Reading Reviews for One Night
  
1 Reviews Found

Review #1, by charlottetrips One night

7th March 2012:
Interesting, I must say. Before I get into my overall feedback, there are a few points of correction I would like to point out. First is in the summary, you have a double "I" in the beginning. (I always think it's important to have a perfect summary since that is the first thing people see.) The next is with some of the names, Lucious is "Lucius" and Narcissia is "Narcissa". There were also minor spelling/grammar points throughout but I'm sure you'll catch it if you give this a good once over.

Now, I was stupidly confused at first because I thought that this story was about Regulus and Bellatrix and I was grossed out, then I reread and saw it was Rodolphus! It's interesting to think of Bellatrix and him being in love, actually just Bellatrix being in love in general. She didn't love Voldemort so much as obsess about him.

I liked the undercurrent of how Lucius and Narcissa got together because I really do believe that they were in love. That Bella and Rodolphus were just using each other struck more of a chord to me than them being in love. But it's plausible. Maybe some more on his feelings could be expounded in the beginning, some hint so that it doesn't seem so sudden in the end, you know?

The description was lovely and you had this bit flow quite nicely.

xChar

Author's Response: Oh my goodness, what an eligant review. I really appreciate the feed back!!

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