Reading Reviews for Purple
  
7 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Roots in Water Purple

11th September 2013:
Hello! It's Roots in Water here with your (much-delayed) review! I'm so sorry that it's taken me this long to actually write it- real life became kinda crazy for a little while and I never seemed to have enough time to actually sit down and write a review.

However, I am here now, should you still wish to read my comments. :)

Was this story worth the risk? Yes, I would definitely say that it was. I think that you did a really good job with this story. You could definitely see the passion Sirius had for Marlene. Moreover, you didn't overdo the passion. He's a male, typically considered the less sentimental/sappy gender , but he's in a position where he would have hours to ruminate on his feelings and his feelings alone. Therefore, his "sappiness" or inclination to talk about his feelings isn't odd, but rather fitting.

One thing that I did find a little odd was how much of his memories were happy. From what I remember from the books, Azkaban strips you of the ability to remember happy memories... And if Sirius transformed into a dog, I doubt that he would be able to remember as much of his life with Marlene as he did (but that's just my opinion. perhaps dogs have better interpretive skills than I give them credit for). Anyway, I thought that this would have a more melancholy slant.

(However, I suppose that you could argue that since Marlene died, all of his memories of her are tainted with sadness... Would that make the memories sad enough?)

I think that you did a good job with Sirius' characterization. Obviously, Sirius would not be very jokey in Azkaban... However, you did manage to include memories of past accidents and pranks, which kept in with the younger Sirius that we know, and there was a strength in his narration that definitely seemed in character.

Even though I know that the Remus/Sirius pairing was only mentioned in passing in this story, I still really did like the ease with which you wrote about Sirius' bisexuality.

Another thing that I think you did well here was the development of their relationship. It seemed realistic (no "all of sudden, from the first moment I met you, I knew you were the love of my life"), and the growth from friendship into romance is one of my favourite types of relationships.

All in all, I think that you did a good job with this one-shot. It definitely didn't show that this is something you consider to be outside of your comfort zone! Thanks for requesting a review and once again I am so sorry for the delay in its delivery.

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Review #2, by redraven Purple

10th August 2013:
Hey ReillyJade!

So tender and loving and not to mention simply heartbreaking! I love how this was told through Sirius' reminiscences, that approach really facilitated the creation of such intense sadness and loneliness. What really got me was when he'd ask all those rhetorical questions -- it really felt as though he was talking to her, or writing to her. I think you did a fine job representing Sirius. You're revealing a side of him that he probably wouldn't have let his friends see, yet are still addressing his strong sense of loyalty and his fun-loving attitude towards friendships and experiences. This story is so beautifully written I feel compelled to read it again (and not just because Sirius is my favorite HP character . . . )! Really well done! Thank you!

Best,
redraven

Author's Response: Hi redraven,

Thank you so much for your lovely review! I'm glad to hear the rhetorical questions added a little something. Including those isn't a typical stylistic choice of mine so I was skeptical to write it in such a manner.

Hearing that Sirius was well-represented means a lot coming from a Sirius fan! This was my first time writing him and I was so nervous about it; he's one of my favorites, too, and I really wanted to give him justice. It was a lot of fun getting inside his head, though. :p

Thanks again for the review - it's much appreciated!

Cheers,
Reilly


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Review #3, by academica Purple

9th August 2013:
Hello, I'm here with your requested review :)

Well, your emotion was definitely effective, because I'm tearing up a little bit! Seriously, though, the tone of this piece was really beautiful and I applaud you for sticking to it throughout the narrative, because it must have been difficult to write those happy moments knowing that eventually Sirius's joy would come to an end.

As far as characterization--it was nice to read a portrayal of Sirius where he's actually mature and willing to admit having real feelings for someone and not just moping about the death of his youth and the fact that James has a wife and child now. I'm so used to reading Sirius-the-playboy that it was actually a bit jarring for me to read about him wishing he was getting married to Marlene here. I kind of have to wonder why he didn't--maybe he was waiting for things with the war to settle down? Unfortunately, the chance for that didn't come :( I'm just thinking about what Molly once said about being quick to get married because you never know what the war will bring. Anyway, I think you did a good job keeping him consistent throughout the piece and lending some depth to a character who really does deserve it.

The story also struck me as being very believable, probably because you inserted so many "normal," small moments that people actually could go through, like spilling a drink accidentally or just having fun at a friend's wedding. I guess the only thing that might have added more would be to put a bit more emphasis on the fact that even the rocky part of relationships can be quite beautiful. Did Sirius and Marlene ever have serious fights? Did he ever do anything really reckless with her? I loved the moments here that really tested him, like crying in front of her and having to face her funeral, and I think playing those up more would add even more depth to his characterization here. For example, the way you described his life in prison in that last section was so poignant.

All in all, I think you did a really lovely job and this story turned out beautifully. Hope this review helps!

-Amanda

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Review #4, by Broken Butterfly Purple

15th July 2013:
Thanks for submitting this entry in the No happy ending challenge. This is well written. It flows very well, and I like how the scenes jump between years that Marlene and Sirius would have known each other. This is very melancholy, and I love it.

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Review #5, by Emma A. Purple

29th April 2013:
This is amazing! PLEASE write another :)

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Review #6, by BeautifulPeople Purple

2nd April 2013:
Beautiful. So beautiful.

Author's Response: Thank you so much! :)

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Review #7, by Courtney Dark Purple

31st March 2013:
Hey there! I'm Courtney, here for your requested review.

Wow. Those are the first words that come to mind after reading this incredible one-shot. I really don't know how to put into words what I feel after reading this but this is honestly one of the best one-shots I have read on this site! All the emotions felt so real, the memories flowed beautifully...I can't think of a single criticism!

Okay, I'll try and write a proper review now.

I think my favourite thing about this one-shot was how real and accurate you made Sirius' voice to be. I loved the memories you chose to write about and the way he reflected on them. All the events in this one-shot felt so real. I thought it was great that Sirius and Marlene slowly became friends and, for a while, were just that. I like that they didn't really become anything more until after they'd left school, because you don't see much of that in fanfiction anymore.

I liked how you talked about all those times Sirius spilled his drink on Marlene and, how at the end, he reflected that this could have all been because he was nervous around her. I thought that was a great touch!

The wedding scene was written really well, and I love how you incorporated the colour purple into it. And the dancing scene afterwards...beautiful! It made it seem even sadder when we found out that Marlene had died - that was when I actually guessed the girl was Marlene and the memory of Sirius talking about her death in one of the books and one of the movies came back to me.

The emotions you were able to portray in Sirius after Marlene had died were fabulous. I like the fact that he started drinking, and how he could only try to be excited when Harry was born. The fact that James and Lily didn't choose a godmother because they were going to choose Marlene was a very nice touch, too.

The end scene in Azkaban tied the whole one-shot together nicely. The way you described how Sirius felt, sitting in the cell, thinking back onto the lives that have been lost and how Peter betrayed them...I really don't think that could've been written any better. I also think you interwove the song lyrics very well.

Overall, this was a very well-written piece, and I really enjoyed reading it!

Courtney:)

Author's Response: Hi Courtney!

Thank you so, so much for your lovely review! It always means a lot when someone enjoys a story of mine, but seeing as this was my first attempt writing Sirius and I was incredibly nervous about doing so, that makes your comments extra special. :)

I'm really happy that you didn't guess who he was talking about until later on in the fic; I was worried I'd either made it too obvious or too confusing. Seeing as most people forget Marlene is even a character, I'm glad you knew who she was.

The wedding/dancing scene was my favorite part to write, actually. :)

Again, thank you so very much for your wonderful review. It really did make my day! Cheers!


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