Wow. That is all I have to say. Truly impressive!Author's Response: Thank you so much for taking the time to review this! :) I had a lot of fun writing this one-shot -- and, of course, getting to live a bit in one of my favorite fan fiction stories, as it were. :P
So glad to hear from you, and I'm happy you enjoyed the story! ♥ Report Review
So I decided that I just had to pay you back for those lovely reviews you left for Sheer Abandon and The Badger's Den, and what do I find when I look at my list of fanfics I've read and need to get around to reviewing? This! How perfect! :D
When I read Run, I ended up with a serious case of the feels that my review was barely coherent and I still owe Sarah a proper review on Run with actual, comprehensive sentences and sufficient highlighting of what I loved. I turn to mush every time I think of Run, and the same has happened here. Your portrayal of the characters is just so canonical, both in the Run universe and in the HP era. I could see them in my mind's eye, and you captured the moment beautifully. ♥
I just love the way you created their challenge to be Inferi; and oh the feels I had when Severus looked into Inferi-Lily's eyes and that line: “Your eyes, Lily,” he whispered. He reached out a hand towards the Inferius. “What have they done to your eyes?”. Perfection itself. It portrayed brilliantly how Severus is cold and calculating when it comes to anything but Lily Evans. And of course, it also had the desired effect of making me melt into nothing but feels like ice cream on a hot summer day. ♥
I see in your author's note that you "don't pretend to have done things nearly as brilliantly as she did". I have to disagree. This was so amazing in the way that it matched Sarah's Run universe completely. It was so authentic that the first time I read it, I scrolled up the screen halfway through to double-check that the penname wasn't ToujoursPadfoot. *blushes*
I literally can't find any flaws in this wonderful one-shot, and I've read it three or four times so I'd definitely have picked up any by now. It's just *insert witty adjective here because I can't think of any that are worthy to describe this one-shot*. Seriously, I'm totally favouriting you. ;)Author's Response: You goose -- you didn't have to pay me back at all! :D I really, really enjoy your writing, and I do mean it when I say that you're talented. But nevertheless, seeing your name pop over here (and on this story, too!) really made me smile!
'Run' gave me basically the biggest case of feels ever, but that's one of Sarah's biggest talents, in my opinion -- she /knows/ people, and she can write them like no one I've ever met. You'll have to forgive my gushing, though, because she's one of my all-time favorite authors and I read everything she writes. :D But what I'm trying to say: The fact that you think this story is anything like 'Run' is one of the biggest compliments I've ever received, honestly.
That line about Snape's eyes is my favorite! ♥ If there is one thing you must know about my writing, it is that I will write pain over happiness any time, if the choice is there. Which is horrible, but that is what I enjoy writing! (Twisted?) We'll have to put you in the freezer, though, if you melt anymore. :3
YOU DID NOT SCROLL UP TO CHECK THAT THIS WASN'T SARAH'S PAGE. THAT COMMENT JUST MADE MY ENTIRE MONTH. ♥ Oh, I am literally on the edge of my chair right now. I'm so, so glad that you made that comparison, because I basically want to be Sarah when I grow up. On cloud nine over here!
You are too kind, Katie, too kind indeed. Honestly -- I don't even have enough words to thank you enough for leaving me this review. ♥ YOU ARE THE CAT'S PAJAMAS. I'm so flattered to have this!! Report Review
Wow Rachel! This is just amazing! I admit that I haven't gotten around to reading Run yet (though it is on my list of stuff to read) but I feel that this is jus absolutely wonderful and probably does a great job with the world she wrote in Run. To me this kind of reminds me of a Hunger Games type of a thing only with the dead as the tributes and instead of riches as the reward, its time on earth again. Your description in this is wonderful as always and I found myself completely enraptured with this oneshot! This is so beautifully written and just amazing and I really dont even know what else I can say! I loved the different povs that are smattered throughout this! It all flowed really well, even going from Snape to Cedric to Claudius, which in my opinion can be very hard to do, so great job on that! I loved the characterization of both Snape and Cedric in this, I thought they were spot on and really brought out the characters in this oneshot. My heart was pumping in this, which I assume is what you were going for, so you did an awesome job with the description and action scenes. Gah! I just don't know what else to tell you but that i absolutely loved it! Great Job!
~Slytherinchica08~Author's Response: How lovely of you to review this for me! And Run comes highly recommended, of course -- there is a reason it's so popular, after all. :) It's drawn a lot of Hunger Games comparisons, but it's really very different, and I'd totally take a look!
I'm so happy you enjoyed this! It was a bit of a challenge to write, but I really enjoyed it, and (as you might have been able to tell) the length got away from me just a bit. ;) Switching points of view like that, without separating sections with asterisks, is also something I've never really done before, but Sarah's a master at it. So the fact that you found that well-done is really encouraging as well!
You're so sweet; your reviews never fail to bring a smile to my face. ♥ I can't tell you what it means to me to have someone as supportive as you reading my stories! Thank you! Report Review
Bear with me here, because even a day later I am still a jumbled mess. ♥
It is so, so bizarrely cool to see this stuff that used to just be ideas in my head on someone else's author page, and for everything to be exactly, and I mean EXACTLY the same as it was in the original novel. Claudius Ptolemy is the exact same character - everything he says, his attitude, his glancing at Cliodna for subtle direction - I just want to bowl you over with hugs because of your attention to detail. You included bits about Grotta people and the newspaper having a field day about Amos, Portia, and Cedric's brief return, and you have no idea how many times I squeed when I saw something I recognized. I am going to reread this story about a hundred times today.
The setting and task of the round itself was sdkfjksfkd. Phenomenal. The mirrors shimmering and then reflecting certain places in Cliodna's Clock - I would pay cash to see all of them going at it in Odo's Pub! And then when you had the countdown, and the sentences between them, I think I died right then and there. I died. I'm dead.
I love how Cedric eyed the pool and was suspicious of it looking like it was too easy, and Severus thinking it was going to be a cinch because his competition was younger and not his genius self. Seeing their different thoughts on the task was very interesting. And then everything quickly became horrifying when it turned out that the Inferi had familiar faces.
Severus seemed to be able to compartmentalize his revulsion a lot better than Cedric, probably because Severus had been around Dark magic almost all of his life and was semi-used to it. The way he regarded his father and Avery contrasted sharply with how Cedric regarded Cho and Amos. But even still, Cedric managed to pull himself out of it, Champion that he is, and kept going. I had so much admiration for him, watching him repeatedly remind himself that they weren't real, they couldn't really be Inferi. ♥ Poor Cedric.
The descriptions of the Inferi themselves was equally awesome and horrifying. Pearl-like, luminescent eyes. Lank hair. Ermehgerd I love that imagery. They were so relentless, pulling at them and saying their names and skdfjkdjf. The ultimate obstacle. I think I probs would have drowned if it were me.
"Your eyes, Lily," he whispered. He reached out a hand towards the Inferius. "What have they done to your eyes?"
Across the water, Cedric's vision was swimming; he shook his head slightly, trying to clear the lights from the edge; they still clustered there, lingering from the hard blow he'd taken to the head.
Everything about all the lights and stars swimming on the edge of Cedric's focus was lovely/scary. I found myself getting tunnel vision while reading about it, and could actually, literally see stars on my periphery. That's how freaking good the writing was.
I LOVE, love, looove Severus's line to Lily about her eyes. I could hear and visualize it exactly in my head, and it was such a Severus thing to say - very hard-hitting, but in essence so simple. It's like, everything Severus says is always so poetic. The way that he arranges his sentences, it's intimidating. But when everything comes down to it and he's in a situation where his emotions are dominant, all of that seems to fall away and he talks like that, and it's shockingly understated, vulnerable. Even in just one little line. I'm not making any sense. Blah. Well, it makes sense in my head, but ANYWAY, BRILLIANT JOB. ~
The word that they had to read aloud, omg. You are so cruel. But it was perfect, ofc. "Victory". I could see Cedric as he read that, and the sardonic, bitter little smile it might have given him.
The way you handled what happened afterwards was sdfksjfdjfdfj. I have run out of words to convey how awesome everything is, so I just resort to keyboardsmash. There was a clear and distinct separation of air between Severus and everyone else. His entire being just radiates the desperate wish to be left alone, to be gone and for it all to be over, and it made me so sad for him. The second you said he had already made his choice, and Cedric won, I was just sitting here like WHAT. NO. SEVERUS, MOVE. But then it explained the reason why he was participating in the tournament at all. It's the only way you can die in Cliodna's Clock, and he wanted to be on the train out of there. So, so heartbreaking. :( But at the same time, it would have been even worse for Cedric to die, and Cedric had more he could do with his 24 hours than Severus. Severus literally has no one on earth he would want to visit.
Ptolemy's confusion about Severus not wanting his last 24 hours before the Vanishing, and Severus's clipped retort that he had no goodbyes to make, killed me. D: You have to stop writing things that make me curl up into a ball of feels, except never stop doing that because you're one of the rare authors who actually makes me feel any feels at all, and you always make me want to jump into stories and save them or boss them around or make them tell each other things.
I already told you this, but I love the part where Severus is relieved that her eyes are green again, purely because of the simplicity of that last thought, and how he let such a last thought be his last thought, and how realistic it would be that that would be the sort of thing you'd think about in your last moment. Something ordinary but personally important, and I'm rambling again.
I want to talk more about Cedric calling him Professor and Amos not being sure he could congratulate his son and the parallel realities and the interference and your very last line about how James was the second man to fall in love with Lily's eyes, but I believe that I am running out of characters. D: I LOVED THIS SO MUCH AND I LOVE YOU AND THIS IS HANDS-DOWN THE BEST PRESENT EVER. SKFJSDJ. ♥ ♥ ♥ Sooo lucky to have you as such a wonderful friend.Author's Response: It is a special form of torture to haul myself, at eight-thirty in the morning, to government lecture and have THIS be the first in my pile of unanswered reviews. I just. How do. ♥
First off, I've just got to say that I am SO, SO, SO glad that you liked this, because I don't think you want to hear again just how mega-intimidating it was to write something Run-centric. I loved the challenge, and I loved writing it, but every other paragraph I was like, "Is this right?" "Does this sound like Run?" "Oh, she's going to hate this." Ad infinitum. Your opinion is, ofc, one of the ones I care about the most, and on something based off of something YOU wrote it is invaluable. I can appreciate tenfold just how much time and care you put into that story, because I knew, and know even better now, how carefully you had to balance everything to do what you did. Still in so much admiration of you.
Severus's line about Lily's eyes is one of my very favorites in this story. ♥ He was... different to write here then I've written elsewhere, which is weird. But getting to write Snape and Cedric in one story is a joy I haven't had in years. :D I am literally at a loss for words. It's too early in the morning for this. PLEASE BEAR WITH ME AS I BLUNDER THROUGH.
I think it kind of killed a bit of my soul to put Severus through this -- but at the same time, I have to fully agree with you in that it was what he wanted. There was nothing left for him to live for, even in the afterlife. And that's one of the things that strikes me most about his character in your story, one of the reasons my heart always went out to him: He got no reprieve in death. He lived his whole life in the memory of the woman he loved, but who never loved him. (That's a dagger in the heart, that is, you cruel woman.) Blinking into nothingness is the only way he finally got to escape Lily, and there's something in that, even if it hurts the hearts of the readers behind the screen.
I can't even process this. This is one of the most fantastic reviews I've ever gotten, and wouldn't you know that you wrote all the others, too. ♥ I'll say it again -- so, so glad you liked this so much, and I'm honored to have written it for you this Christmas. :3 THANK YOU FOR SUCH A FABULOUS REVIEW. SRS. YOU ARE AMAZING. Report Review
Oh, wow. I've been so addicted to Run this makes me want to go straight back and read it again - which I'll probably do, you know, soon.
Obviously, your Severus was perfect, though I prefer him in ITB and ITR. But anyway. He was perfect here, and I CAN NOT BELIEVE YOU DID THIS TO HIM (and me, on a side note).
However, it's not surprising, and it makes him more canon-like to me, a bit cold and wanting to shield himself from emotions.
See that blob of feels lying in the corner, trying to be coherent? Yeah. That's me.
This was perfect, again. Is there anything you can't write? Anything? For the sanity of poor mortals over here?
10/10 (of course).
&heartsAuthor's Response: 'Run' should be re-read always; isn't it such a fantastic story? I'm forever jealous of Sarah with coming up with the idea for it, and it's no question as to why it became so popular.
I'm so glad you enjoyed this story! When Sarah and I decided what sorts of stories we were going to exchange, I was very, very nervous about it. Your response really makes me feel like I accomplished what I sought to. :) I didn't mean to make you a blob of feels, though! Poor Val. ♥ It sort of killed me doing this to Severus, but it would have destroyed me doing it to Cedric, too. Catch-22, I tell you.
... I am unsure how to respond to your last question, so I won't. :3 Seriously, though: Thank you so much for taking the time to review this for me! I'm so, so glad you did. And I'm very happy you liked it, too! Report Review
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