I like the moping part :) brilliant!!Author's Response: Thanks, Semya. Inspiration came from Badji, you know xD Report Review
It was an okay chapter .I really don't get the moping bit though !Author's Response: LOL! Oh really Vibbles? It was based on you! Sorry I'm taking ages 2 update! :P Report Review
oh! revenge! cool cant wait! again awesome writing style and really funny!Author's Response: Revenge is sweet, literally... next chapter will be up soon and thanks for reading :) Report Review
wow that was really good,i totally get how sisters fall out like that,really funny,good liturature!Author's Response: Thanks, I'm glad you can relate to it :) Report Review
I have to say that the quality of writing in this chapter has improved from the first chapter. Then again, I think chapters with a lot of dialogue can always be hard to deal with, so no worries.
I like how you have incorporated a bit of the French language with Victoire and Dominique. That makes total sense due to their mother being French and all.
Another detail I really enjoyed had to be how you incorporated the muggle movies and wizarding movies. I don't think it was ever mentioned in the books about wizarding movies, and even if it wasn't, that's a nice touch. I love the added detail to this story, including the fight with Albus and James.
The way you described Dominique's moping was quite nice too. Overall, just a few grammatical errors, but nothing major that distracted from the story. Good job, and I hope you update this soon.Author's Response: I'm really happy you think so...Again, I'm working on the grammar :/
I'm glad you like the wizard movie bit... I noticed that I hadn't read a single fanfic that mentioned that wizards had movies at all, which I thought I would like to bring in to my stories.
Oh and I got the moping part from a friend of mine who excels in that field as well as Dominique :D
Thank you for the review and chapter 3 will be up shortly! Report Review
Okay, so this is the first post potter gen fic I have read in ages, and I think before I only read a few Scorpius/Rose fics, so congrats on being the first to break that!
Overall, I think this is a very good start to the story. I love how you show the sibling rivalry between Dominique and Victoire. Although they are probably closer in age then Louis would be to them, that doesn't necessarily mean they would be close, so I really like this. I had an older sister myself, and it was kind of annoying at times.
I also like the added touch of her saying she hates Dominique. When people are young, they often say things they regret and do not mean, if only to hurt the person so they leave us alone.
I do want to comment on a couple of issues though. I did notice a few grammatical issues, especially with the dialogue. I typically put "speech" around anything I say instead of just 'speech'. I hope that makes sense.
I also hope in further chapters that you develop Victoire's friends more, which I'm sure you plan on doing since you are writing more then one chapter to this story. :D
Overall, I liked this story so far, and please do not be discouraged by my advice. I am trying to review more fics to hopefully get more reviews myself, and so I'm just offering some friendly advice in the process.
Anyways, on to chapter two!Author's Response: Wow, I am so honored that this is your first non-Scorose next gen fic! Thank you so much!
I'm glad you like the plot and yes, I do plan on doing several more chapters although I'll try to keep it in the short story range.
I have noticed some of the grammatical errors too and am trying to find a beta for that :P
I hope it doesn't bother you but somehow I prefer putting 'speech' to "speech" since I use the latter for sarcasm or second person dialogue. But if it really does bother you, I'll try to alter that in the future :)
Vic's friends will make an appearance further chapters, not now, but towards the end where I hope to expand on their characters...
Thank you again for the lovely and helpful review and I hope to get more from you :D Report Review
This is a really funny story! I can relate to Dominique, 'cause when I was younger, I remember my older sister always bossing me around and not letting me talk to her 'Grown up girl Friends'!
I can't wait for the next chapter!Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm glad you like my story and chapter 3 is on the way!
This looks like its going to be a really good story!! I like the way you portray Fleur (the way she talks an' all)...
You seem to like annoying sisters a lot! (Kelsey from your other story?) :P
I wanna read more Dominique and Victoire!! Can't wait for the next chapter! (Partly because I want to know what happens to Vic for using magic... O_O)Author's Response: Hey Nag! Thanks for the review xD
Yeah I noticed that annoying sister thing too, but I love Dom and Kelsey!
BTW, Next chappy is about Dom, and 3rd chappy is where the Vic-gets-in-trouble-for-hexing-Dom part comes in! Report Review
I love how realistic this is! Very relatable. As someone who's been in a very similar position to Victoire's I have to say that I can't blame her for what she did. Very nice work!Author's Response: Thank you! I get my inspiration from one of my best friends whose always complaining about her little sister :) Report Review
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