Do you enjoy breaking all of our hearts? Report Review
I can't believe Dominique left! They were such a good couple :( I hope Ignotus can get over what he has lost and somehow miraculously see Dominique again one day. I love this story, keep the chapters coming! Report Review
Oh my goodness. THIS CHAPTER. I read it when you first posted it, and I was amazed at the emotional punch it packs! So I decided to pick this one for that review I owe you :)
First, can I just gush about Dominique for a second. I absolutely love what you're doing with her character. I love that she is equal parts sweetness and fire. I love that she's been able to find a home in 1234 when she knew that something just wasn't right about her modern-day life. And (this is going to sound weird) I really like seeing a female character who's comfortable in a traditional gender role. There's so much pressure to create Strong Women in stories, and after a while they all start looking the same. You've created a woman who is at ease in a world dominated by men. But at the same time, she's not afraid to do the right thing no matter what society might say (like grabbing a sword and fighting to save her man.) She can do it all, and I love seeing such a well-rounded portrayal of her :)
At first I thought I wouldn't like Callum. But he really grew on me over the last few chapters, and I can see how he and Dominique would have really complimented each other. He's easygoing and funny, and I was glad to see Dominique trying to make things work with him. Like her, I could definitely see the two of them being happy together. Also, I'm glad you didn't make the "rival" a bad guy in this. It makes the situation even more emotional and complex.
And then this chapter! I knew something had to happen to Callum (because of course Ignotius and Dominique have to end up together), but I can't believe you did THIS to us! What can I say, Drue? It was so touching and deeply sad. You did such a wonderful job of pulling us into this moment. When he was dying in Dominique's arms, I was spellbound.
You're doing such a wonderful job! I'm following your updates and really enjoying them. Keep up the awesome work!
--Maggie Report Review
Thanks for another fantastic chapter! Was it Veritaserum the first time? I don't remember with so many amazing chapters between them :) Keep it up! Report Review
Ooh my godness that was all so heartbreaking. Lady Brigid, Dominique seeing them together, her leaving... just wow. One of your best chapters yet in my opinion.
I really am hoping that Dom gets home, even if it's just to see her family for a short amount of time. Or Ignotus finds a way to get to her.. very Kate and Leopold haha that would be brilliant.
Thanks so much for sharing this amazing chapter! This honestly is one of my favourite stories on this site. Report Review
I'm so sorry I haven't been around reviewing these past few weeks, but life has been hectic and I've been relying on my phone to read fanfiction, which doesn't let me leave reviews. I've still been reading this though, and I had to come back for this chapter.
I've got to disagree with Dominique on this one: I don't think the Pellinors telling Tyrion about his father's death is kind, but rude. Of course, he didn't deserve to be lied to, but there's something about this that I find really unacceptable, for some weird reason.
Right, the rest of this chapter. WHY? I was so happy Ignotus had overcome (to a point) his fears, and I was hoping for a ride into the sunset ending, and now she's gone and he's sad and I'm sad and I want to know what happens next!
This story really has the power to reduce me to a pile of mush. I wonder if Ignotus'll strike another bargain with death to have Dom back? Or maybe he'll switch eras and appear in 2022 (though I have no idea how that would work)? Gah, and I can't wait to see the other Weasleys' reactions.
Fabulous chapter, as always! Report Review
Finally i'm so glad Dominique and Ignotus are together, even if the chapter ends on a worrying note, i still can't stop smiling! I love this story so much because it is completely different from any on this site, your writing is very captivating, please keep the chapters coming! :) Report Review
It was kind of unexpected to me, that he went to her rooms. Like, he's usually so focussed on staying proper and gentlemanly that it was a surprise he changed his mind.
But great chapter! Thanks for sharing! Report Review
So even though I was quite suspicious of what Dominique's future with Callum would be like, I'm really sad that he died. I definitely did not expect that! And you've also made me feel bad for not trusting him completely, since he seems like a good man.
Poor Dominique! She must be feeling so confused, and I really feel sorry for her...she's lost her family (even if it is only temporarily) she couldn't have Ignotus, and now she's lost her fiancé. She doesn't seem to have much luck in life in general.
"Love her enough for both of us"...that was so sweet and actually quite moving. It makes me wonder how much Callum actually knew about Ignotus and Dominique and the fact that Ignotus admitted he already does love her was adorable! Now he just has to admit to her that he's actually engaged (that'll be an interesting conversation!) and somehow get rid of that fiancée...
I'm intrigued to see what Dominique's reaction will be and how she will grieve, since so far she's been helping Ignotus as he mourned the loss of both his brothers. Now it will have to be the pair of them helping each other, since Ignotus has lost his best friend (another one that doesn't have much luck!) and Dominique has lost her fiancé. I'm hoping it brings them together rather than pushes them apart.
nott theodore :) Report Review
Love her for both of us.. Quick, better break off Ignotus' engagement! (I wish)
I find it interesting that Iggy still hasn't told Dom that he's promised to someone else. That's going to cause a bit of a disagreement, methinks.
How awful that Callum died. You wrote that really well, though. Poor Dom, she's going to be so confused now. Report Review
love it again! such an amazing story! Report Review
Well, I'm not really sure what I expected from this chapter, but (in the best possible way) I don't think this was it!
I really enjoyed the opening and the chance to see what is happening in 2022 and the attitudes of her family to their loss. It's clear that Dominique is being missed a lot more than she expected at home, especially by Victoire. I thought you wrote her grief and sense of loss very well.
The contrast between 2022 and 1234 was really interesting; it was as if we saw a reversal of roles between Victoire, who was planning her wedding and has now postponed it, and Dominique, who was quiet and has now begun planning her own wedding. I liked seeing the friendship between Dominique and Jocosa as well as the interaction with Ignotus, and Dominique's recognition that men don't like shopping, whatever time they're in, was really amusing.
I think the part that I really didn't expect was the ambush. Even though I'm undecided about Callum, I was really worried when I heard that he'd been wounded. Seeing Dominique go into action to save him highlights how much she cares for him, but it was also lovely to see her in her element, showing off the skills that her auror training rewarded her with. It's quite nice to see her acting how she would in her own time, and I think Ignotus, Callum and Edmund will all be shocked when they witness what she can do.
That cliffhanger! That's mean! I really want to know what happens and I hope that she's alright, as well as the others! I hope you update soon!
Also, I was wondering if you know how long this story will be yet?
nott theodore :) Report Review
So many amazing updates lately!
It was really good to hear from Dominique's family, I was wondering if anyone from her time would come back into the story. She's clearly more missed than she anticipated.
The ambush was unexpected, in a good way. I kind of hope Dom uses advanced magic to save everyone/Callum, to let them know she's not one of them and that women aren't helpless.
Oh and excuse me, Callum?! Engaged?! Didnt leave a review last chapter about it, so here you go! Their engagement was a brilliant twist, but I don't know if I'm happy about it. She's meant to be with Ignotus! If Dom isn't worried about being married, she clearly isn't planning on going back to her time any time soon..
So wow, great updates. Thanks so much! Can't wait to read more. Do you have many more chapters planned?Author's Response: Thank you SO MUCH for the review!! I'm glad you found it as a nice twist! I was hoping it would be taken that way. There had been a LOT of romance so we needed some action! :)
And I know how you feel! About Dominique and Ignotus. So trust me. :) The story is a huge Dominique/Ignotus ship. Patience. All good things in time. ;)
As for the chapters planned out, I do actually have QUITE A BIT planned out! I think, with the way this story's headed, I think I'm looking at roughly 40 chapters. :O I still surprise myself with that number. :D
Thanks for the review! Hope to see you back for the next chapter! Report Review
I love this story so much!!! I want to know what's happening back in the future though! Are they still looking for Dom? She's been gone for a long time. Will Harry get his cloak back somehow? Because right now there are two in the past ahHh!! I can't wait to see how this story plays out!! Report Review
amazing! please update soon! i am addicted! Report Review
holy crap, so I just read all of this in one sitting, and it's like 2:00 in the morning so this might be a bit incoherent, but wow I really love this story, like it's so freaking good and interesting and original and I don't really know what else to say, I'm really fascinated by you characterization and the way that you've managed to bring all of the characters from the tale of the three brothers to life and make them seem human and holy poo do I love Dominique and Ignotus together, but surprisingly I don't hate her and Callum together. I really really like how well you've managed to portray wizarding life in the 1200's although I am definitely interested in knowing more about what's going on in dom's family in the 2000's. I'm also really fascinated with your portrayal of death, and even though I know that Ignotus is supposed to live a long life and then finally go to face death when he is old and ready for it I can't help but feel a little bit afraid for him.
I apologize if this has been a bit of a confusing rant, but I felt like you deserved a review :)
this story is truly phenomenal and I really can't wait to read more, keep up the excellent work
10/10Author's Response: Oh my goodness thank you!! I can't tell you how pleased I am to hear you say all of this! It had been awhile since I had gotten a lot of feedback on the majority of the story, so really! Thank you so much!!
I am SO glad to hear that you enjoyed it enough to read it all in one sitting! :D Seriously! YAY! I'm so glad.
Thank you SO SO SO much for your awesome review. You really made my day.
I really hope to see you back for the future chapters, and I hope I can continue to please. Thanks so much for your input!
Chapter 16 should be up by the end of the week! :) Some of that 2022 stuff will be in there also. ;)
Again, THANK YOU! :D Report Review
Thank you for the quick update, it made me really happy!
I don't want this to happen! Dominique should be marrying Ignotus and not Callum! It's all going wrong!
Even though I don't want Dominique to marry Callum, I really enjoyed this chapter. The way you write is so compelling, and I think your characters are absolutely brilliant. Somehow you manage to keep the speech consistent with the time, and the settings are quite simple but very effective. It's such a pleasure reading this story!
The beginning of this chapter was so sad, because I really want Dom and Ignotus (Dignotus? Ignomique?) to be together because they obviously love each other, and Ignotus was really hurt that she would agree to marry someone else, but at the same time wanting her to be happy. Now they're both engaged to someone else and it's going to make everything more difficult. Ignotus should have told Dominique about Brigid before she was driven to making this sort of decision, because then at least she would know the reasons behind his actions. I hope he tells her soon, because she actually deserves to know.
As far as Callum is concerned, I don't entirely trust him. I know that at the time people got engaged and married when they hardly knew each other, but I don't think Dominique knows Callum well enough to truly make a decision about whether she can be happy as his wife. Although he seems a reformed character, enchanted as he is at the moment with Dominique, I'm not entirely sure that it will last. At the same time, he is a good match for Dominique because he doesn't follow all the conventions of the time, and is much more like the sort of person she would encounter in 2022. But if the spell breaks, he could easily return to his former character and then Dominique would be doubly unhappy. Maybe I'm just reading far too much into this though, because I really want Dominique to be with Ignotus and don't trust Callum because of it! (I've decided I like Ignomique better than Dignotus as a couple name now).
As usual, I really loved this chapter and since you mentioned that there would be a scene from 2022 in the next chapter, I'm intrigued to see what will happen there. I think I'd like to see some more of Ignotus' mother soon so that we can see what she thinks of Dominique and Callum, and to see how soon Ignotus is meant to be married.
I'll look forward to the next chapter and I hope you update soon again!
nott theodore :) Report Review
...why have some words been replaced with tinky winky or garden shed etc? Report Review
I really enjoyed this chapter, but it was a bit of a love-hate enjoyment! I love Dom and Ignotus together and it was great to see more of them in this chapter, because I've been missing it in recent chapters. There was so much of them together here that it more than made up for it!
There was so much emotion in this chapter and I loved the way you wrote the passion between Dominique and Ignotus. I'm glad that Dominique finally admitted how she felt about Ignotus, although I kind of wish the 'problems' of Brigid and Callum would just disappear! I think that Ignotus is going to have to explain to Dominique about Brigid soon, because I really don't want her to marry Callum in response!
However I do think that you wrote the part about what Dominique's prospects are really well. The realisation that she doesn't have anything to help her in the future if she remains in 1234. It really highlighted how much her life has changed with the time travel - all of the considerations for marriage in Ignotus' time would not have mattered before for Dominique, but now her life is controlled by them, which makes me feel really sorry for her.
I would like to know a bit more about what Dominique's family are experiencing with her missing and whether they have worked out what has happened to her yet. I find it interesting that Dominique has started collecting the ingredients to make the potions that sent her back to 1234, and I wonder whether she will actually make the potion at all when it comes down to it - and if the effects will be the same. I'm kind of hoping that, from the title, Ignotus and Dom can be together in the end!
Anyway, great chapter and I'm really looking forward to the next update!
nott theodore :)Author's Response: WOW! Thank you so much for this incredibly helpful review! I can't tell you how much this means to me.
Ah and it was so lengthy and full of great and helpful comments!! Thank you so much.
And hopefully I can ease that want of yours to get back to 2022! ;) I'm planning some 2022 scenes in chapter 16! :)
And thanks for everything you mentioned! I know people don't want her to marry Callum. I'm always 100% rootin' for her and Ignotus, so you'll just have to see! Thanks for having the patience to bear with me through all of this though to have faith that she and Ignotus will pull through! That's the sign of a true, faithful reader and reviewer to me! :D
Again, thank you SO MUCH! Your reviews are incredible!! Thanks and hope to see you back soon! :) Report Review
I realised when this story was updated with chapter fourteen that I hadn't left you a review on this chapter, and I really wanted to so I'm doing it now!
I have to say that I think you've developed Callum's character really well and his growing role in this story is interesting - and going to complicate life a bit more for Dominique and Ignotus, I think! If it wasn't for Ignotus, I would say that Dominique and Callum were a good match. I thought you wrote the scene when Callum asks for Ignotus' permission very well, and it's nice to see that Jocosa and Dominique are friends. Dominique's personality, and the time she came from, are obviously appealing to a lot of people and mean that they can act differently around her. Anyway, a great chapter!
nott theodore :)Author's Response: Ack! Thank you so much!! I always look forward to your reviews. They are so helpful and really mean a lot to me.
Thanks for the input you provided! I'm glad to see that you agree with most things I'm doing and the characterizations and such! It really does make me so happy and it eases my paranoia quite a bit.
Thanks again! So much! I hope to see you back for the next chapter. Your reviews really do always make my day! Report Review
Reading this pains me! great, great chapter!Author's Response: Thank you! I'm sorry that it pains you! Just bear with me. :)
Thanks for the review! I hope to hear from you again soon! Report Review
Oh Ignotus and Dominique are so good together!! He can't marry Brigid! I love this story and cannot wait for the nest chapter, you've written this really well :)Author's Response: I know. I just want them to be together already. I love them. Love them, love them, love them!!
Thanks so much for the review, Fiona! I hope to see you back for the next chapter! It's almost finished, so hopefully it will be up mid-next week! Report Review
Thanks so much for updating. This chapter is fantastic, as usual.
I love how you've developed and introduced Callum into the story. I like him as a person and I like him for Dom, if it weren't for the existence of Ignotus! I'm so nervous to see what happens when Dom finds out about his proposal. Is the housekeeper truly ignorant of Dom and Ignotus' relationship?
I'd really love to hear more about Dom's family back at home. Where do they think she's gone? How are they going to find her?
And what about Lady Brigid? I hope she comes back into it. I wonder what Ignotus will tell Dom about her.. so really, in a way they're both guilty of encouraging other suitors. They need to talk!
Haha okay thanks for reading my essay. Thanks for updating!! :)Author's Response: Ack! I know! I understand how you feel, and hopefully I can give you answers soon! I have the entire next chapter all written out, and hopefully that one will provide some answers for you!
As always, thanks for being such a faithful reviewer. It really means a lot to me! Thanks, and hope to see you back with chapter 14! :) Report Review
Hello! So sorry for my late review, but I'm finally here with your request. I've heard a lot of good things about your stories, and I'm excited to begin!
First paragraph in and I'm already hooked. It's so unique; we rarely read about this period in history on HPFF unless it's a founders story. (I have no idea when Hogwarts was actually founded... but I'm guessing somewhere along here.) Your language really suits the time period! One thing I've noticed is that your sentences could be shortened. I'm guilty of run-on sentences too, but it's much easier for the reader to understand if the sentences are shorter!
Another thing I'm noticing is that they sigh a lot xD It's very easy to write, as it conveys a certain kind of emotion so simply. But imagine if you were actually listening to somebody who sighed three or four times in as many minutes. It'd sound a bit stange, yeah?
You've really developed your characters quite well! From what I can recall, we know very little about the three brothers other than what was written in the fairy-tale, but you've already given us so much information about their history and the way they treat one another within the first few paragraphs. Nicely done!
A lot of what I'm noticing is some shortening that could be done. Shorter sentences have more impact, in my opinion ;3 For example, when dialogue is clearly being said by a specific person you could leave it with just the dialogue. "We survived, did we not?" was clearly said by Cadmus, and the punchiness of not including a "convinced Cadmus" adds humor to his line, and the light-hearted scene in general. Or "Well done, Cadmus," is clearly a compliment--you could just move that line up into the previous paragraph and we'd know who's talking. Another example is "Cadmus set off in the lead, and the three brothers galloped forward. Their horses picked up speed," which is a bit redundant. If the horses are already galloping forward, then we can assume they've picked up speed :3
Just some places like that around the chapter that could use some tidying up. You're a really good story-teller! It's just important that the first chapter can get "to the point" enough to draw a reader in, without skimping on the detail. I think by trimming the excess phrases, you could totally achieve this!
I like how Victoire seems to have gotten her mother's personality, while Dominique seems more like her father. The transition between scenes was also nice. It went from a very somber, kind of suspenseful moment with Death to the trifles of wedding napkins.
Gah! I love reading about older-Harry, and I think you've got him spot on. Going from loving uncle to serious boss in a matter of nanoseconds is perfect. I also really liked that Dominique is an outsider to her cousins. (Another good spot to do some weeding is in that paragraph; where you say "her cousins" quite a bit when "them/they" would suffice.) Usually we read about the Potter-Weasley clan as this big, hyperactive group of troublemakers. I like this take, it's quite refreshing. I feel like she and Harry could relate and maybe have a special bond, both feeling estranged from their families--whether Lily/James or the Dursleys--in different ways.
I think her personality also lends itself well to the idea of invisibility. She's often viewed just as that to her cousins, and even to Victoire, it seems. You've set up some really nice parallels between she and Ignotus. I'm a sucker for crack-ships anyway, but this is nicely done!
Gah! She already ruined the cloak! Oh no. I like this twist. It makes us ask questions and want to know what could happen to her.
My only serious critiques have been mentioned. I think if you found a beta-reader who's good at shortening sentences, it would really help you out! We just need to be able to see the "meat" of the story, if you know what I mean.
All in all, brilliant start! Feel free to re-request in the future.Author's Response: Oh my goodness!! Wow, thank you so much for you incredible review!!
I can't tell you how thrilled I was to see this with all of your input. It really was so beneficial to me. You gave me a lot of input that I hadn't heard before, so I really appreciate it. As for the lengthy sentences, I'll to work on that. :)
Really thank you SO much for your input and I'm glad you seemed to have enjoyed the story a fair amount.
Again, thanks so much! I'll be taking all your words to heart and hopefully I can come request another review from you sometime soon! Report Review
I want you to know I'm still reading and loving every chapter, but that I just can't come up with coherent reviews these days.
So. I'm happy Dom considers Jocosa as a friend, I'm angry Ignotus is bottling everything up, I'm furious at Callum for making things more complicated, I hope Ignotus does something about Brigid, I hope Dom makes the first stpe in Ignotus' direction again. That more or less sums it up.
Great chapter again! :)
One tiny little thing is that I think that Callum would say 'Certainly' instead of 'Sure', but maybe that's just me...Author's Response: Of course! I understand that about coming up with reviews. I find that I don't leave reviews like I used to, despite how much I wish I did.
It means the world to me, though, that you still find the time to read and leave what you can of a review. It really does mean a lot to me.
And thanks for pointing those things out! I'll be sure to pay attention to that.
As always, thanks for the awesome review and thanks for being such a faithful supporter! :) Hope to see you back in chapter 13! Report Review
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