'm horrible!

So, your concern was flow, characterization and if it was interesting or not. I loved loved loved the way you had this story flow. I love the way that the girls pranked the boys, and I love the way that the interaction with the Marauders went. I think that you were spot on with the way this story flows from start to finish.

The characterization, I think, is also really well done. I particularly love Remus. I think it was so believably fantastic that he would try to be nice and James and Sirius would make faces behind him. I never really focused on Peter much, but I think he also fits well with how we've perceived him from JK's writing. I love Mandy and Mel, as well. They're a great duo, and I kind of wish there had been a little more Charlotte in there! As for Mel's other roommates, they were hilarious and well-written as well!

Okay, so I guess I just really over-all loved this chapter!

Again, I'm so so sorry it took me so long!

xoxo Sarah

Author's Response: No worries! :D I appreciate the review!

Ah that is so great to hear, I'm glad you like the flow and the sections of the chapter weren't too choppy!

haha yeah, I imagined Remus would be the one who tries to be friendly while his friends are just twits. :p I am so glad to hear that you like the characters. Now that I look back at the chapter I am also wondering why I didn't include Charlotte more! Maybe I will have to go back and add another scene. Something to think about.

Thank you for your amazing review ♥


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Review #23, by J E P Andela Those Who Defied the Dark Lord

4th February 2014:
Please let her live! Charlotte is one of my favorite characters in this story, even though she's not in it as much as the others. She is awesome! A bit stupid perhaps, for going after her brother by herself without telling the others, but still!
There is never a dull moment when reading this story, just when everything seems to slow down something new is already coming. And it always makes me wait for a new chapter to be posted. Awesome.

I liked how it turned out with Octavius, a funny twist. It made me smile while reading that he was flirting with someone else. :)

Love the way you write, as always! Don't know how I will cope when this story is at end.

-JP-

Author's Response: Charlotte is my favourite of the OC's in here (other than Melanie). I'm really glad you like her too! Yeah she does tend to keep her feelings private, which ended up not working out too well for her here as Lester tried to recruit her for Voldemort.

ahhh thank you so much, I am so glad the story is exciting!

Hehe, glad you liked the way that turned out with Octavius. :p

Thanks so much for your lovely compliments about my writing ♥ There are still six more chapters to go until the end, so don't worry yet ;)


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Review #24, by toomanycurls Those Who Defied the Dark Lord

4th February 2014:
I'm going to start this off with THERE COULD BE SNOGGING! I haven't even read anything yet but, there could be snogging.

Why is Octavius privy to Voldemort's activities? Is he a fan? See!?! he's not a good fit for Mel!!

WHAT!?!?! Voldemort? Charlotte!?! O.O Oh no! She was doing stuff for Voldemort and and is being tortured and o.o

AND NOW MEL IS FACE TO FACE WITH HIM! Yay! She said not to Voldemort! I LOVE MEL! :( Why did Nathan have to be the one there torturing Charlotte? I'm so glad that Nathan is at least still decent enough to not torture his sister. :-/ is he redeemable?

alksfjlajflkajflf
your action scene and duel is so well written - I'm really jealous.

!!!I was so happy when James, Lily, and Sirius showed up to save the day! oh and Sirius' concern comes out! yay for death eaters! :P ARE THEY TOGETHER?!?! IS THAT THEM MAKING UP! I could hug you if that's true!!

oh yeah, Voldemort is still there. I love Sirius' insistance that he stay and help protect Mel.

Voldemort is such a coward to leave. I'm shocked he'd go so close to Hogwarts like that - he's lucky Dumbledore himself didn't come out and beat him up!!

ah! I can live with the death eaters and Charlotte's injury as long as Sirius and Mel are together again (for now).

Incredible chapter!

-Rose

Author's Response: Snogging in this chapter?! You have high standards. Maybe I'll rewrite it so Bellatrix is present, and so then Bellatrix and Voldy snog.

...ew.

Octavius isn't privy to Voldemort's plans, he has no more idea than Melanie does about what's going on in the beginning. He's a good guy actually. But nope not right for Mel ;)

Nathan is in a messy situation for sure... but yeah, part of him is still a decent person. It's definitely not black and white with him, he's more of a grey... more on him later.

Ahhh thank you! I'm so glad you like the action and battle scenes!

It only took a deadly battle with death eaters for them to admit they loved each other :p yes, they did make up as they realized there are much more important things to worry about.

lol yeah, Sirius' heart is in the right place as he wants to protect her, but he's not a whole lot of help since his leg is broken. Now she has to protect him :p They'll look out for each other though, they're a team :)

I thought it seemed like something Voldemort would do, to just leave the battle to his death eaters when its clear he will no longer gain anything from staying. Also as you mentioned he's probably worried about Dumbledore coming to beat him up.

Yep he was trying to get into Hogwarts- I think at this point he'd still have been trying to get his hands on the sword of Gryffindor or some other relic he can turn into a horcrux.

Thank you so so much for your review! ♥


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Review #25, by toomanycurls Ain't No Sunshine When He's Gone

3rd February 2014:
I might get a bit more shout-y in this chapter based on the title and summary. :P It's your own fault.

Oh boy, I know this will be a bumpy chapter when Sirius apologizes so soon and Mel hasn't warmed back up to him. I'm going to strangle Mel. and I thought Remus was bad :P

MEL SHOULD FALL APART AND THEN FALL INTO HIS ARMS!

I love that she's all decent to Remus and everything. *hugs Mel* Except then Remus is all self-depricating about it.

Remus! Please talk some sense into her!!

I am proud that Mel is pulling on her inner strength to get through this but for Merlin's sake! ah

...that was not trying to talk to him...

I'm hoping Mel and Mandy dig to the bottom of the anamagi secret. Just because I'd like that. :D

SIRIUS DID FALL FOR HER!! ugh

haha, *they* do call it having a picnic these days.

Maybe they're looking at each other when the other person isn't looking. :D

James to the rescue!! (again!) oh I love his explanation about standing by Sirius but not thinking he's right. that is the perfect because all friends have thought that about their friends.

alskfjlakjflkasjflkasjdflkaslfkjoierflkvlk

That is all.

-Rose

Author's Response: Well, save your vocal cords, because you'll probably need to do more yelling at me later :p I know, I know, I deserve it.

Yeah I would imagine this is quite frustrating to read especially since they broke up over something so stupid.

Of course Remus is self deprecating, would you expect anything else from him? :p Someone needs to talk some sense into him too.

Yes for inner strength, she's practically Rosie the Riveter. No man is going to upset her! Well... she doesn't *need* him around but she's certainly a lot happier when he is. This chapter is where she finally has to not take the easy way out like usual, because the problem won't fix itself.

yep, I think they were each looking when the other wasn't ;)

I think James is good at looking out for people he cares about. Of course, that's difficult when they're not speaking to one another...

Thanks so much for your review! I love it every time I get a review from you ♥


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