Reading Reviews for Memories in Time
  
7 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Infinityx Memories like water

12th March 2014:
Hi there! I'm here for the review you requested. :)

This was such a lovely story to read! I love how you've incorporated such humorous moments into such a setting. Your ideas are wonderful and both the flashbacks had me laughing so hard! Good job there!

I think you've done a great job of characterizing Ron and Hermione. You've brought out Hermione's cleverness in such a nice way, easing it subtly into the story and also giving a great touch to her personality here. I really loved that detail about the fire. And also, the way she spoke to Pansy so politely was perfect!

Then of course, Ron. I like that bit about him trying to stop the wedding. He's as hotheaded as ever, so typical of him! I like how you haven't made him seem like the exact same person he was when he was in school. I've read a lot of fics where Ron behaves in an extremely immature manner, with no depth to him at all. They tend to forget that Ron's an adult, and more mature than he used to be. I love how you've incorporated that bit into his personality. He's more perceptive and understanding of Hermione's feelings and is good at comforting her as well. I think you've done an amazing job at characterizing him!

Plot was brilliant, and incredibly humorous. I love your idea behind this and I think you've done a great job at writing it. :)

CC:
I noticed quite a few spelling errors in this chapter, and there are also a lot of places where commas were missing. I suggest that you get a beta to look over that for you and clean this chapter up. There are a lot of great people on the forums who can help you out, and it would really help make this story perfect. The plot and characterizations are all good, so if the flow wouldn't be disrupted by these errors, then this would really be a super amazing read. :)

Also, some more descriptions would be nice. A bit more detail on the setting would help to make the mood of the story more prominent. And it would be lovely to read about Ron and Hermione's reactions to those embarrassing situations in more detail. For instance, you've written Hermione's face turned red, and Hermione's face turned the color of a tomato which both mean the same thing. Something other than the color of her face could be emphasized on. For example, Hermione wiped her brow in embarrassment, and gave Pansy a sheepish smile. She turned a stern gaze towards her son, which went unnoticed by the innocent kid. This is just an example. Lingering a bit more on each situation would really help the readers get into the whole scenario and connect to the emotions and what's happening. This is just a suggestion of course, feel free to ignore it if you don't agree. :)

Overall, I really enjoyed reading this! You've got some great ideas for humorous, light situations and I loved the whole premise for the story! Great job. :)

I hope this review wasn't too harsh. Feel free to PM me if you have any questions. Keep writing, and good luck!

~Erin

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Review #2, by Maelody Memories like water

7th March 2014:
Hey, Meg! :D

This was so cute, and so sweet! My mom did something similar to this with my dad and I went away to college. They told me embarrassing stories of myself, and embarrassing things I made them go through. It's great to see that everyone can look back and laugh at themselves and the situations they were in, even if it angered or embarrassed them at the time. :)

I love the added bit that Ron tried to stop the wedding from happening, and how Hermione wasn't happy but she as willing to sacrifice her hate for her daughter. It was cute how they bantered about Rose's choice and what would be Hugo's! Of course they'd worry! haha :)

This was sweet and all around adorable! :D Great job! :D

~Mae

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Review #3, by keyty Memories like water

6th March 2014:
Hello, here with your requested review!

This was very amusing. I like the little memories you made with Rose and Hugo. Very cute. I did catch quite a bit of errors; I would recommend getting a beta to look over the chapter to help point them out to you. I would also suggest using more commas. You had some long sentences that didn't have any pauses, which made the thoughts seem kind of long winded. Commas can be your best friend, you just need to know where to put them. :) Overall, I think this was a good story, you just need a bit of editing to make it even better!

Feel free to PM me for more feedback if you decide to make changes. I also look forward to seeing your FOB Challenge entry! :)

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Review #4, by TheHeirOfSlytherin Memories like water

4th March 2014:
For Blackout Bingo.

Hey!

So, I just can't resist a Ron/Hermione and I was very excited when I saw this. I understand how hard it is for parents to let their kids go (not personally, I was the kid my parents didn't want to let go), and I think you captured it really well. I don't know if mine reminisced, but I hope so - I know there are moments like this between me and mine. And that's what I really love about this story; it seems so real to me. I can see this happening between them.

The flashbacks were hilarious, I love little Rose and Hugo. They were so adorably innocent, just saying what they knew, not realizing that they were getting their parents into trouble. It was awesome.

The only thing that got to me was bits of wording that didn't make sense in my head. It made it a little hard to read. But a read-through would easily fix that. :)

I really enjoyed this story.

Sam.

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Review #5, by MissesWeasley123 Memories like water

14th July 2013:
Awee that was cute. Rose lolol that was hilarious!

Author's Response: MissesWeasley123,

I'm glad you liked it. It was a fun piece to write.

Meg


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Review #6, by alicia and anne Memories like water

30th December 2012:
The memories that Ron and Hermione had of their children was so funny. I loved that each of them embarassed their parent's by speaking without thinking, but they are children after all.
This was so funny :D I really enjoyed it.

Author's Response: Alicia and Anne,

Unfortunately, these are based on true events. LOL. The great thing is that my brothers did these things to my mother. My mom was mortified!

Thank you for reading and taking the time to review. It means much to me!

Meg


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Review #7, by EverDiggory Memories like water

27th December 2012:
Meg! How have you been hun? I know I've been telling you forever that I would update Playing Cinderella, which I will do. And I also have taken forever to get here!

I lvoed this, so adorable! I laughed a bit when Ron disapproved so much of Rose becoming a Malfoy, I thought it was cute and hilarious!

The last paragraph particularly stuck ouyt to me; heartwarming and absolutely cute! Great job hun! We need to catch up sometime!

xx

Ever

Author's Response: Ever,

It has been forever. Lol, I hope you continue with Playing Cinderella because the idea is so intriguing and Cinderella is my FAVORITE children's story. I read it to my daughter all the time. Hehe, it doesn't matter that she doesn't understand yet!

Lol, I actually based this on really events that my brothers did to my mom. My mom was mortified!! LOL. I know my day is coming.

Thanks for the review...

Meg


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