Reading Reviews for Yours Truly,
  
45 Reviews Found

Review #1, by EverDiggory The Report

26th April 2012:
You, my dearest darling, are now a victim of my random reviews!

I liked how Hermione was in character, she wasn't all thrilled to be apart of this Magic Matching!

Ron): why.oh! Darn you for making me sad over Ron's death!

I'm interested to see where you take this! You've got me hooked with your wonderful descriptions, and incredible way that you pulled me into the story!

xoxo

Ever

Author's Response: I am honoured you chose me, dahling. xD

Oh of course not. I definitely found it funny while writing though. Ginny would definitely do it. (:

I'm sorry. I always get sad when I write about Ron in this story.

I'm glad I've got you hooked. Thanks for coming by. (:

Brittanique


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Review #2, by Maelody The Invitation

20th April 2012:
I'm so sorry! I don't think I realized you had more than two chapters up! lol

The last line of their invitation made me chuckle, too. I liked the whole wedding invitation, it was such a wonderful idea and great detail! :) Your memories make me smile so much, and my heart aches for Hermione. I am curious as to what happened to Narcissa, though. Sorry, for the quick review, but I have a few things to do! Great job! I hope to continue! :)

Author's Response: Hey! No worries. (:

I'm glad you liked the wrackspurts thing.. I had fun writing it. I had a lot of fun writing the whole thing. It's getting harder and harder to write these flashbacks. That means they will be fewer and far between, but we'll also get to see what happened to Ron in the next few chapters. (:

Thanks a bunch.
Brittanique


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Review #3, by ewsoucf7 The Invitation

7th April 2012:
It didnt seem forced at all. I think you did a really good job.

Ron's inner argument in Paris...was he going to propose? I really hope he was...it would have been sweet...but then...if he didn't do it then would he have actually done it? Argh! Look at what your writing is doing to me...

I feel awful for Hermione...she seems so depressed, though I do think it is time she moved on. Also, did you purposely not go back to the ministry letter which was waiting for her? I wonder why.

Cannot wait for some updates, and feel free to contact me at any time for a review. =]

Author's Response: I'm glad it didn't seem forced. This chapter took a lot out of me. I don't know why it was so hard to write, but it was..

Maybe, maybe not. (: You'll have to come back and see what is going on in his head. xD I'm super glad my writing has impacted you! Just don't let it drive you crazy because the next chapter is being written.

She is depressed, but there will be some budging in the right direction shortly! And yes. You will see why in the next chapter. xD

Thanks for coming by!
Brittanique


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Review #4, by ewsoucf7 The Patient

7th April 2012:
I loved the exchange between the two. Also it is very refreshing to see Draco a little disheveled post-war. Quite often he is still as handsome and dreamy as ever, so it is nice to see something a little different.

I love that Hermione didn't want to speak to him too. I think that her resentment was nicely balanced with her bedside manner as she spoke to Mrs Malfoy. I confess that I am very intrigued as to what happened to her, and to Ron, and why Draco looks as though he is not taking care of himself.

=]

Author's Response: I'm glad you like my Draco. I never really cared for the ever-handsome and always-suave post-war Draco, hence he is the way he is here. With his mother in the hospital and probably the still-present hatred towards his family, I don't know who could handle that while being Mr. Awesome.

I'm glad you liked their interaction. I was hoping to get across that this relationship of theirs isn't going to happen right away. Both of them need time to lick their respective wounds in solitude.

All questions will be answered soon!
Brittanique


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Review #5, by ewsoucf7 The Memories

7th April 2012:
Review 41...hopefully...

Aww such a sad chapter...yet sort of happy. I loved that Ron took her to Paris on a whim. That is so romantic. I wish somebody did that for me! I think it was nice to include the flashback so that we get an insight to how things were before the incident...though admittedly I am intrigued by what actually happened to Ron.

=]

Author's Response: I know right? Look at him go. I personally didn't think he had it in him.. It must be his head trauma.. Either way, it was a nice gesture. XD

We will definitely be finding out what happened to Ron soon enough. Hope you stick around for it. (:

Brittanique


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Review #6, by ewsoucf7 The Report

7th April 2012:
Yay 40th review! I ask myself why I haven't read this before. I love Dramonie fics! Also, I am glad you said the whole story isn't going to be depressing. ;]

I think it was a really good introduction. I like that you haven't given too much away either. The dating thing is a great idea, as I imagine it could conjure up some very funny situations *cough* Malfoy *cough*

Sorry I'm going to mess up your 40th review now...cause I'll review each chapter...which will take it to 43...sorry. =]

Author's Response: YAY! Thanks for coming by! I'm glad you liked it. And yes, soon enough the story wont be all this depressing. I found it necessary to show change in Hermione by the end so that it doesn't end up like "Oh! Yeah, they're together because I said so."

You can mess up my 40th review anytime XD
Brittanique


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Review #7, by Maelody The Memories

6th April 2012:
A head injury then? D: How sad! I wonder how he got it :( this chapter was wonderful, by the way. And the memory scene was so beautiful. Once I realized it was a memory and she had it taken from her, I about cried. I am eager to know the rest of this story. Great job! 9/10

Author's Response: Thanks! I'm ecstatic I got your emotions on a roller coaster. Is that horrible? I don't know, but it's amazing to hear as a writer.

Come back soon!
Brittanique


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Review #8, by Maelody The Report

5th April 2012:
Plot line: Weren't you the one who just told me you don't write darker things? Well, I find it hard to believe because you do a wonderful job describing how people feel in terrible times. However, I am extremely intrigued in what you have going on with how she was there when he died (I'm assuming anyway since it was 'her fault'). It is a good plot so far by what I can tell, and I am extremely excited to continue with this. Reading the letter, I thought this would be a fun comedy, and then BOOM it got sad lol. Good job, playing with my emotions like that. Again, your description is marvelous and I love every describing word you used.


Characterization:
I loved Ginny, because I know she will stay strong no matter what. However, just because Harry is so close to Hermione (I would assume he is even just a little more close with her than Ginny, though I don't doubt they are extremely close either), I don't see him allowing Ginny to do something like that. Or at least, asking her to help Hermione get better some other way without dating. Unless, of course, it is slightly behind his back? Otherwise, Hermione was done wonderfully. I truly think that would be the way she would break down, minus saying that she was fine. I think she would have come to terms with herself long before she admits in this story rather than just admitting her state now.

Spelling and grammar:
It was wonderful, there were just a few missing words (more like words that were either unfinished or a typo). Such as "as" instead of "and" that was accidentally put in there. Your grammar was good either way, so good job! :)

General liking of the story:
I really want to continue reading this story. I think your description is wonderful, and I really want to know how Ron died. It will be interesting to see how this dating thing works (assuming she actually does look in to it), and I hope to see some Harry really soon. Good job! 8/10!

Author's Response: Hey! Yes, I was the one who said that. I figured this was a different kind of "dark" story. But now that I think about it, I guess it isn't. Just manifests a bit differently. Thanks!

Harry is away on some Auror business at the moment. But in the next few chapters we will see him. Ginny kinda made him help her with it. Lol. I'm glad you like Ginny and Hermione. Never really be good with female characters.

I'll have to look it over again to catch the errors, thanks for pointing them out.

I'm thrilled that you like the story so far. Ron's death will be the center of most of the beginning so you'll find out fairly shortly what's going on. XD And yes, Harry will be around soon too.

Thanks!
Brittanique


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Review #9, by ScorpiusRose17 The Invitation

4th April 2012:
Hi there!

I have been meaning to leave a review for this chapter for quite some time now...so here I am.

I really liked all the description. I thought you did a brillinat job painting a vivid picture of what was going on. I liked getting the chance to see more into Hermione's thoughts and mind. I felt sad though. You did a great job making her emotions believable.

I am still anxious about what is going to happen mostly because I think you're doing such a great job writing such a great story. You're building this suspense that I just cannot describe.

Keep up the great work and I can't wait to see what else happens! =)

-SR17

Author's Response: Thanks!

I've been trying to work on getting more physical descriptions in as some people think mine tend to be lacking. Hopefully I did a decent job. XD

I'm working on chapter five at the moment so the wait shouldn't be that long!

Thanks again.
Brittanique


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Review #10, by adluvshp The Invitation

30th March 2012:
Hello :D

this was a neat little chapter, i liked it, especially with all the descriptions. we got to see some more insight into hermione, which was nice. i like the way the story is progressing. do keep writing!

10/10

cheers!
AD

green with envy 2012

Author's Response: Hey thanks for coming by.

I'm glad you liked it. I'm trying to work on my descriptions as I've noticed they were lacking.

Thanks again.
Brittanique


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Review #11, by annyluvesmalfoy The Report

29th March 2012:
The idea of this story is so wonderful!

Author's Response: Thanks for taking the time to review!

Glad you like it. xD
Brittanique.


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Review #12, by HuffGriffSlyRaven The Invitation

29th March 2012:
First to review! Yay, I've been waiting expectantly for you to post! A couple of notes, in the first sentence you say "suspected dreams," but I think that you mean "expected dreams." Also, you call the first owl the "ministry owl" and you probably want to capitalize the "m" as it is a proper name. I got too much into the story to notice if there were anymore things to change. It is so good, please keep writing! Thank you!

Author's Response: Hey! Thanks for pointing that out. I'll have to look at that and fix them up. Thanks for the review and I'm so glad you've been enjoying the story.

Brittanique


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Review #13, by SerpentineOffering The Invitation

29th March 2012:
What a wonderful chapter! I really am loving this story so far, it's really well done!! I'm also quite interested in what the other letter was about.. the ministry one! Can't wait to see that. I love the parting at the end of the invitation, so like Luna! Fantastic. Can't wait for the next one! Great job!!

Author's Response: You're going to find out about the Ministry letter soon enough.. In the next chapter to be exact.. So stick around and you'll be in for a treat. ;)

I had a good laugh writing that last bit. Figured I had to add a bit of Luna's amazing character into the invitation, otherwise it would just be a bore, you know? That and I needed to pick Hermione's spirits up a bit before the end. I don't want all the chapters here to be depressing. XD

Thanks for coming by!
Brittanique


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Review #14, by SerpentineOffering The Patient

28th March 2012:
I really enjoyed this chapter, I especially enjoyed how you've portrayed Draco. I like that he wasn't pristine or acting incredibly cold, the love for Narcissa really showed in your writing, very subtle but also very noticeable.. if that makes any sort of sense! :)
Great chapter! I absolutely love your writing! Can't wait for the next one!!

Author's Response: I'm so glad you liked my Draco. He is my absolute favourite character to write. xD I especially love him in this kind of state, is that terrible of me? To have all my characters in pain? Haha.

Thanks for coming by!
Brittanique


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Review #15, by SerpentineOffering The Memories

28th March 2012:
Another fantastic chapter! I'm really interested in where this story is going! Honestly, I really don't think I could give you any constructive criticism because I wouldn't change a single thing! You are incredibly talented!! I loved it!

-Bradi

Author's Response: You're making me blush! I really appreciate you coming over and reviewing all my chapters.

And I'm glad you find it a good story. Thanks!
Brittanique


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Review #16, by SerpentineOffering The Report

27th March 2012:
A wizarding dating company!? This is the first story I have read with that idea and I think it's brilliant! What a great chapter! I love the way you have written Hermione, the sadness that she is feeling is really well written, when I am reading that I can't help but feel for her! On to the next chapter I go! Fantastic job!!

- Bradi

Author's Response: I was ecstatic when the idea came to me because I found it original, it makes me happy to see that I thought right.

Thanks for liking my Hermione. I'm glad you can feel for her.

Thanks.
Brittanique


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Review #17, by LivingFairytale The Report

14th March 2012:
Hiya! It's Livingfairytale from the forums with your requested review. I'm really excited to read & review your story (Dramione! yay!) so let's get started!

The way you started off was magnificent. I really liked the letter, and I immediately understood where it was all about. It gave me a clear idea from whose point of view I was reading, and what was happening. Wonderfully done!

The characterization was spot on! I loved the way you wrote Hermione, and added in some new quirks. I can definitely see her character change a little, especially after Ron's death. I also liked Ginny (I actually hate her in the books lol), you've written them both very good.

Overall, a very good chapter to start with. I'm a huge Dramione shipper, I mean opposites attract right? Please do feel free to re-request anytime you want. I absolutely love your story thus far and I'm so curious what happened to Ron. Keep it up!
x Livingfairytale

Author's Response: Hey sorry for the long wait on this response.

I like that you think the way I started was good. I was a bit worried with starting it off with a letter, sometimes that can get a bit... cliche.

I'm also glad you like my Hermione. I've said it before, and I'll continue to say it.. Females aren't my strong point so it is always good to hear good things about them. Don't worry, I hate Ginny in the books too.

Thanks for coming by!
Brittanique


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Review #18, by LeCygneNoir The Patient

12th March 2012:
Hey, this is LeCygne, with your review. I'll make a single review for the three chapters. As I said, I preoccupy mostly with general pace, plotting, and characterization.

To be completely honest very fast: I'm not a great fan of your story. Not that it's bad or anything, but I'm definitely not an Hermione fan, particularly not in the very hard position you put her in.

To be fair though, your writing is pretty good. The mix between self-anger and self-pity that Hermione feels is leaking through the text. I also liked your Draco, who's exactly the "new man" with relent of his previous arrogance he should be.
So, there's not much to say about characterization.

I'll not be that dithyrambic with the pacing though. It is alright, and the text is quite pleasant to read. But you've chosen a very slow pace, wich I've no problem with, and it made of constant actions. There are descriptions in your text, but they're subbordinated to actions.
I think that ambiance also emanates from descriptions made for themselves, particularly in slow paced fiction. The world should have an independent rythm from your character, it may be as slow if it's seen from her eyes, or faster if you want to oppose it. But for now, it seems like the whole worlds is part of Hermione's neurastheny.

I realize this is a bit harsh, because actually it's not that terrible -it's even good. But it's easier explained in the extremes.

Also, your writing could be a little lighter sometimes, in style if not in ambiance. But that's very hard to point out precisely, so I won't dare to. Just be aware that you can stay slow with light sentences.

As a critic, I should've rated your text 8/10. But I'm also a reader, so it'll be 7/10.

Keep up the good work, and happy writing.

Author's Response: Hey there! Sorry for the long wait for this response. I really appreciate your honesty, I've been attempting to work on what you've said here so I'll make this brief.

- I'm not usually all that great at writing women or grief so I decided to do it to challenge myself. I'm glad you like my Draco though, he is one of my favourite characters to write.
- I chose a slow pace so that I could make the fic as believable as possible as many these days throw them together for the sake of being together. I want their relationship to be as natural as it would be in real life.
- I've also been working on my descriptions, and finding that happy medium between emotions and physical things.
- As this is third person limited (to Hermione) I wanted the writing to somewhat reflect her emotions. It wont always be this slow and "emo"

Don't feel bad about being harsh. I very much appreciate it. It is a welcome change, to be truthful. It helps me understand my writing better when someone comes by and lets me know straight instead of beating around the candy bush.

I've also been attempting to work on lightening my writing style slightly, I've always had heavy sentences and my teachers always gave me flak for it. But if I can't change it, oh well. That's just my style.

Thanks again!
Brittanique


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Review #19, by adluvshp The Patient

11th March 2012:
Heya again!

Well I like the progress the story is making. I like the way you have shown Draco, he would obviously be distressed by his mother's condition. I think it is very interesting what you've put in the plot.

I like the flow and narrative.

Good work going! 9/10

Cheers!
AD

Author's Response: Hey AD. Thanks for coming back.

I'm glad you like the story so far. Draco is definitely worried about his mother yes, but there are a few things that we don't know quite yet. XD

Stick around and you'll find out.

Thanks again.
Brittanique


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Review #20, by megthechef43 The Patient

9th March 2012:
Brittanique,

I'm slightly confused. Was this chapter a flashback in time? I ask because in the first chapter it stated it's been 2 or 2 1/2 years since the accident with Ron. Then at the top of this chapter it says it been a few months since Ron passed away. Or were you trying to say that she got transfered a few months after Ron's death? JW

Other than that confusion, I am really enjoying your story. I have so many questions to what is going to happen and what has happened to get Draco where he was in this chapter. What has happened to Mrs. Malfoy. It's all so intriguing.

I can't wait to read more.

Megthechef43

Author's Response: Her Meg!

Sorry for the confusion. Yes, it has been 2 1/2 years since Ron's passing. After he did, she transferred to the 'long term' ward, only a few months or so so she has been there for just over 2 years. I'll see if there is anything I can do to rework it, make it a little less confusing.

Most of your questions will be answered soon, so I hope you stick around. (:

Thanks for coming by.

Brittanique.


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Review #21, by megthechef43 The Report

9th March 2012:
Brittanique,

I'm intrigued. I can't wait to read more on this little story. I can tell Hermione is truly heartbroken by losing Ron. Though I'm glad she doesn't let the kids see her sadness. Hermione is so sweet and gentle that it is hard to read that she is tempermental. Ginny's role is perfect.

Can't wait to read more.

Megthechef43

Author's Response: Hey Meg!

I'm glad you can feel Hermione's grief. I was really hoping to get the reader into feeling it. I didn't want her to be totally mopy, so Ginny uses the kids to her advantage whenever she can because she knows how Hermione is with them.

Hope you keep reading.


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Review #22, by ginerva_molly_weasley The Report

8th March 2012:
This is a very interesting beginning to the story,

It gives us much intrigue as to the circumstances surrounding 'Ron's accident' and why Hermione is still moping around after him. By saying the accident was her fault it gives us a little insight as to why she hasn't moved on as she blames herself for it!

I;m interested to see why Hermione doesn't see Ginny anymore really because I'd always imagined that if anything had happened then she'd have wanted to surround herself with their family and friends especially because there is James and Albus.

I really want to see what she does with the letter from the dating agency though. It will be a good opportunity for her!

Author's Response: Thanks!

I was hoping to draw readers in with that little tid-bit! I'm glad it worked.

I think of Hermione the same way you do, that she would want to be surrounded by friends and family in her times of pain. But, since Harry and Ginny have children she does not want to see her sad, I think she 'suffers in silence' -so to speak- so save the boys from seeing her like that. She blames herself, which is why she's punishing herself, almost, by dragging out the grieving process of hers.

Thanks for coming by.


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Review #23, by Dracolovergirl5000 The Patient

7th March 2012:
I don't find too much depression in this story at all. I mean Hermione is grieving and there is a lot of pain in the past for her, and her memories cause most of it. However from reading your three chapters I do find that Hermione finds joy in her work, caring for her patients. If nothing else, it makes her somewhat happy so you could focus on that. I think you could also break into flashbacks again with Ron, and even before that to school, but then really focus on where her pain is coming from, and then make small, really nice things that people (Including Draco) do for her start to help her on her healing process. It is a way to play out the depression and sadness without rushing your story past it and still getting to the happier part of your fiction. I hope this helps.

Author's Response: Thanks for coming by. I'll definitely take what you said into consideration.

I planned to do more flash backs.. And eventually there wont be any so that will help her to heal and all that.


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Review #24, by ScorpiusRose17 The Patient

7th March 2012:
I really liked this chapter. It flowed nicely. I didn't read any sentences that I had to re read to try to make sense of which is good.

I was surprised when it was Mrs. Malfoy that was on the bed in the ward rather then someone else. I knew you were going to introduce Draco, but I wasn't expecting him to be at St. Mungos. It's nice to see the Post War Draco rather then the Pre War Draco. Yes, he still has his sneer, but I think that's something that will never change. He seems softer, more inquisitive. Which is a welcome change.

Hermione was again spot on. I loved how you incorporated her muggle born traits into her job. Yes, she's a witch and excessivly bright, but she still cherishes her roots. She's in a position that one can relate to because everyone knows someone or has heard of someone who has been in a comatose state.

I am still wondering about Ron and what happened. I like how there is still an air of mystery to this story. I can't wait to read what happens next. Keep up the great work. =)

-SR17

Author's Response: I'm glad that there was nothing that confused you. Sometimes my fingers move faster than my brain and things just slip through.

I wanted to show everyone the dynamic between Hermione and Draco before the story got really into it. There is going to be a lot of changing for the both of them so I figured it would be better to show you all now rather than later and rush it all. Post War Draco is somewhat a more mature Pre War Draco. He is still a little ferret but he's getting better slowly.

Every time you tell me my Hermione is good I get little goose bumps. XD Females in general are hard for me to write, especially sad ones, so it makes me happy that I am doing a beloved character so well. And yes, I chose to keep her doing muggle-like things in memory of her parents, which you will get to see later on.

Ron's situation will be revealed within the next couple of chapters so you wont need to wait for much longer.

Thanks for coming by again. (:


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Review #25, by ScorpiusRose17 The Memories

6th March 2012:
I really enjoyed this chapter. You kept very well to the characters, especially Ron's. He's moody, forgetfull, but remembers at the same time. If you don't get him right it just doesn't work. You've hit the nail on the head with him.

I really like Hermione's blacked out memory to. Sad, but an insight as to why Ginny went to extream measures to see her happy again.

I loved you descriptiveness as well. I have never been to Paris, but I know enough to know what the Efiel Tower is and I could picture it vividly in my mind. I also really liked how you used "Sandman's hangover" I've never heard it described like that and chuckled when I read it. =)

The only thing that I could see was that was confusing and I had to read a couple of times was Ginny's statement,I really am sorry about that, sweetie. I was not just me, you know, I could never fill one of those out all by myself.
The second 'I' was probably meant to be an 'It' instead.

I can't wait to see where this continues onto. Keep up your brilliant work! =)

-SR17

Author's Response: I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter. I had a hard time writing it and I'm glad to see it paid off. I agree. I love Ron so it was definitely fun.

I've never been to Paris myself either, so that is why I refrained from talking about it too much other than the hotel room which was of my imagination. I thought it was a nice touch to be near the Eiffel tower, just a bit more romantic.

Thanks for pointing that out. I didn't catch that on my read though. I'll take care of that ASAP.

Thanks again!


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