Hello! Deeds here to review your challenge entry. I'm very excited to see what you have written here. Just a heads up. The challenge closes in a week I believe. If no one needs a small extension the results should be up the next day in a blog on the archives.
Let's begin reading this entry, shall we?
"Well, Draco, I have got your Mother-" He paused, what had he got Narcissa?
I love little Draco! I just love writing my own Draco stories when he was younger and seeing him outwit his father. Poor Lucius.
I am getting Mr. Sev; I'll be back in a sec.
^ Father of the year right here. Leaving his child all alone. Oh Lucius.
Draco grinned at the two men. "Still hungry."
"Finished!" Lucius pronounced and gave Severus a huge hug. It was very un-manly of him but he was overwhelmed with happiness.
^ Oh boy. They hug and everything. What a bromance!
I loved the ending! It was very sweet. I thought the idea of them cooking together was hysterical and it was great that you brought Draco in as sort of the 'overseerer' making comments here and there, stressing the two out.
I enjoyed their bromance immensely. The only CC I have is that you're missing a page break towards the end because it jumped very randomly to him saying that she loved the dinner. I had to do a double take. Also, your description, you could have added a little more here and there to talk about the food and the cooker, give us a real big image there. I also would have liked to hear more about the Unbreakable Vow.
But I still really enjoyed it! And now Iím really hungry. I'd love some garlic bread!
Thank you so much for joining my challenge. The results will be posted soon. Good luck!Author's Response: Thanks! I'm glad that you liked it! I may not of come anything but this was my first bromance, and I'm really glad you enjoyed it!! Report Review
That was really adorable :) I couldn't stop smiling for a few minutes after I finished reading.Author's Response: Oh, thank you!!! Report Review
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