that poor girl...all she wanted was the toilet...
great story, i realy liked it. Report Review
Hi there, this is SapphireatDawn from the forums with your review. Iím so sorry itís so shockingly late.
I did quite like this. To be honest, your characterisation of Slytherin doesnít go against Rowlingís at all. We only hear the bad things about Slytherin and I donít think itís an unbelievable idea to have him fall in love with someone, in fact, Iíve seen several stories that feature this pairing. Also, youíve got Margaret noting that heís a foreboding man and that people are scared of him, which I think sufficiently links him to the figure we hear about in the series. It doesnít feel odd at all.
I think at times the era sort of slipped away from you, which I donít blame you for at all. I think for most people, the sort of society they would have lived in is incredibly incomprehensible. The name Margaret wouldnít have been common for anyone other than royalty or nobility who had connections to the continent. This all takes place before the Norman Conquest, and the Anglo-Saxons or the Danes are on the throne, so itís more likely that the original students of Hogwarts had Anglo-Saxon names. There were also a few phrases, such as Ďor so help me-Ď that were a little too modern. These things are very nitpicky though, and I donít blame you for ignoring me completely here.
One thing I would say about this story, though, is that the ending is fairly abrupt. The words you use at the beginning sort of gives the idea that thereís going to be conflict and scandal in the fic, and that doesnít happen. Salazar and Helga just have a bit of a kiss in the rain, so it felt a little anti-climatic.
However, this was a very sweet little story, and I liked the use of a Hogwarts student telling the story. Itís not something Iíve seen before and I felt it added an interesting perspective to things. Report Review
Terms of Service
categories & genres
short story collection