Reading Reviews for Scattered Moonlight
  
6 Reviews Found

Review #1, by BookDinosaur Scattered Moonlight

5th December 2013:
Hi Mike! How are you? :D I really liked this! Normally I don't really read much about werewolves, but I'm so glad I decided to stop over here! because I loved this.

You really introduced me to another side of Fenrir here. How he has to go through the pain, suffering alone, was just so sad and so touching. I loved how you described his transformation in this - I always thought that they would just get used to it, seeing as they go through it so often (I mean, once a month is pretty often to me) but I understand how he felt as he transformed. The way you described the transformation was really chilling and touching, I loved reading it. I also really liked how you say that he was fully experiencing everything, but that he wasn't in control at all. I've read so many stories where the werewolf was completely in control and the human couldn't remember a thing, which I'mve always thought as unrealistic. But how you described Fenrir as not being in control, the agony he was going through... Fenrir deserves a hug!

Also, I think that throughout the story, you really utilised the italicised flashback things. I loved it, especially towards the end where you used them so well to reveal the way that he was bitten with the way he bit the child. I thought that was really creative, and you definitely utilised that as much as you could. Because of all the flashback-things, anything I tried would probably come out awfully stilted and chunky, but your story just seemed to flow really well, which is amazing and I admire you so much for that.

The CC I would give you, if any, was that I think you should bring the two sides of Fenrir together some more? I mean, in the HP series, we see a whole side of him that's vicious and awful and likes to bite people, and in this story you introduced a whole new side to him. Not that that's bad, it's just that personally I would like to be able to see some of the Fenrir form the HP series in here, if that makes sense.

Anyway, overall this was an amazing one-shot, you managed to pack so much punch into a really small number of words, which is another thing I admire you for. See you around!

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Review #2, by alicia and anne Scattered Moonlight

30th December 2012:
Here I am with your second secret santa gift! :D

First of all wow! That part at the end where you had Greyback's memories of being bitten mixed with those of what I can only assume as maybe Remus, or another small child being bitten by him was amazing. I loved that the same thing happened, only this time he was the 'monster', absolutely brilliant!
You've written this so well, I hadn't really thought about what the human part of them goes through when the monster takes over them and now I do. This is so brilliant, you've really done such a fantastic job on this.

Love your not so secret secret Santa :D

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Review #3, by TheHeirOfSlytherin Scattered Moonlight

23rd October 2012:
So, while we're talking, I decided to click on your page, and I saw this about Fenrir, and we're talking about Fenrir, so I decided to read it. Yay!

So, the more I read your Fenrir stories, the more I love him as a character. Because you don't write about the Fenrir we all know, you write him before that, the why and the how.

I never thought of him as someone who'd hate it in the beginning, because of who he is in Harry's time, but being a werewolf is not a constant thing, in that you only turn once a month, and it makes sense to hate it at first (like Hugo on CFtM). I'd imagine that Fenrir would be the same in the beginning, and you've totally made me see that now.

So much emotion; I felt so sorry and sad for Fenrir. And the boy at the end. I loved the mix of present (kind of) and memory, it flowed really well, you made it work.

Who was the man? I'm curious, but I liked him. Despite his anger in the beginning, he showed he cared, especially when he cried.

This was amazing, Mike.

Sam.

(P.S. Yay for receiving my 500th review. :D)

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Review #4, by HPPC Staff Scattered Moonlight

8th September 2012:
Hi Mike! Here with another of your reviews!

I absolutely loved this! Fenrir is one of the characters that I have always hated, but I just felt so sorry for him whilst reading that. You threw so much emotion into it that really showed another side to him; a side I want to hug.

I always assumed that werewolves would get used to the transformation just as you get used to pain the more it is there, but you really made me believe that I have been wrong all this time. It is only once a month that it happens, so it's nowhere near often enough to become accustomed to it.

The way you described the pain was so sad yet so beautiful. It really made me see just how painful it was and, again, it made me want to hug him and tell him it will all be okay.

The way you switched between the memory and the current situation worked so well and it flowed beautifully. Having him know where he is, but completely out of control of himself was another thing I never realised. It was like he was in a suit and someone else had the controls. In my head, I had imagined it to just be like swapping them for another person, but the way you wrote it made the whole process seem so much more saddening to me.

I'm still confused as to who the man is. At first, I thought he was some kind of doctor, but then towards the end you showed him crying and Fenrir sitting on his lap, making me think it was his dad, but then that doesn't fit with his first line where he calls Fenrir 'Greyback'.

Two small mistakes I did notice were this: '"Hey, cheer up," he looked down at me with a smile; his usual anger was gone, replaced with something I didn't understand.' It's probably me being picky, but I would have ended the speech with a full stop (period) and then started the rest as a new sentence.
And this: 'The vision twisted at this point and his eyes shined at he growled at me.' I think the second 'at' should be 'as'.

I've mentioned the switching between the memory and the current situation already, but I just want to say that I love how you did it at the end. Even though it was only a small sentence each before swapping, it still flowed beautifully and I loved how you related the two situations so well! It was a really nice effect!

Again, I loved this! Great job with it!!

-The HPPC Staff

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Review #5, by Wistful Scattered Moonlight

16th August 2012:
Miiikkke.
*actually reviews this time*

Nice job ^^
Really well-written

Author's Response: Thank for reviewing! :D

Mike.


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Review #6, by Levana Scattered Moonlight

16th August 2012:
Hey Mike!

This story is awesome! I love how you have the memory throughout the entire story. The memory made me feel bad for Greyback and I don't like him that much :p so good job with that!!

I love how you got this plunnie by flooding the bathroom since there isn't a connection between them :p (that I can see anyway). Awesome job Mike!!

~Maggie

Author's Response: Hey Maggie!

Aha thanks! I'm glad you liked that the memory thing! FEEL BAD FOR GREYBACK! :D

I love how I got it too xD

THANK YOUUU MAGGIE :D

Mike.


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