You have what appears to be a good plotline. But if I may say something. Keep it believable. You said that they'd been walking for about two hours (whilst on the train) and I thought right away, how long is the train. For that amount of time the train would have to be more than 4 miles long which I found hard to swallow. As I said you have a nice plot but plz be realistic in the wording. This could be the reason you have no reviews. 7/10. Report Review
Well all I can really say is that Jame's is no quitter. A nice start to your story and 9/10 and moving onto the next chapter. Report Review
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