I just read the four chapters you have posted and I love this story so far. You've given a lot of depth to the characters in such a short story. I think the emotions of the characters are also very realistic for people who are grieving - an alternating of being lost in sadness, and happy things to get their minds off the sadness.
Also, I really liked the third chapter - the one where you mentioned that "nothing happens, but everything happens". I really like that kind of chapter too because it seems so realistic; life doesn't follow a schedule. You've done a wonderful job with the story so far and I can't wait to read the concluding chapter!Author's Response: Thank you so much!
This was a story that, to me, really needed to be told. I wanted to showcase the way George is being tortured by this, the way things can be fine one moment and then it just hits him... over and over and over.
Thank you so much for the kind review and I really hope you like the last chapter! Report Review
The fact is that I am the worst. Literally the worst. I apologize for my horrible lack of loyalty and contribution to this relationship. I know I've promised before, but I really mean it this time. I will review! Just know that I read everything.
For the story up to this chapter, I love it. Very different for you. I like that you are challenging yourself with a much more serious story and subject. Liking the characters and what you are doing with them a lot.
Oh erotic novels. I am not sure if you are aware, but there are short erotic stories at the end of Cosmo. During recent Crafternoon sessions (where a group of us listen to music, make friendship bracelets, modpodge, etc), those stories have been featured as dramatic readings. Some insight into my college life to enlighten you.
“Please don’t be gone in the morning.”
- Awww. This hit me in the gut.
The room was dark, curtains drawn against the morning sun, so my eyes took a moment to adjust before I realized George was awake. He was sitting at the head of the bed, in the center, knees pulled to his chest as he rocked repeatedly into the headboard, sobbing. His fingers twisted in his hair.
I abandoned the tray on the dresser and fell into bed with him, pulling him into my arms. Light flooded in from the living room. His tears were wet against my shirt.
It was hard to see someone I cared about that much break like waves against rocks. His body shook. Eventually his fingers left his hair and clutched the back of my shirt. My body. He clung to me as he wept.
“He’s gone,” George whispered eventually. “He’s actually gone.”
- Okay, the last one hit me in the gut. This hit me in the heart. I feel so much for him. This is how I grieve. You captured it almost perfectly for me.
The way they get together feels natural. The emotions make sense with the actions that follow. It just works. I'm really glad you are telling this story.Author's Response: You're just a mean-hearted individual. Did you know that? JUST MEAN. I'VE BEEN LEFT HERE SOBBING.
I'm glad you are enjoying the story thus far. You're right in that it's very different of my fanfics. Usually I love humor and I did lace this with some humor, but it was just a story I had to tell. I knew it wouldn't be popular because most people don't want to read sad stories as much as I don't wnat to write them... but there are good things in the sadness, which is why I like it so much.
That is HILARIOUS. A Cosmo reading. I love that.
I think what I like the most about George's process is that it confuses even him. He doesn't understand and then suddenly it hits him...and this happens to him several times a day. I think a lot of people don't quite understand that so I wanted to showcase it with George.
Thank you so much and I hope you like the last chapter! Report Review
Just beautiful. I love the voice you've given to Angelina, and i love the way you discuss the pain of losing Fred amid swims and drinks. So well written.Author's Response: Thank you so much! It is definitely different for me to do, but it was a story I felt had to be told. So thank you for reading :) Report Review
You have two more chapters! Please write them. I love this story! It makes my heart all squeezie.Author's Response: i'm going! I'm going! It's hard updating 4 stories at once. Thank you! Report Review
Loved it! Update soon, pretty pretty please? :DAuthor's Response: Doing my best! Why on earth did I take on 4 stories? Report Review
Ah! I really, really liked this chapter. It really helped me understand Angie/George as friends, because last chapter they were both kind of miserable and less normal than this one. I liked the image of George in a tube-dress. It made me laugh. But this is a really solid chappie, and I'm looking forwards to the next one.
Shindig :DAuthor's Response: Thank you! I really liked the way this chapter came together. They are all kind of somber, but there are plenty of smily parts as well.
Thanks :) Report Review
Wow! This was simply beautiful. I'm quite relieved that Ang found George so quickly and I can't wait to find out what they get up to next, so please update soon! :)Author's Response: Thank you so much! there is something about the way they respond to each other I really love. Like they're the same, but so different.
Thanks :) Report Review
This story, so far, is amazing! I've never really read much George/Angelina, nor have I read much Fred/Angelina so this is quite fresh for me. I love your interpretation of the characters, especially Angelina. I love seeing this side of George as well; the one who won't laugh without his twin there beside him!
This was really, really touching and I'm not quite sure what I think. This makes me want to ship Fred/Angelina, but I love the prospect of George/Angelina. As I said, I haven't read much of either pairings so I'm not sure! :')
Emma xxAuthor's Response: This is the kind of story that has stuck with me for a long time. I made a reference to how Freddie's parents got together in Hormones, and ever since I wrote that one paragraph, I knew I had to tell this story. It needed to be said. Obviously not as many people will read i tbecuase, well, it's hard to read about dead Fred... but I had to tell it.
I hope you enjoy the rest!
Thank you! Report Review
Ah! It's finally here! It's amazing, and I absolutely love how you got George's personality in there. He generally isn't seen as a hugely complex character, but here you've really brought him to life; all his decisions make sense, but in a twisted, hurt way - it's really believable. Anyway, I don't have much time to have a mini freak out, but it's really great.
Shindig :DAuthor's Response: I always thought that way about George. He was always kind of pushed to one side. Things tended to favor Fred, and George is right. I'm glad I was able to bring him to life. Thank you! Report Review
Wow Mistress - your creative mind never ceases to amaze me! I could feel the emotion these characters were feeling and almost burst into tears reading the funeral scene. You should be very proud of yourself.Author's Response: Ah, thank you so much! I really appreciate it. I felt this was a story that really needed to be told. When I first wrote it in Hormones, the small paragraph about it, it stuck with me until now.
Thanks :) Report Review
It's amazing how within just a few short sentences I'm hooked and ready to cry. You truly do have a way with words and I am literally this close (fingers are centimeters apart) from crying. This was so emotional, without all of the sobbing and bawling and typical sad actions. I am already in love with this story!Author's Response: Aw, thank you so much. I hope I don't make you cry too much. The entire story isn't like that. I know it's so different from what I've written before, but it was a story I felt needed to be told.
Thank you! Report Review
Absolutely brilliant! Actually crying all the way through this, wonderfully written! Please update soon!:)
10/10Author's Response: Aw, thank you so much! I really hope you enjoy the rest of the story :) Report Review
First review!! YESS!! Anyway, this chapter was so touching. Honestly, I was nearly in tears. Fred's death hurt us all, hurt everyone that was touched by him, including myself, and reading this has got me missing him all over again. Though the tears may be because I actually did cry over another story today.
There are so many brilliant and heart-tugging moments in this story that I am currently compelled to quote right now, but I'm going to resist the urge because I would be quoting half the story if I did.
A beautiful first chapter Janice. And trust me when I say that I'm quite enjoying the less humour/fluff. It's different, and I like it :) Definitely looking forward to the next chapter :) A great intro to Ang and George.
I probably used the word touching too much. Note to self - use thesaurus.
-AbhiAuthor's Response: Look at you! REVIEW NUMBER ONE.
This story is definitely very, very different from my others. Not because I really wanted to make it differnet, but because it I thought it was a story that I needed to tell. Much sadder than my usual, but still with plenty of humor.
I'm glad you're on board. I know most people won't be such they're used to my humor and hey, who wants to read aobut George coping with his twin's death? but it was just really important for me to tell this story. Moreso for Freddie in Hormones.
thank you so much for reading and I really hope you like the rest! Report Review
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