Reading Reviews for Perfectly Broken
  
5 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Ginny45 Nothing but.

25th August 2012:
Hi!
I was just reading that sentence I pointed out in the last review and don't change it. I think I read it wrong the first time around, it made perfect sense.

I enjoyed this just as much as the first. I really like her character, she isn't sugar-coated but she isn't as awful as everyone seems to think she is.
A few moments in this had me giggling a bit like her blowing up Susan's face.

I spotted a few mistakes here and there, nothing a read over wouldn't solve and failing that you could always get a beta over at the forums, they are really helpful.

I am really looking forward to seeing the repercussions of her actions and how she deals with everything that is being thrown at her. I have so many questions but I shall wait for further chapters!

Emma :)

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Review #2, by Ginny45 Wrong bed.

25th August 2012:
Hi!
This is really interesting. I have read my fair share of Sirius/OC stories and they are all either from his pov and there is a real lack of emotion or it is from her pov and she thinks that she is the one. He will stop looking at other girls for her and they will live happily ever after. Not that there is anything wrong with those but this is refreshing.

You said that English isn't your first language but I didn't notice that when I was reading it. In fact the structure of your sentences is excellent. There are a few sentences like this one:
"Sirius smiled down at me before lowering his head and started kissing my neck, feather light kisses, barely touching my skin."
I don't think that started is necessary for the sentence. It flows nicely without it.

Your characterisation is gorgeous. The internal argument is perfectly done in my opinion and is truly believable. I am really looking forward to the rest and I think I will go read that second chapter now. :)

Emma

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Review #3, by KMissouri Wrong bed.

8th May 2012:
I normally don't like Sirius/OC, just because everyone tends to make him this mysterious bad boy and only this girl can tame him blah, blah, blah...
However, I clicked on this one because, well, it drew me in. And I love that you made her faults so out in the open. I love that you didn't have her regret waking up next to him. I love that you didn't have his friends go all doe-eyed and pea-brained about it. It's just mature, its just accepted.
I'm rambling. I know, but I love this because it's just so truthful. Oh, and just from this chapter, I already sympathise with this character.

Author's Response: Thank you so much for your review, it mean loads to me to hear you say that! And I'm glad you sympathise with Dorcas, I know I do. I wanted to make her faults open, because I feel like a lot of stories out there, the main characters are just... blaah.. like with their perfect hair and perfect friendships with their perfect friends and never does anything wrong kind of thing. So I thought, let make someone with all faults and make it hard to see the good things about her instead of the opposite. Anyway, thanks again means loads

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Review #4, by claire Wrong bed.

22nd March 2012:
wow i really like this i was so dissapointed when i saw there was no more for me to read yet :P ill keep my eyes open for it though
i am enjoying dorcas she seems like the kind of girl i'd like to be friends with :) great story so far

Author's Response: I will update soon, so you don't have to be disappointed for much longer :P
And thanks for reading and reviewing! Means a lot to me! :D


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Review #5, by Siriusly3 Wrong bed.

19th March 2012:
I want more on it! It obviously breaks my heart to see Sirius with someone else (writing my own Sirius/OC atm! I like your pen name btw) but this totally pulls me in. And I love the way you write, the grammar's really good if english isn't your native language! 10/10!

Author's Response: Thank you so much for your review! It really warms my heart to hear you say that. And thank you for your review, it really made my day :D

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