Reading Reviews for Dying
  
8 Reviews Found

Review #1, by ShadowRose Dying: A One Shot

7th March 2014:
Hello, I'm here for the Blackout Battle!

I don't know what sort of sadistic tendencies I have, but I'm always drawn towards Fred-centric stories, even though his death was probably the one that hit me the hardest. I think you've done this scene - and his character - great justice here. Fred's always been the type to hold on to his childhood - he does have an obsession with pranks and he runs a joke store, after all, so it makes sense that he's in denial of his own death and still clings on to life. But he's also grown up so much throughout the books, and he eventually accepts his death and let's it happen.You did great with all of the other characters as well - they're all very true to canon, and I can definitely envision them all behaving that way.

Oh my gosh, there were so many strong emotions throughout this piece. Percy blaming himself, George holding Fred's body, and just everything Fred. You captured his desperation and confusion so well, and my heart just ached for him through the whole thing. I especially loved the part where Fred's calling out for his mother - it shows that he's still a child at heart, and just reminds the reader how young he really is on the inside. Normally, the wide spacing would be kind of weird, but I think it's actually a really great stylistic choice here - it creates a visual representation of Fred's warped senses.

I think you really did a great job here, capturing so many vivid emotions in such a short space. It was absolutely heartbreaking, in the very best way.

-ShadowRose (Taylor)

Author's Response: I have those same tendencies! XD

:3 Thank you so much for that lovely comment! :D I've been somewhat disappointed with this piece because I feel like it didn't come out the way I wanted it, but I'm so happy to see the impact it's had on people! :) Doing Fred justice is all I could ever ask for! I like how you delve into thinking of his youthful behavior and how much he's grown. :) it's so great to see that some things I wrote portray well! :D

I love breaking hearts! In all the best ways ;).

Thank you so much for this lovely review and for stopping by to read it in the first place! :D it makes me super duper happy to see readers have this sort of reaction! Thank you! :)

~Mae


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Review #2, by monstrosity Dying: A One Shot

2nd March 2014:
THE FEELS. Woah, that was heart shattering. I think I'm going to go cry in a dark room now.

I think Fred's death was possibly the worst of all deaths. He was so young with so much to live for. He had a twin, and experience has shown me that living without your twin is like living without your other half. Poor George. I cannot even express how sad this is.

I think the most tear jerking moment is when Fred wonders if his mother can fix this. It shows how young he still is. Percy's grief is almost palpable. To think that he actually got Fred to laugh only to watch him die the next second. I don't know how he can live with himself.

You've written this really well. The emotions sort of hit me in the face like a brick wall but I think that's exactly what a situation like this deserves. I am so mad at myself for reading such a beautifully tragic story that is sure to make me cry buckets but I would have been madder knowing that I missed reading such and amazing piece of work. I hope that made sense. Essentially this is awesome, you are awesome and I want to kill you for writing such a tear inducing story. Okay?

Author's Response: Go cry, monstrosity. Go cry! Muahahahahaha- *cackle**cough**splutter**choke*

*Ahem* I mean, I'm so sorry I made you cry! ;)

Seriously though, what an amazing feat and compliment! That's all I aim to do in writing stories like this! Really tuning into ya'lls emotional range.

Fred was the worst death! Him and Collin, but Fred because we knew him better, and he had a twin! :'( I'm writing a sequel one-shot to this about George ;) I might also edit this one a bit.

He is young! And he's a family boy. Mama fixes everything! I have a new love for Percy after that moment. I really do think he would have chaned.

Thank you so much! I love bringing out all sorts of emotions, and that you're happy with the emotions you felt ;). Haha, well can you kill me later? I have quite a few stories to finish! :D

Thanks again! This review made me smile and laugh and made me all giddy inside! I'm so happy you liked it! :D

~Mae


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Review #3, by love_is_magic_ Dying: A One Shot

2nd March 2014:
Wow, what a beautifully heartbreaking one-shot.

The way you went about telling this was extremely creative, what with the description of limbo and what he could or could not feel/hear.

I think my favourite (though most tragic) part was when Percy said it was his fault for distracting him. When I re-read DH, I sometimes wonder if Percy would ever think that, but I had never seen that addressed in a fic, so well done!

Overall, this was just such a beautiful fic and I thoroughly enjoyed reading it :D

Christy

Author's Response: Yay! I love hearing those exact words with this story! :D

Thank you! :) This is how I've always imagined limbo to be. Something that has no definitive meaning, making it that much harder for those who don't know they're dying to know where they are at. That way, they can get a little grasp on what's going on around them. So they can take it all in without freaking out.

I've always imagined it! I've had a couple reviews saying they never put this into view, but I've never seen him reacting any other way. It's tragic, but natural for him to feel that way. Thank you so much! :D

Yay! I'm glad you loved reading it! I loved writing it, at the time haha. :) Thanks for stopping by!

~Mae


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Review #4, by LilyEPotter Dying: A One Shot

1st March 2014:
Hi!

Another heart-breaking story. Again I had to go find some tissues. It's also so sad to think that Fred was still there trying to interact with his family until the very end and not understanding why they weren't able to hear him. To wake up in the white light had to be scary especially when the sound ricocheted like that. I didn't understand the transition back to being surrounded by his family, but it was another very touching moment where he was able to say good-bye to everyone and finally managed to speak to George. To have the choice of becoming a ghost and being able to see his family or continuing on, I suppose he chose to continue onwards as everything went black at the end.

Gryffindor vs. Slytherin Blackout Bingo
Review 7 of 10
LEP:)

Author's Response: I like the sadness, what can I say? ;)

I wanted a limbo type feel (that, and that's what the challenge at the time wanted). It was terrifying! I don't often dream of my stories, but I dreamed of this one. If you want your character to go through something intense, expect to dream about it! It's awful!

Sorry it was confusing! :(

I never imagined him wanting to be a ghost. Maybe a poltergeist, but not a ghost haha :).

Thanks for stopping by and choosing this one to read! One-shot loves! Yay! :3

~Mae


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Review #5, by Lululuna Dying: A One Shot

29th April 2013:
Hi!! :) This is a really beautifully written and unique piece, and I actually felt really upset and sad at the end even though I knew what was going to happen! But, I'll start at the beginning. I thought it was so interesting how you described Fred's death: how he can't believe it at first, and still feels like he's in his body although he can't move. I loved how he lost his vision first, and then his hearing: it gave the impression of slipping out of life and into death by degrees, and Fred's confusion and thoughts were really heartbreaking.

This line: "I have so much more to live for." is so simple but also perfect, and for me really tied the entire piece together. However, an idea could be to add in after that line, the things that Fred has to live for. You could say: "I have so much more to live for. I have a wicked jokeshop to run and I have to bring people laughter and I have to kiss my Mum and shake my Dad's hand and George. I have so much more to live for." Or something, I think that reminding the reader of these things and then repeating that amazing line would be really great, that's just an idea that popped into my head when I read it, though, so feel free to ignore it! :)

Aw, the part about Percy blaming himself was very believable. I loved how Fred said: "Merlin, don't let my death be the end of your joke telling either." That is just exactly what he would say, and you did a really good job of keeping him in character even in this most upsetting of circumstances. Fred's goodbyes to the rest of his family were also very lovely.

The one part I found a little confusing was Fred's new idea for a jokeshop product, but maybe that was just me. However, I think it would be really poignant if he had an idea and died without being able to tell George about it! Just a thought.

One of the most interesting parts of this piece is Fred's musings about becoming a ghost. I absolutley loved it and for a moment was kind of vying for him to become one, just because it would be so comforting for the family to see each other. It was cute how he thought about being at Hogwarts to spend time with his future nieces and nephews. But I think he made the right, balanced decision not to become a ghost: it wouldn't have been enough for our Freddy.

This line: "You can still see the laughter in them." Was really, really lovely, as was George's final "I Love you." *wipes stray tear from eye* The ending is so fitting and I really loved it. Well done on this one-shot, as you can tell I thought it was very well-written and thought-provoking, and I very much enjoyed it!:)

Author's Response: Aww, why thank you very much! :D I don't know if you've ever heard of it, but I desperately wanted to write a Fred dying piece after reading a story called Long Distance Extendable Ears (definitely something you should look up on it is that great). Is it a bad thing to say I'm glad I broke your heart? lol Anyway, I'm glad you found it very touching, and the going into further detail with how much more he has to live for is a sweet idea. I may go back and do that some time in the future. I was just focused on the timing sense of the piece at the moment I was writing it. :)

I'm really smiling at how canon you and everyone thinks Fred is. Not that I'm saying he's not, it's just humor has always been a problem for me to portray in writing, so it makes me happy that I can get his character down. Then again, it's in a sadder atmosphere, so they weren't uproariously entertaining jokes ;). I'm just glad everything agrees he's in character. :)

I was trying to go for the Peruvian Darkness gag they have, and have him toss the idea of his limbo to George. That way they could sell it to their enemies, but I'm thinking it may have ruined the flow a little bit. I don't get many comments on that aspect, so maybe I'll wait and see what others think about it in due time. Though I think Fred trying to give an idea out and dying just before he was able to would a) take out the beautiful ending it has now, and b) be a tad on the dramatic flare instead of the slow heartbreak we feel ;). Thanks for tossing the idea out there though!

I've never thought of him being a ghost, simply because he would eventually never see his family again, and that would (metaphorically) kill him once again when several hundred years started to pass. At least wherever he passes (not going to get religious or anything), he will meet with everyone again someday. :)

Thank you for reading and reviewing! I'm so glad you liked it and I hope that tear was real :p. lol It's definitely different compared to anything else I've done, and I really believe Fred and George are my favorite characters that aren't the main group of characters, so it was very fun, even if it was so sad, to write for the two of them here. :)


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Review #6, by Rew Dying: A One Shot

28th April 2013:
Interesting take on one of the most tragic scenes in the books. It's similar to Harry's time in limbo, yet very distinct. I like how he retrains his very Fred-like sense of humor, but communicates with each of his family members to press on without him, particularly George.

His being able to feel the sensations of people handling his body added an appropriately creepy dimension to the beginning of his time in the afterlife.

And finally, my favorite line (from before he's aware that he's dead): "What a pair my twin brother and I would make. Me blind and him partially deaf. The sympathy sales we would get at the shop!" Ha, that was perfect!

Author's Response: Yay! I'm glad you caught onto Harry's limbo here! :D In my mind, I think everyone has their own personal limbo. That's how Dumbledore made me think anyway. I wanted Fred's to be the vast emptiness because I like to say that Fred had so many places to go to that made him happy and that he loved living life at, that it was pretty difficult to choose. Also, because it added a bit more roughness to the story. ;)

One of my biggest goals in this story was to maintain his sense of humor so he could lose it, and then gain it once more once he accepted death. I didn't want anyone losing sight of such a great character who was always strong and funny. He had a moment of weakness in being scared, but even at death's door he pushed through.

That's one of my favorite lines, too! :) I feel like it caught the essence that he didn't know what knowledge was to come only minutes down the road. :)

Thank you for reading and reviewing! It made my day! Hope to possibly see you become active around here and the forums! :D Thanks again!


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Review #7, by Mihali1432 Dying: A One Shot

25th June 2012:
Aww. You wrote in the POV of Fred when he died... Alright, so this was sad. :( Although I thought your interpretation of Limbo was interesting, just white. A giant white echoy room. It was neat! The results will be out soon and I'm sorry for being so slow with this!

Mike.

Author's Response: Thanks for coming over to review! :) I honestly thought that you were finished and this one just didn't make the pickings. :) I'm glad you liked my idea of limbo, though. :) Thanks for coming over to read and review!

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Review #8, by charlottetrips Dying: A One Shot

24th April 2012:
Oh no. Aw, man. I should never read stories about Fred. They almost make me so emotional. I really like the approach you've taken with these stories. The way it was very stream-of-consciousness in Fred's thoughts.

Like for instance the part where after he's hit and when he's in the Great Hall. I can totally see someone being in an "in-between" place and still being aware of what's happening around them to some large degree. I think it would be comforting to most people who have loved ones die to think that they really do get a chance to say good-bye and their loved one would hear them.

The whole spacing approach and the running narrative were really interesting to read. Fred's denial and then following despair and then acceptance was nicely done in my opinion. It just seemed to flow right and seem real, though I haven't had personal experience in the after life.

By the by, you're my 500th review! XD

xChar

Author's Response: Oh my gosh! Thank you so much for the read and review (especially since it was your 500th review)! I was really beginning to wonder if this story was just terrible because of its lack of attention. I'm happy to hear that you found it easy to follow.

Oh, and I hope you don't have to experience the After Life for a very long time! lol

Thanks for the read and review! It means a lot to me! :)

~Mae


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