This was simply beautiful!!! I loved the nostalgic, loving and eloquent tone of Hermione's voice, it reads almost like a lullaby. You have a very lovely style of description that flowed so naturally, and it was a pleasure to read. The use of long, flowing sentences to represent the continuation and drawn out birth mixed with short sentences really pacts impact and sets up the story so nicely.
"The hours I spent holding you, rocking you, singing you to sleep in my arms and yet I still could not decide what name to give you, how to name the mystical rain child that slipped into our lives one dark November day. Your dark blue eyes stared accusingly up at me- what name could be good enough for such a being? What name did justice to the half-moon dimples in your cheeks? To the growing amount of sunlit hair, which I could already tell would one day be just as bushy as mine had always been?"
This, was truly lovely. The adoration and fascination Hermione has with her daughter really comes across, and I loved how she found characteristics of herself-like her hair-in her child. I think that the wonder of the whole experience really seems believable for a parent with their firstborn.
I'm glad that Hermione's mother got to redeem herself as a namer of babies by coming up with the name Rose. ("Hermione?" Really, Mrs. Granger?) The details about Hermione's parents feeling a little out of place in the magical world fit very well with my idea of them in canon, as well. :)
The last two paragraphs were stunning as well. They summed up the whole lovely little story so well, and made me feel rather nostalgic! "The world will take what it can from you, but those moments, Rose, those moments will always be ours." Simply beautiful. You should be really proud of your writing in this story, I absolutely adored it! :) Report Review
Wow, this was such a beautiful and poetic description of a mother's love for her little girl. You have definitely captured it well, it was extremely touching with beautiful descriptions throughout, and Hermione's deep love for Rose was evident all the way through the story. I love the fact that it's directed towards Rose; it adds a uniqueness to it, and it's quite hard to write like that, so congratulations on succeeding! I do not have any children myself, so who am I really to say it, but I still found it very believable, and I hope I'll have a little girl one day so I can experience this ;) I also really liked the fact that Hermione's parents couldn't come up with a name for her either. That comment: "And then you came up with Hermione?" made me laugh :D
I'd like to comment on just one thing though. Since this story is written from Hermione's POV to Rose, I think it would fit better if you didn't refer to Ron as Ron but as Dad, to Molly as Grandma Molly and Ginny as Aunt Ginny, etc. I think it would fit better, but of course, it's up to you! :)
Brilliant job on this! I was very moved by it, and it really just made me want to run over to my own mum and hug her and tell her how much I love her, haha! ;) Report Review
Hey! Here for the review swap (review number one).
Aw this was such a sweet one-shot. I absolutely loved the purity of it. You really expressed a mother's love beautifully through your narrative.
Hermione and Ron seemed very much in character though grown up, and I liked that. I also liked the idea of Hermione's mother coming up with the name 'Rose'. The way Hermione described her daughter's beauty was also amazing.
Your descriptions were just superb and really drew me in. It's not often that I enjoy second person narratives but I definitely enjoyed this one. It brought a sweet smile to my face.
(AditiDraco95)Author's Response: Hello!
Aww I'm glad that you enjoyed this! Hermione's love for Rose is pretty much what holds this up, so it's great to hear that it came through well :)
You wouldn't believe how great it is to hear that the adult Hermione and Ron seem in character. I really wanted to do them justice- especially Ron- but it's always a bit nerve-wracking trying to re-create the Trio!
I've always thought that Hermione's parents don't get much of a look-in in the books, so I thought it would be nice if they gained that connection to their daughter and granddaughter :)
It's so good to hear that I made you smile- especially if your not normally a fan of second person narratives! Thanks for such a lovely review!
-Bethany Report Review
Oh my god. Are you sure your not a poet in disguise? This is one of the most amazing pieces I have ever read. The one thing that I would change is it was a bit sudden when Hermiome's Mother suggested Rose. I don't know why, but it just seemed really sudden to me.
Overall, this was a super emotional piece. It was just fantastic.
-katty01/ginnys twinAuthor's Response: Aww you're way too nice to me :P This made me so happy to read!
I wanted to include Hermione's mother, as we see so little of her in the books, and I thought that Rose would be a way they could connect, but maybe her suggestion does happen a little suddenly... I'll go and have a re-read!
Thanks again for such an sweet review :)
-Bethany Report Review
Hello there Iím here with the first of your eight reviews!
I donít think I have quite recovered from the cuteness of it all. I donít think I have ever read something quite as adorable as this one-shot. The mother-daughter relationship is so rarely explored in fan fiction but after reading this it makes me want to read more!
I loved how you described how Rose came into the world first with the gentle kick, and for it to then turn out more serious. It seemed so Hermione like to not even care how serious the birth was, as everything was alright in the end, and she got her Rose. I loved Ronís reaction to the whole birthing scene too.
The way you portrayed the Weasley family was great too, and it seemed perfectly in character. I think one my favourite bits about that was the mention of Fleur, and how her views had changed towards her. It just showed how much motherhood could you change you, and how it almost softens you and allows you to accept different things.
Hermioneís parentsí reaction to Rose being born seemed perfect too. The way they were a little wary at first, but then came to terms with it. I never thought about how Rose would have been named, but it seemed right that Hermioneís mum may have had some input into the decision.
I thought this was a wonderful one-shot. I think the key reason why it worked so well was that Hermioneís love for Rose never seemed to fail, and it always seemed to be there. It was just so pure and innocent, much like a baby really!
-Kiana :DAuthor's Response: Why hello!
For some reason I'm obsessed with stories about mothers and daughters (well families in generally, actually) and seeing as I adore Hermione, I really wanted to write about her and Rose.
I'm so glad that you liked Ron in this. I found him quite difficult to write, and really wanted to do him justice, even though he's not such a main character here!
I've always thought that Hermione's parents are sort of sidelined in the books, and though I can see why JKR did it, I think that Hermione having a baby is the kind of thing they'd definitely want to be involved in. I liked the idea of Hermione's mother coming up with Rose's name as it kind of continues the mother/daughter thing...
It's wonderful to hear that you enjoyed this, and it's brilliant that Hermione's love came through consistently! Thanks for a lovely review :)
-Bethany Report Review
Wow. This was really amzing. I'm crying with happiness if that makes sence. I'm also sitting here with a big smile on my face.
Right from the first sentece I knew it would be amzing. Your amazing at writing. It's the sort of stories I like to write but I would never be able to write one nearly as half as good as you!
I especially liked 'It was raining; hard, cold rain pelting down from the blank-eyed iron stare of the November sky, causing the people to rush by, collars turned up against the wind, heads bowed to shield their faces from the downpour.' It was a brilliant start to the story and really got me intrigued.
I would have to quote back your whole story if I was to pick out my favourite quotes!
10/10 and a definite add to favourites.
Well done and thank you for a excellent read!
PS Could you please, please leave a review for my story 'Tear Drops'? Thanks!Author's Response: Aw this actually made my day!! Thankyou so much for all your kind comments and your rating- I'm really glad that you enjoyed reading it!!
PS Sure, I will have a look at it now :) Report Review
That was beautiful!!!
Its so sweet im just sitting here smiling :))) awww :')Author's Response: Thankyou so much!! I makes me so happy that I made you smile :P Report Review
Ah! This is absolutely adorable!Author's Response: Thankyouu!! Report Review
This is so sweet! Thanks so much for a great read :)Author's Response: Why, thankyou very much for a great response! :) Report Review
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