Reading Reviews for A Little. Clumsy.
1 Reviews Found

Review #1, by teh tarik New edition to Camp Hagrid

30th April 2013:
Hi there :) I was browsing through the Recently Added and saw your story and decided to come check it out.

Well, this was such a fun and entertaining start! I love the little friendship trios in this chapter - between Allie, Maisie and Jazz and between Fred, James and Harley. The banter was funny and all in all, this was a really fun and fluffy read. Especially loved how Mason slung Alex on his back and pretty much piggy-backed her all the way to Hagrid's. And I'm glad Hagrid is in this story! I don't know how old he'll be here; I'm assuming his giant blood sort of makes him stronger than normal human beings and he has a longer life span (I can't say the same for McGonagall; it's a little strange that she'll still be teaching considering she must be in her nineties by now :P ). You've written Hagrid tremendously well; he;s that fun but ineffectual person; he really does try to be a good 'teacher' figure and make the students obey the rules (no after-dark wanderings etc.), but often he can't control them. Whatever they do, he's always on their side, though.

I think Allie's section of the story is a lot stronger than Fred's. Her characterisation is certainly better defined. The switch of POVs was a little choppy, and personally, I'd have preferred to read the entire chapter through Allie's POV, and let Fred narrate in the next chapter. But this is just my personal opinion, and you needn't really take me up on this.

Anyway, this is a lovely start! Good luck with writing the rest of the fic ^.^


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