Reading Reviews for My Last
9 Reviews Found

Review #1, by DracoFerret11 My Last

20th June 2015:
Hello there! This is DarkRose from the forums, here to review for you for the House Cup 2015! So, let's go over things:

Grammar/Spelling: I only noticed a few errors in this. Notably, "To see you on last time?" should be "one last time," and "you only nods" should be "nod."

Plot: This was interesting! I don't read much about Cho, since she really doesn't seem to be a popular character. It's hard for me to forget the Madame Puddifoot part of the book! But I thought this was an interesting glimpse into her life. It's intriguing to think how she and Harry would act around each other after years apart. I think her reaction was pretty accurate. There's nothing you can really say at a funeral...

Characterization: I think Cho's life was a sad one in this story. She seemed to have lived a very lonely existence. But you wrote her well. When she was thinking about how no one could have compared to how great Cedric and Harry were, I thought that seemed really realistic. It would have been difficult for her to see someone else as worthy or equal to them. Which is sad.

Emotions: The feelings for Ginny's death seemed really real. I thought it seemed that Cho really did feel bad about Ginny dying, even if she saw her as a rival. But I went to a funeral recently, and the way you described it was pretty accurate. :/

Descriptions: I would have loved to see even more details about how things looked, sounded, smelled, felt, etc. I think that would have really brought the story to life for me. Nonetheless, though, it was good. :)

Overall, this was a nice story. I'm still not a huge Cho fan, but you made me feel bad for her, so that's something. ;) Good job!

--Emily (DarkRose)

Ravenclaw, House Cup 2015

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Review #2, by TreacleTart My Last

20th June 2015:
Hey there!

I'm here for House Cup 2015- Amazing Race Round 2 - Gryffindor!

This was a very interesting look into what happened to Cho Chang after the war. I always imagined that she would've moved on, but this seems fitting. I mean after everything that she had been through, how could anyone really ever truly move on from something like that? I don't think it's possible.

I didn't expect Harry to play as large a role in her life as he did here, but it makes sense. I always thought Cedric had been the one for her and Harry was just a sort of rebound or a bit of comfort in her depression. Either way, you've done a good job of showing just how affected by it all Cho truly is.

A small bit of constructive criticism. I did notice a few small typos.

you on last time? – one last time?

would be forever be second best- would forever be second

and you only nods- only nod

I thought this was a beautiful, bittersweet ode to love and how strong it can be. Great work on this! It was really moving!


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Review #3, by typewriter My Last

17th July 2013:

That was fantastic. What a clever idea to write about Cho. She is often forgotten, at least by me. I wonder what it would be like to recover from Cedric and then Harry. She really wasn't mentioned all too much after Harry moved on to Ginny in the books. This was a brilliant look into her life, her own misfortune during Harry's. It was sad to get inside her character and see that she hadn't ever moved on, despite the years having passed. Your writing was beautiful and made me truly feel for her. I loved the pacing and the tragic tone of it. Great work!


Author's Response: Hello! Thank you so much for leaving yet another lovely review!

I'm so glad that you liked this! I haven't read too many stories about Cho myself, and those that I have read tend to portray her in more of a negative light. However, she's still a very interesting character to explore because, as you said, one of her boyfriends was murdered while her other (very famous) boyfriend was present.

Thank you so much for the compliments! I'm very happy that you liked this one-shot and, once again, thank you for reading and reviewing! :D

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Review #4, by patronus_charm My Last

5th February 2013:
I liked at first the narrartor was rather ambigious as it meant that I could try and figure out who it was, and it was only until I was about 1/4 of the way through before I realised it was Cho.

I really liked this perspective of her, as I and I think most other people tend to forget about her, and how she may have felt for Harry, as she's always portrayed in a bad light, so it was nice to get her side of the story for once:)

I felt so bad for Cho that she never recovered from Harry breaking up with her. As he did treat her badly, I mean her boyfriend died less than a year ago, and he has a go at her for mentioning him. This story has really helped me realise that Harry did paint Cho all that nicely.

This was just a lovely one-shot, and it made me feel really sad for Cho, as I think she does have a negative reputation, that she doesn't really deserve, so it's taught me to not judge her too harshly, Kiana :)

Author's Response: Hello! Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!

I'm glad that you enjoyed the style in which this was written! It was an interesting perspective to write from since, as you've said, she's often portrayed in a bad light and we never really got the opportunity to understand her. To write from her perspective as a grown woman, to imagine her as - not exactly obsessed with Harry but certainly fond of her memories of their relationship... It was an experience. :)

Thanks once again for reviewing! I really appriciate you taking the time to leave your thoughts! :)

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Review #5, by Woodstock My Last

20th January 2012:
So this is supposed to be about Cho meeting with Harry after Ginny passed away?

Author's Response: Yes- I'm glad that you were able to figure that out. Thanks for reviewing.

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Review #6, by Beeezie My Last

7th January 2012:
Hey, this is Beeezie, here with your 1/15 review!

I actually have mixed feelings about this fic.

In terms of your prose, this was terrific. You did a great job of showing Cho's reflections on her relationship with Harry - I was completely convinced by the emotions you described her as feeling at the time of their relationship and after. Her desire to see him on the pitch, the reasons she latched onto him, the fact that she didn't want to know whether Ginny kissed better than her… I thought that it was a really realistic depiction of how a teenager in Cho's position might have felt.

My problem was with a few of the supporting details and, more importantly, with the translation of that past to the present.

For example - and this is a minor detail, but I think that often minor details can be just as important as major ones in making a story really strong - you mention that Cedric was Cho's first crush (unless I misinterpreted the sentence). That just seemed a little odd to me, given that she was 15 or 16 when they started going out. Maybe you think of her as liking him for awhile before they actually start going out, but if so, I'd have liked to see you explicitly say that, because as is, I think that needs a bit more depth.

The other problem I had was that I felt like Cho's reflections 80 years later were a little inconsistent. On one hand, her connection with Cedric is coming across as more important to her and more meaningful than her relationship with Harry. That's fair, and it makes sense. On the other, your description of her actions since the war seem to be saying that she's never really gotten over Harry. I think that you can make that case, too. I even think that you can do both at the same time, but here, I feel like you just lacked that extra step to really portray that as strongly as I think you could have. Does that make sense?

Again, I did think that your prose and your take on how Cho felt at the time was great, and I also thought that you portrayed her brief conversation with Harry quite well. There were just a couple little things that I thought got a little lost.

Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad that you liked the way I showed Cho's feelings because that was the main point of this story.

I see what you mean about Cho's crush on Cedric. It didn't come across as strange to me for her to have her first crush at fifteen/sixteen because I know people who haven't felt those emotions until that point in time, but I do agree that I could elaborate a little on her emotions during that point in time, to show that she was serious about her feelings for Cedric. For the girl that I picture Cho as being, I do agree that there would have to be some explanation behind why Cedric was her first crush.

I think that I understand what you're saying; you mean to say that I should explain why Cho hasn't truly gotten over Harry and tried to fall in love again. If that is true, then I understand where you're coming from. I think that I tried at the time to explain the depth of her emotions for Harry as well as Cedric but I guess it didn't come across as well as I'd hoped. I will try to express the depth of her attachment to both boys more clearly.

Thanks once again for reviewing- I will definitely try and fix the little problems you spotted!

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Review #7, by Livi_777 My Last

30th August 2011:
Oh, that's so sad. I've never really thought about how Cho felt after she and Harry broke up. I would never imagined this. Its a lovely story.

Author's Response: Thanks so much for taking the time to review! I never thought about it either until I had the inspiration for this story. I'm so glad you enjoyed it.

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Review #8, by honoraryweasley My Last

23rd August 2011:
Honoraryweasleyy from the forums here with your requested review. Firstly, I have to comment on the story's name and summary - they really drew me in. I also adored the last line of the story.

Usually, I do a rundown of spelling and grammar errors and suggestions that I have, but I don't think I'll do that this time! It's only a couple of small things that could be easily solved by a little run-through, or maybe a beta..?

But anyway, that's not the important part of the story. I found this really touching. The pace, the length, everything was just right. If it was a little longer I'd recommend a little more dialogue in between - even if just a recount of something said before - and I'd still recommend that you CONSIDER that, but to be honest I think that having the only dialogue be between Harry and Cho makes it all the more powerful. You used it really well. I also appreciate how you didn't have Harry and Cho reconnect or look back or confess anything about anything, because that's not how things happen in real life. Instead you had Cho do it privately and silently, which is so much more realistic.

I know that a whole bunch of people really don't like Cho, but I feel SO bad for her. And this made me feel even worse, because I'd never actually thought about Cho/Cedric as people who had inside jokes and hiding places and arguments and everything.

I don't think I have anything to suggest to you for improvement! Do consider putting in just a word or two of dialogue. For example: '"*insert words*", he would say'. To some readers like me, who really strive on dialogue, it would be kind of a breath of fresh air ;)

But you did a really, really great job with this! You characterized both Cho and Harry well, and Cho's reasoning in particular was easily understandable and made me pity her even further. Nicely done, and I hope these comments have helped. :)

Author's Response: Thanks so much for your review!

I'm so glad you liked the summary and title. I was puzzling on those for ages- couldn't seem to come up with good ones. As for the spelling, I'll go and reread the story. I thought I caught all of them... oh well.

I'm so glad this affected you in some way. And that you thought it was well done! Dialogue is something people have commented on in previous stories, and I do try to include it more. However, I agree with you that the short amount of dialogue makes it more powerful.

This story just kind of wrote itself. When I got to the end, it didn't feel right for them to reconnect.

I don't have strong feelings about Cho, which probably helped in writing this. I didn't have any negative feelings towards her, so I was better able to empathize with her (possible) feelings.

Your comments really did help. I will definitely think about the dialogue- the "past words" seems to be an easier thing to work into the piece. Thanks once again for reviewing!

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Review #9, by academica My Last

19th August 2011:
Hey! Here with your review :)

So I thought this was really simple but really great. You explored the character of Cho very deeply and you wrote a very poignant piece. I really pitied her, knowing that she had finally gotten her one chance to reconnect with her lost love and found it to be ultimately woefully unsatisfying. At the same time, I pitied Harry, knowing that he has to say goodbye to the love of his life, which is never an easy thing; you also characterized him appropriately. I found Cho's reasoning for wanting to be with Harry sensible and interesting; it's so sad to think that she can't be happy because both of her chances at love have come and gone. I don't think anyone would have predicted that for the popular, pretty girl from Ravenclaw that Harry once fantasized about.

The story flowed easily and smoothly, and your writing was free of errors. I always love to see a little more imagery in a story, but at the same time, this one was just fine in its mere simplicity. I can't really find anything to critique; this was just another example of your very fine work! I've never been big into Harry and Ginny but your work is part of why I've been warming to the ship a little bit, wanting to explore their pairing a little more fully.

Great job! Thanks for requesting another review, and you know what to do with your next new story :) As always, I hope my comments are helpful!


Author's Response: Thanks so much for taking the time to review (and so quickly too!)

I'm so glad you feel that way about this story. I'm glad I was able to get the feelings across well. I was a little worried because it was so short, yet I couldn't see a way to lengthen it while still having it flow well. I'm glad you liked her reasoning- it's always interesting to look at things from another point of view. It's also interesting to imagine what might happen to characters in their future. Cho's future in this story definitely wasn't expected...

Thanks so much for the compliment! By the way, I'm not too fond of Harry/Ginny either- they've just tended to suit my stories and so I've written them in.

Thanks once again for reviewing and I wil definitely rerequest! I have another story in the queue at the moment. And yes, your comments are most definitely helpful!

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