Oh, ooh. You've probably already heard this before, but you have stunning prose. I don't even ship Dominique/Scorpius, and yet this story is drawing me towards them. A lovely start to what I'm sure is to be an amazing piece of work!Author's Response: Hi there! Thank you so much for reviewing :) I'm really happy you liked this! This kind of played through my mind during a storm one night and I finished it in one go. I'm really pleased that you liked it, so thank you for reviewing! This really means lot. Report Review
this is so good! I can't wait to read the rest of it :)Author's Response: Yay! Thank you so much! :) It'll come soon, hopefully. Thank youuu. Report Review
How does this have NO reviews? It's a travesty.
OK, well, first off, I don't know how coherent the following is going to be. As a writer (and a reader, I guess), I get extraordinarily excited when there's good writing and good craft, and this was just absolutely gorgeous. So.
I think you're the master of interrupter sentences. I'm sure there's an actual word for them, but I don't know what it is. They're the little phrases, single phrases, between paragraphs that sort of break up the flow. Yours are marvelous. Sometimes they annoy me in other works because they're jolting, but I love the way you've executed them here. They leave the perfect, single pause between long paragraphs.
And your word choice! I could go on for a long time about your word choice. All your verbs are fresh and unique, and I just love the way you craft your sentences. This line, for whatever reason, was one of my favorites: "... yet she can feel the ghost of her playing in the corners." It would have been so easy for you to say, "the ghost hung around" or any variation of that, and yet here you've said something unique and original, and I love it. It's like a breath of fresh air.
The premise is great, and you haven't approached grief like this melodramatic thing, which I also love. Nobody is collapsed on the floor and sobbing, or anything, which is fantastic. I think too often authors talk about grief like it's this huge... I dunno. It's just not always believable. Yours is very believable, so kudos.
xx RinAuthor's Response: Hello dear! :) I love your reviews; they always make me smile. I am so, so pleased that you liked this. It kind of just hit me during a storm and I basically finished it in one go. And yeah, reviews have been sparse and far in between lately... Slightly sad, but I suppose 9 favourites is as good a sign as any. I love my one-liners. I've attended no writing-classes or anything, so I don't have any idea of what I'm doing - I basically just write what I feel like. Thank you so much for reviewing, this really means a lot. I get so insecure with my writing (as all writers do) and I've just had a month of absence from writing, just trying to figure it all out, but I thinkkk I'm on track again. Thank you so much for your wonderful, wonderful review, dear.
xx Report Review
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