Reading Reviews for Lost in the Darkness
  
10 Reviews Found

Review #1, by adluvshp Lost in the Darkness

14th March 2014:
Blackout Battle 6/20

Oh dear, this was so painful and sad and beautiful and tragic. I am really reading a lot of tearjerkers today, and this was another that simply didn't disappoint.

I think you captured the loss of losing a twin very nicely here. The way Lorcan went through and dealt with his grief was beautifully and realistically portrayed. My heart went out to him.

The flashback snippets were also an interesting way to give us some background and make us connect with the characters. I loved reading them and the way they were woven into the narrative was very effective.

I also really liked the ending. It finished at a kinda hopeful note, somewhat bittersweet, and that seemed fitting. The descriptions throughout were also nicely done. The story definitely deserved to win the challenge, so congratulations for that.

10/10
--AD
(AditiDraco95)

Author's Response: Hi! Thank you so much! I had a lot of fun writing this-maybe fun isn't quite the right word to use with this particular story though...I hate writing completely depressing stories, so I added a bit of light in there as well. I'm glad you liked it-thanks for the review!
~Sara


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Review #2, by Maelody Lost in the Darkness

7th March 2014:
Awww! What were those two kids doing there in the first place! I'm sure mama Luna would have boxed his ears off if it weren't for the fact she lost a son in all of that! :(

How terribly sad to lose a twin, and one that is not based around Fred and George is a refresher since I've been reading those like crazy lately ;).

I think the only thing I would fix about this is that in the beginning it says they weren't extremely close as brothers. I don't feel, in your writing alone, that is true. Maybe he just didn't realize it at the time? :)

I think you did a wonderful job with the genre you were given! It was scary, the thought of them being in that shop by themselves, and for whatever reason. And the way he died was just so sad and awful. :( Though it was great Lorcan had Lily by his side, and he was able to see that and accept her help, and the best of his times anyway.

Good luck with your challenge! :)

~Mae

Author's Response: Hi! Thanks for reviewing :) I'm pretty sure they were on a mission for a friend, or trying to find proof of something- it's been a while since I wrote this, I forget what I was thinking at first!

I don't think Lorcan realized it at first- the two were rather different, but they were still twins. It's one of those "You don't know what you have until it's gone" type of things. I'm glad you liked it! Thanks for reading and reviewing!

~Sara


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Review #3, by NinthHorcrux Lost in the Darkness

19th January 2014:
Wow. This is so sad but amazing and brilliantly written. Lorcan's stages of grief are all different and give the reader more and more depth into what he's feeling and his depression. Even though we have hardly any background about the twin's relationship before Lysander's death, I still felt for him nonetheless. The flashbacks also added depth and moved the story along very nicely.

I liked how at the end, it was still sad but happy. Bittersweet. Lorcan finding joy finally, in Lily, and Lily, staying by his side through all of this, very sweet. But it's still a sad story because his twin is dead, nothing will change that.

Great job! I couldn't stop reading this, hoping Lorcan would pull through and heal from Lysander's death. This is an amazing story. Good work. :)

Author's Response: Aww, thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it :)

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Review #4, by Super Secret Santa! Lost in the Darkness

30th December 2011:
Hello and Happy holiday!

That was a beautiful yet very depressing piece. I could really feel Lorcan's distress and it tore me apart. You did a wonderful job giving life to those emotions, they passed easily to the reader and that is a good thing.

If I had to give you one critic, and that is quite hard to find because it's so great as it is, it would be to add more descriptions, give more of a tangible feel to the scenes. For example, give us an idea of the colors he notices around him, may it be the robes or the walls; the things that catch his smell...

Overall though, it was a really tragic and beautiful story, I loved it! Great work!

Author's Response: Thank you Santa :) Yeah, I've been meaning to edit this...Anyway. Yeah. Thanks for the review!

~Sara


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Review #5, by SilentConfession Lost in the Darkness

6th November 2011:
I don't know why this isn't signing me on ^^^ so maddening!

Anyway! I'm here for our swap! This was so tragic and i could really feel Lorcan's emotions throughout the whole thing. I think you did a fabulous job in connecting how he might be feeling at this point. I also loved how Lily corrected herself when she asked him how he was... it's true... it's such a ridiculous question to ask people when they've lost someone.

The only thing i would have liked to see is a little more description or something in each secion. Sometimes i felt like there just wasn't enough to really sink my teeth into. But overall i think you did a great job with dealing with this subject!

I also liked how you wrote their relationship and how it was so simple yet incredibly deep. It was nice to see how she was always there, never failing in her support. Really beautiful work here.

Author's Response: Hello there :)

Thak you! It was a bit difficult to wrote those scenes and such, since I haven't ever lost anyone extremely close to me, so I'm glad you think I did well.

Description. Yes, I've been told I need to work on that :/. I have problems with that.

Well, thanks for the review :)

~Sara


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Review #6, by Levana Lost in the Darkness

16th October 2011:
Wow. This was really really well written. I have to say, this has to be one of the most beautiful/tragic thing I have read on this site. It was beautifully written and I could really feel the emotion Lorcan is feeling. I was crying from the first paragraph and I'm still teary.

I'm also not a big fan of next-gen, but I thought this was really good. You make writing next-gen look very easy. I also don't read horror/dark so I have no idea how you did on that aspect.

Overall greaat job!! 10/10 :D

~Maggie *squish*

Author's Response: Aww thank youuu! That means so much :) Though sorry I made you cry.. :-/

I don't write next gen, or horror/dark a lot...so I'm glad that (at least one of them) was good. Thank you!

~Sara *squish*


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Review #7, by ariellem Lost in the Darkness

21st September 2011:
This one-shot was emotion filled, and seemed quite realistic, so good for you on that.

However I could have done with a bit more of explanation, why exactly did Lysander die for one?

All in all, you did a pretty good good.

Author's Response: Thank you!

Yeah, it was meant to be a bit of a mystery o.O (orIdidn'treallyhaveareasonthoughtof) xD.

Thank you!

~Sara


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Review #8, by BrightStar Lost in the Darkness

7th September 2011:
Hi!

I really liked this. The scamanders arent characters I think about much, but I really felt for Lorcan here.

Actually, who i really connected to here was Lily. I thought she was so strong, and so good to Lorcan, even when he didnt want her around.

his talks with his twin were so poignant and well written, well done! I'm glad I read this :D

Author's Response: Thank you! Yeah, I don't think about them often either, but it was for a challenge..so I'm glad it came out well!

Thank you so much!

~Sara


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Review #9, by Coley Lost in the Darkness

6th September 2011:
This was so incredibly sad. I had tears streaming down my face whilst reading a few of the sections.

The grieving process, in my opinion, was done really well, it showed a real transition in Lorcan's emotions and how he coped. I can't begin to imagine how it would feel to lose a sibling, let alone a twin.

The only things I would point out were that there was a few errors in your grammar, nothing completely distracting from the piece but enough to notice if you look close enough. Nothing that a thorough look over couldn't fix. Another was that I would have loved to see a little bit more in each 'section', maybe a little interaction with Luna and Rolf would have been nice.

Another thing I loved was the progressing relationship with Lily, I like how she was the only one that could console him and how she helped him heal. The last 'section' was incredibly moving, and was done superbly.

This is really great and I really enjoyed how the emotion was so raw and seemed so very real.

Author's Response: Aww I'm sorry I made you cry :/. Though that was sort of my point...xD. I'm glad you thought it was transitioned well...I;ve never lost anyone close to me, so this was a bit difficult to get right.

Yes, I need to go proofread this don't I...I shall edit! (if I ever have time...)

Thank you so much for reading and reviewing (even though I asked you to :D)

~Sara


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Review #10, by IwRiTe4mE Lost in the Darkness

4th September 2011:
Wow. This was so beautiful. It really was. You did really well with the genre in my opinion, and you had me in tears by the end. This was just such a beautiful piece. Well done.
~Kat

Author's Response: Aww, thank you so much! That means so much :) Thanks for reading and reviewing!

~Sara


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