Reading Reviews for Reading The Picture
  
4 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Iellwen Reading The Picture

14th February 2014:
Hi there! Review swap :D
I couldn't resist a Dramione!!

I really liked this one-shot; it's a light and enjoyable read.

I love that Hermione knows Draco's little secrets without them even being friends; just because she's been looking.
The idea of Malfoy being secretly interested in Muggle culture and history is an eternal plus point - though I don't know what Shug is (besides the slang word for 'sugar', apparently), could you add an A/N or a few lines about that children's book Draco is seen reading? :)
I love that you've given him secret glasses he only wears when he's alone.

It's interesting that Draco lets his guard down around her, sits down besides her during the sunset moment and brushes her hair off her face. And how he brushes it off her face again after her torture.

Their dialog is nice.
I had to read 'Beautiful' 'Don't get hurt, stupid Gryffindor' and 'Stay safe, bushy' 3 times because at first, I thought those were lines from 3 different persons (in that one particular context, maybe too much spacing? ^^) Don't get hurt and stay safe felt a bit redundant, so maybe one would be enough?

I love when she says his hands used to be so much softer; she thinks it, whispers it and then says it louder, I love it :D


All in all, it might do this one-shot some good if you took a few minutes to read it out loud to yourself (it's a tip I've been given; it works wonders^^) and added spacing here and there... You know, to nip the 'Blah-blah' effect in its bud ^^
I read the chapter three times, so I gathered most of the crucial info but I have to admit the read was a bit tedious - not because of your writing or the plot; I enjoyed both.
It really was the spacing (or lack of) Maybe that's just me, but I felt the story's flow was slowed down by the packed paragraphs... Since you're already separating the events & memories, maybe you could also air the ideas and actions a bit more?

Anyway. I really liked it, thanks for the read!
And Happy Valentine's ;)

Author's Response: This is a great review! I'm so glad that the affect that Hermione knows all his secrets came off. I haven't looked at this one shot in god knows how long and it's good to have some feedback.

When I wrote this I honestly didn't know anything about spacing. Since the queue has been moving so fast recently, I think I'll edit it tonight.

This was an amazingly helpful review. Thanks so much!


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Review #2, by AlexFan Reading The Picture

4th August 2013:
You have a way of letting your reader know whose point of view your story is being told from. You never mention the characters name but within a few sentences the reader has already figured out who you're talking about and you don't need to mention the characters name.

The only thing that I would point out is that you have huge paragraphs which make your story difficult to read. I would suggest cutting them in half so instead of having one paragraph you've got two.

I liked the tone of this though, Hermione sounds so tired, it's expected because she was after all tortured but you managed to get that feeling through. I'm not sure whether you wanted it to be that way but that's how it came across.

Anyway, this was really interesting!

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I think I've learned to develop that style, because I tend to write that way for some reason. I'm glad you liked it. Her tiresomeness was intentional, and I'm glad that came across as well.

And, I wrote this a long time ago, so I'm completely surprised there isn't more wrong with it than that! I will fix up my mega paragraphs soon. Thank you so much for my review!


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Review #3, by camiegail Reading The Picture

21st June 2013:
I wasn't sure about this at first...I don't really ship Hermione and Draco... But wow!! I love it!!

Author's Response: Thank you! I tried not to make it too generic, and I'm glad you've found an appreciation.

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Review #4, by Sairahi Reading The Picture

19th August 2012:
Nice work. Fun imagery too!

Author's Response: Thank you, I hoped it would come across.

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