Reading Reviews for Walking in Circles
6 Reviews Found

Review #1, by tangledconstellations Walking in Circles

20th June 2015:
Heya! Reviewing for Ravenclaw, for the House Cup 2015!

This was really cool - I love the idea of this piece and I think you wrote it really well. It's the kind of piece that I imagine should have a soundtrack to it :D - and while it's pretty standalone its given me just enough to think about to get involved in the characters. I love the way the Hufflepuff team keep passing Al by, and he's still as deeply preoccupied in his thoughts. It's a really nice touch and implies the passing of time without actually explicitly saying it. I like the way he is meandering his way around the lake, too - because obviously it is symbolic, like you say in your last line. He's in a cyclic state of mind and the walking around the lake thing is very habitual. But its really cool that at the conclusion of the piece he decides he doesn't want to do that any more - and even though we don't know much about the characters other than what you've given us here you really set up his relationship with Pam really well, and I'm rooting for them at the end.

This is just really nice to read - it's ever so well balanced and I love the way the story pans out here.

:D Laura xxx

Author's Response: Thanks for coming by! I'm glad you enjoyed this. I think I wrote this story right at the beginning of the period when I was getting overly stressed about writing, trying to insert bits of symbolism or small metaphors or significant but subtle themes into everything. This story wasn't particularly subtle in its symbolism, but it's nice to hear that you think it worked. Maybe I'll go back and take a look at it at some point, and see if I could make it a little better. Thank you, and go 'claws!

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Review #2, by The Summer Snake Walking in Circles

26th May 2015:
Greetings from The Summer Snake! I have recently slithered out of hibernation and discovered this amazing place with such amazing stories, so I want to read and review as many as I can before I go back into hibernation!

This was a very interesting story! I liked your characterisation of Albus. Some bits of this made me chuckle (well I would have chuckled if I could - being a reptile and all) such as Albus thinking his thoughts could think. Poor guy, so confused.

His dynamic with Pam was also well-written. In such a short narrative, I got a pretty good idea of their relationship. The inclusion of Grace in the mix was interesting and I wonder whether things would happen between Grace/Albus.

The note this ended on was nice - Albus finally came to a decision and did what he felt was right without overthinking too much. The way he let Pam down was also gentle and straightforward which was good.

All in all, I really liked reading this! Wandering across this land of HPFF stories is surely a treat for me xD Good job!

*showers confetti and flowers* Have a nice summer!

Now I'll be off to explore more of this wonderful sun! See ya!

With love,
The Summer Snake

Author's Response: Hello! Thank you for the lovely surprise review! I'm glad you enjoyed the story. It came out of nowhere, if I remember correctly, so it's nice to hear that it worked.

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Review #3, by Miss Muggle Walking in Circles

5th March 2012:
This is really good!

I like Albus' character. His view is unique and very well done. I especially like the lines "I'm far from the only regular on the lake, but it is the only place you can find me regularly" and "But the thing is, I don't want to wander. I want to think, without worrying about where my feet are going. I need a path to follow." I think they both say a lot about Al and his walks around the lake.

I do wish there was some more background on Al and his relationships with Pam, Grace, and even Lily. Grace especially was kind of thrown in there without much information on who she is.

I love how at the end, he goes of the beaten path and stops going in circles. The repetition before led up to that perfectly.

Author's Response: Thank you for the nice review. I focused a lot on language and symbolism in this story, and I think it shows. You're not the first one to suggest more background on Albus's relationships, and though before I said I was happy with the way it is, I do see now that more information would improve the story. Perhaps when I have some free time I'll see what I can do.

Grace, I can tell you, was invented purely for the purposes of engaging Albus in conversation, demonstrating that he has many interruptions, and steering him towards his final realization that he doesn't want to "walk in circles" any longer. She's essentially a tool I used to move things along, though I'm sure she has a background of her own if I decide to go looking.

I'm glad you enjoyed it, and appreciated the repetition. Thanks for your thoughts!

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Review #4, by faerieall Walking in Circles

4th December 2011:
Aw, I actually really like your Al. Many people write their introspective male characters with a sort of... feminine? energy. But Al reminds me of boys I know and it's refreshing. He's a thinker without being lofty.

Also... am I wrong for thinking that you should write a second piece or expand it? If there was anything I could say to improve this, it would be to expand upon the relationship between Grace and Al. I felt like her presence was half explained, like there should have been something else between them.

Still, I quite liked this and the banner is absolutely stunning!


Author's Response: I'm a girl, so I don't pretend to have any insight into the male mind. :P But I did do my best to make Al a genuine thinker, not the angsty teen we read about so much, so it's nice to hear that worked.

It's true that I left a lot out here. I was focusing more on Al than his relationship as a whole, and I'm not a romance writer at all, so I'm not surprised I avoided a lot of detail on them. I'm sure I could write a whole story on them if I wanted, and could invent all sorts of details and issues and personas to go along with it. Fact is, there's always more story to tell. Sorry if you thought there should be more, but I think I'll keep away from a big romance here. Thanks for the review!

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Review #5, by forsakenphoenix Walking in Circles

8th October 2011:
So, I think your Albus is probably my most favorite characterization of him. He's very pensive but he over-thinks things and I like that contradiction. Lily's observation about how no one paces anymore except in novels because people like the imagery was very clever and Albus doing it anyway.

There are actually a lot of lines in here that I really adored. That Albus was not the only regular one at the lake but you can find him there regularly - I don't know, it just says a lot about his character. He seems reliable, you know?

I really liked the ending too. There was so much repetition throughout the story about how Albus follows this path that he's created around the lake, walking in circles, and people following in his footsteps. Then at the end, he goes off the path and tries to move forward rather than in circles. It's just really well-done.

This entire story was excellently written and your Albus is simply to die for. I loved this. :)

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you liked it, there were a few experiments in here (the regular/regularly line one of them) and I'm happy they worked out. Also good to hear that the repetition made sense, as opposed to being boring. I've tried countless Next Gen characters, have tried some multiple times, and I like this Albus too. ;) Thanks for dropping by.

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Review #6, by kalkay Walking in Circles

3rd October 2011:
This was wonderful! I loved the whole idea and premise of the story. It was excellently written!

I loved your last paragraph, simply divine. And how you presented Albus' thoughts was excellent for the story's style. A few edits I saw as I was reading through, but very minimal. I'm sure you'll get them when you have time!

Again, magnificent story! Can't wait to read more from you!

Keep writing! :)

Author's Response: Thanks for the review! This was one of those stories that I just started writing, and as it grew I realized what I wanted to happen. The first paragraph was really all I knew about Albus until I got going.

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