well since you said reviews are welcome,
i suggest you not put "hehe" in your story because its just weird, could you make the things that they are saying separate from the paragraph because its confusing, and could you make the story longer? thanks. good chapter. and you use "freakin" to much.
your sister.Author's Response: cuz can. its not an acting darling sister, nor is it a script, but i try to make it obvious who says what and so on. but thats cool. bask in its glory sister. bask
~P_A_P Report Review
I had to read this since I saw a mention of Petunia. She's so underappreciated so I'm glad to see a new fic about her.
I think the plot definitely seems interesting. I find Lily a bit immature, though. I think James is well done.
There are some grammatical/spelling/formatting mistakes that should probably be fixed, unfortunately. The one thing that gets me is capitalization. Please capitalize I, names, and the beginnings of sentences.
Don't take my critisism too harshly! It's just some constructive critisism to try to help. I really like the plot and idea of this fic. It is good!Author's Response: thanks! I know i have bad capitalization and spelling but i try to work on them.
I agree that Lily is immature, but as the story progresses hopefully she'll be more mature.
on the James part, I'm really satisfied by him. I don't know why though. I greatly enjoyed your review, and your criticism it helps alot.
-P_A_P Report Review
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