Hello! I'm True Author with your requested review! =]
Hey, you seem to be really worried about your story from the request, but don't worry. You can definitely continue it. =]
First of all, I loved your idea. I seriously never thought that Potters and Weaseleys will be heroes and Malfoys, Knotts, Goyles will be neglected people, so I think you have a very original plot idea and it's absolutely believable. Other thing I liked was how Jade is trying to sound bad. She's actually a lovable person, but she never shows her softer side to anyone.
Still, you have to work on this a little bit. I'll suggest you to format this again. The spaces always ruin the story so copy- paste the whole thing in MS word and try to fix the formatting errors.
There are some parts which are not believable like Rose's characterization. She thinks Jade has no discipline and Jade thinks Rose is a bit bossy am I right? So, if things are like this, Rose'll never go and rearrange Jade's trunk and I don't think Jade'll accept it. so you better not write that. =] Other one is, you mentioned that Jade shut the curtains before she plugged her headphones didn't you? Thenhow on earth did she know that Rose shot her an icy look? =]
As for the genre, I currently didn't see any romance or humor. I don't know where it goes so, =]
Anyways, just fix those errors. Otherwise, you have a definitely original and interesting plot so keep writing! :DAuthor's Response: Thank you :) A million, zillion thank you's :) I go fix them :) Report Review
Alright. Rose needs to freaking love Scorpius right freaking now. Jade is perfect and I cried when I found out she couldn't be with Louis because they are perfect. And Oh My Godric I love this story! But seriously. OPEN YOUR EYES ROSE!Author's Response: Her eyes will be opened preeety soon.heeheeehee spoiler alert :P And I know! Jade and Louis were soo perfect together, but Gabrielle Delacour kinda fit the description for Jade's mom, and look on the bright side! Their cousins now! :) Report Review
Hurry up and write another chapter!! I couldn't stop reading lol, very good :)Author's Response: Thank you :) Never fear! The next chapter should be up sometime this week :) Thanks for reading :) Report Review
I think the mystery guy is either Hugo or Albus. :) her not being with Fred kinda broke my heart. Give him a happy ending too, yeah? :) love the story, update soon!Author's Response: How could I not give Freddie a happy ending :P Don't worry, it will happen :P I am currently sitting at my computer trying to overcome my major writers block, but don't worry! Update will be soon!!! Report Review
I'm kinda hoping the mystery person is one of James' mates.
Otherwise, good story.Author's Response: Thank you :D A million zillion thank you's for reading AND reviewing :D Report Review
I WANNA KNOW WHO THE MYSTERY PERSON IS!Author's Response: YOU WILL SOON I PROMISE :) Report Review
I have loved reading your story tonight! Looking forward to the next chapter update.Author's Response: Next chapter should (hopefully) be up sometime this week :) Report Review
I love this!Jade and Al are adorable!It's gonna be crazy when the Wotters and the Lads find out though!Yikes!I can't wait for the next chapter,update soon please!Author's Response: Hey :) I have an idea for the next chapter, so I'll be writing that today/tomorrow, and then updating when my one-shot is validated :) I know! The Wotters and The Lads are going to go CRAZY when they find out, but it might not be in the way you think! I've planned a sequel for this, so get ready for plenty more drama in the chapters ahead :P Report Review
Great Chapter! I was wondering, which pratronus was Jade's? Was it the sheep dog? Oh, hang on! A ram's male so of course hers was the sheep dog!
Anyway, Great Chapter! I still think it's Albus!
WildCatAuthor's Response: Ya, her patronus is a sheep-dog :) its my fav animal :) Thank you so much! I've entered a bunch of challenges so I'm not sure when the next chappie will b out :D soon I hope! Report Review
So, I had to come back and write my review on this chapter! It's definately Al! The navy boxers were the clue weren't they! Also, at the party in the Gryffindor Common Room doesn't mention Al! And I've decided James and Jade would not be good together! It's just to obvious! I don't think she should end up with Fred either, cause they are just not right!
Please keep writing!
WildCatAuthor's Response: Don't worry, I've got a sketchy lay-out for the next chapter. I promise I'll write it sometime before the end of the week! Report Review
Hey again again again,
I'm going to have to stop writing that eventually! So, I thought the mystery person was Albus, but I'm not sure!
Please keep writing more chapters soon!
WildCatAuthor's Response: Maybe, mebbe not :P Report Review
Hey again again,
So, I have already given you my oppinion on who Jade should be with, but I was thinking! Is the mystery person Albus?
WildCatAuthor's Response: Well, I don't want to give away anything too soon, so you'll just have to keep reading :P THANK YOU FOR REVIEWING :D It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy :) Report Review
Really good chapter! Louis is really funny! So, the Marauders win the match! I don't like James very much, since last chapter especially, but I still think he and Jade should get together! Or Jade should be with Louis!
Hope you don't mind me saying that!
WildCatAuthor's Response: I love Louis! Like, so much :) Report Review
I like your story alot! You say you don't know who Jade should be with? I was thinking it could be James or Albus Potter! I know they hate eachother, that's why it wouldmake a good twist! However, you may have already picked someone!
Again, I like your story. Jade's tough, specially when James is being sexist!
WildCatAuthor's Response: Thank you for reviewing :D Report Review
I love the twist with Louis! That's gotta make for one hell of an awkward conversation between them! I am dying to find out who the mystery person is. I feel like because of the quote "emotional range of a teaspoon" and knowing Louis's family tree so well, it's a Weasley, but I can't work out who!
And I'll admit, I still have hope for her and Fred. Just that this is you making it more interesting, and less simple. Adding a bit of drama to their journey and all.Author's Response: The twist just kind of popped out of thin air and I was like 'that'll work!'. I'll be revealing the mystery persons identity a little more each chapter (knowing me, I'll probably accidentally give it away in the next chapter!) Thank you so much for reviewing and keep reading :) Report Review
its James isnt it??? please tell me its james!! and to be perfectly honest with you i wish they didnt have sex but oh well...
10/10 of course!! :) xxAuthor's Response: Thank you! The reason behind them having sex is Jade isn't one of those sweet innocent girls, she's firey and passionate, and she gets carried away in the heat of the moment. She does regret it though, the morning after! I'm really sorry, but its not James :( Its someone like James though :) Will that do? Report Review
I am so sad hat it is not FRED! I know that you will make smething just as good thouAuthor's Response: I know, loads of people love Fred, but it just didn't feel right :) Report Review
I'm pretty sure it's Al because of the emotional range of a teaspoon bit (only hermione says that) and the fact that he was the only one not being described in the last chapter why Al Potter??? I like Louis... :( but, doesn't that mean they're related coz Louis is her cousin? But i love the story so far!Author's Response: Thank you :D and yes, its Al! :D I have a slight (meaning major) obsession with him :) I know! I love Louis too! But I just needed something really dramatic to happen, and Louis ended up mixed up in it :( broke my heart to do it! Report Review
great story ! love itttAuthor's Response: Thank you :D Report Review
JAMES :D ok there are so much stories about james but.. :D fregal would great to anyway :DAuthor's Response: Thank you for reviewing :) Fergal really is a sweet, sweet guy, but I have something MAJOR planned for him :D Time will tell, because I'm planning on doing a sequel to this :D Report Review
I think it's Al Potter because of the navy boxers. Love the story so far. Update soon!
-FawkesAuthor's Response: BINGO! I think I may have been a tad obvious, but who cares, I'm no good at keeping secrets anyway :) Thank you so much for reading this! I'll update as soon as inspiration hits me, I'm taking this story in a whole new direction, I'll explain at a later stage, just keep reading :) Siriusly xxx Report Review
I have already told you who i think Fred but i kinda like Lois even though he seems friend at the miniut i think there can be something moreAuthor's Response: I really am on the fence with this one. Both Louis and Fred are really nice, and its going to be so hard to break one/both of their hearts (as I said, on the fence) Thank you for reading and reviewing :) Report Review
FRED! Ok, i may love her single, but Fred is working so hard to get her! And its James best mate, just think of the trouble that would cause! You NEED to put more up ASAP! There is a reason I don't read WIP... I am way too impatient. But for this, I'll learn, Because it is brilliant!Author's Response: A lot of people seem to want her to end up with Fred, and I don't disagree, they would be very good together, but would it not be too obvious? Just saying :) But there is no way on earth she is ending up with James! I promise you that! I actually have started a new story, have serious writers block for this one! But I shall persevere and get my act together, and try to update some time this week :) Please keep your eyes peeled! And maybe you could even try my new one 'The Year I Tried To Teach Albus Potter To Dance', extremely long title but c'est la vie, nothing else fitted :) Thank you thank you thank you, a million zillion thank yous for reviewing, it seriously means SO much to me! I am so grateful, you have no idea! It really gives me MOTIVATION :D *Queue inspirational music* THANKS AGAIN! Report Review
I am falling in love with Fred. You can keep Louis, I just want him as a best friend. And I loved the commentary. Very Lee Jordan. I'm actually happy they didn't win, it would have been a little cheesy. Brilliant writing!!! :)Author's Response: I tried to keep the commentary Lee Jordan-esque, but I wanted it to have some of Louis's personality too! And thank you! I thought it would have been very cheesy if they won too !! Report Review
Hahahah, I LOVE IT SO MUCH!!! I just adore Jade. But I don't see her with any of those guys. I just love her single and angry :DAuthor's Response: Thank you for leaving reviews :) I almost had heart failure when it said I had 5 reviews!!! You have no idea how much I love you right now :) Report Review
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