Reading Reviews for Bachelor of Science
7 Reviews Found

Review #1, by AlexFan { TWO }

2nd December 2013:
I forgot to clarify this in my last review but when I say that Scorpius has to be careful around Sophie, I mean that if he ticks her off, Hengist might just beat him to a pulp.

Scorpius and Albus are less like Sherlock and John than I thought. Albus is a bit odder than John by the sounds of that beard and Scorpius doesn't seem as socially inept as I thought he was!

I love how Scorpius and Al have barely even begun to get to know Sophie and they've already made themselves at home in her house and are going around stealing from people with her. That's when you know that you've got a realt friendship right there.

And my absolute favourite bit was

It smells of adventure, said Sophie, inhaling deeply and rubbing her palms over her hands.

It smells of Azkaban, muttered Scorpius, who had pulled out a piece of paper from his cloak and had begun writing down his will.

As you can see, there are two types of people in the world.

Author's Response: Hahaha @ your third paragraph. YES ALL THE WAY. It is in The Essentials of Friendship, a compilation by Sophie Lovegood and Honorary Lovegood Hengist. Thank you so much for the review, darling xoxo

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Review #2, by AlexFan { ONE }

1st December 2013:
I knew this was going to be awesome! I just knew it! I seem to be going on a reading-stories-about-inventors phase.

My favourite is definitely Scorpius because he's so grumpy and anti-social. Albus is just the babysitter that's there to make sure that Scorpius doesn't blow anyone up and for the occasional show.

They actually remind me of Sherlock and Watson to be perfectly honest. Albus and Scorpius are exactly like Sherlock and John. Scorpius is the anti-social genius that doesn't know when he's gone too far, thinks he's the best and looks down on everyone. Albus is the one who's been around him so long that he just doesn't question Scorpius anymore.

And oh my God, Ginny was pure gold. The sass and sarcasm coming from her was just so hilarious, she sounds exactly like book Ginny. And Sophie keeps some very questionable company around by the looks of it, Scorpius should be a little more careful around her.

Author's Response: Wooow thank you so much ;D By Sherlock and Watson I hope you mean canon or even Elementary Sherlock and Watson because that would be Number One on the list of Ultimate Compliments.

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Review #3, by rogovjm { TWO }

16th September 2012:
Argh! Cliffhangers! Well anyway, this was great! So Sophie is Luna's niece. That explains a lot. The reason behind why Sophie is out for the werewolf bite and what happened to her dad was all very well written so nice job! The description of the potion was also really cool and even though the cliffhanger was majorly annoying, it makes me want to read on. So keep writing and i can't wait for chapter three!


Author's Response: Hello! I'm glad the backstory made a bit of sense. It was properly planned out for a change XD Omg sorry, I didn't realize it was much of a cliffhanger really. BUT I'M GLAD YOU'RE SO INTO THE STORY! I will try and update as soon as I can! Thank you so much (:

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Review #4, by argetlam shadeslayer { ONE }

6th September 2012:

Alright, so let me preface this with yet another fangirly gem of mine. (Your stories and graphics just inspire fangirly gem after fangirly gem.) Prior to reading this, I glimpsed that it was your fic and already knew that it was going to be just spectacular. (And I was right!) Seriously, I'm just a huge fan of anything that comes out of your lovely brain in general. Anyway, right off the bat, I was psyched to read this.

And then you opened with slightly mad, befogged Scorpius and precious (yes, he's just precious), logical Albus, and I was hooked. Like a fish. Or a pirate. Or various other things that are hooked.

"Scorpius chose not to say anything rude to his (only) friend, on the grounds that he was, after all his (only) friend." I feel like that really sums up the bromance of Scorbus, but in a kind of sweet, sincere, no-nonsense sticking-together way. I absolutely love the way you've characterized both of them, and I know I'll be shipping this Riders of Brohan thing they've got going till the end of time.

As for Sophie, you had me at "I couldn't help but over-hear your conversation with my Extendable Ears." YES. Just in so many ways, yes. She is perfect.

And Hengist?! I don't really even know how Hengist came to be, but I want him around. Moar Hengist, plz. Just his name alone inspires awe-inspired giggles. For some reason, I find myself picturing Shan Yu from Mulan or that ruffian with the hook from Tangled every time I read Hengist's name. I dunno, I'm not sure what purpose he serves, but he seems legit and quite cool, and I would love to see more of him. Wow, that turned into a bit more of a tangent than I was intending.

Anyway, all of this is to ultimately say that I would love you long time like Fergie if you updated, because this story is utterly brilliant.

Author's Response: Em you're kind of my fave and I basically just always want to hug you but I never can.

'Seriously, I'm just a huge fan of anything that comes out of your lovely brain in general.' I WORRY FOR YOU. *ahem* thank you? I don't even know how to reply to that but now I just feel massively pressurized because Em reads and likes my stuff you guys. THANKS FOR THAT EM.

'Or various other things that are hooked' Let me love you? You are more precious than Scorpius.

RIDERS OF BROHAN omg I am on the floor laughing so hard Em why do you do this. I ship them terribly hard too, and it's also why I even wanted to write this stupid story but oh well. Will have to put bromance on the back burner till I can get some plot going ;c

Since you asked and made such brilliant references, THERE WILL BE MORE HENGIST. And I definitely will try to update as soon as humanly possible at this point. Thank you so much Em seriously I heart you big time ♥♥♥

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Review #5, by peppersweet { ONE }

25th August 2012:

p.s Albus/Scorpius is my BROTP. bros forever.

Hrnghmo, yes, yes, my thoughts exactly.

Scorpius will die an old man filled with regret = Scorpius is Dominic Cobb CHECK THE TOTEM (sudden crazy next gen inception AU invading my mind, oh god Meghna all I asked for was ONE QUIET SATURDAY NIGHT IN but nooo)

Scorpius chose not to say anything rude to his (only) friend, on the grounds that he was, after all his (only) friend. - let me love them

on a serious note, I love this Scorpius. he is cray cray like a crayish and smart.

"There's nothing he knows that I don't already know," he said haughtily, flicking the hair out of his eyes and strongly resembling the pompous...his mother had raised him to be. - HA. I love this!

Uncle Ringo. Uncle Ringo. again...let me love this.

Ginny said slowly, wondering which of her choicest swear words to pick out of her arsenal. - this is a PURRFECT little snippet of Ginny characterisation my friend.

Scorpius and Albus on a broom together. BROTP.

"I believe Death Eaters are extinct," the older one said slowly. / "That's what they want you to believe." - omg brb dying

ohwowowow that was a killer first chapter. I noticed a few grammar mistakes - not many - mostly confused tenses and a couple of run-on sentences, but not so much that it distracted me from reading. but omg I love this so much ♥

this story is officially worthy of tom hardy's beard.



Hahaha yes 99.999% of the reasons why I wanted to write this was SCORBUS. And I can't help but let them ride broomsticks and stuff together because that's what wizards in love do. OMG INCEPTION AU /LET'S DO IT/ not what I had in mind but if you ever write something of the sort I better be the first to know kthnx.

Yes about Scorpius. He is all kinds of cray and not of the good sort. I had to let a little bit of the slick Malfoy-ness seep in in a couple of places, to make him seem more real. Didn't want everyone going "gurl he is a Malfoy not a possum why did you write him like that?"

UNCLE RINGO MAY OR MAY NOT BE IMPORTANT TO THE PLOT *evil laughter* wait, plot? what plot lol. He's not important-important but he's special and has a mention in the next chapter c:

@ Ginny's characterisation -- really? I thought it was awful lol good to know then! I'm glad it was okay. She just had two and a half lines and a couple of glares so eh I couldn't do much.

I AM SO GLAD YOU LIKED IT as you can see, it's taken me a good amount of time and feels to properly reply to this. Look at what you do to me.

Tom Hardy's beard what get out stop promising me things I will never own!

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Review #6, by Cherry Bear { ONE }

23rd August 2012:
Hey there! First of all, can I just say that I love your characters here? They're all so amusing and quirky and different from the Next-Gen characters I'm used to reading. I love that your Scorpius is a mad scientist and antisocial and awkward and kind of a selfish best friend. And I love that Albus puts up with all of his madness and their bromance in general, although I do hope that Scorpius learns not to be so selfish in their friendship.

Also, I love how weird and random and unexpected Sophie is. For some reason her interactions with the boys and the half-giant reminded me of a little girl playing with dolls. She's adorable but she also seems a little bit mischievous, like she's manipulating the situation to her liking. Her character definitely intrigues me and I'm excited to see more of her.

I like the story you've started here, too; I don't think I've ever read anything about a search for a werewolf bite cure. I feel like very few Harry Potter fanfictions even touch upon science, since science and magic don't exactly go hand-in-hand, so I really appreciate that you're doing that here. I can't imagine it's very easy, but it's definitely interesting to read about. I guess even magic involves science, like with the discovery of new potions and cures and whatnot. And you did a good job of getting me invested in the story, because now I'm hoping that they actually will figure out the cure now that they know the unicorn blood thing. Although I am a little worried that it's not all perfect yet and there's something else they'll need to figure out...or else why hasn't Sophie discovered the cure on her own, yet?

There were a few nit-picky grammar things that I noticed. For example:
- Some of your sentences seem to drag on a little bit, such as: "Opposite him, hunched over a large wooden table littered with numerous cauldrons and pots of different shapes and sizes, some spewing and spluttering dubious smells and fumes, there was seated one particularly dishevelled looking Scorpius Malfoy, with his head bent down, keenly examining a dubious looking plant." It's not exactly a run-on, but it's a little tedious to read and maybe it'd be better to split into two sentences or get rid of some of those phrases? Also, I think disheveled only has one 'l' in it. I hope my criticism doesn't offend you, because it is absolutely your prerogative as a writer to write sentences however you want (:
- In the sentence, "'That's it!' abandoning the Quaffle, Albus stood up with a determined face (a rarity, for him) and walked over to his heavily caffeinated friend," 'abandoning' should actually be capitalized, since it's a separate sentence from the dialogue preceding it.
- In the sentence, "'I supposing scoring all those O's in Herbology isn't doing you much good now, is it?' said Albus with a snort," I think "supposing" should be "suppose", or you need an "am" in between "I" and "supposing" for it to make sense.
- In the sentence, "He held her hand out, first to Scorpius who ignored it, before holding it out to Albus, who shook it cautiously," I think you meant "she" instead of "he".
I don't know how well I'm explaining these things, but there are some really great guides in the Grammar Guidelines section of the forum if you're confused. I would recommend getting a beta, if possible - it's always great to have a second set of eyes to read over things, for content as well as grammar.

I can't really think of anything else to comment on or to critique. I thought this was a very enjoyable read, from Scorpius' lack of social skills to Albus' weary patience to Sophie's ability to do whatever she wants without any consideration for what's socially acceptable. I'm excited to see you incorporate the quote from the challenge into this and find out who will be saying it. I'm also excited to see what effect Sophie will have on Scorpius; I'm hoping she'll change his character for the better.

Looking forward to the next chapter! (:
Cherry Bear

Author's Response: Seriously can I ask someone for help on how to reply to this because I don't know where to start.

1) Thank you for pointing out the grammar issues! I really need to find a beta. I keep forgetting to get around doing it, and normally I just wing it, but obviously I overlooked a lot of goofs in this one -- so thank you! Will edit in the changes soon~

2) I'm surprised people like Sophie ;D She is based almost entirely on Jess Day and Luna Lovegood, and most people do not like the crazy pixie girl trope that the former is famous for. But she is precious to me and I am sooo glad you like her character!

3) I'm already running out of things to say. It means so much that you took the time off to write such a detailed, helpful critique! I know I missed the deadline for the challenge, but I am very keen on updating this soon -- or as soon as RL will permit. Thank you so much, once again!

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Review #7, by rogovjm { ONE }

7th August 2012:
I love this depiction of Scorpius. I've always seen versions of him that are nicer and more normal and less of what you would expect out of a Malfoy. He isn't evil like how he is sometimes described but you found a nice medium for him. He's still haughty and rude but he's a really cool character.

Albus also reminds me a bit of Harry in the way that he seems more relaxed (of course I mean the Harry before the whole Horcrux hunt) and when his mom is on the verge of murdering Scorpius, he just leads her back to bed.

You said that Sophie was related to Luna but I was wondering how. She only had two sons named Lysander and Lorcan and no brothers or sisters so she couldn't have been her neice. Did you just make her up as Luna's daughter or something else?


*ahem* yes I wanted to write Scorpius a bit differently from the smarmy creep everyone writes him as lol. Just because he's a Malfoy he doesn't have to come with cooties, right? Haha thank you soo much I'm glad you like this character!

Albus is kind of my fave, ngl. I never made the connection to Harry but perhaps, since you said so, there is something similar! He's just there to make sure everyone stays sane (which is not what Harry did lol) and happy and sleeps on time.

No she's not her daughter :) I will reveal more about Sophie's background in the next chapter! Keep your eyes peeled. I really really appreciate you reviewing this c:

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