Hi! Since you left such a lovely review on my Remus/Tonks, I wanted to return the favor with yours! Especially since you took up the premise of the time between Remus leaving to go fight his final fight and what drove Tonks to follow him and leave her child behind.

These first few paragraphs here describing her raw emotion, the panic she is starting to feel, really draws me in. I can almost feel it in myself if I let it. I love it when a writer can do that: put me in the character’s place.

It’s kind of funny how your flashback picks up where my story ended off. I like to think that we’ve mind-melded and gotten coordinated on our stories! :) Also, that’s a bit harsh that her dad’s there butting in!

Oh, this good-bye to her son. The amount of time you take in describing him to the reader with the flow of her thoughts just shows how much she does love him and gives credence to what she is about to do.

This was sad but lovely. I love fill-in type stories just as much as AU and fanon type stories!

xChar

Author's Response: Hello! Thanks so much for coming back over and returning the favor. I was in love with your Tonks/Remus, and it did seem to fit with mine well too [if that makes sense? :p ]

And I wanted the pure panic of what to do, the loss of thoughts and of feelings. It's a weird sensation, when you choose between one life or another. I've never had to make the choice, but that's what I thought it would feel like. And I'm glad I pulled you in. I was hoping to suck people in and make them feel as if they were Tonks.

Haha, I hadn't even remembered about the flashback until I read this. I then went back and re-read it and proceeded to laugh. We defintely coordinated our stories unintentionally!

And I just see her dad as protective: not wanting his daughter to get hurt agian. A little harsh? Yes. But I think in a way, Remus sort of deserved it [Erg, I hate saying that :p ]

But I'm really glad you enjoyed this. I had fun writing it! Thanks again for the review! It made my day!

~Grimmerz

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I like this. It's sweet and really shows a lot about Tonks (a character who I love). For an unedited story, it is very impressive. For any story, it is very good. It is short. I'd like to see a little more on Remus/Tonks. The end bit with Andromeda is a bit confusing. I can tell they're supposed to be close and can read each other, but I find it hard to believe anyone can say so much without any words. Overall, though, I really like this story and am glad I got to read it!

Author's Response: Tonks is pretty much my favorite character too! That's one of the major reasons I wrote this, though it killed me having her decide between her son and her husband. It was hard, but I accomplished it. And it's hard to have too much more Remus within this, just because of Tonks leaving, but I have been thinking of haivng a story from Remus' point of view for when Tonks finds him at Hogwarts.

ANYWAYS. I'm glad you enjoyed this! It was fun to write! Thanks so much for the lovely review!
~Grimmerz

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Hi there! *team blue*

This was so gorgeous! I absolutely loved the Tonks you characterised, and how you got her pain and frustration across to us. It seeped through in your description, but I love how you described Tonks noticing the little details about her husband, because it showed how much pain she was in.

Also, I think you had the parallels of the two situations done so well! It really made me empathise towards Tonks, because of the emotional split she was having; the last scene was just so sad! D: The way she left her mum to look after Teddy... the repetition of the first and last line really emphasized how they were being left, first her and then her son, to go away for the war.

I'm sorry I don't really have any crit, and I haven't been useful - it was just so gorgeous! Um... maybe exchange mom for mum? *shrugs* you wrote Tonks' stream of consiousness really beautifully, and I loved it so much :D

~Lottie

Author's Response: Hello!

I'm glad her emotions came across great for you. I was hoping to get those emotions deeply absorbed into the description because I have been in a simalarish situation and I just wanted that pain to come across. And it's always in the little details you notice that loss the most. So it was definitely something I worked in.

And I know! I felt so bad writing the end of this story! I knew it was going to happen from the start, but it broke my hear to write it! I'm such a huge Tonks/Remus shipper and I'm a fan of both characters, so it was hard. And I actually wrote the first and last line first. From there I just filled in the middle. And it just, it went.

I'm really glad you enjoyed this! I loved writing this! And I will go through and eit mom to mum. It helps with the writing just a little!

Thanks again for your review! It made me smile!
~Grimmerz

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I really enjoyed this short story. I think you did a wonderful job exploring Tonks' feelings after Remus had left to go fight; the pain, the anxiety...it's all well-described and I could feel that panic too.

I think it was really smart to go back to the first time Remus abandoned her when he found out she was pregnant with Teddy. It acts as a comparison to how she isn't going to let him leave her this time, that she's going to fight for him, with him to ensure Teddy grows up in a war-free world. The innocence she sees in Teddy is precious and I love how she holds onto that when she makes her decision.

For something so short, you really packed in a lot of emotion so kudos to you for a job well-done. :)

Author's Response: Hello!

I'm very glad you enjoyed this story! I really do enjoy writing and exploring the feelings of different characters at different points in time. I want thier pain, their sorrow, their worry to become real and fit the characters. And with this story, I got the added bonus of writing one of my favorite characters!

Thanks so much for the review! I'm glad you enjoyed!
~Grimmerz

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This was a heartbreaking and yet adorable story -- I'm coming to like Tonks and Remus more and more as I read more fic about them, although on a strictly-canon basis I'm not a huge fan. But that's what I love about fan fiction -- getting to see other perspectives, other viewpoints on relationships, is really eye-opening. And honestly, just really fun to read. :D

For stream-of-consciousness, you managed to keep focus very well, and I commend you on that! I've read a fair amount of stream-of-consciousness writers in my time (Cormac McCarthy, William Faulkner) and sometimes I get a bit lost in their stuff. This was easy to keep track of, so bravo! And the way you wrote emotion, especially Tonks's, but really everybody's, was so well-done, too.

A few things I noticed --

The words tightened my lungs, preventing them from bringing anymore air into my system. ('Anymore' should be separated into two words.)

It was only mere days after the full moon, and I know he didn’t get the wolvesbane this time. ('Wolvesbane' should be 'wolfsbane'.)

I say, my voice high pitch, though barely loud enough to be heard. ('Pitch' should change to 'pitched'.)

Honestly, I really enjoyed this story -- I just cannot get over Tonks's emotions, you've really made me feel for her. This was a pleasure to read, and I hope I get the chance to drop by and read another one of your stories soon!

Author's Response: I was really unsure how to go about writing stream-of-consciousness just because it was so different than what I'm used to writing, but I'm really glad you like it! I was trying to sort of keep focus, but I also just sort of wrote, without thinking about it too much.

I think that's where the emotion comes in too. I just wrote from a darker place in my mind wihtout fretting too much about it and it came out well. And Tonks/Remus...well, I'm only mildly obsessed with them. So I just had to write them ;) [Though I must agree...fan fiction suits them much better than the novels...]

And I'll be sure to go through and edit! I haven't really read through it at all since posting, so editing would be good ;) And thank you soo much for reading and reviewing! I'm so happy you enjoyed reading this!

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Oh, wow. I feel so bad for Tonks. You really brought that pain to life, since she was always a side character in the books. Poor Teddy, never getting to know the awesome mom he has.

Author's Response: Hey,
Yeah, my whole goal in this story was to bring Tonks' pain of choosing to go after Remus and leave Teddy behind to a different light and make it more noticed. And I'm really glad i managed to do just that. Thanks for reading and the lovely review!
~Grimmerz

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