Reading Reviews for Triangles
  
2 Reviews Found

Review #1, by WitnesstoitAll Memories and Wolves

28th December 2011:
Hello!

This was an interesting start!! I'm not much of a werewolf-fic fan, so I'm not sure how original this is or whatever, but stylistically, it seemed to flow very well. The flashback was very well incorporated into the narrative of the chapter. I do think that this chapter has a lot of potential to be better if little things like the formatting are fixed. Please, don't feel down about this... the formatting was just a little untradditional. Typically the indented paragraphs are a little jarring for the reader. The only other critique I have is that it may prove beneficial to have a beta read over this. There are a few places where the tenses of your verbs shift. Other than that, this was a good first chapter. Your MC's emotions were accessible and presented well. Your introduction of zoi was executed well too. You may have hinted a bit too strongly that zoi is most likely a child animagus, but then again it may not be meant to be a mystery.

Good work. I'd read something of yours several months ago and from then to now I can see improvement.

Author's Response: Thanks!

I'm glad it was an interesting start, and this is... Well I guess it does focus on werewolves... It's a collab and point of view switcher so future chapters will be different!

I never thought the formatting would be an issue... Huh... Guess I'll change that then! Thanks for telling me!

I do need to get a beta xD

Thanks and everything about Zoi will be... Explained sometime from now! For now... It's spoilers :P

Thanks! And I'm glad I've improved. :D

Mike.


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Review #2, by EverDiggory Memories and Wolves

22nd December 2011:
This was a good chapter to set up the story,but it was missing stuff...
First,I think here needs to be more internal conflict. He was taking a wolf into Hogwarts...thats a big deal.
Also,theres needs to be more details.I don't have much to say for this chapter,but I will on the next(: I can't abandon this story,cuz you've got me hooked! 7/10

Author's Response: More internal conflict, got it! xD Usually, I think I put too much... Guess sometimes I don't put enough... And DETAILS! I need to work on that...

I need to tell you though, this is a collab so the next chapter won't be by me, just out of the 3 stories on here this one was... neglected in reads and such. xD

Woo! :D Thanks.

Mike/Mihali1432. *Sorry for the long reply O.O It's longer than the review*


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