Reading Reviews for Someone New
  
9 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Erised Someone New

18th July 2012:
Ooh, second person! So interesting. I'm not gonna lie, I had to re-read the first bit to make sure I knew who was speaking, but I always do with yours :P anyway, I think you've actually written something that has a really valid point - in the books we see how Harry experiences Sirius' death, but not Remus who was one of his closest friends. I think you managed to portray his feelings and emotions excellently, and it really came across that a part of him had died along with Sirius, assuming that's what you were intending.

The second part was possibly even more confusing but I finally understood it. I always feel so stupid when I read your things! :P anyway, the relationship between Tonks and Remus is just heartbreaking, and I just really wanted to reach out to them both and give them a big hug, haha. The way you showed Remus' past and future in Tonks was really cleverly done, amazing job there.

Loved it as usual! :)

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Review #2, by luna_lovely Someone New

2nd June 2012:
i love this! thank you for writing a story that though sad, makes me happy at least until i think about the battle of hogwarts. remus was happy.

Author's Response: Thank you so much for such a lovely review. I'm glad you liked it!

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Review #3, by SilentConfession Someone New

30th April 2012:
I'm not sure where to start! This is absolutely lovely, i think i've fallen in love with your writing so if I squee like a fangirl, please forgive, but I'm absolutely in love with this one-shot.

this has always been one of the moments i've always wondered about, the moment when Remus realizes he's all alone. Gah! There are just so many emotions that i'm feeling right now and i don't know exactly how to say it. But i loved how you explored how he just sat and waited for Sirius to come back and i couldn't help but just remember how he had been the one to grab Harry and tell him that he was gone in the book and yet he was just waiting for Sirius to saunter back in too. *sobs*

Also, i've never liked second person that much. It's always annoyed me because it's like "IT"S NOT ME STOP REFERRING TO ME FOOL AUTHOR" ;D but i actually didn't notice the 'you' till half way through and even then i never felt annoyed because it somehow just fit with this story of it coming from Remus. You pulled it off wonderfully and made the sadness and angst of Remus seem so much stronger through that.

Speaking of Remus, his emotions are so spot on and his characterization is perfect. Honestly, this explains to me his flight in the seventh book to me as well. If only a little, like he wanted to try and protect Harry, the only link he had left from those twenty years of loss. That was all that was left and he can't let those memories fall into obscurity. I also think you've really nailed how Remus was always a little needy and selfish. He wasn't thinking of anything but everything he didn't have anymore. No one else really mattered or what his actions would mean later on.

I think one of my favourite lines here was Your father, James, Lily, Peter, Sirius, your mother, and Sirius again: empty eyes, empty faces, souls without bodies, Peter a body without a soul. I've always just felt so sad how that group was slowly torn apart by the war and you wording of this just brought that to the forefront of my mind and really highlighted the loss Remus must have been feeling.

This is truly very very lovely and I love your writing style and how easily to flows together and i LOVE the angst. You write it so stellar and there's just so much insight into this one piece of work here, i cannot believe you've never written Remus before because it seems like just understand the core of his person here. Honestly, excellent job!

Author's Response: Eep, eep, eep, eep, EEP. I am so, so sorry that this has taken so long for me to reply to. I'm usually very good, honestly, but exam season has really taken it out of me. I'm doubly sorry because I've not yet had chance to read and review your story but I intend on doing so very, very soon (my exams finish tomorrow, then I'm going home for a few days so the weekend is probably most likely). Thank you for being so patient with me.

Remus holding Harry back was a moment in the book, and oddly mainly the film, that really stood out to me because it struck me when I saw it visualised on screen just how much he must have been hurting too. I would presume only the Unspeakables and perhaps Dumbledore would really understand how the veil works so I liked the idea of Remus sitting and hoping and coming slowly to terms with the fact that Sirius can't come back.

SECOND PERSON IS DEATH. Usually. It has its moments. I detest reading it, personally, but when there are a lot of same-gender pronouns to deal with, it often works best for me. I hate first person too :P

Thank you so much. I don't often give much thought to characterisation until afterwards because they tend to just come alive at my fingertips but I start fretting as soon as I've posted. Remus especially because he's so loved by so many.

Exactly but I kind of wanted to show that selfishness in this sense is sometimes justified. I don't know many people who wouldn't act like Remus does in some of these circumstances (I know people who would run away from an unwanted pregnancy etc.). I think you'd have to be pretty perfect as a person not to have your moments of selfishness and need, all the more so if you're a werewolf/outcast from society.

That line means a lot to me. It was the point when I wrote this when I realised exactly how much he'd lost, possibly more than Harry because he knew and loved all of those individuals for so long and they accepted him for who he was, in spite of his condition. I really wanted to make people aware of that.

Thank you so much for such a stunning review. I promise I will get to you as soon as exams are done and I've had a bit of a breather. I can't wait to read your story!

xx


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Review #4, by justonemorefic Someone New

30th April 2012:
Oh oh oh the pacing and mood of the beginning it's like, it's like being sucked into a vacuum of stars (a bit influenced by the banner there too), too fast but so vivid. One soul after another like constellations. Itís only a veil, for goodnessí sake, a curtain canít kill somebody. I really love that line, it's so sardonic.

And this: you take your wand from your robes, wondering if it is possible to splinch memories as you Disapparate. can I marry that? Ahh, he's so alone there ;A;

I never really thought about the scene where Tonks finds out, I realized! I love how you used elements of Sirius alongside her, wraps it all together. she is twenty-three with bubble-gum hair and Siriusí eyes and a smile that is nobodyís but hers. And she really is that -- I can see her almost like a soft glow in the grey. Heart achingg D:

♥ miss youuu

Author's Response: GINA GINA GINA GINA GINA.
EXAMS FINISH TOMORROW AND I WILL BE BACK. ISH. UNTIL SEPTEMBER. WOO.

I don't remember the beginning of this but THANK YOU. The curtain line sticks out like a sore thumb but I liked it too much to scrap it for the sake of pretty words :D

Marry away. I still don't quite like the phrasing of that sentence :P

I wanted a moment that gave her hope of a relationship more than one in which she finds out about Sirius dying but they were both quite interesting in my head.

Miss you tooo. Thank you oodles for this and I promise I'll catch up with your stuff this summer. LIFE ALWAYS GETS IN THE WAY.


xx


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Review #5, by forsakenphoenix Someone New

8th October 2011:
After your lovely reviews, I came to your author's page and after a quick glance, I saw this little gem just waiting to be read. I put it on a list to remind me to read it and a couple of weeks later, here I am.

The summary is what drew me to this piece to begin with, and then I saw Remus listed as a character and I knew that I had to read this. Remus and Sirius are my two favorite characters and I will devour anything written about them, especially if it's as good as this.

When I read something like this, it's hard for me to figure out what it is about my writing that draws you in because holy hell, woman, you can write. I actually hate second person but I didn't even realize I was reading a second person narrative until I was half-way through and by then, I didn't care.

There's something beautiful about the subtlety of the words you choose in that they certainly pack a punch where they're meant to. This story made my heart ache but it wasn't an outright, devastating angst.

Remus's reflections on Sirius - how he came back once before and so Remus was just waiting for him to come back. In the end, it was just a dumb piece of cloth that stole him from them. Then all the people who had left him and gah, poor Remus is always the last one standing. I just have so much sympathy for him as a character and you've done such a fantastic job delving into the grief that I think would cripple a normal person. Remus, he still remains strong though, and I just...my poor heart breaks, especially when he went to tell Tonks the news and he tried so hard to be brave and serious but the entire time he was crying. HE WAS CRYING. And then Tonks wiped his tears away and they kissed and...there is still hope! There is always hope.

I think this was my favorite line: "...wondering if it is possible to splinch memories as you Disapparate." It's just those small things I mentioned before that really make you feel. Splinching is painful but I can only imagine the memories that assault him, like this line because it's perfect and sums up the Marauders so well: "He is all that remains of twenty years past, of empty grounds and roaring howls and the nameless, endless love that you called friendship." Loved it, so much. Oh, and another small detail but when Remus has her arms around Harry, you say his arms are around Harry's broadening chest, and it's such an insignificant detail but it reminds us that Harry is still a boy who has many years to grow and he's already lost his whole family too.

The only thing I noticed was this sentence: "your keep your lips painfully drawn in a severe line." First your = you.

But I absolutely adored this story. You tell a lot in so few words and it's just perfect. Loved it. :)

Author's Response: Oh my gosh, I'm almost six months late with this. I am so, so sorry. I've had no time at all to sit down and give the longer unanswered reviews the time they deserve for a reply and this, especially, needs a huge amount of time dedicated to it.

It's funny - I used to read a lot of Remus and Sirius when I first started reading fanfiction but they've fallen to the wayside a bit in recent years. I suppose it's quite hard to find a well-written Marauders-centric story without OCs!

Thank you so, so much. I can't even comprehend what you've said because that's such an enormous compliment from somebody like you. I also hate second person but I really struggle with first and third was getting too confusing with all the 'he's' involved. I had no choice but the fact that you didn't notice must mean I didn't do it too badly!

I did want a subtlety to this. I wanted it to reflect who I think Remus is, someone very reserved and gentle and breaking inside. I didn't want it to smash anyone's heart to bits but maybe make them ache a little.

You know, I can't remember writing this at all and I've just had to reread it myself to see what I intended by all of this. Isn't that awful?

Anyway, I do know that I wanted some real, deep hope rooted in Remus that this unknown thing, the veil, might be something else and that he might come back. I wanted to get across this sense of loneliness and having nobody left and realising that slowly, which is why I brought Peter in to the equation.

Hope. I love hope. It's one of my favourite words ♥

I worked so hard on that line! I still can't stand it. I love the concept but trying to fit it into the second person was nigh-on impossible. I'm so glad that you pulled it out!

Not insignificant, not at all. I think it's so important to remember that he's just a kid and he's got so much to cope with. I think that gets forgotten sometimes.

Oopsie! I think I changed it but I will double check now. Thanks for pointing it out.

I can't even...yeah, I'm still kind of speechless by this review. I can't remember the last one that made me react like this did.

Thank you so, so much for taking the time to read this and then leave such a wonderful review. I appreciate it so much


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Review #6, by adluvshp Someone New

12th September 2011:
Hey there!

This is AditiDraco95 =)

Wow, you did an amazing job with this piece!

Firstly, let me say, I do not generally read Second Persons because they confuse me, But you pulled it off so well - there was no confusion at all! You did write this really well. The emotions and feelings came off greatly as well. I could feel Remus' pain and I must say it was portrayed really well. The Angst was quite prominent and I liked that. I was really hooked while reading. You wove your story around the scenario I gave you quite well - there were so many plots running through my mind for the situation but I definitely didn't think of this - good job!!
All in all, the emotion, the characterization, the plot and the narrative was really very good.

A well deserved 10/10 for the story!

Cheers!
AD

P.S. Thank you for entering my challenge :)

Author's Response: Hi!

I don't read or write second person, really. I hate it passionately but when I started with 'he is dead', I thought it would be too confusing to refer to Sirius AND Remus as he, hence the choice of narrative. I'm so glad it worked!

I had a few ideas too but then I thought of this moment. It's one that breaks my heart in the film because I never think about Harry trying to get to Sirius, but Remus holding onto the only thing he now has left and doing so to stop himself from diving after him. That's really what inspired this.

Thank you so much! I'm glad you liked it and it's no problem - I really enoyed writing this.


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Review #7, by SnitchSnatcher Someone New

12th September 2011:
Rachel, Rachel, Rachel. ♥

How do you write like this? How do you make me feel so many emotions is such a small amount of words? I've always felt so horrible for Remus, being the last Marauder alive (we'll ignore the fact that Peter was alive, too). He must've been so lost without his friends, especially after just getting Sirius back, and you conveyed that perfectly. Perhaps beyond perfectly, but I don't know the word for that so we'll just stick to what I said.

I've always loved your angst, but I think this one takes the cake. It's just so brilliantly written, from the structure of the sentences to the description and the emotion to the unbelievably easy flow to it. As easy as it was to read, it was hard to process if only because it meant that some very ugly crying happened about halfway through the piece. I don't know if that makes sense - most likely, it doesn't, but what I'm basically trying to say is that you managed to make me feel all of the things and then sucked it all away. When I finished this, I felt so emotionally drained despite the fact that it's a one-shot.

A beautiful one-shot, mind, that pacts an incredible punch. I've always thought that you were one of the best (if not the best) writer on TGS - perhaps even on HPFF. You've just got such a wonderful gift of crafting magnificent and touching pieces. It's amazing.

Great - no, fantastic job, Rachel. I love it! ♥

Author's Response: Mollyyy ♥

Peter doesn't count. I know that could cause a hundred more forum posts about how Peter was a Marauder blah blah blah but post-1981, he definitely doesn't count. I think the most important bit was how he got Sirius back and then he was so horribly snatched away and I think in a way, I wanted to compare him to Harry and how similar the two of them actually are, or are in my mind. Remus always struck me as so melancholy and serious in canon and I wanted to pull some of that into this one-shot.

The one-shots I write without much thought are always the best, and aside from a little niggle with the ending and a problem at the start when I realised my brother's got my copy of OotP so I couldn't directly refer to Remus holding Harry back, it just happened. It was one of those I couldn't quite bring myself to read back, too, which I always take as something of a good sign in terms of a story's reception!

Emotionally draining is always a fantastic response to get. I know people find it awkward when reviewers say that but I think it's so important to get a response that really strikes home with the reader so THANK YOU ^_^

Ahahahaha, I'm definitely not ANY of them, lovely, but thank you. That's a massive compliment.

Thank you so much, Molly. I'm so happy you liked it!


xx


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Review #8, by Violet Gryfindor Someone New

12th September 2011:
I'm so glad that I caught this on the recently added list - seeing your name on it made me click right away, and I had to actually go back to see what it would be about, but Remus/Tonks + angst +you as author was a very healthy equation. ;)

You write Remus very well - I never would have guessed that this was your first time because you captured his personality and sadness as well as the depth of the connection he had with Sirius. You even include his bits of selfishness throughout in the way that he primarily thinks about his feelings and what he has lost - even with Tonks, he's thinking about what he needs, and that reminds me a lot of Remus in DH. You capture many aspects of his character in this one-shot, and that's wonderful to see.

Your sentences are so lovely in this story. They have that kind of flow to them that moves the narrative along gracefully and yet at the same time intensifying the angst. There's so much emotion here, as represented by all of those "ands" - Remus's thoughts and feelings are overwhelming him so that, at times, he loses track of what's going on around him while, near the end, he focuses everything on Tonks. All of this emotion lets down his guard when he's with her because she's the only one who can understand what he's lost with Sirius.

I would love for this to be canon. It feels like it's straight out of the books, even with the second-person narration (but it draws one closer to Remus and, as an added bonus, prevents pronoun confusion with Sirius :P). This is the best way that I've seen someone bring Remus and Tonks together - it's beautiful and natural. The angst fades away when they're together, and it gives Remus a happy ending, if only for a short time.

This is another fantastic story of yours. Beautifully written, spot on characterizations, and dripping with wonderful angst. Your stories are always a wonderful treat and this is no exception. ^_^

Author's Response: I never know how to reply to your reviews, Susan. If I'd been actually talking to Marina rather than typing to her, I might have deafened her after I saw this.

I always find it quite strange when people mention my characterisation because it's not something I ever think about before writing. It always sort of happens and sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Remus is someone I've never had much of an interest in writing before, even though I like him as a character and him and Tonks as a couple. When I started this, it really struck me that he's lost so many people and to lose one of his best friends twice must have been absolutely heartbreaking for him.

There's certainly a selfishness to him that I wanted to bring across with Tonks because if I wanted this one-shot to slip neatly into canon, I'd have to find a way to show that he's not about to drag her off and elope :P I wanted him to need someone but not think about how that would affect that other person.

Oh the 'ands'. It's a bit of a habit of mine, actually. That and 3 sentences on the bounce that start with 'perhaps...or perhaps...or perhaps' (occasionally 'maybe' does the trick too!) I'm glad it works, at least, because I am trying to tone them down.

I never imagined Remus to be someone who loses control in front of other people and that's what I wanted Tonks to be: this someone that he's never really appreciated before now but that he feels comfortable with in a way he's not felt for what I'd imagine to be a long while. She understands and she can see what it's doing to him and that was really important to me in this.

The pronoun confusion was actually the reason I did it :P I don't like second person - people pull it off wonderfully all the time but I don't like it - but the 'he's' would have been way too confusing for everyone and there was no way I was writing this in first person.

Exactly, though Remus will of course bring that angst back when he comes to accept Sirius has gone and 'realises' what he's done and who he is and why they can't be together, as we saw in canon. I sort of wanted to show the potential that these two had and why they fit because I do love them together.

Thank you so much, Susan! I'm still struggling to wrap my head around this. It's probably not a very intelligible response but I hope it'll do!


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Review #9, by marinahill Someone New

12th September 2011:
YOU AND YOUR ANGST ♥

Actually, you and your one-shots, too, because you write both so well so consistently.

Your words are enviable. I don't know how you pick them so flawlessly every time, but you make me feel all kinds of angst myself in the way that only you do. THIS WAS SO DAMN SAD. I felt everything right there -jabs self in heart-. You wrote Remus as Remus should be, I was pretty impressed eww there's one of those giant wasps battering my window. I mean, I was impressed with how canon you wrote him. I know you probably have avoided him before now because I think everyone has their own idea of Remus in their head, but you captured him right there.

I didn't even notice this was second person pov until now. It usually jars from the first word but I didn't even notice it! It was just so... delicate. And pretty :)

SAD. PERFECT. BEAUTIFUL.



Author's Response: YOU AND YOUR REVIEWS ♥

Oh come on, you can talk. Your vocab is far superior to mine. I just use repetition to hide the fact I've forgotten how to speak English :P

EW WASP. You do make me laugh, lovely.

I've never really avoided him, actually. It's more that I've never had anything interesting to write about him, nor given him a great deal of thought outside canon (as with most characters we know a lot about).

SO ARE YOU. ESPECIALLY THE SAD PART ;)


xx


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