I really liked this, it's my first read on this site in a long long time and I wanted a nice little one shot to get me back into it and this did a great job.
I struggled at times to follow the accent, the way you'd typed it made Fleur's mum a little hard to understand but nothing that I couldn't figure out with a little bit of thought and common sense.
Great job and I like how you still made it cannon despite the obvious extra of the teen pregnancy.
Loved it :) Report Review
It was great...only thing I noticed is you said she got pregnant at an after party celebrating the end of the final challenge...but if Cedric was the father that had to be wrong. He couldn't be the dad because he died during the last challenge...but I didn't know if you were going by the book or not...reallyk good job:)Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it!
Oops, I didn't catch that! I meant to put after the first challenge, my mistake. (:
Thanks for the review and I'll fix that problem! (: Report Review
aww this story is brilliantly written :)
you have captured fleur really well and i was totally shocked when i read that cedric was his father. I love how they are reunited at the end, so sweet.
I know she would be like 13/14 (i think?) but it would have been nice to know how her sister gabrielle had reacted to finding out fleur was pregnant and about her choosing adoption. it would also have been nice if we saw Bill's reaction to finding out that his wife has a son. would fleur have told him about the past? or would it have been a total shock?
A brilliant heart warming story and very well written
-potterfan310Author's Response: Awh, thanks!
Cedric, I thought, wasn't a cliche, overdone choice, and I believe it was probable (:
I almost included a scene with Gabrielle, but then I cut it /:
Bill's reactions are left to the reader's imagination. (:
I'm so glad you enjoyed it, that makes me smile! :) Report Review
This was really heartfelt. I could feel everything Fluer was going through as i read this you captured the emotion perfectly. there were a few discrepancies however, at one point the nurse mentioned that natalie and darren were to be there at 11 you had the time listed at 10:48 and said that there were 12 minutes left and then later said noon was the time Natalie and Darren were to show up. Overall a great story and a good read.Author's Response: Awh, thanks so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it! :) Report Review
This was so cute! I wanted to cry through the whole thing (okay, you caught me, I did cry through the whole thing) and it was so beautiful! I'm glad you gave Fleur and her mother their accents, it made it much more realistic. I think Fleur made the right decision and I think it would make a good sequel with Vic, Dom or Louis meeting him :)
-AmandaAuthor's Response: Awh, thanks you! I'm so glad you liked it!
The accents - whew! I'm glad someone enjoyed them, those were not the easiest part of the story to do :p Lol But, it was worth it :)
I currently have no plans for a sequel, but who knows! It could happen, just keep your eyes open for one! :) Report Review
Oh my god. I don't think I have cried like that in quite some time! Not cedric! No! No! Poor Fleur! How awful:'( not the story but the situation!
This was brilliant, by the way!
EverAuthor's Response: Awh, thanks Ever!! :D
Your review made me smile :)
I thought Cedric would be a new, not overdone choice, but it was still quite probable (in my opinion)
I'm glad you enjoyed it soo much! :) Report Review
Poor Fleur! I could really feel her pain throughout this piece. Giving up her son just seemed so hard for her and you portrayed it perfectly.
Teenage pregnancy is such a difficul issue to write about well, but I thought you handled it beautifully as well as realistically. The pain and sadness were there, but that the same time it was very bittersweet.
The ending was very sweet and gave it a nice fairy tale ending for the real world- if that makes any sense at all. All in all it was a wonderful story. You did a marvelous job.Author's Response: Awh, thanks for the lovely review! Sorry for such a late response :p
I'm so glad you were able to connect to her, I wanted to make readers feel for her.
Thank you! Teen pregnancy is difficult to do without it being cliche, but I hadn't seen a story written like this before (:
I'm so glad you liked it! :) Report Review
You most certainly did pull this of! Quite beautifully, in fact. I could just feel for Fleur, it was obviously a very difficult decision for her. I like how you portrayed her as a pregnant teen, without making her seem like a, shall we say, scarlet woman. That is very well done.
Also, it is an interesting idea to make Cedric the father. I've never read a Fleur/Cedric and I think it is a good way to avoid the whole telling-the-father situation.
If I have one imperfection to point out, it would be the French accents. They were mostly difficult to understand. Also, when Fleur talks to her mother and people, she would be speaking in French, although of course that would be too much. The accents should be a bit clearer, though.
I love how he reunites with her at the end. I do want to know how Bill reacts! No matter what, I picture this story having a nice happy ending with Fleur reuniting with her long lost son. It's a lovely story.Author's Response: Awh, this review made me smile soo much! I really wanted readers to connect to her, and feel what she was going through. She's (like you said) not a scarlet woman, just a teenager who got herself in to a rather adult situation and had to make a very tough, adult decision.
I'd never read a Fleur/Cedric either! but, I thought it probable (:
I apologize for the accents :/ I went a little over the top, I was trying to give them the accents, but I think it was rather over done, too :p
I wanted it to have a full circle ending, where she sees him again, I thought it rather touching :')
I'm leaving Bill's reaction to the imagination of the reader. :)
I'm soo glad you enjoyed, that makes me smile. :) Report Review
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