Ok where do i begin?
First off I love how you made Cho into a bitter person and i love how you have her question her choice in a husband. In the books she always seemed unsure of what she wanted and even who she wanted. and it's nice to see her carry that trait into adulthood.
Second: I enjoyed the comparisions she made between abra kadabra and avada kedavra and i never noticed how similar they are until i read this story.
Third: Even though it was written quickly as you mentioned, i feel that you did an excellent job with making sure the plot flowed and your characterization stayed spot-on. This was all around an excellent story and I have no complaints. In fact i would love to see a possible sequel/companion piece to this such as how she met her muggle husband..
Great Job!Author's Response: I don't think Cho's unsure of what or who she wanted, really; or at least she's no less uncertain of what she wants for herself (in canon) as any other teenager. I don't think she's unsure of her life in this fic, as much as she isn't at home anywhere. Again, that's not because of any indecision about where she belongs. The abra kadabra/avada kedavra similarity is one that I'm pretty sure is telegraphed in canon, so I can't quite take credit for that. And yay, I'm so glad it worked out even in the limited space and with the deadline. As I said elsewhere, I think it would be interesting to see more about Cho and Michael, it's not something I'm really interested in exploring further. But that's what stories are for, I think: setting things up and leaving blanks to be filled by the imagination or, in our case, fanfiction. Thanks for stopping by, and I'm glad you enjoyed it! Report Review
You're amazing, Gubby. A truly amazing writer. I say something like this every time, but it's true - I just love your writing and the way you tell stories. Cho's embittered voice is so well-developed that I can hear it speaking to me - it sounds so adult and frighteningly mature, the voice of the successful person who discovered too late that they missed something along the way, namely happiness. She tells herself that she should be happy, that she has a lot and has come a long way, but it's just not there - she doesn't have it in her. Is it the war? Is it Cedric's death? (I could do a whole reading about why she married a Muggle, but I'm trying to ramble less and review more. :P) Who knows, it doesn't actually matter. But it is brilliant how you got into her head like this.
From what I've read so far, the Ravenclaws have been the most creative when it comes to working in the prompts. Cho herself might as well be the smouldering dragon, bitter and grumpy. I love how you slipped the prompts between the lines, using them as explanations for the Muggle husband. The dragon's blood one was best, though, because the way you had Cho list them off brought out even more bitterness, verging on disgust for the world that, in a way betrayed her, giving her a taste of happiness before ripping it away again.
Okay, I'll stop now before I completely swoon away under the light of your brilliance. It's wonderful to see new stories from you - they're an extra-special treat to read, meant to enjoy slowly like an exquisite cup of specialty coffee to best savour the perfect flavour. That is how I see your stories, yes. ^_^Author's Response: Oh gawd .___. You know how I feel about getting praise I'm not worthy of! It's funny that you talk about Cho's voice being well-developed because I literally did not even think of writing for this challenge until about 80 minutes before the deadline. I wrote this in a little over an hour. I had no idea what I was doing. So it's really gratifying and humbling and embarrassing to hear any of this. BUT ANYWAY, Cho has the benefit of hindsight, and is bitter about having it. I think it's more about her /thinking/ she doesn't have it in her to be truly happy; I'm sure there's a universe where she could be, but that's not here and now.
(As for a reading about why she married a Muggle, I think it was to distance herself from Cedric, from Harry, from the war and the destruction she herself wrought. To be able to look down on them and reinforce to herself, "This world I escaped is and always has been the pits. How dare they discriminate against me and my husband I HATE YOU ALL YOU HORRID PEOPLE". Cough.)
I read very few of the challenge stories, sadly, with yours the only one from Hufflepuff, one other from Gryffindor, and a few Ravenclaws. I definitely did not think that Cho herself might be the dragon (argh I should have made that connection and worked in that last prompt!). And it's funny that the dragon blood one struck you as the best because I thought it was the least ~subtle one there. (Also yes, the world that 'in a way betrayed her'. Perfect phrasing.)
Ack stop it! My fragile ego can't take it! But honestly, thank you so much for such a lovely review. I don't write nearly as much as I used to, and I like even less of what I do churn out, so it's really great to hear that. Unworthy of it though I am. -hug- Report Review
Hello - just wanted to say that I really enjoyed your house-cup entry. I enjoyed your take on the grown-up Cho with her Muggle husband, and what her life must be like. Great job!Author's Response: Grown-up Cho seems so much more full of possibility than the Cho we see in canon, and I was excited to explore that. Thanks for the review! I'm glad you liked it. Report Review
I'm seriously starting to repeat myself (maybe starting isn't the right word :P ) in reviewing all these entries. But there's something I've got to say about your entry. First off, all the entries have similarities, obviously, since everyone is working with the same prompts. There's one part of my brain that, after reading a few in a row, is saying, "These stories all seem the same." Then there's the other part of my brain that is saying, "Wow, what a different take on the task! I haven't read that yet!"
So that's what my brain is saying right now regarding your story. I've read a few where Cho was in the future, but none that focused on her life with her Muggle husband this way. It was fun to read about him! He'd be a fun character to encounter in a longer story, I think.
I just realized it, but I think one reason your story suddenly stood out to me as different is that there wasn't some sort of dragon battle or symbolic dragon in it. Which is fine. It was a very enjoyable story (I enjoyed Michael more than a dragon anyway), and it's sort of refreshed me to keep pressing on with the rest!Author's Response: I totally understand that everything can tend to run together in your mind when you're reading so many fics structured around the same elements (I felt it too, and I read only a handful). It's the differences in approach that I loved seeing, so I'm really happy this stuck out!
I'm actually kind of surprised that there aren't a lot/any fics involving Cho and the Muggle JKR said she married, but it is, I suppose, an obscure path to venture down when there are dragons and such to incorporate too (... which is why I didn't have a dragon lol). Michael is a fun character, but I feel like Cho sees him sometimes in an immature light; he isn't childish or whatever on his own, but she sees little behaviors and categorizes him as such. Which could be interesting to explore in a longer fic, definitely, but to be honest, that's not something that interests me right now.
Anyway, so glad to see your review! I'm glad you enjoyed it, dragon-less though it was. Report Review
I really did enjoy this! It was a fantastic take on the prompt, and a really refreshing insight into the mind of Cho. I love that you didn't do the typical Cho-reflection-after-Cedric's-death, but chose instead a time after her marriage to a muggle - Michael. It is a really fresh perspective, one I haven't encountered yet, but the way you characterised Cho felt so, so realistic. It's so easy to believe that someone like Cho could be bitter about the adversity, maybe even more than how much she loves her husband.
Really brilliant writing - the feelings and thoughts felt so real, and you managed to tell the readers so much in not that many words. You also incorporated the prompts so seamlessly too. So all in all, I really liked your take on Cho as a wife long after her Hogwarts years - it really was a different and interesting angle. Great fic! :)
- MMAuthor's Response: Eee I'm glad you enjoyed it! I was, as the author's note mentioned, going for something a little different with the prompt. I hadn't read any of the entries before I began writing (I still haven't read many, cough), but I guessed Cedric would figure heavily into a lot of them. I don't know how probable this would be for a real Cho, but I'm glad it's realistic too, because that's another thing I wanted. (Also why I couldn't figure out how to fit in a dragon for realz.) So yay, thank you so much for stopping by, very happy you enjoyed it. Report Review
This was such a different take on the prompts--it was very refreshing to read, and I like how you portrayed Cho. My favorite line? "I'm a naive little girl veteran, and I am bitter about the adversity I've overcome and in love with it almost more than I love my clever little Muggle husband, but I'm not quite that mad." I feel like this just reveals a lot about Cho and how she feels about her lot in life, and I'm glad to say that I interpret her as content. Great job writing!Author's Response: Oh, thank you so much! I think Cho is bitter about a lot of things, her husband being one of those things, but content seems like a good word to apply for her. Thanks for the lovely review! Report Review
Hey there! It's DarkRose from the forums, here to review. :] First off: thanks for writing us a story over in Ravenclaw House! It was a challenge (I did it too), but I know the whole House appreciates all of our efforts. ;] So! Great story! This is one of the best ones I've read so far, actually! I really loved the tone of this piece. I think it was impressive that you could capture Cho's bitterness. You scorned the world she lives in, but can't escape, as it seems to me. I liked that she DOES love her husband, but I almost feel she would love her solitude and bitterness more. I think you did a great job showing that. The emotions throughout this really moved me. :] Terrific job working in the prompts in new and unique ways. Your idea puts mine to shame. ;] Again, well done, and let's hope we Ravenclaws pull a win in this challenge! :D
--EmilyAuthor's Response: Hi there! I'm not a big forums resident, but I'm happy to help Ravenclaw and compete and all that. And especially happy to hear that you liked it so much :3 You put it really well, that "she DOES love her husband, but I almost feel she would love her solitude and bitterness more" -- this is exactly the mood I was going for, when I realized where the fic was going. The fact that she does choose to love her husband more than the bitterness speaks highly of her, I think, which I suppose is one of the points of the challenge, to do something positive for your House's champion. I'm so flattered by all this praise and 100% sure I don't deserve it compared to all of the fabulous entries Ravenclaw has, yours included, I'm sure, but thank you for the feedback! Report Review
I loved this.
I don’t even really know why I loved it except I do. I’m going to ramble a little bit so that I can analyze my feelings more fully about it.
I guess I can start with this (it’s not the only specific line I loved but it was by far my favorite): I let him hold my wand sometimes, that little thing, and he waves it about and says things like “YOU – SHALL NOT – PASS!” - how gosh darn cute is that? ♥
This Cho I think rates up into my favorites of the way we present Cho. She’s scarred, she’s imperfect, she’s been in love and out of love a few times and now she’s got this adorable and clever Muggle husband who’s helping her through all of that. I loved that we got a glimpse of her life after the war, after her marriage to a Muggle and how that helped her through it all, is helping her through it. I guess that’s what I love about this :)
xCharAuthor's Response: Ohh, I'm so glad to hear that! Rambling is always good, in my book. Michael is adorable and perfect and all the sunshine Cho (should) need in her life, but whether she can accept it wholeheartedly is a different story to me. And eee, I'm so glad to hear that! I haven't read all of the entries, let alone all the ones from Ravenclaw, but there have been so many brilliant portrayals and I can't imagine this is worthy of being up there with the rest of them. She is definitely all of those things, and I like that you mention that her marriage helped and /is/ helping, since it's very much a process. Thanks again for such a lovely review, I'm glad you enjoyed it! Report Review
I know that I read this last night, but rereading it again now, I think that I appreciated it all that much more. This was such a sweet story -- Cho really does love her Husband in all his eccentricities. And how lovely he sounds, with his enthusiasm for Cho's world despite her seeming nonchalance about the superiority of magic. They really sound like a well matched couple. I'd love to see more of them than this little snippet, but that's the tease that are one-shots.
This was great (was there any doubt?) and I'm very happy you wrote it and am green and a half (so teal?) with envy that you put something like this together as quickly as you did.
xoxoAuthor's Response: Hay gurl haaay! I'm so glad you stopped by again after the first read. I'm skeptical about how 'sweet' it is, per se, because I think Cho is very, very in love with the bitter aftertaste her war experiences have left in her life, but yes, I think Michael's a good match for her. He's a real trooper, dealing with her and loving her anyway. I don't think their life together is all sunshine and daisies and LOTR reenactments, but you never know, I might drop in on them again :P And there was a lot of doubt! Lots of it! I'm still not sure that I like it, but I'm glad I tried and finished (don't know how that happened in such little time either). Thank you, as always~ Report Review
I never actually gave Cho another thought after HP and the Order of the Phoenix. Sorry Cho! But, when I think about it... What her life looks like when she's a grown-up might very well be this. (This loosely translates into 'Good job!')
I love Michael!!! And I think he's good for Cho. Not a constant reminder of Harry Potter and Cedric, someone to distract her from war memories, someone funny and lighthearted and maybe even childlike in the way he waves her wand around quoting Gandalf.
Bit melancholic. Yeah, it's totally possible if not probable that Cho ended up like this.Author's Response: I never thought much of Cho either, tbh. I never hated her as viscerally as a lot of people did back in the day (and still do, I guess), but she was annoying and a crybaby; I understood her, all right, but that never meant that I liked her. I'm still not her biggest fan, but I thought writing her with this overcoming adversity theme would be interesting. She seems capable of a lot more depth than people gave her credit for, and I don't know if she'd come out like this, precisely, but I'm glad you liked it! Michael seems like a goofball to me, a breath of fresh air, but one I think, more than anything, Cho herself thinks of as childlike. He's not scarred the way she is, but Cho kind of... forces immaturity onto him? I guess? Idk, that's what I was thinking of as the fic evolved (I didn't plan it AT ALL), so I'm less skeptical of her love. Yes, it's a wildly melancholic piece (... of course I speedwrite something wildly melancholic), but I'm glad it worked out in the end!
(PS. I'm awful at answering reviews, especially for older fics, but I wanted to thank you for this one and the others you've left on a bunch of my fics -- I only just noticed and I'm ever so grateful that you stopped by and liked my stuff so much.) Report Review
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