Reading Reviews for Forever Young
  
13 Reviews Found

Review #1, by FredWeasleyIsMyKing Courage

6th January 2013:
Hello! Just me again :)

I love Fred Weasley (as you may have guessed from my name) and this just filled me up with lovely happiness as well as killing me at the same time!

I thought you did a great job of both Katie and Fred in this. I was wondering who you were going to have as the girl when you mentioned Quidditch and I was really glad you didn't go for Angelina! Not that I have got anything against the two of them but it was lovely to see something different!

I'm glad Katie took some initative and went to find him! It was really fun to read how nervous she was! It made me laugh when she was worried about going to his for dinner though - as though she wouldn't be invited to Molly Weasleys house bless her! I like how you got the motherly comment in there. Everything fit in perfectly :)

I loved the bit where she looked for the tell-tale sign to work out which twin she was talking to. I thought that was a lovely little detail.

All while I was reading this though and especially because you kept bringing up the whole 'it's a war, you never know what might happen tomorrow' I couldn't help but what was going to happen in the battle of Hogwarts. It really killed me when you were talking about Katie picturing marrying him! Gah - his death just left me heartbroken!

Anyway - I thought this was such a good start to the story and I'm really excited to read where you're going to go with it next!

Lauren

Author's Response: I would love to believe that Fred and Katie might have had something if life would have let them. I'm just so thrilled you like this! I'm really hoping to work on this story again soon because I do love it and think that we need more fred stories. I'm glad you liked the detail of looking for which weasley is which. Thanks so much for the read and review!

~Slytherinchica08~


 Report Review

Review #2, by academica Courage

22nd August 2012:
Hello! Here from Review Tag :)

I think this is a really cute start to a story! It's too bad, assuming that you're going by canon, to know that it won't end well :( I like your characterization a lot, although I did find it a little strange that Katie was already thinking of marrying Fred before they could even have a first date. It was nice to see Angelina and George playing around here, too.

Nice job! Looks like the start to a good fic!

-Amanda

Author's Response: Oh Amanda how I do like getting reviews from you! Yes this is a rather sad story but I am really excited about it though I have been busy with so many other storys that I haven't had time to work on this one which I really should! Maybe I will again soon! I'm glad you enjoyed the characterization. The whole bit of Katie thinking about marrying Fred is kindof like wishful thinking. She's been crushing on him for a while and would like to see her dreams come true of being able to be with him and so marrying him is what she is wishing for. Yes i wanted to add in Angelina and George into the mix as well as George is a huge part of Fred's life obviously so it wouldn't make sense to not have them in the story. Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review!

~Slytherinchica08~


 Report Review

Review #3, by Jchrissy Courage

22nd June 2012:
Here from review swap! Sorry I had a bit of an emergency that I needed to take care !

Your characterization of Fred was perfect! It was so cool to see everything from his POV and see his reactions to these situations. I think you gave him his own personality but still kept him our Canon Fred, it was absolutely great!

He was just absolutely great around.

I like Angelina and George's place in this also, it's so nice to get a look inside their characters and have that extra level involved in this chapter!

Katie was so sweet and perfect! She was believable, real, and an amazing counterpart to Fred!


It's so sad and happy at the same time for me to read stories about Fred where he is still living. It reminds me of how much I love this red headed person, and then I always feel that stab of pain remembering him die.

Ahh. Now you have me emotional.

Great one shot!!

Author's Response: Wow I'm so glad that you liked my version of Fred, personally writing Fred and George scares me because they are such jokers and I haven't dabbled much in writing funny stories so this will be a bit of a challenge but I'm glad that you like how its turned out so far! I didn't want the story to just be about Fred and Katie, while they are my main characters, George and Angelina will be around a lot as well, as Fred and George are almost inseperable. I do hope that you continue reading as I post more chapters which should hopefully be soonish! I have the start of the second chapter already, I've just gotten sidetracked by new WIPs. Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review!

~Slytherinchica08~


 Report Review

Review #4, by StormThief17 Courage

9th June 2012:
I really like this chapter! It is very smoothly written and easy to read. I really love the way Katie thinks, it is very realistic! It makes me really sad about Fred though :( Especially when she says there's no garauntee they'll both make it out of the war. But is was a really well done chapter and I can't wait to see more!

Author's Response: Oh thank you so much! I really enjoyed writing the first chapter of this story and have a start of the second chapter, I just keep getting sidetracked by new stories to finish the second chapter but hopefully I will have it up soon! Thank you so much for reaading and I'm really glad that you liked it!

~Slytherinchica08~


 Report Review

Review #5, by Beeezie Courage

16th April 2012:
Hey, this is Beeezie, here with your review!

A couple comments about plausibility first:

First off, I had a bit of a hard time with your portrayal of Katie as having had a crush on Fred since her second year. In my experience, most crushes people get when they're twelve or thirteen, especially on people they don't know very well, tend not to last for seven or eight years, especially when they've gone unrequited for that long. That's not to say that it never, ever happens, but it would have felt more realistic to me if she'd developed feelings a little later, or if she'd had feelings on and off for him, rather than just the strong, continuous attraction you're describing. Just my opinion, and I know that a lot of people disagree and like that sort of thing.

Similarly, the idea that Katie stared at him for five minutes seemed a little unlikely. Five minutes is a really, really long time to sit there and stare at someone, especially without them saying something about it. A minute or two would have gotten the awkward silence across without making it seem ridiculous. As a point of comparison, you did an excellent job of this when Joker returned with the letter - you let Katie's hesitance drag on just long enough that I felt myself get pulled into her feelings in that moment. I would have liked to see something similar in place of the "five minutes" thing.

Additionally, the idea that Fred and George are bad with their finances struck me as a little strange - everything we ever saw of them in the books indicated that they were very good with finances. I'm glad that you had Angelina come in, but I would have liked to see a different reason behind it.

Again, these are all pretty minor issues, but by the same token, they're not hard to change, and for me, at least, the more realistic a story is, the more I get sucked into it and want to keep on reading.


Aside from that, though, I think you did a good job!

Your characterisation of Fred was great. I felt like you took the canon Fred that we all knew and loved and put your own little spin on him to show what he might be like in this situation. Since the books were from Harry's pov, we never really saw how Fred might react to a girl asking him out, nor did we ever see what Fred might look like from the point of view of someone who has feelings for him. You were definitely covering new territory - and I absolutely, 100% believed it.

There were a lot of things that made him very believably Fred. I loved the way he jokingly bowed to her, and the fact that he took her offer in stride. That fits in so well with the bit of Fred we saw in Goblet of Fire, where he just nonchalantly asks Angelina to the Yule Ball. A lot of people would have just said, "Sorry, I have a family dinner tonight, how about tomorrow?" - but once I thought about it for a minute, I decided that you were right - Fred probably would jump to "Come over for family dinner" instead.

He was just really excellent all around.

I also really liked the fact that you've already established Angelina and George as couple-ish before Fred dies - it's obviously perfectly reasonable to not have it happen until after the war, or to have her be with Fred before he dies, but I liked this, too. I felt like it really added an extra layer to the chapter and gave both George and Angelina depth, rather than just having them there to take up space, and you used it to remind readers of the war without really dwelling on it just yet.

Which brings me to Katie.

I don't think that there's really a wrong way to characterise Katie (within reason, of course - she's not a scheming blood purist or anything), but I will say that I liked the way you did it here. As I mentioned above, I felt that you went a bit overboard at times, but on the whole, she was great. She was nervous and hesitant, but not overly so - I could definitely tell that while she was slightly uncomfortable asking him out, Fred was certainly a friend who she was generally fairly comfortable with.

What really made Katie great for me were a lot of the little touches. Toward the beginning, Katie's not sure which Weasley she's looking at, but after a moment, she realises that it's George from his smile. Given that their own mother sometimes can't tell them apart, I liked her moment of confusion and the specific trait you identified as telling her who it was.

Speaking of Mrs. Weasley, I also liked the touch of having Katie wait around for Mrs. Weasley's response and not immediately being convinced that it'll be okay for her to come. Katie never really had the opportunity to get to know Molly, so of course she wouldn't know how welcoming Molly is to most people, and it makes sense that she wouldn't just take Fred on his word.

So, yeah. Nice characterisation all around. My only issue with it was that I did feel that you could have done a little more to make Katie stand out as a character - she was well done, but she wasn't especially compelling or unique, and I didn't feel like I really got into her head as much as I would have liked. I think that part of that was that we really only saw her thoughts about and reactions to Fred - if you'd included just a few more thoughts here and there about the war, or her job, or her friends (or whatever), or a bit more of a reaction to the products in the shop, that would have worked better to me.

I also felt like you could have included a bit more detail about the shop. What does it look like? Who's in there? What products is Katie looking at? Has she used any before? I mean, you don't need to answer all or even most of those questions, I just would have liked a little more to help bring the chapter to life.

On the whole, though, nice job. :)

I've exceeded the character limit, so I'll PM you the part I cut out. I hope you find this helpful, and please feel free to rerequest! :)

Author's Response: First off let me just say WOW thats quite a review! Your advice is great and I hope to go back through the chapter and fix that and make the time frame more realistic! Honestly even though the series seems like they might be good with their finances I figured that while they had never really had money that maybe once they did they might have a tougher time keeping track of it with buying so many supplies and such. I'm so glad that you like my Katie and Fred especially since I've never tried writing Fred before! Really words can't describe how thankful I am for you to come by and leave this amazing review! but Thank You!

~Slytherinchica08~


 Report Review

Review #6, by Siriusly3 Courage

5th April 2012:
This is really sweet, I dread him dying (unless this is an AU where he never dies!!:D) Her thoughts about marriage are a teensy bit far-fetched but understandable what with the war and all. A really great start, can't wait until the next chapter. I think this flowed really well, Katie's character isn't very developed yet but it will obviously come through more later, Fred and George are well played out and I like the glimpse at Fred and Angelina's relationship. All in all a promising start :)

Author's Response: I'm really glad that you liked this chapter! I have her picturing this marriage not only because of the war but also because she has liked him for ages so its not like she just started liking him and is already picturing this. I think most girls will start picturing their wedding even when they aren't with anyone. yeah I hope to have Katie's character more developed in the next chapter and such. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!

~Slytherinchica08~


 Report Review

Review #7, by alicia and anne Courage

2nd April 2012:
This is a really good start to the story, I love Katie and Fred together and they seem quite cute. Angelina and George are quite cute as well aren't they? :-D
You wrote this really well and I really enjoyed reading it.
I can't wait to read more of this story :-D

Author's Response: Oh I'm so glad you like this story! I'm about halfway done with chapter two so hopefully you wont have to wait much longer for the next one! I absolutely love Katie with Fred and George with Angelina!Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!

~Slytherinchica08~


 Report Review

Review #8, by LunarLuna Courage

29th March 2012:
Hey it's me, here with your review swap!!^^

So first off I just want to say that usually, I hate Hogwarts era and really think it should be left to JK only, but this is super sweet^^ I swear it's the first Hogwarts era I've read that made me want to read on. Granted I haven't read much, bit STILL. xD I think you did a great job characterizing Fred and Katie was interesting, I'd never viewed her like that but I can definately see it working :)

I loved that little bit of George/Angelina. So cute!! :D

It makes me kinda sad reading this though, since we all know what happens to Fred in the end :'(

Nevertheless, it was really good! :D

-June

Author's Response: I'm really glad that you like this chapter and find it sweet even though you dont usually read hogwarts era stuff. thank you so much for the compliments about fred,katie, george, and angelina! Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!

~Slytherinchica08~


 Report Review

Review #9, by daliha Courage

22nd March 2012:
This was soo sweet! I loved how you gave us information on Katie. Her feelings for Fred are realistic and sweet (especially since she can't tell who's who from afar.)

I was a bit nervous there when she was asking him out, I've never been in that position myself but I can only imagine how embarrassing it must be. Also I loved how you had Angelina and George in the background. :) (I'm happy you liked the title)

Author's Response: I loved the title and have an idea on how i can tie the title into the actual story! so I was super excited about that and that was the deciding factor in picking that as my title! I'm really glad you like the story and my katie and fred I was really nervous since i've never attempted either! Thank you for reading and reviewing!

~Slytherinchica08~


 Report Review

Review #10, by forsakenphoenix Courage

22nd March 2012:
This was so sweet, but with a hint of something sad lingering on the edges. I think you did a really great job with Katie, here. You give us enough background from their younger years to see how her infatuation for Fred grew and you can tell that she's held a torch for him for a while. She speaks of him so fondly.

I actually really liked that you made it so she couldn't tell which twin was which from far away. It made it more realistic for me, I guess, rather than you saying she knew it was him right away because she was so in love with him, you know? But then George smiled and she could tell it was George. It was such a nice little detail.

You had my heart racing when Katie asked Fred to dinner. I was just waiting in anticipation for his response and then you had them just staring at each other - it drove me nuts! But then I could tell he was going to let her down, and I felt really disappointed until he invited her to his family's dinner.

I found her daydreaming about their wedding to be amusing, and so girlish. I also really enjoyed the contrast between Katie and Angelina, how one thinks that no time should be wasted and the other wants to wait until the war is over to pursue anything. It just makes my heart ache to think that Fred's the one not coming home in the end and so Katie was right to not waste any time.

Fred was great too. Eager and funny, but still sincere. I loved his little quip about his and George's best behavior being playing pranks -that just made me smile.

I'm amused that Jane read both our stories - she does a fabulous job, doesn't she? This was really great. Very well-written and like I said before, sweet. I enjoyed it a lot.

Author's Response: This review totally made my day! Sadness is definately lingering on the edges for this couple and story. Oh you like my Katie! this makes me so happy! yeah I got help on the forums about twins and such and that was one thing someone said was that they do have small differences in like smiles or something and honestly i can't tell which twin is which! so I wanted to add that in there that from a difference she couldnt really tell which one was which.

I really wanted to show this difference between the two girls as some people do think that war means action you never know who will be around the next day so you need to do now what you can and then others who will push stuff off such as weddings etc. I'm glad you like my fred as well! Thank you so much for the kind words and for reading and reviewing!

~Slytherinchica08~


 Report Review

Review #11, by lizmusic45 Courage

22nd March 2012:
Oh I always liked the idea of Katie and Fred, I don't know it just seemed to fit the both of them, but for some reason when someone says Katie Bell I'm like oh yea that blonde girl from the first three movies or something like that...I'm weird.

I loved this though, I thought it was great, I thought it was funny and creative, and new, and your writing talent is brilliant and amazing and you never fail to impress me while I'm reading. I thought this was cute and sweet and extremely enjoyable.

Lizzie

Author's Response: Yeah there is something about this couple that appeals to me and makes me want to write their story even though i've never read or attempted them before! I'm so glad you enjoyed this chapter and that you thought it was funny and creative! You like my writing!? Oh thats probably the nicest thing anyone has said! Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!

~slytherinchica08~


 Report Review

Review #12, by MoonMarauder Courage

19th March 2012:
Hello :)
This was lovely. I could relate to Katie's experience so much, I mean what girl can't relate to that. I loved the way you wrote her too, it was perfect.
It was a great chapter, keep up the good work :)

Jen :) x

Author's Response: I'm so glad you felt you could relate to her and that you like the way i wrote her it makes me super happy! Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!

~Slytherinchica08~


 Report Review

Review #13, by SexyDoorFrames Courage

19th March 2012:
Hey. I thought this was an excellent opening chapter, it was really good! I really like the way you've wrote Katie. Her plight with asking a boy that they really like for the first time, is something every girl can relate too. Also the stuff with Angelina and George in the background was really sweet. Fred was also written really well. I like your writing style, it flowed really well and I couldn't pick up on any errors. I really loved reading this, thanks for a wonderful read!

Author's Response: I'm so glad that you enjoyed my Katie, Fred, Angelina, and George! The other two will be in the background quite a bit throughout the story. I'm so glad that you enjoyed my writing style as well! Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!

~slytherinchica08~


 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login