This is my 900th review! Woo! :D
I really like the friendship between Godric and Salazar, and how they are around each other, I'm kinda hoping for a Godric and Salazar romance haha.
That's good that Godric wants to save the Dragon, those mean Dragon dealers! I really like how you've shown Godrics bravery and Salazars fear, and Salazar pushing Godric out of the way of the spell, even if he did knock him unconcious.
I absolutely love how they came with the motto like that, :D If only they knew that it would become the motto for the school that they would build.
This was really fun to read, I really enjoyed it and I loved seeing the friendship between both Salazar and Godric, they're really good friends. Report Review
Sam! I've read a couple of these House Cup entries today, so when I saw another one on your author page, I thought I'd stop by and leave a review! :)
I really liked the fact that you based this story on their childhood. The idea that they would go into the forest on adventures is a really nice idea. At first, I did think them to be a little younger than sixteen, but having reread it, I think I was just making an assumption early on.
I liked the way that you portrayed their friendship- they appeared to be close, which is a little sad given their falling out later in life. I think you did well to get the banter and laid-back feeling into that friendship, so well done there.
You managed to weave the challenge features/mentions in really well, especially the five uses of Dragon Blood. That was one of the ones that I rejected as being too difficult initially, yet you managed to incorporate it in such a natural way. Well done :D
-Scott Report Review
Hi, Sam! ☺ For some reason, I suspect this story has been very popular lately. ;)
So, I loved what you did with the friendship between Godric and Salazar. I think a lot of authors forget that these two were supposed to have been friends before their infamous falling out. Even though some of the differences of opinion are already starting to show through, it's obvious that there's a genuine affection between the two of them in your story. The way that Godric makes sure that Salazar eats, even when his father is punishing him, and the way that Salazar protects his fallen friend from the dragon and the Dealers bespeaks a brotherly relationship.
The banter between the two of them as they make their way back from the forest was clever and lighthearted. It definitely sounded like a conversation that the two of them have had on more than just this occasion. And you even managed to come up with a plausible explanation for where the Hogwarts motto came from! That was really, really clever on your part!
I thought you did a great job picking prompts that you could work seamlessly into your story. This didn't sound awkward or forced like most of the entries for this challenge. I commend you for not even bothering with the dreaded "characteristic of the champion's wand" prompt. That one ruined the majority of the stories where it was included.
Suggestions? I did think that it was difficult in several places to follow which character was speaking because of the lack of dialog tag verbs. Especially during the conversation between Godric and Salazar on the way back to Salazar's home. I also saw one small typo:
Men clad in animal furs and leaves came out into the clearing and used their wands to control the creature, while trying protecting themselves from potential fire. - while trying to protect themselves?
Overall, this was a really good entry. I think it makes a fine free-standing story, even without the challenge. Nice job! Report Review
I really liked this story a lot. Gryffindor and Slytherin ad close friends was really interesting, especially as so many stories are about after the rift between them. I really liked how they came up with the Hogwarts motto on the spot like that, too. Great story! Report Review
I love your portrayal of Salazar and Godric's friendship! The two of them seemed really close and sometimes I just find it so hard to believe that their friendship ended so bitterly. I think you showed their character traits really well throughout the story. Salazar being so rebellious and sneaky like that and Godric being the helpful, headstrong and brave person he is.
A really great Founders fic, especially since its your first! I do hope that you write a second one, I think it'd be great. I really enjoyed the fact that the story flowed so well. Their 'little' adventure was really cool and I could easily imagine the two of them fighting off Dragon Dealers. Oh, and the banter the two of them had going was funny too. I just really enjoyed this one-shot! Great job! ♥
~Izzy Report Review
This was very well written. I had a difficult time imagining these two friends so young but you wrote it very well. I didn't even notice the prompts until you mentioned them in the author's notes. Both friends coming together to "save" a dragon was an awesome adventure indeed. I could imagine things like this must have happened. It makes me wonder how much longer before they began the foundations for the school we all know and love. I didn't see any grammatical or spelling issues and the flow was really well written. For your first Founders fic, you did an amazing job. Well done.
~Celtic~ Report Review
Hello there! Tag from the Review Battle on the forums?
I loved reading about the founders when they were young. I've always found it very hard to write them, since they come from a time I know so little about and even less about it in the magical community.
Their friendship was very heart warming, with Godric helping Salazar when he got in trouble at home and them going on little adventures.
My favorite part however, was the final one, after Godric woke up and they started writting down uses of dragon's blood and coming up with the school motto. It was such a fun and light story, but it was also action packed and didn't have a boring second!
The pace was very appropriate, the writting flowed perfectly, the descriptions were very good and I loved the overall atmosphere!
Ral (A Gryffindor) :) Report Review
Sam! I'm here to review! And I decided to read this and I am so glad I did. I thought it was really good! I loved how close Godric and Salazar were and how they explained why they call each other Slytherin and Gryffindor. Also, the uses of Dragon's Blood was incorporated really well (And I thought the "To look funny" one was... Funny :P ). Anyways, great story!
Mike.Author's Response: Thank you, Mike. I'm glad you liked it. :)
Sam. Report Review
I didn't remember that "Never tickle a sleeping dragon" was the Hogwarts motto! That's great that you remembered that and tied it into your story.
This story was written so light and carefree, but Salazar's father made me sad. It made all his punishments seem like he grew up in a bad home, although I'm probably looking too much into it.
His friendship with Godric was very well written and portrayed. I loved every minute of it! Wonderful story!
Slytherin House Cup 2012!Author's Response: Yeah, I remembered it halfway through writing and just had to put it in. :P
Yeah, it's sad. He lives in a strict household, but it hasn't gotten to him (yet).
Thank you so much for reviewing. :)
Sam. Report Review
Ooh, I liked these two adventurous young wizards. I think you did a great job on their characterization and I love the idea of "dragon dealers." Very good!
And Salazar getting into trouble all the time was well done too... a rebellious bad boy. I might have to read more Founders. LOL!
And I also really liked their sayings... "Never follow a Gryffindor and Never trust a Slytherin." So true! :)
Great job on this story and congrats on having so many stories now! Are you going for a record? LOL!
Dark WhisperAuthor's Response: Hey, Dark Whisper,
I loved writing the sayings, that was fun. :)
Thank you so much for reviewing. And, no, I'm not going for a record. :P
Sam. Report Review
Hi! I wandered over here from the Slytherin Common Room and just wanted to say that I like your story a lot! I like getting to see young versions of Gryffindor and Slytherin, their friendship seems believable despite their differences. I like that the story prompts are worked in in a very natural way, as well.
The one critique I have is that the way the dialog is formatted within the paragraphs makes it sometimes difficult to tell who is saying what. Breaking the dialog out into separate paragraphs would fix this.
Great job overall! :)Author's Response: Thank you. I'm really glad you liked it. I'll go back and look at the dialogue format, Thank you for pointing it out. :)
Sam. Report Review
Founders are usually another thing I run from, but this was a good one. To see the bickering boys as best friends, as most friends do, was refreshing. To hear about their boyhood, ambitions, and what they could do at that age was very much enough to make it a good plot. Good foreshadowing, as well. Well done!Author's Response: This was my first Founders and I was kind of nervous about it, so thank you so much. I'm glad you liked it. :)
Sam. Report Review
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