Our website is made possible by displaying online advertisements to our visitors.
Please consider supporting us by disabling your ad blocker.





  
14 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Cavell Partners in Family Vandalism by manno_malfoy

11th March 2012:
You wrote this beautifully, and I loved Andromeda and Sirius - there's something like elegance and grace in the way you wrote this, and I loved it. The characters were real and portrayed like actual human beings, and I really enjoyed reading this wonderful story.

 Report Review

Review #2, by shadowcat2 Just George by AC_rules

29th January 2012:
Honestly, i have no words. I have a lot of stories of George after Fred died. All of them made me cried. But your story totally caught me off guard. It was beautiful. It was sad. It hurt. But most importantly, it was real. I suppose this is writing. There were so many lines that touched my heart. I almost cried and then some of the lines made me smile instead. Am not sure how you do this, but this was a masterpiece.

 Report Review

Review #3, by pink_rook Phoenix Flames by DracoFerret11

28th January 2012:
I loved this entry. Focusing on friendship was an obvious choice for this prompt, but you managed to write a very original take on the subject. :) I enjoyed very much the different levels of relationships in this story - Albus and Fawkes and Albus and Grindelwald - and the way you have mixed them. I liked the way you gave Fawkes such human feelings in the last part, it was really touching. We knew that he had them, when he went to help Harry in CoS, but these were much more profound. It's an awesome contribution to this year's Writer's Duel. :)

 Report Review

Review #4, by pink_rook Charon's Obol by GubraithianFire

28th January 2012:
This story is very well written and I especially enjoyed the title (I am getting a Master's degree in Classics so I am a sucker of all classical references :) ) and the way you interpreted the prompt.

I liked the way you described Scorpius' relationship with his mother (and, indirectly, father) with all little memories instead of using massive flashback, as I often see in other fanfictions. And I loved how she is not such a perfect mother, as the final sentences conveys (at least, the way I understand it, but I admit it left me a little baffled on the spot!). With just a few words, you managed to overshadow her whole personality and build a contradictory character, which is not something a lot of writers can do. It was an outstanding intuition. :)

 Report Review

Review #5, by pink_rook Never Let Me Go by In The Shadows I Dwell

28th January 2012:
This story is very original. I've never even though about what could have happened to the Aurors guarding Azkaban prison when there was the mass breakout, but after reading this, it makes sense to me that there must have been some casualties between the Aurors. I like the way you interpreted this prompt and explored the relationship between working partners like Aurors, who must look at each other's back.

You described the scene so vividly I could actually picture it in my mind. I loved how you paid attention to the small details of their surroundings and their body reactions. Everything flowed so well then when I came to the end I suddenly wanted to know more about this two characters' past. This story is a wonderful stand-alone, but would have been equally perfect as a prologue of a longer story, just like the pilot episode of a TV series. You did a wonderful job. :)

 Report Review

Review #6, by pink_rook My Existence by rj_sunshine

28th January 2012:
This story moved me so much. I cried when I first read it before posting it and I'm shedding a tear now, rereading it. I can't even express how much I think this is unique and wonderful... The climax you managed to build was extremely intense and your final sentence was absolutely perfect.

We know the other side of the story, but I haven't seen many authors focusing on Merope and this is by far the best attempt to capture her point of view I've read. I absolutely loved your story.

 Report Review

Review #7, by pink_rook My Best Days by TheHeirOfSlytherin

28th January 2012:
I loved how you explored the father/daughter relationship and Rose/Scorpius is one of my favourite pairings :) Even though romance was not to be the main focus of this prompt, I like the way you put it in... I could feel love all over the place :) And I loved your characterization of adult Ron, a little less impulsive, more calm and collected, but still so... him. You managed to describe his feelings towards his daughter with truthfulness. All in all, this story was a great addition to this Writer's Duel and a great reading experience. Keep up with the good work :)

 Report Review

Review #8, by Hippothestrowl Only Adventures by gingersnape

19th January 2012:
A good attempt to get inside Luna's head but she does seem somewhat distant even from her mother. So I don't feel the full depth of that relationship that I expected. Still a very interesting new viewpoint. Luna doesn't seem to be too lonely - but she does seem to be alone and maybe that captures the character in a way.

It's good to include the start of Hogwarts. That gives us an anchor to relate the rest of it to. Otherwise that would be in a void. There is new promise and a new life - and a new adventure. Yes, in the end I think I like it.

 Report Review

Review #9, by Hippothestrowl Through a Mother's Eyes by megaaan

19th January 2012:
Excellent and a good place to finish. I always thought it immensely poignant in the book and even more in the movie when their memories are wiped - almost like Hermione's dead only worse.

Nicely fits the prompt theme and we get a good insight into Mrs. Granger's thinking. It helps a lot that the story is anchored in a character we all know well - Hermione. It's also intriguing in that it makes us think just how much Hermione would want to tell her muggle parents. I never thought about that before.

A minor technical flaw that broke my immersion was when McGonagall was at the door. To see 'an older witch' implies Mrs. Granger is familiar with witches and the magical world (plus older than who? - elderly or old witch is better.) Much more correct would have been eg, a strange old woman dressed like a fairytale witch.

Good story from another viewpoint. Enjoyable.

 Report Review

Review #10, by Hippothestrowl His World by StEpH_M

19th January 2012:
This is a new twist: a Death Eater with a heart. Definitely fits the prompt theme. Little is known of Nott so it could well be true within the Potter universe. Rather too unsubtle and over the top with the 'perfect', 'gorgeous' sister and the 'biggest hug in the world' but the story kind of works. Nice idea though tragic. I wanted a happy ending but it's likely Nott ended up in Azkaban after the Battle of Hogwarts. At least there were no Dementors anymore.

 Report Review

Review #11, by Hippothestrowl Inseparable by MagicalInk

18th January 2012:
Some rough edges in the grammar and choice of words, typos etc but it's a good, likeable story. I particularly liked the idea of being able to do magic in front of the dog without problems - the dog just accepts it whereas muggles are suspicious. That's a real friend and that fits the prompt theme nicely.

 Report Review

Review #12, by Hippothestrowl Charon's Obol by GubraithianFire

17th January 2012:
Well written. Interesting. Believable. Depressing. Certainly fits the prompt theme. Like several of these short stories I think it would have been better as part of a bigger story eg, Drama. Humour. Warmth. Immersion in the characters' lives leading to tragedy then this chapter.

 Report Review

Review #13, by Hippothestrowl Phoenix Flames by DracoFerret11

16th January 2012:
Excellent. Maybe a few too many tears per square paragraph but still nicely written and complements the original fiction as well as fulfilling the current prompt theme.

 Report Review

Review #14, by Hippothestrowl Loving Lovegoods by The Claw of Raven

16th January 2012:
Some good ideas here but for me it would have been better if Arthur and Bill had worked hard to persuade Xeno instead of using Death Eater tactics (I hate to think what curse they used to get him to sign his name.) After all, Xeno was already torn two ways so with pressure both from Luna and now the Weasleys might have swayed him in the direction of publishing - even if he regretted it ten minutes later.

But regarding the theme prompt itself, Xeno seemed to spend too much time curled up on the floor. I think some more subtle description of his inner anguish could have conveyed the relationship more expressively and believably. Yet it does work as it is to carry the theme but I don't think it would need much more tweaking to make it far better.

 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login