Reading Reviews for Shenanigans and Hi-Jinks
56 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Penelope Inkwell Fruitless Research

21st August 2015:
Thank heaven she was just straightforward about it! And Juliet was perfectly reasonable. The angst that can be avoided when people are just honest and no one gets huffy!

Fred and Victoire's relationship is so cute. I've never seen a fic before in which he was old enough to be one of her close friends at Hogwarts, but it could happen, and here I like it.

Now I've just got to know what he's found out!, not that it's the most important thing, but erm...will we get to see Teddy again? Soon-ish? I'm dying to see more of his and Victoire's interactions!


“Why don’t you go tell talk to them about it?”
--we've got both "tell" and "talk to" right here, and the sentence only needs one of them.

I've enjoyed this fic, and I'm glad I got to stop by and read it. Congrats again on your Dobby pre-nom!


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Review #2, by Penelope Inkwell An Encounter in the Forest

21st August 2015:
Oh, okay, well that's freaky.

I like the idea of Victoire being a magical creatures enthusiast who sneaks into the Forbidden Forest to see them. And that bit about the car was a really fun detail--it made me smile.

*Br* the way you described that banshee, though. SO creepy. Why did you touch the comb, Victoire?! This is exactly the kind of mistake she'd never have made if her parents had the good sense to take her to Knockturn Alley. It's like a Scared Straight tactic--you learn to never touch anything that looks like it might be a Dark and powerful object. Mystical silver comb, lying on the ground, shining on the moonless night in the Forbidden Forest?! I never thought I'd say this, but listen to Fred!!!


(though they’d been unable to salvage its eggs, much to Fred’s dismay).
--"salvage" doesn't seem like quite the right word here. It implies that the Ashwinder they'd found was dead or something. Salvage is when, like, you're saving something that otherwise will be lost/trash, which doesn't seem to be the case here. Was Fred wanting to catch a glimpse of the eggs? Steal them and sell them on the black market? I'd suggest a word, normally, but here I can't tell exactly what he wanted.

“Vic!” Fred burst into the small clearing, breathing hard. “What the hell?”
--this struck me as a bit odd, because it seemed like he was right with her until this moment. Maybe you could have her run off towards the comb and leave him behind? That would explain why he bursts in after her in such a huff.

Another really enjoyable chapter! I'm liking this fic a lot.


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Review #3, by Penelope Inkwell Arrival at Hogwarts

21st August 2015:
I really liked Professor Goldstein--Anthony Goldstein, from the D.A., I'm guessing? I like that you made it someone who was a minor character in the books. It makes sense that he'd become an Auror, since they got to go straight into the department after fighting in the Battle of Hogwarts. Plus, the way you write him is just so...professorial. He reminds me a bit of McGonagall in that he's kind of stern, but you like him anyway, but he's still clearly his own character. Given the hijinks that it sounds like she's prone to getting into, Victoire is probably lucky he's watching out for her, even if he has probably given her a few detentions.

I also love that you have Victoire, a Ravenclaw, still getting involved in pranks and such. It's not just the Gryffindors! Good for her.

Oh no. That's a definite downside to living in a room full of girls. I pity her, I really do. Girl does need to invest in a good set of earplugs. I'm shocked she's lasted this long without them.


and that she’d sense some real intensity
--"sense" should probably be "sensed"

"She got really red and started giggling, and then he kissed her cheek and followed Holly upstairs.”
--Who is Holly? She just kinda came out of nowhere. At first I thought it was implying that he was going with Holly up to the dormitories to, like, snog or whatever, but that doesn't make sense because he just asked Juliet out.

Another good chapter! I'm enjoying this fic so far.


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Review #4, by Penelope Inkwell Meeting the Train

21st August 2015:
Bahaha! Smelling her hair. Oh gosh.

So Fred knows, but Victoire didn't. How long has Teddy liked her? Does everyone know.

Man, they really do have good friends, dragging their trunks of the train for them. Hold on to those two. They're gems. (Seriously, that's not a carry-on bag. That's a giant trunk, and they've got their own to haul up to the castle, as well. I'm pretty sure that's the measure of true friendship).

Man, they almost got away with it, too! So close.


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Review #5, by Penelope Inkwell Missing the Train

21st August 2015:
Hey! I'm here checking out the Dobby pre-noms (congratulations, by the way), and so I wanted to stop by and read this one. Victoire and Fred are really cute! And Teddy! I haven't read enough Teddy/Victoire lately, so I'm looking forward to some of that :D

This chapter clips along quite nicely. There's plenty of detail to picture the scenes, and a good balance of dialogue and action.

Really though, who does set their clock 5 minutes slow? *face palms*

However, if it serves as an excuse to visit Teddy, I'm for it!

Awww! Does Teddy have a crush? Maybe? *waggles eyebrowa*

CC: So, as a rule, I always try to give CC, but I just want to applaud you, because I did not notice a single spelling or mechanical error here, and that is phenomenal!

"but she also spied several of him with his friends, and, to her surprise, a few number of her."
--"a few number of her" doesn't sound quite right. Maybe: "a few of her", or "a few pictures of her," might sound better?

“Well, it won’t be food off the trolley, but it probably won’t be terrible, either. Are either of you thirsty?”
--This is well into the realm of the mega nitpicky, but you have so few other errors that that's the realm we're in. ;) This is just a flow thing, but since just asked, "Are either of you hungry?", it's a bit repetitive to ask about drinks in the same way. It might be more natural if he just said, "Thirsty?"

Glad I stopped by. And now I'd like to read on a bit!


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Review #6, by MuggleMaybe Fruitless Research

20th August 2015:
Hi Beezie!

I found your story on the Dobbys Rec/Review thread.

What a fun story! I love your characterizations of Vic and Fed - especially Vic! I think she is frequently type cast, and I love that your rendition is feistier. Shenanigans and Hi-Jinks indeed!

The new plot line with the comb is quite intriguing. I never really thought about students going out in the Forest just for something to do. In the original series, it was usually by force or out of desperation that they went to the forest, not just for fun. But I find it very believable that students would do this, and be a bit reckless about it.

What a funny, entertaining, a charismatic story!
Keep up the good work!

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Review #7, by RavenclawFTW Fruitless Research

16th August 2015:
Heya Branwen! Here for the swap and BvB!

So, I always love reading this story and your interpretations of Fred and Victoire. I don't want to talk too much about everything I always seem to focus on when I review this story, but I just love this Victoire so much.

Something I loved in this chapter was how Fred joined Victoire even though he didn't approve of her taking the comb in the first place. In fic, I see characters turning their backs on their friends because they don't agree with their decisions, but I love how close Vic/Fred are and how he helps her despite his misgivings. That said, I was surprised that Fred seemed so casual about the whole affair. He ribbed Victoire about it, sure, but given the strong emotional/gut response he had to the comb in the previous chapter, I was surprised he seemed so calm and collected about it this chapter, more curious than anything. I'd've expected him to continue to voice his apprehension about it.

I'm also slightly concerned about Juliet's character at this point in the story. Victoire seems to consistently say that Juliet is a nice girl beneath the hysterical reactions to Fred/her relationship, but it's hard to take that at face value when I don't feel like I've really seen her doing anything besides freak out about Fred. I'm a little confused about what he sees in her besides that she really likes him/is pretty. In this chapter, she definitely redeems herself slightly by her quick understanding of Victoire's request, but it's hard for me to really understand much about her or her relationship with Fred.

I really enjoyed the little insight into Carolyn/Wendy's relationship in this chapter and to see that kind of mature relationship. I also liked that Victoire stayed with them to talk so long-- so often in fic I feel like every couple is just totally unbearable to be around, but that's not true at all! So I liked seeing Victoire getting along so nicely with Wendy.

Then I also really enjoyed the research about the comb-- they didn't find anything right away, which adds to the suspense, but also seems really believable. I'm really excited to learn what Fred found out about it!

Hope you update soon! :)


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Review #8, by Aphoride An Encounter in the Forest

16th August 2015:
Hey there, Branwen! :D Dropping by for our swap for BvB fest! :) I just had to come back to this - I wasn't sure I'd reviewed this one or not, so I'm glad (? I think, haha) that I hadn't - though there was another chapter, so even if I had, it would have been fine ;)

Anyway, enough rambling! :P You know I love this fic, and Vic and Fred - and I was so so excited to see them get going with the whole drama/adventure side of things - not that, you know, missing the train and all wasn't adventure, but this is starting to tie in with the summary, which I love so much, and I'm so so excited to see where you go from here with this and all! :)

I love the way Vic and Fred are so casual about popping into the Forbidden Forest - and even how Micah is usually pretty fine with it, but only after the beginning of the year and the threat of trouble dies down (you know, it's little things like that which make your characterisation so full and so wonderful - the sheer level of detail in each of your characters is amazing!) - despite it being totally against the rules and really pretty dangerous. It's such a great side to them both, and I love how Vic is even more relaxed about it than Fred is, so calm and collected even in high-pressure situations. It's a really interesting trait for her to have, but a really useful one too - and one which isn't often seen in fic, strangely enough.

Oh my gosh. That scene in the forest was so... creepy. Like strangely unearthly, and just creepy... but there was this beautiful layer of human interaction in it, between Vic and the banshee which was so lovely - it gave it all this kind of almost-human quality to it, which sort of made it even more creepy, if that makes sense :P I loved the way it happened almost so innocuously, but there was still that sense of danger, that things weren't quite right, and how the comb ended up still with her. Again, it's so creepy, and so suspenseful because why is it there, and how did it get back into her pocket (which I think the answer to is 'magic' :P), and what does it mean - is it really a portent of death, like Fred thinks, or is Vic right and it's not quite as serious as all that? (Though I'm inclined to believe Fred, tbh :P) I really, really wanna read the next chapter and find out (shame I have to cook dinner :P) - you've made me so curious! :)

As always, your writing is so lovely in this - you manage everything in this story so well: the bits of humour, the irritation and the guilt Vic feels in previous chapters, to the darker, more suspenseful bits of this chapter - it's a real skill, because they're so hard to weave into the same thing, and do equally as well, but you manage it so effortlessly I'm almost jealous ;) Plus your description in this, the comb and the light coming off it, the banshee herself, were so so gorgeous, too - I could picture it so easily, you know?

This is such a brilliant story - I know I've told you that before, but it's worth repeating, I think! ;) I'm so so looking forward to getting a chance to read the next chapter and seeing what - if anything - happens with the comb! :D

Aph xx

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Review #9, by DracoFerret11 Fruitless Research

15th August 2015:
Hi Branwen! Me again, here to review for the BvB, as well as my love of this story! So, let's go over things:

Grammar/Spelling: I only noticed one stand-out error. Towards the end you have, "Why don't you go tell talk to them about it?" where you'll need to choose between "tell them" and "talk to them." :)

Plot: Another lovely chapter of this story! I feel like I've gotten really bad about including constructive criticism, since I'm so fond of your writing style and story. I literally never see things that I want to ask you to improve on! It's awful. I'm sorry I'm so useless. But anyhow! This was another great chapter. I like that you've drawn out the mystery of the comb. I'm so interested to see what it is and what's going to happen, but I like that you didn't just give us that information right away. The search will make it so much better when we finally find out!

Characterization: As always, your Victoire is fabulous. I never thought I would read a Next Gen story that I liked this much at ALL, let alone one that featured Vic as the main character. For some reason I always thought people wrote her as stuck up or rude, but you've taken such an original route in constructing her as a character, and I love that. I think she's unique and interesting to read, and I love the positive relationships she has with other women. It's so subtle (way better than I can do), but so great. You really get her interactions down pat when it comes to how she talks to each of her friends, as well as Fred. I'm really excited to read on.

Emotions: I guess if I had any CC for this chapter, it would be that neither Fred nor Vic seem all that upset about what the comb could mean. I get some of their curiosity coming through, but I don't seem much distress. I feel like I'd be doing everything to get rid of the thing, just in case. Or at least worrying that something awful was going to happen. So I wonder just why neither of them seems particularly worried.

Overall, this was a great chapter. I really enjoy reading this story, and I think you're doing your characters real justice. Great job, as always, and I'll read on when you write more.

--Emily/DarkRose || August BvB, Team Bronze

P.S. - This is going in my Favorites now. :)

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Review #10, by magnifique11 Fruitless Research

15th August 2015:
Oh my gosh, I've never read a fic with Vic & Fred being bffs, but I love it! I need more fics like this so I can read all of them. Seriously though, I think your Vic is really unique and fun to read - if also anxiety-inducing because of that comb! I want to know how/why she has it, and I love banshees so I'm excited to see how you'll bring more of that in to the story.

I also wanted to add that I love your headcanons, especially the one about the professors and how class scheduling works because it makes so much sesne, especially considering how many students Hogwarts has. I may have to adopt some of the same ideas, (though of course I would never copy them - that's never okay).

I'm really looking forward to reading more and this is definitely a new favorite! :)


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Review #11, by navyfail Missing the Train

14th August 2015:
Hey, Branwen! Here for the BvB fest as well as returning some of the kind reviews you left for me during last month's battle.

I've always imagined Victoire and Fred having an age difference between them since I like to think that Fred and James are best friends, but you write there friendship well. They seem to be able to read each other's minds at times and are both really carefree. If I missed the the train, I would be freaking out yet they both stay really calm and collected. They even thought of going to Teddy's. I have to say flooing to their uncle's shop sounds a lot faster than going on the Hogwarts Express and not to mention that they get to see a dark creature exhibit.

I like the hint of Teddy/Victoire you put in here with the photos. I mean he has three of her! That's so cute even though she doesn't get why. Also, I'm surprised that she didn't stare when Teddy opened the door shirtless. Maybe she's just that used to him? And Teddy even proposed being roommates with her after Hogwarts! (Though I think he was teasing for the most part but I'll still take it.) I'm going to take a guess that Fred already knows that Teddy likes her. He seems perceptive like that.

I really like where you are going with this story! It seems very lighthearted but interesting and humorous. And the fact that you've been able to create your own world of characters and stick to them has always been amazing to me! I enjoyed reading this! Great work!


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Review #12, by UnluckyStar57 Missing the Train

13th August 2015:
Hi Branwen! Here for our swap and the BvB Review Fest! :D

Okay, so this is SO FUN! I totally am in love with Fred II right now, and all of the different possible characterizations that he might have, and so I LOVE the way you've written him here. He might have a good relationship with James in this story, but I can't tell yet because he's total BFFs with Victoire (or seems to be). At the very least, putting Fred and Vic together as partners in crime is such a cool and different idea, and I can't wait to see what other fun shenanigans they'll get up to at Hogwarts!

And I love the way you opened this, too. Like, missing the train was such a natural occurrence that they were already planning on telling lies about it. And then they saw their parents and some artful dodging ensued. Hah, I still laugh about how Fred was so self-assured, like "oh yeah, we'll be on that train," oh no, you won't, Fred. (And while I'm looking at her, that CI is SO PRETTY.)

Aaahhh, I have a feeling that this fic is not going to be all about Tedoire, but I love the *wink wink nudge nudge* that you've got in this chapter towards the ship. Aww, it's so cute that Teddy has a total of three pictures featuring Vic, and then the very nice blushy feelings that Vic gets when he says he loves her awww... I'm sure Fred feels pretty left out of this, but that's probably for the best. :P

The idea of a magical menagerie is really cool, like, an advanced petting zoo that isn't for the faint of heart. Vic, Ted, and Fred, not being faint-hearted, will have a really good time there!

(But oh, what kind of wrath will they face from their parents?)

"Rox won't snitch," Fred says. Oddly, I get the feeling that Rox is going to snitch. What can go wrong, must go wrong, right?

I love this opening chapter, and I hope to continue on and read more soon! I know you already have a lot of reviews on this chapter, but I always find it worthwhile to review things in order. :)


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Review #13, by Unicorn_Charm Missing the Train

12th August 2015:
Hey there! Here with your review!! :)

Ooh I think I found a new story I'm going to be addicted to! XD

The opening of this chapter really was funny. I laughed out loud a few times. :)

Fred had given her an easy smile and said, “Oh, don’t worry. We’re not going to miss the train.”

They missed the train.

This was perfection!

I don't think I've seen many fics where Victoire and Fred are the same age, but I really, really like the dynamic you've written between them. I cannot wait to read more of them. They seem more like siblings than cousins, to be honest. I love it.

Oh Teddy ♥ I am so in love with Teddy Lupin and I'm already loving your version of him. He seems so sweet and so cool. Like someone that I would need to be friends with (and probably would have a bit of a crush on). And he can cook! Score! Are he and Vic already together? Or does she just kind of like him at this point? I'm just going to have to keep going and find out. :p

I love that they missed the train. And I love that Fred set his watch slow. Who does that? Haha But they're right, spending the day hanging it in Hogsmeade with Teddy does seem more fun than riding the train to school.

I love this already! I'm so glad that you responded to my status and I had a chance to find this story. I will without a doubt be back to read on. This is a great start to what I'm sure is going to be a wonderful story! Thanks so much for sharing!! ♥

xoxo Meg

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Review #14, by Frankie05 Missing the Train

12th August 2015:
Hello :)

I like this. I've never read a teddy/Victoire before but that's because I haven't really gotten into Next Gen.

I have so many questions- why were they late? Why were they not with their families? What is going through Teddy's head? I'm sure this will All be answered in due time.

The beginning seemed a little jumpy but it quickly smoothed out once they were on their way to Teddy's. I liked how family oriented Teddy is, and his family is his grandmother and the Wotter clan no doubt. But Victoire is surprised to see photos of herself there and she gets the woopy feeling when she sees it. I love the foreshadowing. Especially when she said "'make me breakfast every morning" and he said "come live with me". I've noticed most people lack the insight of foreshadowing but you've nailed it.

One of things I had a problem with was the date. No matter what day of the week it was, the Hogwarts express always left on the 1st. I'm curious why you changed that?

All in all- it's a good start to the story. I definitely plan to continue reading this so that I can follow along and learn more.


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Review #15, by DracoFerret11 An Encounter in the Forest

11th August 2015:
Hi Branwen! This is DarkRose from the forums, here to review for you for the BvB! (Also, of course, to review because I love this story.) So, let's go over things:

Plot: AHHH! Okay, let's talk about the calm parts before I get all spazzy. First off, good job with the characterization of Vic, Fred, and Micah at the beginning. I thought Micah's hesitation was really good. (Also, did I catch that his parents are lesbians? -- as much of a deterrent that his mothers clearly wished they were -- If so, lovely! If not, you wrote "mothers," plural. ;) ) Now, on to the craziness! OH MY GOSH! I was so nervous when they were creeping around the forest. And the banshee! Such fantastic descriptions. I could practically see her. She was so ridiculously eerie. Great job! As for how Vic got the comb back...I don't know! Maybe the banshee just teleported it back in there, I suppose. But what does it mean?! No one is going to die, right? I feel like so many people died while Harry was at school; Hogwarts doesn't need that crap a whole generation later! AHH!

Characterization: Again, great characterization. I was in Vic's boat -- a little disappointed that Fred was being such a spoil sport. But I also know I would totally have been him in that situation. Or, moreover, I would have bolted out of there and abandoned my cousin. But I think you wrote Vic really well. She's such an awesome character. I love her.

Emotions: So creepy. So totally creepy. And you captured that so well. You didn't shirk away from the weirdness of the Dark Forest or their situation, which I like. And I bought Vic's curiosity at the banshee, rather than fear. I think you earned that reaction from what you've written before now. So...good job!

Overall, this was such a crazy awesome chapter. I can't wait to read more. You're making me a fan of Next Gen! No! ;) Lovely writing, as always.

--Emily || August BvB, Team Bronze

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Review #16, by manno_malfoy Arrival at Hogwarts

8th August 2015:
Hello! I'm still around for the BvB!

I just love how you're slowly letting us into this whole world you have in your head for these characters. There are minor characters all over the chapter, which makes things a lot more realistic. And it's great how you've included Seamus somehow. I don't know why you didn't tell us who the woman that is his second is, but seeing how well-constructed this story has been so far, I'm going to guess it's intentional?

I didn't know what I was expecting for your Victoire post-Hogwarts, but working with magical creatures perfectly suits the Victoire you've been introducing us to the past few chapters. And it's cool that you've mentioned that Dominique is interested in dragons as well. It's nice to know that in your world, Charlie isn't completely out of the picture.

Another great thing you've got going with characterisation here is how Victoire is a Ravenclaw but still is careless and gets in trouble. It makes sense that there all sorts of intellectual people, and not all of them are goody-two-shoes book nerds. So I think you're doing a wonderful job with keeping things believable and logical!

I have concerns for Victoire thanks to Fred and Juliet because you've said earlier that Fred is attractive and everybody likes him. And if they're doing this to her, thinking she has any hand in the matter, when things are just starting out and are all dandy, what will they do to her when/if Fred messes up?

I don't know if this counts as a review since I'm just mostly gushing about your characters and how I'm starting to care about them. But whatever, I'm enjoying it and I've got other chapters to get to! :D


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Review #17, by manno_malfoy Meeting the Train

8th August 2015:
Continuing on for the BvB review fest, but also for all the fun.

This chapter was even more fun because there was more teasing and more uncomfortable situations for Victoire. I'm really starting to like your Fred. He sees through Victoire (as best friends should) and through Roxanne. It seems as though she too is trouble, but in a less obvious way. I'm looking forward to seeing how you'll include her throughout the story because she already seems like a fun character.

It was amusing and realistic to have Fred notice that Teddy likes Victoire. In my experience, the best friend always notices such advances. But the fact that he brought it up really reinforces how close they are and what their friendship is like. I'm wondering how you'll be including Teddy, now that they're at Hogwarts and he isn't, but I guess we'll see.

It was fun getting introduced to their friends Micah and Lexy, especially in a way that also gives us an brief idea as to what they're like.

And yay for a Neville appearance! I hope we'll see more him being all serious and authoritative in the next chapter!

I like how this is such a light read, but with such complex, well-developed characters already. I'll probably spend the rest of the day going through the other chapters.


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Review #18, by manno_malfoy Missing the Train

8th August 2015:
Hey there! I've here for the BvB review fest! And I'm glad I'm finally reading something by you!

I guess Fred is usually troublesome, but Victoire? I don't think I'd come upon another story that portrays her this way. I like the energy they both give off so far and how they get along. I really do like Teddy/Victoire, so I just can't help but wonder if Teddy already realises that he has feelings for her. One can never tell when 'I love you' is being passed around so casually. So I'm eager to see how it'll develop from here. But it's so adorable how he has three pictures of her already.

I felt that this is a great first chapter. It gives us a quick glimpse at the three main characters and gives us just enough information to get a feel for the dynamic between them. I really enjoyed this first chapter and I'm excited to see what comes next.


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Review #19, by CassiePotter Arrival at Hogwarts

7th August 2015:
Hello again! I'm here for another chapter!
This one was just as good as the first two. I love the way you write all your characters! They're all so unique, and even the minor characters are distinct and stand out.
I was afraid that Victoire and Fred's punishment would be much more harsh than what they got! I would think that a detention would seem like nothing to those two.
I really liked Victoire's talk with Goldstein about her career and what classes she's going to take. I liked what you did to change the Committee for the Disposal of Magical Creatures, and thought it was awesome that Seamus was the new head. I want to know who the woman is that works with him, though!
I thought you did a really nice job with Victoire's classes, too. I liked that there were more classes than just the one's we see in the books.
I feel kind of bad for Victoire since Fred asked Juliet out, and I'd think that would be kind of awkward for her, as his cousin. Especially because those girls seem kind of gossipy! Haha.
This was another really well done chapter. I really enjoyed it!
Cassie :)

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Review #20, by CassiePotter Meeting the Train

7th August 2015:
Hello! I'm here for our review swap!
I'm really excited to get back into this story, since I really loved the first chapter! This one followed it up so well.
Victoire and Fred's banter is so much fun to read, and their chemistry is really great. You can tell how close they are. Also, I loved that Fred noticed Teddy sniffing Vic's hair, and said that he probably would have kissed her if they were alone. I thought you did a good job making Teddy's feelings clear to us in the last chapter, so now Victoire's all caught up, too. Haha. I thought it was great that you made Fred the overprotective one, too. I almost always read him as a really silly character, who doesn't do much besides pull pranks, so I loved that he had a side to him that's a little more serious.
Roxanne is sassy! And I agree with Fred, I could see her in Slytherin.
I really liked Micah and Lexy. They seem like really good friends, and I thought it was sweet that they got Fred and Victoire's trunks for them. I can't wait to read more of the four of them together.
Uh oh! Vic and Fred are in trouble!
This was a great chapter!
Cassie :)

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Review #21, by RavenclawFTW An Encounter in the Forest

7th August 2015:
Heya Branwen! Back for BvB.

I love the interactions with Micah at the beginning of this chapter and the details you've added about Victoire/Fred's relationship with him. The Howler part was really funny to me but also realistic– Howlers really don't seem like a big deal to me, but it makes sense that he takes a while to remember that after being around his family all summer (and away from the influences of Fred and Victoire!).

I like how having a girlfriend seems to be affecting Fred and Victoire's relationship in that it's not changing it drastically or anything, but Fred is a little more cautious and has a little less time to spend with her. That feels like how real life dating cuts into time more than how some fics have a new relationship take all the time away from pre-existing friendships (which also happens, I know, but usually not to the degree I see in fics).

In this chapter I also really thought we got to see Victoire's love of creatures in a different light given the differences between her and Fred and their reactions to the comb/banshee. Victoire was very excited to barrel ahead and check out the comb, while Fred was more cautious about everything. That was also an interesting contrast to see because it seems the opposite of the usual Gryffindor/Ravenclaw divide (rushing into situations vs. taking a moment to think about it). At the same time, Fred's uneasiness seems to stem more from superstition/a gut feeling, which is still a Gryffindor move haha. I really like how you illustrate Victoire's interest and curiosity about all things relating to magical creatures in general, and this chapter did a great job delving into that.

The banshee itself was quite interesting to read about, and I'm so intrigued to see where this comb business gets us! I really don't have any theories or anything, but I liked how the banshee seemed not to care about Fred/Victoire because they weren't going to die haha.

I'm sorry because yet again I've left a review that has no con crit in the least.I swear I leave helpful reviews for other people! Your stories just have nothing that sticks out to me as wrong. :P Stop being so perfect, Branwen! (Just kidding! You know I love it.)

Can't wait for the next chapter to see where this comb thing is going!


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Review #22, by Aphoride Fred Gets a Girlfriend

5th August 2015:
Hey Branwen! :D Dropping by for our review swap and BvB fest ;) I'm so glad you mentioned this story, since I really do love it so much and it seems like a pretty perfect introducation to your whole Next Gen world (which is so impressive and so amazingly detailed but also kinda intimidating because of it :P).

Okay, so you know how much I love your Victoire and Fred - but, the repetition is really needed because they're just such good characters! I love how they're both so real - well, all of your characters are so real,really - and they have so many moments where they say things I would say or I've heard friends say, you know - it's just so so great :) I especially loved their conversation in the library, where Vic didn't really want to hear about Juliet but Fred wanted to talk and the had the kind of passive-aggressive sort of argument :P It was just such a great moment, and so perfect in characterisation and everything, really.

The little mention of Teddy punching guys who said gross things about Victoire is so sweet, haha, and so hinting at future romance (I know you ship them in later stories, though ;D), but also such a great insight into his character, too. Though things like that are so true about guys in life, not all guys for either thing - punching or saying gross things - but some of them.

Also, twelve-year-old Louis is adorable :P So sweet and innocent and rule-abiding. Reminds me so much of me, haha.

I love your writing in this - it's so so amazing. The detail you have in your next gen world is incredible, really it is, and I love how much care and thought you've put into it and therefore in the story as well, it really brings the whole thing to life. Your dialogue, as always, is amazing, and I love the way you manipulate your characters voices when describing places and other people - it's just so good, and so clever.

I gotta say, I'm so so excited to see what happens - with the Animagus thing, and if/when her and Fred next get into trouble, and when they meet the banshee in the forest and just everything else you've got planned for them! :) There's this almost constant sense of anticipation with this story, which I just love :)

Aph xx

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Review #23, by Freda_and_Georgina An Encounter in the Forest

4th August 2015:
Hello! Freda&Georgina here reviewing your entry in our Creative Creatures Challenge!
Since we haven’t read the full novella, we won’t be focusing on the storyline (which will be hard for Georgina) but rather your portrayal of the banshee, which was amazing! There aren’t that many stories that involve the banshee whenever she’s not working. The way you have the banshee it seems she cannot speak unless she is wailing the foretelling of death. You also don’t have her really caring for the world around her, just the things that involve her (which is accurate to most magical creatures) like the coming deaths and her comb.
The comb was so interesting – one doesn’t think of a creature brushing their own hair but in this case it really works. And then Victoire got it back in the end, we don’t know why that would be. Maybe it’s the banshee’s idea of a thank you; duplicating the comb and letting Victoire keep the duplicate? Trying not to get too into the storyline but you didn’t make it easy…
We really like your take on the banshee, you provided so much in such a small encounter. Keep an eye out for the results to our challenge soon!
-Freda & Georgina

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Review #24, by cherry_pop94 An Encounter in the Forest

30th July 2015:
Hey Branwen! I'm here for our swap!

Woah! This was a pretty crazy chapter! I really like how Vic is the more adventurous of the two - she really seems to have a knack for finding trouble!

You've described the forest really well here! It had just the right amount of creepiness, but with a kind of fun adventure about it. I loved the bit with Fred and Vic finding the old car. It's such a fun little detail to throw in here. The trio's terrifying adventure becomes the next-gen's fun discovery! It's perfect!

I love how you described the banshee. It didn't occur to me until I read this that I really have no idea what a banshee looks like. I've never read about one on the archives before, but yours was great! I definitely got chills when she showed up! I'd have definitely been Fred in that situation - terrified and ready to run.

I cannot wait for the next chapter Branwen! The silver comb!! What is it??

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Review #25, by cherry_pop94 Fred Gets a Girlfriend

29th July 2015:
Hello! I'm here for the new BvB challenge/review fest!

I really enjoyed this chapter. Like I mentioned in my last review, I think, I really love the way you've expanded the Hogwarts curriculum - with the new NEWT classes, more professors. It's very well thought out and makes sense with what I assume must have been a post-war baby boom. I'm very curious to know more about the content of these new classes!

Fred and Victoire were delightful in this chapter. I love how Louis and Lucy is so unlike Victoire, but Roxanne and James are like these two older Weasleys. It's good to have a nice mix in there.

I'm curious to know where the animagus thing with Victoire is going, as well as her relationship with Teddy! Based on Fred's comments, he's had a crush on her for a while.

Can't wait to read more!


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