Reading Reviews for Unsaid
5 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Breaker girl  one day you will love me

12th May 2016:
This is literally amazing and made me feel so many emotions. I love all you stories and I want nothing more than for this to become a full story. It's such good writing and such an interesting premise.

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Review #2, by ilovehpfanfiction one day you will love me

11th February 2014:
Holy cow. I think that...was the most...wozie thing I've ever read. So heartwarming like it gave me the silly smiles. Amazing. Perfect description. Love it. you're an awesome writer.

Author's Response: Oh gosh. I totally don't deserve such a nice review. Especially for this. I have actually never read this over because of how bad it is. I like can't bring myself to acknowledge its existence.

But thank you so much for reviewing! You are awesome and way too kind :)

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Review #3, by muggleborninNZ one day you will love me

4th August 2013:
This isn't awful. It's actually quite good in the way everything just flows. I like the natural feel to it and I'd love to see this developed into a full length story :)

Author's Response: Oh gosh I can't even tell you how many times I've considered deleting this oneshot that's how much I loathe it. But thank you so much for being kind despite how terrible it is. You're awesome :)

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Review #4, by flufff one day you will love me

26th August 2011:
That was actually really good! I read another one for this challenge, but this one was great. I liked it a lot, with the "things left unsaid" kind of thing, and just everything! I loved the first and last parts, they're just so blunt and, I don't know, everything was just really well-written. Great job! ;D

Keep writing x flufff

Also! If you ever get the time, could you R&R my fanfic "Darkest Night"? It's a Dramione, so I don't know if you like them or not, but if you're interested, I would really appreciate it. Thank you! :D


Author's Response: Thank you :)

I'm so happy you liked it! I was a bit iffy after it was posted because I do have some major cringe-worthy moments in this story that I wish I could change but can't, so it's good to know you liked it!

And thinking it's well written? Honestly you flatter me way too much.

I'll read any type of pairing, so when I get the chance I'll definitely R&R you fanfic. Thank you so much for reviewing!

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Review #5, by Christine_Nighting one day you will love me

25th August 2011:
I entered this challenge too. Your entry is really wonderful! You portray the character's feelings well and it creates a haunting atmosphere. One of the things I really like about this story is the fact that several times towards the beginning you had rhymes.

"Things were left unsaid and our feelings were left unresolved and now I have nothing to stop the thoughts swirling through my head." There's a wonderful little rhyme between unsaid and head.

"Instead, everything is brick walls and closed doors and locked drawers." It isn't exactly rhyming, but it does have a bit of a rhyme to it that rolls off the tongue.

"It's like everything has changed since that night in seventh year, when I finally held my breath and took the leap you didn't want to hear." Seventh year and hear. Seems like you're creating a poem in your head. ;)

This piece does have run on sentences, but I think that it works pretty good since you do have the poem quality going already.

Ooh! One more thing.

"Maybe one day you can love me. Maybe one day you can tell me how you really feel. Maybe one day we cannot leave our words unsaid, and face them head on." Parallel structure. Always a great way to give a bit of attitude to a written piece.

Great job! This was certainly a pleasure to read :) Best of luck to you in the challenge!


Author's Response: Wow thank you! I'm so glad you thought I could portray the characters feelings well. I was worried she might have been a bit contradictory since I didn't actually get to read over what I posted.

I'm not going to lie though, until you posted this review I had no idea that my lines rhymed. Although I do have a tendency to like when things sound.. right together if that makes sense. I used to write poems like when I was in like second grade so maybe that's where it came from?

I do understand I have a lot of run on sentences. I tend to love them because they're so long and rambling but the ones in my story are probably very confusing.

Anyways, thank you so much for reviewing! It makes me happy that you liked reading it, despite the fact that it's pretty rough around the edges.


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