Reading Reviews for Bloody Tuesday
  
28 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Willow Inktwist What Do Death Eaters Dream Of?

3rd March 2014:


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Review #2, by alias093001 Bayard's Dream Boutique

18th December 2011:
Audrey going undercover as Caine seems risky. Though it would give them some idea of what's been going on, I get the feeling that it will only put Audrey in more danger.

I like the idea of Madam Malkin as her aunt. And, it's an interesting way of introducing Bayard's Dream Boutique.

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Review #3, by Elizabeth Wolf Bayard's Dream Boutique

17th December 2011:
Good job! I love the way you ended this chapter. I'm incredibly intrigued to find out what happens next and I just can't wait to see more of Percy. :) Also, I'm anxious to know more about Bayard's and I'm actually forming theories in my mind as to how they and the Ministry are both connected to the murders. I'll see if I'm right, I suppose.

I'm also curious as to what the letters in the descriptions are going to say. I guess I'll just have to wait and see.

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Review #4, by choufleur Bayard's Dream Boutique

5th December 2011:
YOU'RE BACK! And a lovely chapter to get us going again, I can't wait to see where things head.
I want to know more about the dreams, and more about everything really.
I loved the polyjuice potion bit and I especially like the extra details about the characters we get, such as Auntie Malkin's embroidery.
Hope you find time to write more soon!
Cathy x

Author's Response: Oh, lovely beta! Sorry I've been MIA, graduate school is a LOT of work...probably won't have the next chapter until after winter break (assuming I survive finals...120 pages of papers due by next Friday!).
Thank you so much for being so patient and awesome and supportive.

xoxo wenderbender


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Review #5, by adluvshp Bayard's Dream Boutique

4th December 2011:
Wow another awesome chapter! This is becoming more & more interesting! I wonder what's gonna happen next! And the Dream shop... hmm. very interesting! waiting for the next chp eagerly!

good work!

cheers!
AD

Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing! It's hard to keep up with HPFF now that I'm back to school...so getting reviews is really really appreciated. This chapter is a bit filler-ish because I had to get in a bunch of background info. Luckily, that's pretty much the last of it so the story can move forward! Look forward to another update in January.

xoxo wenderbender


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Review #6, by TheHeirOfSlytherin What Do Death Eaters Dream Of?

15th September 2011:
Back again for the second review you requested. :)

Harry Potter AND Inception; it's a dream come true!

A very interesting first chapter! I was hooked from the beginning and am DEFINITELY going to read more. I love the plot, I reall wanna know what going to happen next (which I will soon :P).

The man was creepy, the man who owns the machine, not the man looking for Emma, I don't know what to think of him yet. Is he supposed to be creepy? I loved the atmosphere while reading; tense and thinking: "Ah, what's happening? Gotta know more!"

10/10!

Sam.

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Review #7, by choufleur Cooperation, Mr. Caine

24th August 2011:
Love Alexey and Williamson...Audrey has such good sense over one but not the other! The menace and mystery grows and I love the fact that I've had a sneak peek :) but I am as intrigued as anyone how these disparate plot strands are going to become entwined.
Criticism: you killed Caine. And didn't show Harry enough...but hopefully he will make another guest appearance!
More soon please!

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Review #8, by TheDoctor Cooperation, Mr. Caine

21st August 2011:
Hello! Astoria Viana here (finally) and I just wann apolagize for the crazy long wait, but I hope this is still helpful.

Plot: Goodness! You've done it again! Well written and really intriguing. This is my first Audrey/Percy fic and i already love it! The mistery is developing well and your changes of perspective are smooth and each POV remains interesting to read. The little twist at the end of this chapter was brilliant! I'm curious if Harry has any suspicions of Williamson... anyway, poor Padma!... and Mr.Cain... is he dead?

While I can see the plot strands of both Inception and Harry Potter (of course) you definately have a unique and one of a kind spin on them.

Characterization: I love Audrey, she's got hufflepuff written all over her. The way you've written her as trying hard but occaionally slipping up (with Cain etc.) is lovely, especially with Williamson's little remark about her intelegence. Cain was also well done, I admit in many stories when it switches to a muggle POV it annoys me but you did realy well and I was thoroughly engaged.

Overall I'm completely hooked, your descriptors are wonderful and the story is compelling and, well I just can't wait till you update! I know I should leave so constructive critisism and I really did look for things you could change! but... well, I didn't really find anything. You're such a gifted writer! keep going and goodluck with the challenge!

~Astoria

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Review #9, by electricfeel The Seventh Murder

8th August 2011:
Hi electricfeel here again with your requested review.

Wow, this is so different from the prologue, yet I enjoyed it just as much. I'm now even more intrigued, especially as to how the prologue and your first chapter relate to each other as they seem like they could be two entirely different plots. You seem to definitely have a real talent when it comes to keeping your readers guessing and I really like that. It's a great writing technique when done well.

I loved all of the characters in this chapter and the little bouts of background information now and then. I really loved your characterisation of Caine. I loved how he wasn't the troubled genius, but in fact, a bit of a loser. That was a great touch!

Your descriptions of the crime scene were really gory. I'm not usually a fan of gore, but God, I loved it here. I think it really helped to establish just how horrific the crime scene really was. The opening paragraphs were especially fantastic. Also, having the victim be someone the reader is familiar with, again, I feel this really soldifies the crime as tragic and horrible and makes the reader feel that anger that is usually associated with particularly vicious crimes. Some may not particularly like a character like Parvati, but like Audrey says, you don't ever want to find them like that! I just felt that it took away the glamour of death that seems to occur in the Harry Potter fan fiction world.

I really have absolutely nothing negative to say about this. Just keep doing what you're doing because it is definitely working. I can't remember the last time I read a story so interesting!

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Review #10, by WeasleyTwins What Do Death Eaters Dream Of?

8th August 2011:
Hi, WeasleyTwins here to review as requested. I would like to apologize for the delay!

I read a lot of stories and often times, I forget the finer details of things I read. But if I remember correctly, this is quite different than the original first chapter? Be that as it may, I absolutely love what you have here. Your description is delicious. You have a lovely mixture of description and dialogue. That last sentence, dear goodness, was just, well, I don't have words adequate enough to describe it. It was breath-taking, really.

As to your plot, I couldn't be more thoroughly delighted with the entire thing. It is inventive, ravishing, delicious, intriguing, the whole lot of adjectives that really mean 'interesting.' I also enjoyed your main character here. He's so determined to find Emma. He's so raw and I like that. It's lovely to see a character who isn't cliche or so bizarre that it's ridiculous. I have to say that the entire chapter is lovely, absolutely smashing.

Shelby

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Review #11, by electricfeel What Do Death Eaters Dream Of?

7th August 2011:
Hi, electricfeel here from the forums with your review.

I absolutely loved this. It was intriguing, original, well researched, well written etc. It was just a fantastic first chapter. I was completely lost in the story from the very first paragraph. I have to be honest and say that I didn't like the movie Inception! So I was a little wary when I read this had been inspired by it, but I had absolutely no reason to worry.

The story flows so well, as I mentioned, I was completely lost in it. The descriptions were fantastic, especially the room with the beds. I just absolutely adored the imagery of it all, the tubes, the different beds, the people. Brilliant. "His skin was stretched parsimoniously over his beaky nose and high cheekbones, giving him the gaunt appearance of an emaciated crow" -- this was just such a fantastic line!

Another thing I love was the setting. I don't think I've ever read a story on HPFF based in Delhi. Can I ask why you chose there?

I was a little lost as to who the character actually was. I guess that was what you were after? All along I was imagining Percy until the final line "What do death eaters dream of?" So now I'm really intrigued!

Anyways, I'm sorry this review isn't more constructive, but I don't think there is anything I would change about it. Feel free to request again :)

Author's Response: Wow, thanks for for quick--and complimentary!--review. I'm glad you picked out that line...it's my absolute favorite as well. ^_^ As for why I chose Delhi...mainly, it was because one of the more important characters in the story is part of a sect of Hinduism called the Aghori, so I thought a little intro to his background would be useful. Also, part of my family is from South Asia, so I have some experience with that part of the world.

Unfortunately, this is a prologue--so the story doesn't stay in India, nor does it stick with the characters introduced. They will all reappear though, and you'll learn who "Emma" and "the deatheater" are soon!

I hope you aren't too disappointed by the next chapters, which are a bit different from the prologue--I would love to hear more of your compliments! o'.'o

xoxo wenderbender


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Review #12, by academica What Do Death Eaters Dream Of?

6th August 2011:
Hey there! academica here with your review :)

This was an interesting little chapter. I can definitely see the influences from Inception here, and I love that movie, so this is absolutely a cool idea in my book. I didn't notice any grammar, punctuation or spelling mistakes, which is always a plus. The story flowed very smoothly as well.

I was impressed by the research you clearly put into this one, what with introducing several elements of Hindu culture into your story. I can see that you worked hard to keep good continuity and to use these aspects appropriately to add to the plot. Your imagery, particularly in the beginning, was really wonderful, and it painted a clear picture of the journey of the main character as he looked for the mysterious Emma. Speaking of this character, I'm going to assume it's Draco you're speaking of. If I'm right, then you did a wonderful job in characterizing him so that I could tell who he was (by his mannerisms and dialogue) without being told his name. If I'm wrong, well, that probably says more about me than your writing, so don't fret :)

Great start. It sounds like it's going to be a really interesting story, especially for people who are fans of HP and Inception alike. Thanks for requesting a review, and I hope my comments are helpful to you!

academica (Slytherin)

Author's Response: Oh, wow! No, I never even thought of Draco--though that would have been an interesting choice! The death eater in question is not Draco, but I can't tell you who he is yet, it will be revealed more clearly in the fourth chapter. It's great to hear your theories though, that's one of my favorite parts of reviews. ^_^

Good to hear that the Inception influence was interesting rather than overwhelming. I tried to take some ideas from the film (this was written for a movie challenge!) without stealing the entire plot. It's one of my favorite movies, so I was tempted!

As for the grammar...I can only bow down in thanks to my wonderful beta, Choufleur, for her hard work. Thanks for your lovely review!

xoxo wenderbender


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Review #13, by adluvshp Cooperation, Mr. Caine

4th August 2011:
Hey there!

Wow, another chapter that blew me off.

Caine died, gosh!

I don't like this Gunner, he seems creepy. And nice to see Harry here :D

I liked how you wrote Caine's thoughts, very realistic, how confused he was and bewildered and such. Great job on that!

and OMG, Williamson is mixed up with Mulciber and the dark wizards being the head auror? that is too bad. Audrey must be in deep trouble now.

You are really building on the suspense and thrill very well.

Great chapter all in.

10/10

looking forward to the next,

Cheers!
AD

~~~

End of An Era Review Extravaganza (House Cup 2011)

Forum Name: AditiDraco95
House: Slytherin

Author's Response: Poor Caine, right? But don't worry too much, he'll reappear...just maybe not quite in the way you'd expect...

Yes, Williamson is a bad news bear. He's not a death eater himself, but he definitely means trouble for Audrey. He's possibly my least favorite character in the story, with the except of a certain person whose name begins with an "R." Whoops, can't tell you any more than that!

As for Gunner...well, he's super annoying, but I wouldn't write him off just yet. He has his own role to play in the story, and it isn't necessarily a bad one. ^_^ Hehe, I just love drawing out the mystery! But I do plan to finish this soon, so hopefully you won't be waiting for too much longer.

Thanks for always leaving such lovely reviews!
xoxo wenderbender


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Review #14, by alias093001 Cooperation, Mr. Caine

3rd August 2011:
What is Williamson's connection to the Death Eaters? He's the Head of the Auror office and yet he's making deals with a Death Eater. Is he a Death Eater himself, or simply someone who got mixed up with them?

Harry's brief appearance was unexpected, but welcomed. I hope he appears again.

Author's Response: Ah, Williamson's connection to the Death eaters is interesting, but sadly it won't be revealed for a little while. I can tell you that he isn't a Death eater himself (or ex-Death eater...with the fall of V-dubs, are they really Death eaters anymore?), but he IS in cahoots with them.

Glad you liked my Harry cameo, gotta give him a little love...I also just thought that he's the kind of guy who would really dedicate himself to his work, so he'd be in the office early.

Thanks again for your reviews! They always make my day. ^_^
xoxo wenderbender


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Review #15, by Schwans Cooperation, Mr. Caine

1st August 2011:
People in power doing bad things, I like this. Now what exactly are they working towards? Who is this person's name that starts with an R? Is it the same person from chapter one? Wondering is so much fun.

And alas, poor Caine.

Author's Response: I know! Poor Caine. Sigh. But don't worry, he'll turn up again...just not quite in the expected way...

I'm also a fan of people in power turning traitor. Bad Williamson! As for what he's working towards, well, I'm sorry to say that that issue won't be resolved for a few more chapters...on the bright side, however, you WILL get a bit more insight into mysterious Mr. R in the next chapter (already almost finished!).

Looking forward to your thoughts on the next chapter!
xoxo wenderbender


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Review #16, by alias093001 The Seventh Murder

27th July 2011:
I feel obligated to review this again, so here goes:

The fact that you added the prologue before this chapter gives me a few more questions than answers at the moment. Aside from the one I asked before: why Parvati, there is also one more: was this the same Death Eater from the previous chapter, or is it a different one?

I recall mentioning the twisted manner of Parvati's death in my previous review of this chapter, but there was one thing I overlooked; if this was the seventh murder, how dark and depraved were the other six?

All in all, I enjoyed this chapter. Can't wait for more.

Author's Response: Wow, thanks for reviewing again, I really appreciate it. Yeah, this chapter is definitely supposed to open up more questions than it resolves--after all, it's a whole new cast of characters! But the link to the prologue will become clear over the next two chapters (I think by the time chapter 4 is up, people will understand...probably faster than Audrey, actually. She's a bit slow, poor dear).

Ah, indeed, the other six. That will come up soon too, but I can assure you that they were equally (you might even say exactly) as gruesome. Thank you for your dedicated reviews, I'm looking forward to the next one!

xoxo wenderbender


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Review #17, by Ali4077 The Seventh Murder

23rd July 2011:
I loved this chapter :) I understood it far more than the prologue.. but I'm pretty sure that as the chapters come, if you continue writing it, I'll understand it a lot more.

I thought it was a good idea having the victim as someone we all knew. Makes it a little more interesting as it's a character you've followed, or at least heard of.

Also yet again your description was brilliant. It's all rather gruesome, but it wouldn't be as interesting if it wasn't would it?

I loved Audrey's relationship with Caine. I found the fact that she had to stun him hilarious, and then of course Percy turned up, just making everything even more awkward. I must admit I've never actually bothered to read a Percy/Audrey before but this one is certainly grabbing my attention. I like how little Audrey seems to currently like Percy too, it's interesting.

Great job and keep writing. I can't wait to read the next chapter. :) Thank you so much for submitting this into my challenge so I was able to read it.

Author's Response: Thanks for all the compliments on description! I got a number of comments on one of my previous stories saying that I should work on my description, so I've really been focusing on that aspect of my writing for this story. Glad to hear that it's panning out, even if most of the descriptions are a little gross. : P

Caine is easily my favorite character in the story, which is too bad because he's not really super important...well, at least not in the way you'd expect. Audrey/Percy is a relationship I've been wanting to write for a while...truthfully, I'm still struggling to write their interactions. There's only so much witty banter one can have chasing down criminals! But yes, eventually something will happen to change Audrey's mind about The Pompous Percy.

Hope you'll take a look at the new chapter! I'm looking forward to your review.
xoxo wenderbender


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Review #18, by Ali4077 What Do Death Eaters Dream Of?

23rd July 2011:
Wow this is a powerful and well written chapter...

Anyway I'm WolfieAli from the forums. :) I have a different name on here. Finally I'm getting round to reading and reviewing all my challenge entries, so sorry it's taken so long.

Your description of Rakshasi was very detailed. You could really picture the image of him in your mind, even if it wasn't a nice one. It makes the piece more visual and helps you imagine the story in your head.. which immediately makes it more interesting.

My review's a little jumbled in order but I'm just bringing up the points I loved most even if it's the end, then the beginning and such :) I go on a lot about last lines in my reviews, because to me they're the most important. It's the last part of the story you read, so the point that sticks in your head and can sometimes sum the chapter up as whole.

"What do death eaters dream of?" just makes you want to move onto the next chapter and read more. :D It definitely grabs you as a reader which I guess is exactly what the writer wants.

This was a brilliant chapter, definitely unlike anything I've ever read before. It's what makes me so pleased I created my challenge, it's opening me up to stories I wouldn't ever have considered reading before.

Great job, and onto the next chapter!

Author's Response: Hey! Sorry it's taken me forever to respond to your lovely comments. I'm really happy that you liked my chapter (even if the genre and style was a bit challenging)...thank you so much for recommending it in your blog! ^_^

Yes! "What do death eaters dream of?" is supposed to be catchy, but it's also part of the mystery. Everything is very confusing for the first few chapters, but things will begin to get clearer soon...I didn't want to show how all the characters were related too quickly. ^_^

Thank you for reviewing!
xoxo wenderbender


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Review #19, by ANP What Do Death Eaters Dream Of?

20th July 2011:
Hi there!

Again terrific writing! You scene setting is phenomenal, language is refreshing and very descriptive. You imagination is wonderful and this is very intriguing. I also want to say that you have a very good grasp over suspense and mystery and I can tell you've planned this out very well and have put a lot of effort and research into this story.

I love the chapter tittle.. it gives insight to the Englishman and also connects this chapter to the next one.. You have me and I'm sure other readers guessing who he might be. Is he the murderer? Is he a character we know from the books or a deatheater you've created? I feel that this prologue offers further insight into the depth of this story. It's not just your regular serial killer(if there is such a thing) and it offers a foreshadowing of the adventure Audrey and Percy are going on.

I really only have one suggestion.. when the Indian owner says 'You can't wake up' I think you should include 'her'.. I realize that you were trying to portray poor english, but it's just a little too confusing.

I'll be on the look out for further chapters.. you've captured my interest!

Miss Chris

Author's Response: Yay! I love reading mysteries, and I really think you write what you read (I've tried to write comedy...epic fail, truly epic). As for research, wikipedia definitely helped out, but I also have a little background in Hinduism via university. Glad that came through!

The title is part of the mystery! So I won't comment on that aspect, but I like it too. I recently realized that I have a tendency to pick my favorite line from a chapter and make that a title, but it's worked so far. The murderer in question is definitely not "regular" (though as you say, what IS a "regular" serial murderer?).

I'll definitely make the change you suggested--it can be tough to tell if something is difficult to understand when you're the author, so I really appreciate it.

Yay for reading more chapters! I hope to have the next one up soon, I'm stuck on one tiny scene, but I'm hoping for next week.

xoxo wenderbender


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Review #20, by Deltaris The Seventh Murder

20th July 2011:
I've actually read this before, have you deleted and reposted? Either way, I'm glad, because I couldn't remember the name and it intrigued me the first time through.

In comparison to the prequel, it feels as if the writing styles are different. And they are completely unrelated as of now, and I'm very curious as to how you tie everything together.

The flow was natural; descriptions giving the perfect amount of detail without becoming to heavy for the rest of the chapter. I also liked how you didn't do the typical *START/END FLASHBACK* for showing Caine's assignment situation. It fit with what was currently going on without feeling out of place. (I really hate it when people do that; enough that it makes me stop reading the story. I just can't get past it.)

Is this the same Audrey that eventually marries Percy? That's always been something of questioning; we only every saw Percy with Penelope in the series, and then JKR gives us Audrey and their kids with no explanation. If it is, I'm glad you've taken on showing how they got together. That is, assuming they do ;)

Your characterization is wonderful as well. Overall, a very good job.

Author's Response: Yes, I did delete and repost! It was originally the first chapter, but I wanted to add a prologue...thanks for rereading and reviewing.

You're right about the style change--amazing that you caught that! I talked to a friend who suggested a try adding more description and detail to my stories, so I really emphasized that in my prologue. I also had a slightly different story in mind when I wrote this chapter, so that might've come across. Hopefully it doesn't feel too disjointed, the link becomes clear in the next two chapters.

Yes, the *flashback* thing annoys me too. Good to hear that the time change was clear even without the tags ^_^. This IS the same Audrey who marries Percy...I love Audrey/Percy stories, so I couldn't help trying my hand at it.

Thanks for all the lovely compliments, I hope you'll come back and check out the next chapter once it's up!

xoxo wenderbender


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Review #21, by adluvshp The Seventh Murder

20th July 2011:
hello there.

i had already left a review for this one but since you deleted, i am leaving one again.

a nice start. again a mysterious air is built around which is quite good. the writing style is good, i can see the plot building up. the characterization is done nicely though more description on percy and more interaction between audrey and percy would be better. that can of course come in the later chapters.

good job all in all.

cheers!
AD

Author's Response: Yay, thanks for rereviewing. There will definitely be more Audrey/Percy awkwardness in the coming chapters (though sadly not in the next one...it'll have to wait until the one after that!).

Looking forward to hearing what you have to say about the next chapters!
xoxo wenderbender


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Review #22, by adluvshp What Do Death Eaters Dream Of?

20th July 2011:
hey there.

I am here with your review.

I like the sense of mystery you have built around. The strangeness of the story is totally awesome and gripping. The plot is building up nicely too. I like your description of the Rakshasi and the Aghori. Quite interesting.

Overall a very..queer and intriguing prologue which makes the reader crave for more.

great job here and i would love to see how the whole thing unfolds.

cheers!
AD

Author's Response: AD!

Thanks for your reviews. Good to hear that the plot seems "gripping" and "queer and intriguing," that's exactly what I was going for! And my big thing for this chapter was working on description, so again, thanks for the compliments!

xoxo wenderbender

P.S. podcast is recorded, almost completely edited (most unfortunately I received an email right in the middle...have to rerecord that bit!) so I'll send it in soon. ^_^


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Review #23, by Schwans The Seventh Murder

19th July 2011:
It's a gory start, now how does that first chapter tie into this storyline? I suppose the readers will find out later, but it will be fun to guess.

Author's Response: I'm glad guessing is fun (not irritating!). The next two chapters are almost finished, and they'll tie the prologue and chapter 1 together pretty clearly.

Thanks for much for you reviews!

xoxo wenderbender


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Review #24, by choufleur The Seventh Murder

18th July 2011:
Well even if my first review was deleted I can become the first review of this chapter! I thought the characterisation was great and the descriptions atmospheric and I look foward to finding out how the prologue links into this.
choufleur x

Author's Response: Yay, thanks for your review beta of awesomeness!

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Review #25, by Deltaris What Do Death Eaters Dream Of?

14th July 2011:
Well, this is certainly different. The chapter title had me intrigued right from the start, and it only seemed to grow. I liked the inclusion of the Hindu language and the foreign setting. It gives the whole thing a much more mysterious air; even though it already had one.

This dream machine sounds incredibly dangerous. Sort of like a very advanced, evil version of Fred and George's Day Dream Charms. Did you borrow that idea or come up with the machine on your own? It's very interesting, and I can't wait to see where it goes from here.

Just what do Death Eaters dream of, I wonder. I also wonder who this Death Eater is. You've created a wonderful piece of foundation work here. The flow was fantastic and the description was vivid and real. Adding in little things like the cat lightened the whole thing up, although it's still very dark.

Shoot me a PM when the next chapter is up, and I'll review that as well.

Author's Response: Deltaris! Wow you read fast! I'm happy to hear that you are "intrigued" by the prologue and think it has a "mysterious air"--that's exactly what it's supposed to be like. The dream machine is semi-inspired by the movie Inception, though I changed a number of things about it (obviously, there is magic involved!). I'm not sure if it is necessarily dangerous; it is certainly addictive, I think, which can be dangerous.

The next chapter is very different, slightly more lighthearted (well, depending on your POV I suppose) and with a whole new set of characters...but you will find out the identity of the death eater (or at least be able to make an educated guess) by chapter 3. I'll definitely PM you as soon as it's validated, and thanks so much for giving such a thoughtful review!

xoxo wenderbender


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