Ah.it's ok I guess :) but u can improve

Author's Response: Thanks a lot

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You have a great (and by great I mean AMAZING!) sense of humor but you may want to improve you're flow of words. Also, space your paragraphs; it's easier to read, and spend some more time clarifying incidents- like why Rose has that thing with sleeping. That will also make your chapters longer. Which brings me to another thing- Please make you're chapters longer! I'd love to see more of your funny moments and this chapter was too short!
Hoping to see more!

Author's Response: thanks a ton ill sure be remembring ur kind words


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Nice.i guess but u can defnately improve

Author's Response: Thanks a darn lot please dont give up on me ill definately improve

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.ok but I think u can improve .

Author's Response: Definately thanks :)

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Nice... So, forgive me, but I think i'm going to be a little harsh with my criticism. First and foremost, never, ever use sms language anywhere in the story... Unless, of course, you're writing about a phone conversation. It seems unprofessional and tacky. Secondly, spellings, darling. And thirdly, leave at least two lines gap between each para. Makes reading easier. I, however, have to appreciate your humor, it made me smile, so why don't you elaborate (i never really got why she hated sleeping :p) and bring us more of this fun stuff?

Best of luck with this story.
-Akansha.

Author's Response: Thanks ill keep your points in mind

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It was WAY to short bt sortta funny and nice too . U r a good author and can do better if u work a bit more

Author's Response: Thanks alia I sure will improve and its nice tat u find me a good author


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