Reading Reviews for Daydream
  
4 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Claw Secret Santa Daydream

28th December 2012:
AH! That was just…that was just awesome. From those first few sentences to the end, that was just amazing. Seriously, those first few lines instantly drew me in and I just couldn’t stop reading. I had to keep going. And the words, the sentences…I’m not sure if it was intentional or not but they had a pattern or a rhythm to them and it just added to how easy it was to keep reading. It was just…I was in awe the entire time.

I also adore the characterization of William and Molly. Because William was this thoughtful guy and just everything in his mind was so awesome. He observed such small details and was so easily distracted…he honestly reminded me a bit of Luna. He had that airy feel to his voice and just…between him and Molly, who also seemed to be this light character, full of hope and everything good, it was just amazing.

I also like how the beginning, middle, and end all connect. I mean, it starts with thinking about the kiss, which ties into the middle where he kisses her after his day dream which ends the entire thing because his day dream comes true. Like seriously, it made the flow and the whole feel of the story even better.

And I realize all I have here is compliments but this seriously was awesome. I adored every part of it and have no complaints! Great job!

-The ‘Claw Claus

P.S. This review is for the first gift! I apologize immensely for how late this one, along with the three others are. I don’t know where my brain was but I was smart enough to save these reviews in a word document and not actually post them online after I finished them and I only just discovered this yesterday. So huge apologies for that! xD

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Review #2, by maskedmuggle Daydream

12th February 2012:
Awww this is so adorable! That rain charm where everything except Molly got wet was seriously so sweet, and such a great idea! I liked the whole fic, it was just a lovely read. I liked the mention of pie, the daydreams, the way you characterised Molly and William as well. William definitely sounds like such a nice guy :P

Thank you for taking the time to write this! It's definitely a lovely fluffy one shot, nicely written :)

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Review #3, by NextGenna14 Daydream

10th February 2012:
Aww this was so cute! :)

Author's Response: Glad you liked it! :)

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Review #4, by long_live_luna_bellatrix Daydream

10th February 2012:
This was really cute. I guess I haven't read too much fluff recently, but I still enjoyed it. Perhaps my favorite aspect was how you got the classic kiss in the rain to be, well, not so classic. :P It was sweet and quite original and both your characters were very likable.

You tied the whole thing together nicely with the bit about the daydreams, at the beginning and end. It gave the whole thing a nice, finished feel to it. And the pie comment was brilliant as well, since the reader didn't miss a beat but if you weren't in the main character's head then it would sound absolutely ridiculous.

The whole thing was relatable as well. We've all had those daydreams of the perfect moment with the perfect person, and often those are during inconvenient times such as school. So when Stephen started wriggling his fingers and your main character decided he meant rain, my heart went out to him. Out of curiosity, what did Stephen actually mean?

The only thing I can possibly think of that may have needed work were tiny bits of your wording. The sentence I'm thinking of in particular is, "I could nearly see the light on the lake again, when my name being said called me abruptly back. " Placing "said" and "called" next to each other is a little awkward, so rearranging that might make it sound better. Even "I was called abruptly back when I heard my name" would do it. And there were other absolutely minuscule things, like "The golden tipped waves lapped" might sound better with one less syllable, such as "The gold-tipped waves lapped."

It was a sweet read, overall. Well done. :D

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