11 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Karou_Marauder Chapter 1

11th July 2014:
Hi there!

Okay, so I want to get this out of the way first: "Dad had quickly followed, as had Filius, despite his lack of invitation into their home)"
There's a random bracket after 'home' that you don't need.

"a truly exhausting day. Hermione's had" This is in the last paragraph - I think you mean her parents?

Now that's over with, I really liked it! It's a Missing Moment-type scene. You've got Hermione's bookishness down - I love how her first bit of magic was to keep her book dry! And Flitwick seems to be his normal enthusiastic self.

I think it's funny how Hermione didn't realise her dad didn't remember, and that Flitwick had to give him his memory back. And that was a nice bit about Justin Finch-Fletchley.

-Karou, 2014 House Cup Review

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Review #2, by jim Chapter 1

9th February 2014:
liked it and it was nice to read and short too

Author's Response: Thank you very much :)

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Review #3, by LaLaLuna Chapter 1

3rd January 2014:
Nice story! Fun to read, the pacing was good, and I really loved Hermione's examples of underage magic. I also really enjoyed her parent's reaction, as they were painted as being more tolerant of magic in the books and you showed that well here.

Author's Response: Thank you! I always imagined Hermione's parents as only ever wanting the best for her, and being completely understanding of her being a witch, I'm glad that came across here and that you enjoyed it :)

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Review #4, by marauderfan Chapter 1

17th November 2013:
Hi again! I really enjoyed this little one-shot about Hermione before she went to Hogwarts. You managed to write her just as I would imagine her to be at age eleven - rationalising the letter as a practical joke, still logically thinking over all the times strange things had happened... and then at the end reading Hogwarts A History. I think you really captured her voice in this, and her practicality even as a child.

Loved that it was Flitwick who came to give her the introduction to the magical world, and makes candles fly around the room. That scene actually reminded me a little of when Dumbledore visited the Dursleys in HBP and made wine glasses bump them on the head. So, not really the same circumstances at all, I just loved the parallel of wizards having no boundaries and inviting themselves into houses - it seems to be something they all do, haha! :p

This was a really enjoyable read, I loved it!

Author's Response: I am just TERRIBLE for taking so long to reply to this, sorry!!

I'm so pleased you liked my portrayal of Hermione before Hogwarts, I found it tough to get a good balance between showing her intelligent and practical side, and her still being only 10/11 years old. She's always been one of my favourite characters to write but this was my first attempt at writing her pre-Hogwarts.

Dumbledore's visit to the Dursely's was my inspiration for that part with Flitwick, I completely agree that they have no boundaries when it comes to Muggles, it's one of the many reasons I love them!

Thank you so much for the unexpected review, I'm so gladd you liked it!


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Review #5, by Guestyfish Chapter 1

7th September 2013:
This was really cute! I enjoyed reading it. ^^ Amusing that Flitwick was the one who came to inform her. Would have been interesting to see McGonagall in there, but I like it as-is, too. :3

Author's Response: Thank you! I did consider McGonagall but think Flitwick was more fun :D Glad you liked it anyway though!

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Review #6, by HermioneeeGrangerrr Chapter 1

3rd September 2013:
How typical of Hermione to read Hogwarts a history.

Author's Response: Haha, I know, I couldn't resist!

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Review #7, by Owlpost68 Chapter 1

29th June 2013:
I loved the little bits you included of Hermione's childhood. It would explain why she was so good at the Lumos Harem spell with the Devils snare.
Great job!

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you liked it :)

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Review #8, by marauder5 Chapter 1

25th May 2013:
So, I saw on the forums that today is your birthday and decided to drop by and give you a little birthday present - in other words, a review. I also want to wish you Happy Birthday, of course, and I hope you'll have a lovely day with lovely people, etc.

This story was so sweet! All we really know about Muggle-borns getting into Hogwarts is that someone comes over to them to explain, and I really enjoyed reading your take on it! It's interesting to imagine how it might go down.

You've captured Hermione so well in this! I love the fact that she, despite those strange things having happened to her, doesn't accept the existence of magic right away. It's very true to her character, because she is such a logical person, and magic is about as far from logic as you can get. Also, I loved how much of a bookworm she was already. The fact that one of her magic performances during childhood was saving a book from the rain, haha! ;)

The fact that Dedalus Diggle was the one to visit them was great as well! I liked his comment about Justin Finch-Fletchley, it made me laugh :D

Another interesting thing was the fact that Hermione's parents hadn't seen that much of her magic. It must be even more shocking for them than for her. I think the story about the swimming pool was my favourite flashback, by the way, and how the Muggles blamed it on the draining system. Brilliant!

I did notice a few typos, so I thought I'd point them out for you:

"her parents went dentists" - it should be 'were' instead of went
"All of the other pupils had races" - should be 'raced'
"Hermione came to the conclusion that he hasn't actually" - he 'hadn't' actually..
"Was it her that had done it?" - was it her 'who' had done it
"Hermione's had sent her to bed" - the word 'parents' is missing here, I presume?
"Dedalus spent another or so with the family" - another case of a missing word; maybe he spent another 'hour' or so with them?

All in all, I think that you've done a really good job on this one! Happy birthday again! :D

Author's Response: Hello! Thank you do much for the birthday review, it was very sweet of you :)

It means a lot to read that you think I've captured Hermione's personality, it's something I work very hard to do so I really appreciate the compliment!

Thank you so much for pointing out the typos, admittedly I didn't check this one over before posting, bad author! I'll go back and edit them :)

Thank you again for the lovely review and the birthday wishes xx


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Review #9, by Lululuna Chapter 1

27th April 2013:
This is such a wonderful one-shot! I thought this about your last story that I read as well: you really have a knack for writing the golden trio and staying true to their voices and personalities in the HP books. Hermione is so well portrayed here, she's thoughtful, perceptive, and a little arrogant. I loved how after reading her letter, she immediately went through all the evidence from her memories that indicated she could be a witch: this really showed what a logical thinker she is even as a child.

The stories of how she showed her magic at a young age were amazing!!! I especially loved the one about not wanting to get her book wet, it was just perfect.

I also really liked the description of Diggle, especially this line: "Whisps of white wiry hair were sticking out of the side above his ears." It really caught my eye with the alliteration, and I could picture Diggle perfectly in my head just from those few words. I also liked the focus on the letter: how even when Diggle is there, he insists on showing it to the parents instead of explaining out loud. It's as if the news needs to be read before it can be understood, and reminded me of Hagrid hanging Harry his letter!

Also, I laughed with the part about poor Justin fainting. The modifying of Mr. Granger's memory was an interesting touch: does it perhaps foreshadow what Hermione will do to her parents in six years?

Tiny bit of CC: the sentence starting "Dedalus spent another..." doesn't quite make sense, I think you need a couple extra words and periods in there. Also, I thought calling the parents "Hermione's mum" and "her dad" every time was a little distracting, maybe stick to either "Mum" and "Dad," or even "Mr. and Mrs. Granger" like they're called in the HP books? I just think it would flow a tiny bit smoother. :)

Overall though, I really enjoyed this and loved meeting pre-Hogwarts Hermione. Great job :)

Author's Response: Thank you so much!
Getting their personalities right is my main concern in my writing, it's difficult to write a character that isn't mine so it's lovely to know you think I got it right. I see a lot of Hermione in myself in the way that she thinks so tried to imagine how I would have reacted in this situation.
Dedalus was such a fun character to write, I love his eccentricity in his looks and personality, even when he is trying to be a professional :)
Thanks for the CC, it always comes in handy. I plan to edit this and my other one shots in the next few weeks so will definitley take your feedback in board. And thank you for the lovely review!


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Review #10, by lauraf68 Chapter 1

7th April 2013:
Very good interpretation of Hermione's life, you captured her personality well plus believable actions of her parents.

I think this is well written, however, I found a couple of spelling/grammar issues.
1) Last paragraph: "It had been a truly exhausting day. Hermione's had sent her to bed earlier" -- needs 'parents' added.
2) Near beginning: "Without a seconds warning the sky had turned black, the heavens had opened and it had poured." -- Too many had's. In my opinion the sentence would be better as, "Without a warning the sky turned black, the heavens opened, and it poured down rain.".

I will say that I was disappointed to see that this was only a one-shot chapter. I would have liked to see your interpretation of the Granger's in Diagon Alley and Hermione receiving her wand. (Hint, hint)

I plan to check out your other stories and add you to my author list!! Happy writing! -Lauraf68

Author's Response: Thanks so much for the review! I plan to go back over my one shots once I've finished my longer story, I've noticed some bits in the others that need changed so will add your suggestions to the list :)
I have considered making this one a little longer, I've written a few odd paragraphs but nothing major, keep checking back ;)
Thanks again and I'm glad you enjoyed it!


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Review #11, by AllieGal22 Chapter 1

13th February 2013:
Your doing good! You describe Hermione perfectly, she fits just like her character in the book. I thought this was an interesting point of view, and enjoyed it very much!
xoxo,
Allie

Author's Response: Thank you so much :) I'm glad you enjoyed it! xx

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